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6 Things Will Happen When You Start Bouncing Back From A Heartbreak

6 Things Will Happen When You Start Bouncing Back From A Heartbreak

When you end a long term relationship the fallout can be devastating. You are forced to change every aspect of your life. From something as simple as changing the place you get your coffee to heavier things like moving out of a neighborhood you like, losing friends you have had for a long time and basically starting over as a single person. When you are used to acting as a unit with someone and overnight you become single, it is tough to bounce back.

With time you heal and as you start bouncing from the heartbreak, these amazing things will happen to you:

1. You become happier than you have been in a long time .

Sometimes when you get caught up in a relationship you don’t realize when it stops making you happy. You don’t over analyze things because deep down you know that the relationship is no longer fulfilling. Eventually when it cannot be ignored any more and you have to split ways the pain can be unbearable.

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However something happens to you when you are not in the relationship anymore. When you start bouncing back from the heartbreak you start to see things as they are. You stop making excuses. When you have gone through the angry phase you wake up one day and you realize you have moved on and you are happier than you have been in a long time. Why? Because you are finally free of something you did not even know was making you unhappy.

2. You have hope that there is something better in your future.

When you leave the past behind and you heal from the heartbreak you realize something has changed about you. You have hope. You are hopeful that the future that seemed so bleak has so much potential now. You have learnt your lessons and you are wiser now. You know you will make better choices for your future which gives you hope that something better is coming.

A person who is hopeful is easy to spot. They are excited about life and there is a confidence about them you can’t explain. When you start bouncing back from a heartbreak you can’t help but be hopeful that good things are coming your way. It cannot get worse, it can only get better.

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3. You get stronger.

Heartbreak forces a person to go into survivor mode. You dig deep to appear normal. Just because your personal life feels like it ended doesn’t mean that you don’t get to get up, dress up and show up for your responsibilities every day. You will notice that as you are bouncing back you are tougher than you were before.

Things that would have elevated your stress levels before are easier to handle. Hard times build character and a heartbreak is right up there when it comes to dealing with difficult situations.

4. You become wiser.

Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me! Once you start bouncing back you are smarter with your feelings. You are more picky with the time you invest in people. You can now spot the signs faster and with more ease. After a few conversations with someone you can differentiate between someone who is wasting your time and someone who might be worth more exploration.

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As you bounce back from a heartbreak you realize that you don’t fall for the same lies as you did before. Experience is the best teacher when it comes to matters of the heart and you have been there and you are not willing to go back knowingly. You are more careful with the people you trust.

5. You become more independent.

When you bounce back from heartbreak not only does it make you stronger it makes you realize you don’t need people. This is not necessarily a bad thing. A broken relationship can often force mutual friends to pick sides which causes even more heartbreak. People you expected to be there for you are no longer dependable.

This is one of the hardest things a person can go through. It forces you to rely on yourself. But you also become more open to the possibility of forming new relationships, which can be tough. However before all of this happens you first go through the process of developing the strength to stand on your own two feet.

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6. You choose your circle more cautiously.

The people you surround yourself with become so important as you bounce back from a heartbreak. You not only become closer to the people who give you the most support but you also choose your support system more cautiously. Your circle will become smaller as you deal with a heartbreak because you can now easily spot the people who were there for you when things got tough.

As you start bouncing back you will find yourself reaching out to specific people because they are trustworthy and you know they will be there when you need them the most.

Featured photo credit: Kelly by JohnONolan via imcreator.com

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Last Updated on October 14, 2020

Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

Today didn’t turn out as you planned, but it doesn’t mean you’re weak. It simply means that you’re human, and you’re not bad just because you had a bad day.

“Not everyday is a good day but there is something good in every day.” -Alice Morse Earle

It’s not the end of the world when you find yourself thinking “I had a bad day,” but it can feel like it. You may have had plans that fell apart, experiences that set you back, and interactions that only did harm.

You may have started the day thinking you could take on it all, only to find you could hardly get out of bed. When you have a bad day, you can forget to look at the good.

Sometimes, self-care helps us to remember why we are worth it. It helps us to recharge and reset our mindset. It helps us to know that there are still options and that the day isn’t over yet.

Love yourself today, no matter how hard it’s been. That’s the way to find yourself amidst the hardships you have. That’s how you center yourself and regain focus and live a more meaningful life. Give yourself some credit and compassion.

Here are 7 ways to rebound from a bad day using self-compassion as a tool. If you had a bad day, these are for you!

1. Make a Gratitude List

In a study on gratitude, psychologists Dr. Robert A Emmons and Dr. Michael E. McCullough conducted an experiment where one group of people wrote out gratitude lists for ten weeks while another group wrote about irritations. The study found that the group that wrote about gratitude reported more optimistic mindsets in their lives[1].

Overall, having a gratitude list improved well-being and made one truly grateful by counting the blessings in their lives.

Write a list of what you are grateful for if you had a bad day. Make it as long as you like, but also remember to note why you’re grateful for each thing you write.

What has given you the most joy? What has set you up for better days? Keep a tally of triumphs in mind, especially when you do have the bad days.

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The day doesn’t define you, and you still have things of value that surround you. These could be material things, spiritual connections and experiences, relationships, basic needs, emotional and mental well-being, physical health, progress towards hopes and dreams, or simply being alive.

Here are some other simple ways to practice gratitude.

