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10 Useful Tips To Make New Friends

10 Useful Tips To Make New Friends

There are some people who seem to always be surrounded by friends, and there are others who always seem to be standing on the outside, looking in at the crowds of friends. If you are one of the outsiders, it is time to break out of your shell and start making new friends. Here are 10 tips that will help.

1. Be Yourself

Nobody likes a phony. In fact, if you aren’t yourself, it isn’t you others are becoming friends with. When the time comes that you feel comfortable enough to act like yourself again, you may not be well received, because you are a totally different person. Let people get to know the real you.

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2. Start with People You Know

Even if you don’t think that you have a lot of friends, you likely do know a lot of people. Reach out and contact acquaintances, and reconnect with old friends you haven’t seen in a long time. Don’t forget about friends of friends. You may connect with some really cool people just by hanging out with your friends and their friends. If you are invited to go out, go. If you stay home, you aren’t going to meet people.

3. Use Technology

There are all kinds of online groups you can get involved with. Many are local groups that plan activities. For instance, Leaflets is a great place to meet new people. It creates experiences people can join, and you get to meet like-minded people who share your interests.

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4. Be Open Minded

If you go into a situation with a judgmental attitude, chances are that you aren’t going to make new friends. Be open to new people, attitudes, religions, situations, etc., and you will make some awesome new friends.

5. Ask Questions

When you meet new people, ask them questions about themselves. Not only do you get to learn more about them, it shows them that you are interested, and they are going to open up to you more.

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6. Get Out There

The only way you are going to meet new people is to get out there and do it. If you don’t know where to start, join a community group or a club. Start doing volunteer work, and take some courses. Be sure to go out to the clubs, and go to parties when you are invited.

7. Be There

In order to have friends, you need to be a friend. This means that you need to be there when others need you. If someone calls you in the middle of the night crying because their boyfriend just dumped them, don’t hang up. You may be tired, but they are in worse shape than you are. They called you, so obviously they consider you to be a friend. Be that friend.

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8. Keep in Touch

All too often, people lose touch with one another. With the Internet and social media, there is absolutely no need for that these days. Look up old friends and reconnect with them.

9. Join Work Groups

Maybe there are groups of people at your workplace who are into various activities. For instance, there may be a group who take walks on their lunch hours, or a lunch time exercise class. Get involved with activities that are going on in the workplace, and you are likely to meet many new friends.

10. Know When to Offer Information

Even though you should be an open book with your closest friends, you don’t want to reveal too much information about yourself too quickly. This is often a huge turnoff for others. If they don’t know you well, they may not want to know certain personal details. Keep it to yourself for now.

Featured photo credit: rehood via pixabay.com

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Jane Hurst

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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