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You’re A Great Parent Though You Don’t Even Know It

You’re A Great Parent Though You Don’t Even Know It

It’s 2 in the morning. Your newborn baby is crying, and you can’t seem to console your child in any way. You are tired, exhausted, and are about to hit your breaking point. All of these negative thoughts are running through your head. “You are a terrible parent”, “Something is wrong with the baby”, and, of course,”You aren’t doing any of this right”.

Every parent has been in this situation, especially new parents. Parenthood introduces all sorts of challenges that you would never think you would have to face. With all of these challenges, it can be hard to see that you are doing anything right, especially when you are dealing with a screaming kid.

Being a parent is no doubt one of the hardest things that most people will do in their lives, but it is so rewarding. And you are doing a great job at it, even though you may not always think so, and heres a few things that you may do, or feel that show you that you are a good parent.

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You are stressed about everything.

And that is because you care a whole helluva lot. If you didn’t care, you probably wouldn’t stress.

You take charge.

This doesn’t make you overly bossy, or too strict, it makes you a good, responsible parent. Kids need to have limits, and if you don’t take the reigns then you are doing them an injustice.

You give your kids responsibility.

Kids need to have some sort of responsibility, especially when they are younger. They need to learn that they can’t always rely on some one for everything.

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You let them take charge in activities.

Giving kids an opportunity to pick the game, and to make the rules every once in a while. It makes kids feel good to be able to be a leader, and that sticks with them.

You set a good example.

Kids absorb things like they are sponges. Everything you do, or say around them, they take that in. Being respectful towards people is a key example. If your kids see you showing disrespect to someone that may have ticked you off in traffic will say that its okay for them to act like that as well.

You don’t belittle your partner’s parental decisions.

You two are a team, and if you go behind their back on decisions they make regarding your kids, it just tells them that certain rules don’t apply, and that they may not have to listen to them.

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You know how to admit when you are wrong to your kids.

If you tell your kids that they need to do something “because you said so”, and you later realize that that wasn’t such a good thing to do at the time, it doesn’t make you a bad parent. Everybody makes mistakes, and by admitting that you were wrong to your kids teaches them just that.

You let your kids cry themselves to sleep as a baby.

This does not make you a bad person at all. It actually helps your kids learn to calm themselves down and to get themselves to fall asleep, without having to depend on you to do it. It will also help them sleep longer, especially when they are babies who have trouble sleeping through the night.

You like to have some alone time.

This is perfectly normal for a parent. Kids can be super overwhelming, especially when they are young. Let them spend some time at grandmas house, or leave them with your partner, and go out by yourself, or with friends every so often. You need that break to make yourself feel better and to be the best parent you can be.

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Featured photo credit: https://pixabay.com/en/users/White77-185772/ via pixabay.com

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Michael Daws

Aircraft Painter, Sports & Lifestyle Blogger

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Last Updated on March 5, 2021

Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses

Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses

I talk a lot to myself. It helps me to keep my concentration on the activity on hand, makes me focus more on my studies, and gives me some pretty brilliant ideas while chattering to myself; more importantly, I produce better works. For example, right now, as I am typing, I am constantly mumbling to myself. Do you talk to yourself? Don’t get embarrassed admitting it because science has discovered that those who talk to themselves are actually geniuses… and not crazy!

Research Background

Psychologist-researcher Gary Lupyan conducted an experiment where 20 volunteers were shown objects, in a supermarket, and were asked to remember them. Half of them were told to repeat the objects, for example, banana, and the other half remained silent. In the end, the result shown that self-directed speech aided people to find the objects faster, by 50 to 100 milliseconds, compared to the silent ones.

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“I’ll often mutter to myself when searching for something in the refrigerator or the supermarket shelves,” said Gary Lupyan.

This personal experience actually made him conduct this experiment. Lupyan, together with another psychologist, Daniel Swigley, came up with the outcomes that those to talk to oneself are geniuses. Here are the reasons:

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It stimulates your memory

When you are talking to yourself, your sensory mechanism gets activated. It gets easier on your memory since you can visualize the word, and you can act accordingly.[1]

It helps stay focused

When you are saying it loud, you stay focused on your task,[2] and it helps you recognise that stuff immediately. Of course, this only helps if you know what the object you are searching looks like. For example, a banana is yellow in colour, and you know how a banana looks like. So when you are saying it loud, your brain immediately pictures the image on your mind. But if you don’t know what banana looks like, then there is no effect of saying it loud.

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It helps you clarify your thoughts

Every one of us tends to have various types of thoughts. Most make sense, while the others don’t. Suppose you are furious at someone and you feel like killing that person. Now for this issue you won’t run to a therapist, will you? No, what you do is lock yourself in a room and mutter to yourself. You are letting go off the anger by talking to yourself, the pros and cons of killing that person, and eventually you calm down. This is a silly thought that you have and are unable to share it with any other person. Psychologist Linda Sapadin said,[3]

“It helps you clarify your thoughts, tend to what’s important and firm up any decisions you are contemplating.”

Featured photo credit: Girl Using Laptop In Hotel Room/Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

Reference

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