Advertising
Advertising

Science Says It’s More Than How You Look that Makes You Attractive

Science Says It’s More Than How You Look that Makes You Attractive

Attractiveness is more than just physical beauty. It is a magnetic force that pulls people together, connecting people of different sizes and shapes. Since attractiveness contributes to such spontaneous encounters, if you are looking for a golden rule, you would be disappointed.

Yet in fact, it is good that you would be disappointed. As the American best-selling self-help author and motivational speaker Dr. Wayne Dyer argues, “The law of attraction is this: You don’t attract what you want, you attract what you are.” Birds of a feather flock together. So the good news is, we do not need to change ourselves to fit a social ideal in order to be more attractive. Instead, Science says, what is most important is to develop our own personality and have the desire to engage in deep relationships with other people.

1. Music Cultivates Individuality

In a 2014 study, researchers asked about 1,500 individuals (whose average age was 28) to rate the attractiveness of different composers according to the music they make. The results showed that people preferred music that is more complicated in style and structure. They also say that they would more likely develop long term relationships with those who compose more complex music.

Music is a tool for expression. Our personality and tastes develop as we explore different kinds of music. So it might be a good idea for you to start varying your choice of music and even learn new musical instruments!

2. Extreme Sports Strengthen Mind and Body

Extreme sports can train both our bodies and minds to make us stronger persons, thus making us more attractive. According to a 2014 study led by researchers at the University of Alaska at Anchorage for example, it is discovered that those who take “hunter-gatherer risks” are generally considered to be more attractive.

Advertising

Hunter-gatherer risks are similar to the risks faced by ancestral humans. They include mountain biking, deep-sea scuba diving, and extreme rollerblading. 

3. Confidence Gives Us Good Sense of Humour

Our fear of not fitting in makes us boring. Hence, the key to be attractive and have a good sense of humour is to accept ourselves as who we are.

Multiple scientific studies for example indicate that people are more attracted to those who can make them laugh.

In one small study, a psychologist asked three men to tell a joke to their friends while a woman sat at a nearby table. They were then instructed to approach the woman and ask for her number. Results showed that the guys who joked were three times as likely to get the woman’s number. They were also rated more attractive and intelligent by the woman.

“The effect of a great sense of humor on women’s attractions might be partially explained by the fact that funny people are considered to be more social and more intelligent, things that women seek in a mate,” anthropologist Gil Greengross writes.

Advertising

4. Having Good Friends Makes Us Attractive

It is not enough just to develop our individuality. In order to be more attractive, we should surround ourselves with friends. This is not only because our friends can have positive influence on us and make our personalities more attractive, a 2014 study from the University of California at San Diego found that people look better in a group.

In one experiment, people were assigned to look at the faces of men and women, once in a group photo and once in an isolated portrait. Results showed that participants rated both men and women significantly more attractive when they were pictured in a group.

One possibility is: our brains take the faces of a group in aggregate, hence making each face more “average”– and therefore attractive.

“Having a few wingmen or wingwomen may indeed be a good dating strategy, particularly if their facial features complement and average out one’s unattractive idiosyncrasies,” study authors Drew Walker and Edward Vul write.

5. A Person’s Most Attractive Trait is Their Availability

When talking about attractiveness, we usually think about appearance and personalities. However, research shows that a person’s most attractive trait is their availability. The more readily available we are for deep relationships, the more attractive we are.

Advertising

In dating, it is more about physical availability. But this is not enough. Long-term romantic partners is about emotional availability: “Will this person open up to me?” Openness to engage in deeper relationships is also important in friendship.

In business it is about economic and intellectual availability. “Will this person work with me?”

This is because everyone, including the people we appeal to, desire connection and intimate relationships. Everyone has the mutual fear of being rejected. Availability can therefore open up our doors to other people and render us more attractive.

6. Open Up Yourself for Deeper Conversations

In a 1997 study, State University of New York psychologist Arthur Aron and colleagues designed two sets of questions for two groups of undergrads to guide their conversations. One question set was small talk, and the other included deeper questions. The people who asked deeper questions felt more connected. One couple even fell in love.

Deeper conversations allow us to develop our personalities and better understand ourselves and each other. Hence, the more we desire to open up for deeper conversations, the more attractive we become.

Advertising

7. A Simple Smile Makes One More Beautiful

Ultimately, beauty comes from our heart. Two experiments in Switzerland found that the stronger a person smile, the more attractive his/ her face looked. A happy facial expression can even compensate for relative unattractiveness.

Another study called “Happy Guys Finish Last: The Impact of Emotion Expressions on Sexual Attraction” that was published in Emotion also discover that happiness is the most attractive emotion in females.

Hence, a simple smile can make one more beautiful and attractive.

Featured photo credit: Portrait of a young beautiful asian woman unhappy on trees background, vintage style via shutterstock.com

More by this author

What’s Wrong With My Relationship? Ask These 7 Questions To Know. These Mistranslations Can (Hilariously) Be A Vivid Description Of The Reality Science Says It’s More Than How You Look that Makes You Attractive

Trending in Communication

1 How to Develop Mutual Respect in a Relationship 2 If Money Can’t Buy Happiness, What Can? 3 Having an Emotional Breakdown? 15 Ways to Re-Center Yourself 4 10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts 5 What’s the Easiest Language to Learn for English Speakers?

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on September 17, 2019

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

Advertising

2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

Advertising

Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

Advertising

Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

Advertising

9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

More About Staying Positive

Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

Read Next