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5 Surprising Things Would Happen When You Start To Take Control Of Your Sunday Sadness

5 Surprising Things Would Happen When You Start To Take Control Of Your Sunday Sadness

Sunday morning’s glorious sleepiness embraces you with the provocative aroma of fresh brewed coffee, pancakes shyly rising in their buttery pan and the delightful sizzling of bacon. The stage is set for a perfect Sunday, full of promise and never asking for anything in return. This wondrous moment is nothing less than pure joy.

Then 4 p.m. approaches and BOOM … your mood plummets and everything feels bleak and hopeless (a legit thing – ask the experts). But you have the power to dramatically turn your day around when you decide to take control of your Sundays.

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1. You’ll Create A Future Overflowing With Happy Sundays.

Choose to do your unpleasant chores or obligations on Saturday. This is when your energy and mood are naturally more positive. You will open Sunday up for unencumbered fun, when your psyche is most in need of it. Even better, accomplish those Sunday chores during the week. This will considerably free you up. Food shop online and have it delivered after work, do small loads of laundry here and there during the week, run your errands before or after work. If you have no choice but to do your chores on a Sunday, set a timer and do them and be done. Agonizing over what you have to do, interferes with your peace of mind and the quality of your Sunday.

2. You’ll Develop Skills Of A Forward Thinker.

On Friday, before the workday ends, plan your Monday schedule. Keep it as light and friendly as possible, gently reintroducing yourself to the beginning of the week. Who wrote the book on Mondays having to be a dreaded day? Rewrite that book. Changing a formed habit is sometimes all it takes to make a big difference, to make all the difference. Plan a treat for every Monday. Something to look forward to, something just for you. Make Mondays memorable.

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3. You’ll Discover The Ideal Day For Pampering.

Sunday is the perfect day to dedicate to showering yourself with love and attention. You’ve taken care of business during the week, today is your day. By the end of Sunday, you’ll be refreshed and more than ready and willing to take on the challenges of the week. When late afternoon arrives, it’s especially important to do something fun. Turn up some music and joyously dance around your house, call a funny/inspiring friend, watch a movie that motivates and inspires you. Anything that says fun to you.

4. You’ll Become A Master At Setting Yourself Up For A More Positive Week.

When you make the choice to have a positive attitude on Sunday afternoons, you feel empowered. Think about your Sunday routine and decide what it would take to disempower the Sunday blues. Maybe all it would take is writing your feelings down as soon as you begin feeling blue. Keep writing and do not stop until every last drop of negativity is out of your system. How about lending a hand to those who are in need, or join a fun group that meets on Sunday afternoons. When you choose to take the power back, this wonderful feeling spills over into the rest of your week. You are no longer a victim. You will perform better at work, be more relaxed and feel healthier.

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5. You’ll Be Able To Answer The Question “What Is My Purpose In Life”.

Once you do that, there’s no reason to feel sad on Sunday afternoon. Your life isn’t about the nine to five of Monday through Friday, it’s about something more meaningful. Setting up a life that you don’t need to escape from is your goal when the Sunday blues are threatening to overtake your night. Use this time wisely, determine what triggers this blue feeling and instead of sitting there dwelling, strategize. What is it that bothers you about Mondays? Do you work for an unbearable boss, is the traveling getting you down or do you just hate what you do? You are not getting the Sunday night blues because it’s the end of the weekend. You are getting the Sunday night blues, because you hate your job. This will not be solved in a day, but this is the ideal time to come up with realistic ways to solve this problem. Each Sunday, write down easy, achievable goals, and begin achieving them, slowly, steadily. The Sunday blues will melt away as you transform your life.

Featured photo credit: shutterstock_287858642 via media.lifehack.org

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Last Updated on October 14, 2020

The Art of Humble Confidence

The Art of Humble Confidence

To be confident or not to be confident, that is the question. I’m not sure about you, but I’ve been a bit confused about all this discussion about the subject of confidence. Do you really need to be more confident or should you try to be more humble? I think the answer is both – you just have to know where to use it.

