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11 Signs You’re So Independent You Scare People Away (And Why It’s Alright)

11 Signs You’re So Independent You Scare People Away (And Why It’s Alright)

Being highly independent is a good thing. It means you are strong and you have something working right for you, both professionally and personally. However, this can be an intimidating personality to some who feel bewildered by what the term “independence” means.

It’s awesome to be independent, but you should be watchful of the following signs because they just might scare some people away.

1. You are focused on your career

Your career takes so much of your time and energy, it almost feels like a vacuum. Other activities not related to your job might seem mundane in comparison.

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2. You know how to say “no”

You have become great at saying “no” to things or activities that do not drive you to your goals. You totally dominate your focus on time and resources. You do not want anyone messing up with what you have going on.

3. You take care of your bills

You are in control of your finances. If someone wants to help you out with taking care of this, you would gladly never oblige to it.

4. You are ambitious

You always want more out of life. Good is not enough, you know you can be better. You are always improving yourself and doing well to make sure you are a better fit for your aspirations.

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5. You are selective about relationships

You do not throw yourself at every association or relationship that comes your way. You are meticulous about the relationship you want to go into. You look at patterns and ask yourself the right questions before dipping yourself into any alliances.

6. You are strong

You are not easily fooled or intimidated. Since you are independent, you know what you want out of life and you are clear about it. This affects your self-esteem and confidence positively as you would not accept less than what you feel you deserve.

7. You are realistic

You do not chase after the wind. You know your strengths and flaws. You are willing to use this knowledge as a compass to pursuing those things you want. You are also realistic about your direction and where you are going.

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8. You are not comfortable being with needy people

This may push such people away, as you always want activity around you rather than idleness. Yes, such attitude towards people who are not making the best use of their energy and time can make you look icy and callous, but it is just who you are. It has worked so far.

9. You are in control of your life

You are in control of your activities, the way you expend your energy and resources, and you will only give yourself to things that you are interested in because, at the end of the day, it is not about what others think.

10. You plan for the future

You know that living is not about the present, you also have to think of where you will be in the next couple of years. You make plans and organize your affairs in a way that you will meet the future you are determined to get or that you feel you deserve.

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11. You are cool with being on your own

You don’t feel needy or try to depend on others. You know how to manage yourself. You are cool with being on your own. Even if no one calls you or tries to contact you, you are fine. You wouldn’t want to trouble others or be in their face. Instead, you would rather find ways to deal with your challenges or situations. At the end of the day, that is what independence means and you are fully up to the task of embracing your true self.

Conclusion

Being highly independent can scare some people away, but you are not callous or mean, you just know how to get the things you want and deserve. What is so wrong about that?

Featured photo credit: http://www.compfight.com via compfight.com

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Last Updated on August 16, 2018

10 Ways To Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone And Enjoy Taking Risks

10 Ways To Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone And Enjoy Taking Risks

The ability to take risks by stepping outside your comfort zone is the primary way by which we grow. But we are often afraid to take that first step.

In truth, comfort zones are not really about comfort, they are about fear. Break the chains of fear to get outside. Once you do, you will learn to enjoy the process of taking risks and growing in the process.

Here are 10 ways to help you step out of your comfort zone and get closer to success:

1. Become aware of what’s outside of your comfort zone

What are the things that you believe are worth doing but are afraid of doing yourself because of the potential for disappointment or failure?

Draw a circle and write those things down outside the circle. This process will not only allow you to clearly identify your discomforts, but your comforts. Write identified comforts inside the circle.

2. Become clear about what you are aiming to overcome

Take the list of discomforts and go deeper. Remember, the primary emotion you are trying to overcome is fear.

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How does this fear apply uniquely to each situation? Be very specific.

Are you afraid of walking up to people and introducing yourself in social situations? Why? Is it because you are insecure about the sound of your voice? Are you insecure about your looks?

Or, are you afraid of being ignored?

3. Get comfortable with discomfort

One way to get outside of your comfort zone is to literally expand it. Make it a goal to avoid running away from discomfort.

Let’s stay with the theme of meeting people in social settings. If you start feeling a little panicked when talking to someone you’ve just met, try to stay with it a little longer than you normally would before retreating to comfort. If you stay long enough and practice often enough, it will start to become less uncomfortable.

4. See failure as a teacher

Many of us are so afraid of failure that we would rather do nothing than take a shot at our dreams.

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Begin to treat failure as a teacher. What did you learn from the experience? How can you take that lesson to your next adventure to increase your chance of success?

Many highly successful people failed plenty of times before they succeeded. Here’re some examples:

10 Famous Failures to Success Stories That Will Inspire You to Carry On

5. Take baby steps

Don’t try to jump outside your comfort zone, you will likely become overwhelmed and jump right back in.

Take small steps toward the fear you are trying to overcome. If you want to do public speaking, start by taking every opportunity to speak to small groups of people. You can even practice with family and friends.

Take a look at this article on how you can start taking baby steps:

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The Number One Secret to Life Success: Baby Steps

6. Hang out with risk takers

There is no substitute for this step. If you want to become better at something, you must start hanging out with the people who are doing what you want to do and start emulating them. (Here’re 8 Reasons Why Risk Takers Are More Likely To Be Successful).

Almost inevitably, their influence will start have an effect on your behavior.

7. Be honest with yourself when you are trying to make excuses

Don’t say “Oh, I just don’t have the time for this right now.” Instead, be honest and say “I am afraid to do this.”

Don’t make excuses, just be honest. You will be in a better place to confront what is truly bothering you and increase your chance of moving forward.

8. Identify how stepping out will benefit you

What will the ability to engage in public speaking do for your personal and professional growth? Keep these potential benefits in mind as motivations to push through fear.

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9. Don’t take yourself too seriously

Learn to laugh at yourself when you make mistakes. Risk taking will inevitably involve failure and setbacks that will sometimes make you look foolish to others. Be happy to roll with the punches when others poke fun.

If you aren’t convinced yet, check out these 6 Reasons Not to Take Life So Seriously.

10. Focus on the fun

Enjoy the process of stepping outside your safe boundaries. Enjoy the fun of discovering things about yourself that you may not have been aware of previously.

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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