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This Is What Will Happen When You Start Putting Down Your Phone More

This Is What Will Happen When You Start Putting Down Your Phone More

I have long been interested in the problems associated with excessive smartphone use because we live in a time when our lives are dominated by technology. Smartphones (as well as laptops and tablets) seem to dictate our lives now.

Take a look around in public. Everyone seems to be glued to their smartphones everywhere you look. Many people have forgotten what it feels like to simply be a person and live life in the present.

Back in August 2013, I did an experiment. I turned my smartphone off for one month. That’s right. For one entire month, I was without a smartphone. There was no texting, no phone calls, no mindless internet browsing, no anxiously checking my e-mail every two minutes, and no social media.

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I know what happens when you start putting your smartphone down and I’m happy to share the benefits with you. Here they are:

1. You will initiate small talk on a more consistent basis.

Stand in a line at any place or event with a decent wait time. What do you usually see? You usually see a line of people just standing there mindlessly staring down at their smartphones. They are oblivious to the world around them. They have little awareness of their surroundings. Their only focus is whatever is on that smartphone screen.

This really is a shame because when you think about it, you have to wonder about all the missed opportunities. Who knows what kind of friendships or relationships could be started just by putting your phone away and engaging in simple small talk?

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You will know if you decide to put the phone away and pay attention to your immediate surroundings. You will have no other choice. Without a smartphone, life is boring if you just stand around and don’t talk to people. Without a smartphone to rely upon for ‘entertainment’, you will place evolutionary pressure on yourself to start making small talk with strangers. From there, the possibilities are endless.

2. You will become more observant.

When you allow yourself to be dominated by constant smartphone use, life follows one big pattern. You tend to do the same thing over and over throughout the week. You get up. You go to work. You talk with the same people every day. You go to lunch. You leave work. Maybe you go to the gym or take a class. And then you go to bed and do it all over again. This is reality for many people, especially those who are constantly on their smartphones throughout the day. You don’t really remember the details about your day. You don’t really remember specific people that you come across. It’s all one big blur.

This will change once you start putting your phone down more. Again, you will not be able to rely upon your smartphone as a means of numbing yourself from the rigors of your daily routine. You will be forced to actually look around and gain a deeper understanding of life around you. You will become more observant of people. You will also become more observant of the social situations developing in front of your eyes.

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3. You will give yourself a chance to reset your dopamine levels to “normal”.

It’s very common for people to say that we are “addicted to our smartphones.” But what does this really mean and is this accurate? It’s somewhat true. It’s not so much that we are addicted to our smartphones. In reality, we are addicted to dopamine, the “pleasure chemical” that is released in our brains as a reward mechanism. Simply put, we live in a society where constant access to technology and instant gratification at our fingertips has our collective dopamine levels way out of whack.

Recent research indicates that dopamine causes “seeking behavior.” Our brains are always seeking stimulation- hence, why we are a “click happy generation.” How many times have you found yourself searching on Google or YouTube for something specific only to end up looking at something totally unrelated an hour later. We’ve all been there.

When you make it a habit to put down your phone, you will start to alleviate this extreme seeking behavior. Eliminating the constant clicking, searching, and communicating will enable you to give yourself a chance to reset your dopamine levels to their normal range.

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4. You will relax and be in a good mood more often.

Constant smartphone use throughout the day can take its toll on you. This is especially the case if you make it a long term habit. Constantly looking at a small screen and mindlessly clicking away wears down your brain. Again, this relates back to abnormal stimulation and dopamine release. This habit, that so many of us engage in, adds another element of stress to our lives that is simply unnecessary.

The world is stressful enough. People have jobs. People have personal lives. Stress is inevitable. There is no reason to add to it. Yet, this is exactly what many of us unknowingly do when we do something like check our e-mail inbox ten times just on the elevator ride up to the office.

When you eliminate, or at least drastically cut down on this habit, you give yourself a chance to relax. Suddenly, life doesn’t seem to be moving so fast. There is time to fully enjoy something as simple as going to the grocery store. When you are able to put your phone down and relax, you will give yourself the opportunity to be in a good mood.

Featured photo credit: Pabak Sarkar via flickr.com

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Last Updated on August 10, 2020

10 Principles for Success to Live Your Dream Life

10 Principles for Success to Live Your Dream Life

Are you stressed out and overwhelmed, wishing you had more time to do the things that really matter? Are you ready to do something better, something special in your life or your career?

If you’re ready to do what you want in life, then the 10 principles of success are what you need to follow.

