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Psychologists Find The Surprising Benefit Of Going Through Hard Times

Psychologists Find The Surprising Benefit Of Going Through Hard Times

Going through hard times is rough and uncomfortable, but there are hidden benefits that make it worth it. No one really enjoys the experience of being homeless, jobless, a victim of identity theft, losing your home and most of your belongings to fire, flood or even a tornado, living with cancer in your body, etc., but psychologists say that these lifetime events make us stronger physically and mentally.

According to a research report by Psychologists, Judith Mangelsdorf and Michael Eid: What makes a thriver? Unifying the concepts of posttraumatic and postecstatic growth, “Individuals who lived through posttraumatic growth typically report positive changes in the areas of relationships, spirituality, appreciation of life, openness for new possibilities, and personal strengths.”

1. Relationships

After going through a traumatic event such as losing a loved one, people usually feel closer to their friends and family members. Before the trauma, we tend to take for granted our friendship and kinship with those we have in our lives. After the trauma, such as suffering a loss of someone who meant a great deal to us, like a parent or grand-parent, we realize how precious time is for sharing life with those who are closest to us in our lives and we make more of an effort to connect with them.

Like the song says : “Goin fishin isn’t such an imposition.” (Tim McGraw, Live Like you were Dying)

2. Spirituality

Surviving a life-threatening event makes us realize our lives on earth are temporary and we reach out to a higher power to feel safe. Let’s face it, just about everyone I know fears dying. So, when life throws a curve ball, like being diagnosed with cancer, and you feel scared, it’s comforting to know that no matter what happens, you are going to be alright. We know we are powerless at times against cancer, fire, floods, tornadoes, job loss, etc., so it helps to connect with a high power who has the control over our lives we do not have.

3. Appreciation of Life

When we come face to face with an event whereby we could have been killed, such as a plane crash, we tend to see our life from a different point of view. We usually call it “a second chance” and tend to take inventory to see what we have done in our lifetime and what it is we have not done. While we go through the pain and agony of being broken and bruised, we make plans to have fun and be more spontaneous, and maybe even change our schedule to allow for more family time.

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4. Openness to new Possibilities

Suddenly, after having survived an event that ordinarily would have resulted in death, we view our lives looking through a lens we never used before: “possibilities.” Before the traumatic experience, we may have been set on a course and no one or nothing would steer us off of it, but now, since we have been given more time to live, other possibilities come into play.

Perhaps, there is a new invention written in a notebook with a hesitance to go through the process of making it a real product for others to use, but now there is an urge to take the invention idea to the next level. Or you have had a thought concerning a new career and now being a survivor of hard times, you are open to making a career change.

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5. Personal Strength

An event that nearly takes our life away can make us feel stronger physically and mentally for having survived it. Now we are thinking that we can be more adaptable to certain people and circumstances than ever before. Psychologist believe that after a person survives a death-defying event, their thought processes change significantly and begin to think of themselves more capable of handling anything life throws at them.

Life definitely has its ups and downs, with its hard times. It’s not a pleasant experience going through these challenging times, but it is somewhat comforting to know that you will survive them and be stronger in the long run.

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Featured photo credit: Psychedelic Vision Walk in the Forest via picjumbo.com

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Last Updated on December 2, 2018

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

When giving a presentation or speech, you have to engage your audience effectively in order to truly get your point across. Unlike a written editorial or newsletter, your speech is fleeting; once you’ve said everything you set out to say, you don’t get a second chance to have your voice heard in that specific arena.

You need to make sure your audience hangs on to every word you say, from your introduction to your wrap-up. You can do so by:

1. Connecting them with each other

Picture your typical rock concert. What’s the first thing the singer says to the crowd after jumping out on stage? “Hello (insert city name here)!” Just acknowledging that he’s coherent enough to know where he is is enough for the audience to go wild and get into the show.

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It makes each individual feel as if they’re a part of something bigger. The same goes for any public speaking event. When an audience hears, “You’re all here because you care deeply about wildlife preservation,” it gives them a sense that they’re not just there to listen, but they’re there to connect with the like-minded people all around them.

2. Connect with their emotions

Speakers always try to get their audience emotionally involved in whatever topic they’re discussing. There are a variety of ways in which to do this, such as using statistics, stories, pictures or videos that really show the importance of the topic at hand.

For example, showing pictures of the aftermath of an accident related to drunk driving will certainly send a specific message to an audience of teenagers and young adults. While doing so might be emotionally nerve-racking to the crowd, it may be necessary to get your point across and engage them fully.

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3. Keep going back to the beginning

Revisit your theme throughout your presentation. Although you should give your audience the credit they deserve and know that they can follow along, linking back to your initial thesis can act as a subconscious reminder of why what you’re currently telling them is important.

On the other hand, if you simply mention your theme or the point of your speech at the beginning and never mention it again, it gives your audience the impression that it’s not really that important.

4. Link to your audience’s motivation

After you’ve acknowledged your audience’s common interests in being present, discuss their motivation for being there. Be specific. Using the previous example, if your audience clearly cares about wildlife preservation, discuss what can be done to help save endangered species’ from extinction.

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Don’t just give them cold, hard facts; use the facts to make a point that they can use to better themselves or the world in some way.

5. Entertain them

While not all speeches or presentations are meant to be entertaining in a comedic way, audiences will become thoroughly engaged in anecdotes that relate to the overall theme of the speech. We discussed appealing to emotions, and that’s exactly what a speaker sets out to do when he tells a story from his past or that of a well-known historical figure.

Speakers usually tell more than one story in order to show that the first one they told isn’t simply an anomaly, and that whatever outcome they’re attempting to prove will consistently reoccur, given certain circumstances.

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6. Appeal to loyalty

Just like the musician mentioning the town he’s playing in will get the audience ready to rock, speakers need to appeal to their audience’s loyalty to their country, company, product or cause. Show them how important it is that they’re present and listening to your speech by making your words hit home to each individual.

In doing so, the members of your audience will feel as if you’re speaking directly to them while you’re addressing the entire crowd.

7. Tell them the benefits of the presentation

Early on in your presentation, you should tell your audience exactly what they’ll learn, and exactly how they’ll learn it. Don’t expect them to listen if they don’t have clear-cut information to listen for. On the other hand, if they know what to listen for, they’ll be more apt to stay engaged throughout your entire presentation so they don’t miss anything.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm4.staticflickr.com

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