“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent” – Eleanor Roosevelt
I hate getting bad news, don’t you? You work so hard day in day out and some jerk comes along and ruins your day with a blast of his inconsiderate tongue. Maybe you’ve been demoted or worse you got your marching orders from a job that you love.
That’s rough for sure. But what’s important here is how you handle this let down. Are you confident enough to handle yourself with grace and come out on top?
Confident people deal with bad news in a very constructive way. Lets take a look at what you can do to confidently handle this sort of bad news.
1. Stand Up For Yourself
Don’t let anyone accuse you of something you didn’t do. Voice your opinion and do it with certainty.
Confident people aren’t afraid to defend themselves if they are accused in the wrong. They will find a way to address each situation in a a diplomatic way ensuring all parties involved are clear about their point of view.Advertising
Confident people never hide away in a corner and let a situation spiral out of their control. That said people who are confident are not afraid to be wrong and don’t mind admitting as much if this is the case.
2. Embrace Every Opportunity
Look for the opportunity, the diamond in the rough. It’s there if you look. If you’ve lost your job, maybe this is an opportunity to set up your own business.
Those who are sure of themselves will see opportunities arise from bad situations. They don’t let these opportunities pass them by. Instead they find small accomplishments within this opportunity and their confidence grows with each small step.
Never deterred, the confident person grabs onto life in a very powerful and impressive way and never looks back.
3. Take Action
Make that call, get researching those agencies. Buy a new diary and start making to-do lists. You are the creator of your own destiny now.
Have you every seen someone struggle to take action? They procrastinate and avoid. They hesitate and fumble. Anything to avoid taking action. This is down to a lack of confidence. The opposite is true of the confident person. They will embrace every opportunity with great gusto. They take control, research, plan, organize and take action.Advertising
They don’t fear the consequence of their actions as they are confident in their ability to do well. More importantly they’re confident in their ability to pick up the pieces should they not do well.
4. Remain Optimistic
Make a list of all the positives that have come out of this situation and write down how grateful you are for them. Do this every day.
In the face of bad news many people go through a period of self-pity. Unlike the average Joe, Mr.Confident will always feel positive about his situation no matter how terrible it may seem to others.
These kind of people will always see the silver lining and the glass will always be half full.
5. Stay Calm and Composed
Make some time for yourself when you can meditate, walk in nature or listen to inspiring music. This is a time for gentle reflection.
The confident person is not only very relaxed about their present problem whatever that may be, but they are also unmoved by the the outcome.Advertising
Under those conditions they are able to remain calm and composed – not worrying about the present or the future. In fact they don’t bother with worrying at all.
6. Treat Feedback Objectively
Thank all the people who have been supportive to you in this difficult time and simply ignore the rest.
The person who is sure of themselves doesn’t get all in a tizzy over someone else’s negative appraisal of them. If someone is justified in making those comments the confident person will admit the error of their ways – apologize even. But they will not entertain unwarranted accusations or comments.
For the confident person, happiness comes from themselves. They don’t need the approval of others to be content and productive. Instead they function just fine by reassuring themselves.
7. Remain Focused on What’s Important
Set one medium term goal and a few short term goals. Tick each one off as you achieve them – your confidence will grow each time.
Confident people have a clear vision of what’s possible and they know that this is within their reach. They don’t allow the opinions of others to taint their progress as they work towards their goal.Advertising
As a rule they keep their eye on each small victory they achieve, celebrating as they go. Each step is a step closer to their goal.
8. Let Go of Bad Feelings
Sit quietly for a few minutes and think of those who have wronged you. Make a resolution to forgive them and then focus on all of the good things that have come out of their actions.
The truly confident know that the only way that they can move forward productively is to let go of all ill feelings towards those who may have wronged them.
This takes strength of character and a willingness to forgive. This is also the healthiest way to handle receiving bad news of any kind. Let it go, so that you can grow.
Developing confidence is a process. It doesn’t happen overnight, but confidence is definitely not something that is set in stone.
Our life experiences since childhood and beyond shape and mould our levels of confidence to what they are today.
Volunteering for new experiences will help our confidence to grow no matter what age we are. The more exposure we get the more confident we will become.
Believe in yourself that you can do this and you’ll get off to a flying start.
Last Updated on February 18, 2019
Why It’s Never Too Late To Redefine Yourself
The ability to reinvent and redefine yourself is a bold, daring and purposeful choice. It doesn’t just happen. You have to make a conscious, intentional choice and then follow through.
If the thought of forging a new path, changing habits, thought patterns and your inner circle of friends scares you – you’re not alone. Change can be a very scary thing. It takes courage, fortitude and a bit of faith to decide to shed your old self and don a new persona. However, it is one of the most critical processes one must repeatedly endure in the pursuit of destiny. Change unlocks new levels of potential.
The Need for Change
Everyday when we wake up, we make a decision. We decide to follow our routine or we decide to go off script and shake things up a bit. For those who are creatures of habit, routine is comfortable, easy and produces very little stress. The problem with this is, after a while you stop growing.
We all reinvent ourselves at some point in our lives. It is absolutely necessary to achieve certain levels of success.
Reflect back on who you were as a teenager and then who you were at 25. Those are two very different people. Most of us are completely different. Your thought patterns changed, your appearance, job, level of education and even your friends– changed. We like to refer to this as “growing up” or maturing and consider it to be one of life’s natural progressions. However the changes you made were purposeful and deliberate.
This process must be a lifelong and continuous cycle. You are never too old to refresh yourself.
Signs It’s Time to Redefine
“Just as established products and brands need updating to stay alive and vibrant, you periodically need to refresh or reinvent yourself.”– Mireille Guiliano
So how do you know when it’s time for a system upgrade? There are signs along the way that alert you that it is time for an overhaul. The first sign is the feeling of being stuck. If you feel like you are in a rut, you’re bored with life or you need some newness and excitement, a self reinvention may be in order. Re-evaluate your life vision and your goals. Is that vision still valid and are your goals consistent with your vision and–are they achievable? If you are off course, it’s time for a change. If you are not moving forward and making progress, it’s time for a change.
In life, there’s no such thing as neutrality–you’re either moving forward or you are moving backward. Time constantly moves forward and if you are standing still, you are actually losing ground. No matter your age or stage in life– there is always room for improvement.
“You’re never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream.” ~C. S. Lewis
The second sign that you are due for a change is the occurrence of major life events in which change is forced upon you. Getting married, starting a new job, being promoted, ending a relationship, becoming a parenting or relocating are all prime opportunities to completely overhaul your life.
When these major shifts occur in your life–you have to shift with them. You can’t have a single mentality and have a successful marriage. You can’t remain selfish and irresponsible, and raise a healthy, well-adjusted child. You can’t be promoted to a supervisory position and keep the same subordinate attitude. Each level of success requires something different from you.
Consider, for a moment, Arnold Schwarzenegger. People may have different opinions about his character and some of his life choices, but he is a master at reinventing himself. He achieved the ultimate success as a professional body builder by earning the title “Mr. Universe” three times. He then earned a tremendous amount of fame and fortune in the entertainment industry making action/adventure films. And in his latest role, he served two terms as the Governor of California. He succeeded as a professional body builder, a film star and a politician. Each role required massive amounts of change, commitment, strength and hard work.
And if Arnold can do it…so can you!
Featured photo credit: BK via flickr.com