“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent” – Eleanor Roosevelt
I hate getting bad news, don’t you? You work so hard day in day out and some jerk comes along and ruins your day with a blast of his inconsiderate tongue. Maybe you’ve been demoted or worse you got your marching orders from a job that you love.
That’s rough for sure. But what’s important here is how you handle this let down. Are you confident enough to handle yourself with grace and come out on top?
Confident people deal with bad news in a very constructive way. Lets take a look at what you can do to confidently handle this sort of bad news.
1. Stand Up For Yourself
Don’t let anyone accuse you of something you didn’t do. Voice your opinion and do it with certainty.
Confident people aren’t afraid to defend themselves if they are accused in the wrong. They will find a way to address each situation in a a diplomatic way ensuring all parties involved are clear about their point of view.Advertising
Confident people never hide away in a corner and let a situation spiral out of their control. That said people who are confident are not afraid to be wrong and don’t mind admitting as much if this is the case.
2. Embrace Every Opportunity
Look for the opportunity, the diamond in the rough. It’s there if you look. If you’ve lost your job, maybe this is an opportunity to set up your own business.
Those who are sure of themselves will see opportunities arise from bad situations. They don’t let these opportunities pass them by. Instead they find small accomplishments within this opportunity and their confidence grows with each small step.
Never deterred, the confident person grabs onto life in a very powerful and impressive way and never looks back.
3. Take Action
Make that call, get researching those agencies. Buy a new diary and start making to-do lists. You are the creator of your own destiny now.
Have you every seen someone struggle to take action? They procrastinate and avoid. They hesitate and fumble. Anything to avoid taking action. This is down to a lack of confidence. The opposite is true of the confident person. They will embrace every opportunity with great gusto. They take control, research, plan, organize and take action.Advertising
They don’t fear the consequence of their actions as they are confident in their ability to do well. More importantly they’re confident in their ability to pick up the pieces should they not do well.
4. Remain Optimistic
Make a list of all the positives that have come out of this situation and write down how grateful you are for them. Do this every day.
In the face of bad news many people go through a period of self-pity. Unlike the average Joe, Mr.Confident will always feel positive about his situation no matter how terrible it may seem to others.
These kind of people will always see the silver lining and the glass will always be half full.
5. Stay Calm and Composed
Make some time for yourself when you can meditate, walk in nature or listen to inspiring music. This is a time for gentle reflection.
The confident person is not only very relaxed about their present problem whatever that may be, but they are also unmoved by the the outcome.Advertising
Under those conditions they are able to remain calm and composed – not worrying about the present or the future. In fact they don’t bother with worrying at all.
6. Treat Feedback Objectively
Thank all the people who have been supportive to you in this difficult time and simply ignore the rest.
The person who is sure of themselves doesn’t get all in a tizzy over someone else’s negative appraisal of them. If someone is justified in making those comments the confident person will admit the error of their ways – apologize even. But they will not entertain unwarranted accusations or comments.
For the confident person, happiness comes from themselves. They don’t need the approval of others to be content and productive. Instead they function just fine by reassuring themselves.
7. Remain Focused on What’s Important
Set one medium term goal and a few short term goals. Tick each one off as you achieve them – your confidence will grow each time.
Confident people have a clear vision of what’s possible and they know that this is within their reach. They don’t allow the opinions of others to taint their progress as they work towards their goal.Advertising
As a rule they keep their eye on each small victory they achieve, celebrating as they go. Each step is a step closer to their goal.
8. Let Go of Bad Feelings
Sit quietly for a few minutes and think of those who have wronged you. Make a resolution to forgive them and then focus on all of the good things that have come out of their actions.
The truly confident know that the only way that they can move forward productively is to let go of all ill feelings towards those who may have wronged them.
This takes strength of character and a willingness to forgive. This is also the healthiest way to handle receiving bad news of any kind. Let it go, so that you can grow.
Developing confidence is a process. It doesn’t happen overnight, but confidence is definitely not something that is set in stone.
Our life experiences since childhood and beyond shape and mould our levels of confidence to what they are today.
Volunteering for new experiences will help our confidence to grow no matter what age we are. The more exposure we get the more confident we will become.
Believe in yourself that you can do this and you’ll get off to a flying start.
Last Updated on December 3, 2019
10 Life Lessons You’d Better Learn Early on in Life
There are so many lessons I wish I had learned while I was young enough to appreciate and apply them. The thing with wisdom, and often with life lessons in general, is that they’re learned in retrospect, long after we needed them. The good news is that other people can benefit from our experiences and the lessons we’ve learned.
Here’re 10 important life lessons you should learn early on:
1. Money Will Never Solve Your Real Problems
Money is a tool; a commodity that buys you necessities and some nice “wants,” but it is not the panacea to your problems.
There are a great many people who are living on very little, yet have wonderfully full and happy lives… and there are sadly a great many people are living on quite a lot, yet have terribly miserable lives.