2. Write in a Journal

Journaling affects your overall mental health, which also affects physical health and aids in the management of stress, depression, anxiety, and more[2].

All you need is a pen and paper, or you could do an online, password-protected journal such as Penzu. The key is to get started and not pressure yourself on how polished or perfect it is. You don’t need to have prior experience to start journal writing. Just start.

Write out everything that is bothering you for 15 minutes. This helps with rumination, processing problems, and can even aid with brainstorming solutions.

However you approach it, you can find patterns of thinking that no longer serve you and start to transform your overall mental state. This will impact all areas of your life and is a great coping skill.

3. Meditate

Meditation can help you overcome negative thought patterns, worrying about the future, dwelling on the past, or struggling to overcome a bad day[3]. It shifts your mentality and helps you focus on the present or any one thing you truly want to focus on.

Here is an example of a meditation you can do:

Get into a comfortable position. Close your eyes. Rest your body, release tension, and unclench your jaw. Tighten and release each muscle group in a body scan for progressive muscle relaxation.

Focus on your breath, taking a few deep breaths. Let your belly expand when you breathe in for diaphragmatic breathing. Empty yourself completely of air, then return to normal breathing.

Next, focus on the idea of self-love and let it erase negative thoughts. Think about the ways you’ve been judging yourself, with the narratives coming up that your mind may create.

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Give yourself unconditional love and release judgment. Take your time meditating on this because you matter. This is particularly important if you had a bad day.

Check out this article for more on how to get started with a meditation practice.

4. Do Child’s Pose

Yoga Outlet says:

“Child’s Pose is a simple way to calm your mind, slow your breath, and restore a feeling of peace and safety. Practicing the pose before bedtime can help to release the worries of the day. Practicing in the morning can you help transition from sleeping to waking.”[4]

When you do Child’s Pose, it can be between difficult positions in yoga, or it can be anytime you feel you need a rest. It helps you recover from difficulties and relax the mind.

It also has the physical health benefits of elongating your back, opening your hips, and helping with digestion[5].

To do Child’s Pose, rest your buttocks back on your feet, knees on the floor. Elongate your body over your knees with both arms extended or tucked back, with head and neck resting on the floor[6].

Had a bad day? Try Child's Pose.

     

    Do this pose as a gift to yourself. You are allowing yourself to heal, rest, get time for yourself, recover, and recharge. When you’ve had a bad day, it’s there waiting for you.

    5. Try Positive Self-Talk

    Engage in positive self-talk. This is essentially choosing your thoughts.

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    When you have a negative thought, such as “I can’t do this,” replace it consciously with the thought “I can do this.” Give yourself positive affirmations to help with this.

    Negative self-talk fits into four general categories: personalizing or blaming yourself, magnifying or only focusing on the negative, catastrophizing or expecting the worst to happen, and polarizing or only seeing back and white[7].

    When you stop blaming yourself for everything and start focusing on the positive, expecting things to work out, and seeing the areas of grey in life, you reverse these negative mindsets and engage in positive self-talk.

    When you speak words of kindness to yourself, your brain responds with a more positive attitude. That attitude will affect everything you do. It’s how you take care of yourself if you had a bad day.

    Check in with yourself to know when you are having negative self-talk. Are you seeing patterns? When did they start to become a problem? Are you able to turn these thoughts around?

    6. Use Coping Skills and Take a Break

    Use your coping skills. This means not letting your thoughts take control of yourself.

    You can distract yourself and escape a bit. Do things you love. You can exercise, listen to music, dance, volunteer or help someone, be in nature, or read a book.

    It isn’t about repression. It’s about redirection. You can’t stay in thoughts that are no longer working for you.

    Sometimes, it’s okay to get out of your own way. Give yourself a break from the things going on in your head. You can always come back to a problem later. This may even help you figure out the best course of action as sometimes stepping away is the only way to see the solution.

    If you had a bad day, you may not feel like addressing what went wrong. You may need a break, so take one.

    7. If a Bad Day Turns Into Bad Days

    “I believe depression is legitimate. But I also believe that if you don’t exercise, eat nutritious food, get sunlight, get enough sleep, consume positive material, surround yourself with support, then you aren’t giving yourself a fighting chance.” –Jim Carrey

    If you’ve been feeling out of control, depressed, or unstable for more than a few weeks, it’s time to call a mental health professional. This is not because you have failed in any way. It’s because you are human, and you simply need help.

    You may not be able to quickly rebound from a bad day, and that’s fine. Feel what you feel, but don’t let it consume you.

    When you talk to a professional, share the techniques that you have already tried here and whether they were helpful. They may tell you additional ideas or gain insights from your struggles of not being able to rebound from a series of bad days.

    If you’re having more than just a bad day, they will want to know. If you don’t have the answers, that’s okay, too. You just need to try these tools and figure out how you’re feeling. That’s all that’s required of you.

    Keep taking care of yourself. Any progress is progress, no matter how small. Give yourself a chance to get better by reaching out.

    Final Thoughts

    If you had a bad day, don’t let it stop you.

    Know this: It’s okay not to be okay. You have a right to feel what you feel. But there is something you can do about it.

    You can invest in yourself via self-care.

    You are not alone in this. Everyone has bad days from time to time. You just need to know that you are the positive things you tell yourself.

    More Things You Can Do If You Had a Bad Day

    Featured photo credit: Anthony Tran via unsplash.com

    Reference

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