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5 Types Of Communication That Determine Your Relationships

5 Types Of Communication That Determine Your Relationships

There are 5 types of communication needed to start and continue a relationship: optical, auditory, emotional, nonverbal, and verbal. From the time you see someone to the time you speak to someone, seconds of communication have already happened.

Communication, in the simplest form, is sending out a message and receiving it. Messages sent out take place in several different ways. Once you understand and learn to apply all 5 of these types of communication, you will be a master at getting and keeping solid personal and professional relationships.

1. Optical

Optical communication is “seeing” someone, having your sights set on someone, and noticing the existence of someone. The moment your peepers see another person and their peepers see you, the optical type of communication begins.

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You see what they look like, what they are wearing, the hairdo, the facial expression, their body position, their body type, and instantly have thoughts like, “I like what I see,” or “I will look elsewhere.” If you like what you see and the other person likes what they see, then another decision as to “the next step” takes place. You or the other person will find a way to get closer and begin the second type of communication.

2. Auditory

Auditory communication is (in my opinion) the most important of all 5 types. This is the listening communication.

Wait, you mean to say that listening is communicating? I thought speaking is communicating?

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Well, let me answer this question with asking you this: have you ever said something like “my dog just died,” and the other person replied with “that’s nice”? Why would anyone say it is nice that your dog died? Because they were not listening, they were not tuned in, and they were not interested. How did that make you feel? Do you think you would have gotten a better response had the person been “tuned in” and listened to what you said? You bet the response would have been more appropriate—this emphasizes the need for listening. When you are tuned in and listen to the other person, you are more likely to pick up on another type of communication: emotional.

3. Emotional

Emotional communication is so important to all aspects of beginning and moving forward in a relationship, so much so that Facebook finally caught up with the 5 additional reaction emojis to its “Like” button. These buttons allow a person to “react with emotion” to a post with more than just “like.” They can now express love, laughter, anger, sadness, and amazement.

Why is it so important for Facebook to make this change to their “Like” button? For the same reason that I mentioned before with the example of the dog. The person in that example said “that’s nice,” and you were no doubt hurt that they reacted in a way that demonstrated inattentiveness and not listening. With these 5 emojis, people can react emotionally and more appropriately to messages that are posted. Now, when you post that your dog died, rather than receiving “likes,” you’ll get the “sad emoji,” letting you know that others care.

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Can you see that emotional communication really matters in a relationship? Whether it be a personal or professional relationship, an appropriate response will more likely keep that relationship moving forward.

4. Non-Verbal

Non-verbal communication includes tone of voice, pauses, rate of speech, facial expressions, body positions (i.e. crossed arms)—even walking away is a type of non-verbal communication. If you are speaking to someone and they smile, you will likely feel affirmed and that things are going well. If someone frowns in reaction to what you said, you get the message that someone disagrees with what you said. Non-verbal cues impact the understanding of what spoken and unspoken communication is taking place between people in a relationship.

5. Verbal

Verbal communication is using language in the form of sentences, phrases, and dialogue—but everyone already knows this, right?

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In reality, it is much more than that. The words spoken can be misunderstood. However, there is a way to keep your words from being misunderstood. Speak and watch for clues of acceptance. If you are really attentive, you can use words in your sentences, phrases, and dialogues that resonate more positively with the other person and will lead to a positive communication experience. A positive communication experience will lead to more positive experiences. This means more enjoyable interactions that will help to maintain the relationship and keep it moving forward.

By now, you have a more holistic approach to communicating in a relationship. Here is a hint: speak to the other person with expressions and be watchful for clues in the way the other person looks, listens, and reacts to you. Also, after reading this article, you have a better understanding of what to do to start and stay in a relationship—and so will your partner after you share this article with them!

Featured photo credit: Angelo González via imcreator.com

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Last Updated on July 3, 2020

30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

In today’s world, true peace must come from within us and our own actions. Here are 30 small things you can do on a regular basis to increase your overall sense of harmony, peace, and well-being:

1. Don’t go to every fight you’re invited to

Particularly when you’re around those who thrive on chaos, be willing to decline the invitation to join in on the drama.

