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You’re A Great Parent Though You Don’t Even Know It

You’re A Great Parent Though You Don’t Even Know It

It’s 2 in the morning. Your newborn baby is crying, and you can’t seem to console your child in any way. You are tired, exhausted, and are about to hit your breaking point. All of these negative thoughts are running through your head. “You are a terrible parent”, “Something is wrong with the baby”, and, of course,”You aren’t doing any of this right”.

Every parent has been in this situation, especially new parents. Parenthood introduces all sorts of challenges that you would never think you would have to face. With all of these challenges, it can be hard to see that you are doing anything right, especially when you are dealing with a screaming kid.

Being a parent is no doubt one of the hardest things that most people will do in their lives, but it is so rewarding. And you are doing a great job at it, even though you may not always think so, and heres a few things that you may do, or feel that show you that you are a good parent.

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You are stressed about everything.

And that is because you care a whole helluva lot. If you didn’t care, you probably wouldn’t stress.

You take charge.

This doesn’t make you overly bossy, or too strict, it makes you a good, responsible parent. Kids need to have limits, and if you don’t take the reigns then you are doing them an injustice.

You give your kids responsibility.

Kids need to have some sort of responsibility, especially when they are younger. They need to learn that they can’t always rely on some one for everything.

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You let them take charge in activities.

Giving kids an opportunity to pick the game, and to make the rules every once in a while. It makes kids feel good to be able to be a leader, and that sticks with them.

You set a good example.

Kids absorb things like they are sponges. Everything you do, or say around them, they take that in. Being respectful towards people is a key example. If your kids see you showing disrespect to someone that may have ticked you off in traffic will say that its okay for them to act like that as well.

You don’t belittle your partner’s parental decisions.

You two are a team, and if you go behind their back on decisions they make regarding your kids, it just tells them that certain rules don’t apply, and that they may not have to listen to them.

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You know how to admit when you are wrong to your kids.

If you tell your kids that they need to do something “because you said so”, and you later realize that that wasn’t such a good thing to do at the time, it doesn’t make you a bad parent. Everybody makes mistakes, and by admitting that you were wrong to your kids teaches them just that.

You let your kids cry themselves to sleep as a baby.

This does not make you a bad person at all. It actually helps your kids learn to calm themselves down and to get themselves to fall asleep, without having to depend on you to do it. It will also help them sleep longer, especially when they are babies who have trouble sleeping through the night.

You like to have some alone time.

This is perfectly normal for a parent. Kids can be super overwhelming, especially when they are young. Let them spend some time at grandmas house, or leave them with your partner, and go out by yourself, or with friends every so often. You need that break to make yourself feel better and to be the best parent you can be.

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Featured photo credit: https://pixabay.com/en/users/White77-185772/ via pixabay.com

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Michael Daws

Aircraft Painter, Sports & Lifestyle Blogger

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Last Updated on July 16, 2019

7 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Energy and Become Positive

7 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Energy and Become Positive

Negativity affects ourselves and everyone around us. It limits our potential to become something great and live a fulfilling, purposeful life. Negativity has a tangible effect on our health, too. Research has shown that people who cultivate negative energy experience more stress, more sickness, and less opportunity over the course of their lives than those who choose to live positively.

When we make a decision to become positive, and follow that decision up with action, we will begin to encounter situations and people that are also positive. The negative energy gets edged out by all positive experiences. It’s a snowball effect.

Although negative and positive thoughts will always exist, the key to becoming positive is to limit the amount of negativity that we experience by filling ourselves up with more positivity.

Here are some ways to get rid of negativity and become more positive.

1. Become Grateful for Everything

When life is all about us, it’s easy to believe that we deserve what we have. An attitude of entitlement puts us at the center of the universe and sets up the unrealistic expectation that others should cater to us, our needs, and our wants. This vain state of existence is a surefire way to set yourself up for an unfulfilled life of negativity.

People living in this sort of entitlement are “energy suckers”–they are always searching for what they can get out of a situation. People that don’t appreciate the nuances of their lives live in a constant state of lacking. And it’s really difficult to live a positive life this way.

