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Step-By-Step Guide To Arguing With An Irrational Person

Step-By-Step Guide To Arguing With An Irrational Person

It can be very difficult to deal with irrational behaviour. Irrational people often choose to ignore reason and logic because they are focused on making a certain point, and they don’t want anything to get in the way of that. Sadly, most people have at least one irrational person in their lives. However, unless they have issues with mental health, you can always bring an irrational person back to reality. You can use certain techniques to communicate with irrational people – you can even find common ground with each other.

If you want to be able to communicate effectively with an angry, irrational person, follow our step-by-step guide below.

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1. Avoid intentionally pushing their buttons

If you know the person well, it is likely that you know exactly how to push their buttons and wind them up. This tactic should be totally avoided; choosing to wind someone up is childish, petty and offensive. It can also validate the other person’s irrational behavior. Keep the argument civil by only bringing up relevant comments.

2. Use evidence

Evidence is essential to win an argument – especially with an irrational person. Proof is difficult to deny, so back up your points with reliable and specific evidence. Consider what kind of evidence the irrational person is most likely to trust; are they very logical, or emotional? Some people are more likely to be swayed by a scientific study, and others are more likely to trust a magazine article.

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3. Point out logical fallacies

Irrational people often warp logic so that it works in their favor – don’t be afraid to call this behavior out. For instance, the logic “silence fallacy” is the idea that if there is no evidence for something, it must not exist, such as germs, God or aliens. Often people think they are being logical until someone points out the flaw in their thinking.

4. Argue about your ideas (not each other)

An argument is a good chance to discuss different opinions and see other perspectives. Do not call the other person stupid for their opinions; people are much more likely to become defensive (and more irrational) if you do. Instead focus on the subject of the argument to help resolve the situation.

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5. Use ‘we’ rather than ‘You’ or ‘I’

Language is very important during an argument. Saying ‘you’ and ‘I’ creates an unnecessary divide that will further drive you apart, but using ‘we’ shows you both as a single unit, encouraging the irrational person to see your point of view.

6. Respect their points

Treat others as you wish to be treated; If you are rude and disrespectful to someone during a fight, they will probably behave the same way. Remember that arguments are two-sided, and it is fine to disagree with their point, but to completely dismiss it makes the whole argument pointless.

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7. Apologize when you are wrong

Sometimes people say things during fights that are hurtful without realizing it. If you are arguing with an irrational person and you hurt their feelings, acknowledge it, apologize and move on. Irrational people often struggle to let go of certain things, and without an apology it is unlikely that they will try to understand your point of view.

8. Know when to drop the argument

It can be tough to let an argument go, but sometimes it is for the best. People rarely change their mind during a fight, but often they will go home and reflect on it, and slowly their opinion will change.

If you refuse to let the fight go even when the other person is upset or angry, you may be the irrational person. Respect that everyone has different opinions and you cannot make everyone think like you do. End the argument kindly by saying “I think we have very different opinions on this subject, which is fine. Hopefully we both learned something new today.”

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Amy Johnson

Freelance writer, editor and social media manager.

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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