Money can buy a nice home, a great car, fabulous shoes, even a bit of security and some creature comforts, but it cannot fix a broken relationship, or cure loneliness, and the “happiness” it brings is only fleeting and not the kind that really and truly matters. Happiness is not for sale. If you’re expecting the “stuff” you can buy to “make it better,” you will never be happy.
2. Pace Yourself
Often when we’re young, just beginning our adult journey we feel as though we have to do everything at once. We need to decide everything, plan out our lives, experience everything, get to the top, find true love, figure out our life’s purpose, and do it all at the same time.
Slow down—don’t rush into things. Let your life unfold. Wait a bit to see where it takes you, and take time to weigh your options. Enjoy every bite of food, take time to look around you, let the other person finish their side of the conversation. Allow yourself time to think, to mull a bit.
Taking action is critical. Working towards your goals and making plans for the future is commendable and often very useful, but rushing full-speed ahead towards anything is a one-way ticket to burnout and a good way to miss your life as it passes you by.
3. You Can’t Please Everyone
“I don’t know the secret to success, but the secret to failure is trying to please everyone” – Bill Cosby.
You don’t need everyone to agree with you or even like you. It’s human nature to want to belong, to be liked, respected and valued, but not at the expense of your integrity and happiness. Other people cannot give you the validation you seek. That has to come from inside.
Speak up, stick to your guns, assert yourself when you need to, demand respect, stay true to your values.
4. Your Health Is Your Most Valuable Asset
Health is an invaluable treasure—always appreciate, nurture, and protect it. Good health is often wasted on the young before they have a chance to appreciate it for what it’s worth.
We tend to take our good health for granted, because it’s just there. We don’t have to worry about it, so we don’t really pay attention to it… until we have to.
Heart disease, bone density, stroke, many cancers—the list of many largely preventable diseases is long, so take care of your health now, or you’ll regret it later on.
5. You Don’t Always Get What You Want
“Life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.” – John Lennon
No matter how carefully you plan and how hard you work, sometimes things just don’t work out the way you want them to… and that’s okay.
We have all of these expectations; predetermined visions of what our “ideal” life will look like, but all too often, that’s not the reality of the life we end up with. Sometimes our dreams fail and sometimes we just change our minds mid-course. Sometimes we have to flop to find the right course and sometimes we just have to try a few things before we find the right direction.
6. It’s Not All About You
You are not the epicenter of the universe. It’s very difficult to view the world from a perspective outside of your own, since we are always so focused on what’s happening in our own lives. What do I have to do today? What will this mean for me, for my career, for my life? What do I want?
It’s normal to be intensely aware of everything that’s going on in your own life, but you need to pay as much attention to what’s happening around you, and how things affect other people in the world as you do to your own life. It helps to keep things in perspective.
7. There’s No Shame in Not Knowing
No one has it all figured out. Nobody has all the answers. There’s no shame in saying “I don’t know.” Pretending to be perfect doesn’t make you perfect. It just makes you neurotic to keep up the pretense of manufactured perfection.
We have this idea that there is some kind of stigma or shame in admitting our limitations or uncertainly, but we can’t possibly know everything. We all make mistakes and mess up occasionally. We learn as we go, that’s life.
Besides—nobody likes a know-it-all. A little vulnerability makes you human and oh so much more relatable.
8. Love Is More Than a Feeling; It’s a Choice
That burst of initial exhilaration, pulse quickening love and passion does not last long. But that doesn’t mean long-lasting love is not possible.
Love is not just a feeling; it’s a choice that you make every day. We have to choose to let annoyances pass, to forgive, to be kind, to respect, to support, to be faithful.
Relationships take work. Sometimes it’s easy and sometimes it’s incredibly hard. It is up to us to choose how we want to act, think and speak in a relationship.
9. Perspective Is a Beautiful Thing
Typically, when we’re worried or upset, it’s because we’ve lost perspective. Everything that is happening in our lives seems so big, so important, so do or die, but in the grand picture, this single hiccup often means next to nothing.
The fight we’re having, the job we didn’t get, the real or imagined slight, the unexpected need to shift course, the thing we wanted, but didn’t get. Most of it won’t matter 20, 30, 40 years from now. It’s hard to see long term when all you know is short term, but unless it’s life-threatening, let it go, and move on.
10. Don’t Take Anything for Granted
We often don’t appreciate what we have until it’s gone: that includes your health, your family and friends, your job, the money you have or think you will have tomorrow.
When you’re young, it seems that your parents will always be there, but they won’t. You think you have plenty of time to get back in touch with your old friends or spend time with new ones, but you don’t. You have the money to spend, or you think you’ll have it next month, but you might not.
Nothing in your life is not guaranteed to be there tomorrow, including those you love.
This is a hard life lesson to learn, but it may be the most important of all: Life can change in an instant. Make sure you appreciate what you have, while you still have it.
More Inspiring Lessons
- 25 Inspirational Movie Quotes About The Most Valuable Life Lessons
- Why a Life Without Pain Is the Guarantee to True Suffering
- 20 Things You’ll Regret Every Time After Doing
Featured photo credit: Ben Eaton via unsplash.com