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When we begin to be grateful and appreciate everything in our lives–from the small struggles that make us better, to the car that gets us from A to B every day–we shift our attitude from one of selfishness, to one of appreciation. This appreciation gets noticed by others, and a positive harmony begins to form in our relationships.

We begin to receive more of that which we are grateful for, because we’ve opened ourselves up to the idea of receiving, instead of taking. This will make your life more fulfilling, and more positive.

2. Laugh More, Especially at Yourself

Life gets busy, our schedules fill up, we get into relationships, and work can feel task oriented and routine-driven at times. Being human can feel more like being a robot. But having this work-driven, serious attitude often results in negative and performance oriented thinking.

Becoming positive means taking life less seriously and letting yourself off the hook. This is the only life that you get to live, why not lighten up your mood?

Laughter helps us become positive by lightening our mood and reminding us not to take life so seriously. Are you sensitive to light sarcasm? Do you have trouble laughing at jokes? Usually, people who are stressed out and overly serious get most offended by sarcasm because their life is all work and no play.

If we can learn to laugh at ourselves and our mistakes, life will become more of an experiment in finding out what makes us happy. And finding happiness means finding positivity.

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3. Help Others

Negativity goes hand in hand with selfishness. People that live only for themselves have no higher purpose in their lives. If the whole point of this world is only to take care of yourself and no one else, the road to a long-term fulfillment and purpose is going to be a long one.

Positivity accompanies purpose. The most basic way to create purpose and positivity in your life is to begin doing things for others. Start small; open the door for the person in front of you at Starbucks or ask someone how their day was before telling them about yours.

Helping others will give you an intangible sense of value that will translate into positivity. And people might just appreciate you in the process.

4. Change Your Thinking

We can either be our best coach or our best enemy. Change starts from within. If you want to become more positive, change the wording of your thoughts. We are the hardest on ourselves, and a stream of negative self talk is corrosive to a positive life.

The next time you have a negative thought, write it down and rephrase it with a positive spin. For example, change a thought like, “I can’t believe I did so horribly on the test–I suck.” to “I didn’t do as well as I hoped to on this test. But I know I’m capable and I’ll do better next time.”

Changing our self-talk is powerful.

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5. Surround Yourself with Positive People

We become most like the people that we surround ourselves with. If our friend group is full of negative energy-suckers and drama queens, we will emulate that behavior and become like them. It is very difficult to become more positive when the people around us don’t support or demonstrate positive behavior.

As you become more positive, you’ll find that your existing friends will either appreciate the new you or they will become resistant to your positive changes. This is a natural response.

Change is scary; but cutting out the negative people in your life is a huge step to becoming more positive. Positive people reflect and bounce their perspectives onto one another. Positivity is a step-by-step process when you do it solo, but a positive group of friends can be an escalator.

6. Get into Action

Negative thoughts can be overwhelming and challenging to navigate. Negativity is usually accompanied by a “freak-out” response, especially when tied to relationships, people and to worrying about the future. This is debilitating to becoming positive and usually snowballs into more worry, more stress and more freak-outs.

Turn the negative stress into positive action. The next time you’re in one of these situations, walk away and take a break. With your eyes closed, take a few deep breaths. Once you’re calm, approach the situation or problem with a pen and pad of paper. Write out four or five actions or solutions to begin solving the problem.

Taking yourself out of the emotionally charged negative by moving into the action-oriented positive will help you solve more problems rationally and live in positivity

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7. Take Full Responsibility, Stop Being the Victim

You are responsible for your thoughts.

People that consistently believe that things happen to them handicap themselves to a victim mentality. This is a subtle and deceptive negative thought pattern. Phrases like “I have to work” or “I can’t believe he did that to me” are indicators of a victim mentality. Blaming circumstances and blaming others only handicaps our decision to change something negative into something positive.

Taking full responsibility for your life, your thoughts and your actions is one of the biggest steps in creating a more positive life. We have unlimited potential within to create our own reality, change our life, and change our thoughts. When we begin to really internalize this, we discover that no one can make us feel or do anything. We choose our emotional and behavioral response to people and circumstances.

Make positive choices in favor of yourself.

“Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habit. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny” ― Lao Tzu

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Featured photo credit: Brooke Cagle via unsplash.com

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