2. Focus on your breath

Throughout the day, stop to take a few deep breaths. Keep stress at bay with techniques such as “square breathing.” Breathe in for four counts, hold for four counts, then out for four counts, and hold again for four counts. Repeat this cycle four times.

3. Get organized and purge old items

A cluttered space often creates a cluttered spirit. Take the time to get rid of anything you haven’t used in a year and invest in organizational systems that help you sustain a level of neatness.

4. Stop yourself from being judgmental

Whenever you are tempted to have an opinion about someone else’s life, check your intentions. Judging others creates and promotes negative energy.

5. Say ‘thank you’ early and often

Start and end each day with an attitude of gratitude. Look for opportunities in your daily routine and interactions to express appreciation.

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6. Smile more

Even if you have to “fake it until you make it,” there are many scientific benefits of smiling and laughing. Also, pay attention to your facial expression when you are doing neutral activities such as driving and walking. Turn that frown upside down!

7. Don’t worry about the future

As difficult as this sounds, there is a direct connection between staying in the present and living a more peaceful life. You cannot control the future. As the old proverb goes, “Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it won’t get you anywhere.” Practice gently bringing your thoughts back to the present.

8. Eat real food

The closer the food is to the state from which it came from the earth, the better you will feel in eating it. Choose foods that grew from a plant over food that was made in a plant.

9. Choose being happy over being right

Too often, we sacrifice inner peace in order to make a point. It’s rarely worth it.

10. Keep technology out of the bedroom

Many studies, such as one conducted by Brigham and Women’s Hospital, have connected blue light of electronic devices before bed to adverse sleep and overall health. To make matters worse, many people report that they cannot resist checking email and social media when their cell phone is in reach of their bed, regardless of the time.

11. Make use of filtering features on social media

You may not want to “unfriend” someone completely, however you can choose whether you want to follow their posts and/or the sources of information that they share.

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12. Get comfortable with silence

When you picture someone who is the ultimate state of peace, typically they aren’t talking.

13. Listen to understand, not to respond

So often in conversations, we use our ears to give us cues about when it is our turn to say what we want to say. Practice active listening, ask questions, process, then speak.

14. Put your troubles in a bubble

Whenever you start to feel anxious, visualize the situation being wrapped in a bubble and then picture that sphere floating away.

15. Speak more slowly

Often a lack of peace manifests itself in fast or clipped speech. Take a breath, slow down, and let your thoughtful consideration drive your words.

16. Don’t procrastinate

Nothing adds stress to our lives like waiting until the last minute.

17. Buy a coloring book

Mandala coloring books for adults are becoming more popular because of their connection to creating inner peace.

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18. Prioritize yourself

You are the only person who you are guaranteed to live with 24 hours a day for the rest of your life.

19. Forgive others

Holding a grudge is hurting you exponentially more than anyone else. Let it go.

20. Check your expectations

Presumption often leads to drama. Remember the old saying, “Expectations are premeditated resentments.”

21. Engage in active play

Let your inner child come out and have some fun. Jump, dance, play, and pretend!

22. Stop criticizing yourself

The world is a hard enough place with more than enough critics. Your life is not served well by being one of them.

23. Focus your energy and attention on what you want

Thoughts, words, and actions all create energy. Energy attracts like energy. Put out what you want to get back.

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24. Assign yourself “complaint free” days.

Make a conscious decision not to complain about anything for a whole day. It might be harder than you think and the awareness will stick with you.

25. Surround yourself with people you truly enjoy being in the company of

Personalities tend to be contagious, and not everyone’s is worth catching. Be judicious in your choices.

26. Manage your money

Financial concerns rank top on the list of what causes people stress. Take the time each month to do a budget, calculate what you actually spend and sanity check that against the money you have coming in.

27. Stop trying to control everything

Not only is your inner control freak sabotaging your sense of peace, it is also likely getting in the way of external relationships as well.

28. Practice affirmations

Repeat positive phrases that depict the life and qualities you want to attract. It may not come naturally to you, but it works.

29. Get up before sunrise

Personally witnessing the dawn brings a unique sense of awe and appreciation for life.

30. Be yourself

Nothing creates more inner discord than trying to be something other than who we really are. Authenticity breeds happiness.

Featured photo credit: man watching sunrise via stokpic.com

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