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Why People Without A Heart To Compete Are The Rivals You Can’t Underestimate

Why People Without A Heart To Compete Are The Rivals You Can’t Underestimate

It’s an easy mistake to assume that competition in life is always healthy, but that is definitely not the case. The Harvard Business Review and other outlets have made strong cases against obsessing over competition in life. While it can sometimes be productive, too often it is actually destructive to your overall goals. That’s why people who don’t have as much of a heart to compete have advantages in life and the opportunity to be more successful. Keep reading for eight big reasons why those types of individuals are more motivated than most of the people around them.

1. They aren’t as ego-driven

People who compete often do so in large part to satisfy their egos. If you don’t have the heart to compete, then most likely you don’t have a big ego. That’s a huge advantage, saving you the time most people would waste trying to sate their large senses of bravado.

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2. They’re less stressed

Competition in life adds a lot of unneeded frustration. If you’re not obsessed with competing, you’re largely free of that stress. That frustration is an almost overwhelmingly negative influence on your sense of self. The stress takes a lot of energy away from your body, mind, and soul, so, if you’re retaining it, success is that much easier to get a hold of.

3. They hold less jealousy in their hearts

Someone who places number two is almost always envious of the person who receives the top prize. If you don’t have the heart to compete, you are probably less concerned with trivial matters such as that. That lack of jealously allows you to make decisions that are good for everyone, not for just for you.

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4. They wish success on others

The person who doesn’t obsess about competition often wants others to find success as well as themselves. What’s so great about that is how success begets success. With good karma, you get to attain the awards of competing, and more, without needing that harmful sense of intense competition in life.

5. They believe success can be shared

Competitions are almost always win-lose situations. People who don’t want competition in their lives tend to believe in win-win scenarios. Instead of looking for ways they can outsmart their opponent, they search for methods to team up with them and overcome whatever obstacle that they face together instead of apart. By doing that, they double the chance for success

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6. They’re calmer

A sense of calm comes over those who don’t endlessly think about how they’re going to get ahead in races of all kinds. If they don’t know already, those who don’t need as much competition in life should learn how to start meditating, because they’re the perfect candidates for attaining spiritual enlightenment due to their lack of a competitive edge.

7. They innovate

Those who compete tend to look for the ways to do already existing things the best. Those who don’t dwell on competition in life, on the other hand, consider new ways to go about things. Without that desire to “win,” the non-competitive devise ways to make everybody a victor.

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8. They have inner peace

Obsession is unhealthy, whereas peace is just around the corner once you remove competition from the equation. By focusing on improving yourself instead of beating others, you are well on your way to the inner peace everyone craves, even if some of them don’t know it. That hunger to win by those who compete is usually an emptiness in their hearts that they need to fill. Unbeknownst to them, the real way to fill it is to live and let live, removing as much competition from life as they can.

Featured photo credit: Pressmaster via shutterstock.com

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Matt OKeefe

Matt is a marketer and writer who shares about lifestyle and productivity tips on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on October 17, 2019

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

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1. Recognize the Signs

If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

Some telltale signs include:

  • You’re always on your phones.
  • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
  • You aren’t together during important events.
  • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
  • You don’t make plans or date nights.
  • You’re not happy.

If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

2. Try New Things Together

Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

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Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

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5. Cook Meals Together

Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

6. Have a Regular Date Night

Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

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Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

  • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
  • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
  • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
  • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
  • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
  • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
  • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

Final Thoughts

The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

  • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
  • Lowers divorce rates
  • Improves communication
  • Reduces marital boredom
  • Bonds couples closer
  • Improves friendship
  • Boosts health
  • Reduces stress

These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

Reference

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