East VS West – Confidence, It’s a Cultural Thing

In typical Western countries, the answer to the confidence debate is obvious – more is better. Our heros are rebellious, independent and shoot first, ask questions later. I think this snippet of dialog from The Matrix sums it up best:

Agent Smith – “We’re willing to wipe the slate clean, give you a fresh start. All that we’re asking in return is your cooperation in bringing a known terrorist to justice.”
Neo – “Yeah. Well, that sounds like a pretty good deal. But I think I may have a better one. How about, I give you the finger”
[He does]
Neo -“ …and you give me my phone call.”

In Eastern countries, the tone is often considerably different. Elders are supposed to be revered not dismissed. The words ‘guru,’ meaning a teacher, and the philosophy of dharma, loosely translated to mean ‘duty,’ come from here. In Eastern cultures humility and respect are more important than confidence.

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These perspectives are generalizations, but it shows how the confidence debate goes back deep into our culture. I think that both extremes of pure confidence or pure humility are misguided. Instead of rectifying this situation by simply blending the two: becoming somewhat humble, somewhat confident all the time, I believe the answer is to know when to be confident and when to be humble.

Humble Confidence – Know When to Use It

I’m going to make another broad generalization. I believe that virtually every relationship you are going to have is going to fit into one of two major archetypes, either master or student. In peer relationships this master/student role may switch frequently, but it is extremely rare that the relationship never leans to one side.

In the master role, you are displaying confidence to get what you want. This is public speaker, leader or seducer. Being the master has advantages. You have more control and ability to influence from this role.

The student role is the opposite. You are intentionally displaying humility. This is the student, disciple or follower. Being the student has advantages too. You can learn a lot more in this role and are more likely to win the trust of the other person.

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Know When to Shut Up and Learn

If you are a typical Westerner, you are probably already thinking about which role you prefer. Being the leader is great. You get respect and a higher status. Most of all you get a greater degree of control.

But the problem is that you can’t and shouldn’t always try to be the leader. Trying to assume that role without the skills, resources or status to back it up will lead to conflict. More importantly, there are many times when you purposely want to display humility. Some of the benefits to the student role include:

  • You learn more.
  • Smooths relationships.
  • Makes others more willing to lend a helping hand.

Knowing when taking the humble route is to your advantage. It is far easier to get mentors and advisors if you use humility rather than arrogance. A small sacrifice to your ego can open up the potential to learn a lot.

Confidence to Persuade, Humility to Learn

In reality almost no relationship is as clearly defined as master/student. Within our connections, people have overlapping areas of expertise. I might be an expert in blogging to a non-blogger, but they might be an expert in finance. In each area there are different roles to take.

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Before any interaction ask yourself what the purpose is. Are you trying to learn or persuade?

Persuasion requires confidence. If you are trying to sell, instruct or lead you need to display the confidence to match your message. But learning requires humility. You won’t learn anything if you are constantly arguing with your professors, mentors or employers. Taking a dose of humility and temporarily making yourself a student gives you the opportunity to absorb.

Persuade Less, Learn More

Persuasion is great for immediate effect, but learning matters over the long-haul. Instead of washing over all your communication with pure confidence, look for opportunities to learn. Persuading someone to follow you may give you an immediate boost of satisfaction, but it doesn’t last. Learning, however, is an investment for the future.

Whenever I make a connection with someone and realize they have a skill or understanding I want, I am careful to express humility in that area. That means listening with what they say even if I don’t immediately agree and being patient with their response. This method often drastically cuts down the time I need to spend on trial and error to learn by myself.

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Confidence/Humility Doesn’t Replace Communication Skills

This approach of selectively using confidence and humility for different purposes doesn’t replace communication skills. Humility isn’t going to work if the other person thinks you’re an irritating whiner. Confidence won’t work if the entire room thinks you are an arrogant jerk. Knowing how to display these two qualities takes practice.

The next time you are about to enter into an interaction ask yourself why you are doing it. Are you trying to persuade or learn? Depending on which you can take a completely different tact for far better results.

Featured photo credit: BBH Singapore via unsplash.com

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