Advertising
Advertising

A Sorry Letter To Myself, Though That “Me” Doesn’t Exist Anymore

A Sorry Letter To Myself, Though That “Me” Doesn’t Exist Anymore

Hey Me,

I am sorry you were so afraid, so startled and so alone.

I am sorry I wasn’t strong enough to stand behind you when you really needed to believe. I am really sorry for not supporting you to be anything you wanted to be. No person should ever be left alone in the desperation of solitude. But you were, and I want to remind you something.

When you were told that writing was a hobby, you secretly whispered ‘no’. When they didn’t allow you to study a degree in Arts, you didn’t give in and kept practicing. When the struggles like depression and asxiety appeared, you never stop fighting. When people scared you saying ‘it is tough’, ‘it requires a lot of work’, ‘you are going to starve with no income,’ you didn’t listen to their words.

Advertising

Thank you for standing strong for both of us, even if there were times where they bent your will and crushed your hopes; when there was times where striving seemed pointless. Thank you, because without you there would be no me today.

I am just sorry you had to endure it all on your own and that it took me so long, more than a decade, to realize it was all worth it. Yes, the tears and the depression and the doubts… All was worth it to be here today.

But the painful truth is that deep down each single word others said yielded your spirit. You tried to not let them see you down even if you were broken and bleeding inside. But it did get to you.

I am sorry you had to do it alone. But I couldn’t be more proud of you, little girl. Because when nobody, not a single person, encouraged you to pursue your dream, our dream, you refused to believe they were right no matter how much you wanted to scream it out loud.

Advertising

Looking back, it still hurt.

I know how many times you felt desperate, running away in to the darkness. I know how many times you wanted to abandon and admit it was useless. I remember each single time you felt hopelessly worthless, crying yourself to sleep because the world didn’t wanted to see how great you could be.

I know because I was there, and your pain has been my pain. And your fears are my fears today.

And your bravery, my child, that bravery is my drive today.

Advertising

The truth is: it is not over. I am a writer today but people still saying I should just bail and live a comfortable, dull life. It makes me fearful and doubtful; what if they are right after all? Should I just quit? Is it too late to stop challenging myself?

But thanks to you I refuse to believe them.

I refuse to listen for my own sake but also for your memory: because deep down, even in your worst hour, you didn’t yield. Not completely. You found your path, which is also mine, and you raced against the odds and storms.

You didn’t admit a defeat.

Advertising

I am sorry that I was weak, a fool and too afraid to stand behind our dreams. That is why I have gathered my entire valor and my gratitude, and commit myself to the labor of never, ever surrender.

You deserve more and I will dare the impossible to make it happen.

Even if who you were does no longer exist, within me there will always live a little girl, too scared to say aloud ‘I am a writer.’

I will say it for you: I am a writer. I didn’t give up on my dream. And I will never let you down again.

And you, dear reader, you shouldn’t either.

Featured photo credit: Doug Robichaud via unsplash.com

More by this author

A Sorry Letter To Myself, Though That “Me” Doesn’t Exist Anymore What It Really Feels Like To Have Depression 5 Reasons Why Youth is a Time of No Regret Step-By-Step Guide: How To Manage Your Anger

Trending in Communication

1 9 Reasons Why a Social Media Detox Is Good for You 2 Is Social Media Ruining Our Lives, Or Are We? 3 How to Turn Your Fear of Missing Out into a Joy of Missing Out 4 15 Things Highly Confident People Don’t Do 5 How to Find Motivation When You’re Totally Burnt Out

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on October 6, 2020

15 Things Highly Confident People Don’t Do

15 Things Highly Confident People Don’t Do

Highly confident people believe in their ability to achieve. If you don’t believe in yourself, why should anyone else put their faith in you? To walk with swagger and improve your self-confidence, watch out for these fifteen things highly confident people don’t do.

And if you want to know the difference between an arrogant person and a confident person, watch this video first:

 

1. They don’t make excuses.

Highly confident people take ownership of their thoughts and actions. They don’t blame the traffic for being tardy at work; they were late. They don’t excuse their short-comings with excuses like “I don’t have the time” or “I’m just not good enough”; they make the time and they keep on improving until they are good enough.

Advertising

2. They don’t avoid doing the scary thing.

Highly confident people don’t let fear dominate their lives. They know that the things they are afraid of doing are often the very same things that they need to do in order to evolve into the person they are meant to be.

3. They don’t live in a bubble of comfort.

Highly confident people avoid the comfort zone, because they know this is a place where dreams die. They actively pursue a feeling of discomfort, because they know stretching themselves is mandatory for their success.

4. They don’t put things off until next week.

Highly confident people know that a good plan executed today is better than a great plan executed someday. They don’t wait for the “right time” or the “right circumstances”, because they know these reactions are based on a fear of change. They take action here, now, today – because that’s where progress happens.

5. They don’t obsess over the opinions of others.

Highly confident people don’t get caught up in negative feedback. While they do care about the well-being of others and aim to make a positive impact in the world, they don’t get caught up in negative opinions that they can’t do anything about. They know that their true friends will accept them as they are, and they don’t concern themselves with the rest.

Advertising

6. They don’t judge people.

Highly confident people have no tolerance for unnecessary, self-inflicted drama. They don’t feel the need to insult friends behind their backs, participate in gossip about fellow co-workers or lash out at folks with different opinions. They are so comfortable in who they are that they feel no need to look down on other people.

7. They don’t let lack of resources stop them.

Highly confident people can make use of whatever resources they have, no matter how big or small. They know that all things are possible with creativity and a refusal to quit. They don’t agonize over setbacks, but rather focus on finding a solution.

8. They don’t make comparisons.

Highly confident people know that they are not competing with any other person. They compete with no other individual except the person they were yesterday. They know that every person is living a story so unique that drawing comparisons would be an absurd and simplistic exercise in futility.

9. They don’t find joy in people-pleasing.

Highly confident people have no interest in pleasing every person they meet. They are aware that not all people get along, and that’s just how life works. They focus on the quality of their relationships, instead of the quantity of them.

Advertising

10. They don’t need constant reassurance.

Highly confident people aren’t in need of hand-holding. They know that life isn’t fair and things won’t always go their way. While they can’t control every event in their life, they focus on their power to react in a positive way that moves them forward.

11. They don’t avoid life’s inconvenient truths.

Highly confident people confront life’s issues at the root before the disease can spread any farther. They know that problems left unaddressed have a way of multiplying as the days, weeks and months go by. They would rather have an uncomfortable conversation with their partner today than sweep an inconvenient truth under the rug, putting trust at risk.

12. They don’t quit because of minor set-backs.

Highly confident people get back up every time they fall down. They know that failure is an unavoidable part of the growth process. They are like a detective, searching for clues that reveal why this approach didn’t work. After modifying their plan, they try again (but better this time).

13. They don’t require anyone’s permission to act.

Highly confident people take action without hesitation. Every day, they remind themselves, “If not me, who?”

Advertising

14. They don’t limit themselves to a small toolbox.

Highly confident people don’t limit themselves to Plan A. They make use of any and all weapons that are at their disposal, relentlessly testing the effectiveness of every approach, until they identify the strategies that offer the most results for the least cost in time and effort.

15. They don’t blindly accept what they read on the Internet as “truth” without thinking about it.

Highly confident people don’t accept articles on the Internet as truth just because some author “said so”. They look at every how-to article from the lens of their unique perspective. They maintain a healthy skepticism, making use of any material that is relevant to their lives, and forgetting about the rest. While articles like this are a fun and interesting thought-exercise, highly confident people know that they are the only person with the power to decide what “confidence” means.

Read Next