You were born with a gift that no one else in the world can express like you. When you dance to your own music, you naturally develop your innate abilities and excel in work and life. You are a total rock star. But when you live someone else’s idea of who you should be, it throws off your groove.

Many people—maybe you—stopped following their dreams way too early in life because their talents were ignored, minimized, or shamed. They didn’t have the chops to win an American Idol competition or nab an Olympic gold medal, so they stopped expressing their inborn gifts altogether.

You don’t need to be an award winner to rock your life. Living your dream life is about discovering your superpowers and feeling vibrant and joyful when you use them. It’s about owning what makes you unique and finding like-minded people to support you.

Here are 10 success principles to help you live a rich and rewarding life on your terms that have worked with thousands of people in my workshops and will work for you, too.

1. Get a Hobby to Move Closer to Your Dreams

If you never became a professional dancer or a world-renowned author, it does NOT mean you should stop dancing or writing! These activities make you come alive, even if you “only” do them as favorite pastimes.

Engaging in a hobby is one of the most important success principles you can follow to move closer to your dreams.

When you try something creative for the first time or in a long while, you begin to see opportunities at work and in life that you were unaware of before. You also feel happier and more energized, according to a recent study from New Zealand.[1]

Some of my most burned-out executive clients reinvigorated their careers by discovering a creative outlet that refueled them after the workday ended. Research at San Francisco State University shows that having a hobby lowers stress and helps you succeed at work.[2]

So, give yourself permission to try new things and revisit old passions you gave up long ago. Setting aside just one hour a week for personal exploration can significantly change your life.

Who knows? Your creative outlet could transform into a thriving business or lead to a new profession down the road.

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2. Focus on Your Strengths, Not Your Weaknesses

Did you know that you are more likely to succeed when you develop your natural strengths rather than work on your weaknesses? The problem is that you probably don’t know where your true talents lie.

Here are a few options to help you discover your unique strengths. You can:

  • Take the VIA Character Strengths Survey[3]
  • Try Gallup’s CliftonStrengths Assessment[4]
  • Answer a few Superpower Questions

Once you understand what makes you tick, you can use these skills at work and your personal life to get more done in less time. If you boost your unique abilities through practice and study, you can accelerate your career and become a leader in a field that matters to you. It’s worth investing in yourself this way.

3. Jumping off a Cliff is NOT Required

Here’s the deal: most people are too afraid to change. When participants first come to my workshops, they tell me they have mouths to feed, bills to pay, and fear that if they follow their dreams, someone will get hurt.

The old saying “leap and the net shall appear” does not comfort them. Because they are hesitant to plunge into the unknown, they believe their only option is to stay put where they are in life. Can you relate?

You do not have to sacrifice the life you have now to start a new one. I was a psychology professor by day and singer by night for years before I transitioned into a full-time music career.

Just take a little time out each week to do what enlivens you through a hobby, volunteer work, etc. Get a feel for it.

Is it what you really want? If so, increase the time you spend doing it and make the transition when the time feels right.

4. Give Your Inner Critic Some Love

The main culprit that keeps you from stepping outside your comfort zone and getting the life of your dreams is KCRP or K-CRAP – the radio station that plays 24/7 in your head. The moment you try to do something interesting with your life it slaps you down with such chart-topping killer hooks as “Who do you think you are?” and “You’ll never be good enough!”.

Have you ever noticed that KCRP’s mean-spirited DJ sounds like your parents, teachers, bosses, and other authority figures who shut you down creatively? These folks don’t need to stifle you any longer (although they often still do) because your inner critic does it for them. That keeps you stuck in a rut.

To break free, try thinking of this DJ as a gruff old grandfather who gives you crap to keep you safe. Remember, this grumpy grandpa is woefully out of touch with the times. So, his stern opinions don’t really matter much, do they? Give him a pat on the back for his good intentions, and put your focus back on what makes you come alive.

This success principle will give you the courage to venture into the unknown where you can dance to the beat of your own drummer.

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5. Embrace Your Inner Self

Many of us don’t go after our dreams because we’re afraid folks will find out how odd or strange we are. But our little eccentricities often turn out to be our greatest strengths. Yes, it’s good to be quirky.

Odds are, you lost track of your true passions and talents before you were even old enough to know you were getting off-track. You became slowly “adulterated” by learning to:

  • Take on family roles that don’t match who you really are.
  • Spit back what teachers taught you in school rather than risk getting bad grades for being original.
  • Hide parts of yourself that don’t seem acceptable to certain social groups.

The price for fitting in is that you may wind up leading a life that doesn’t fit you all that well. Your true calling becomes clear when you embrace what makes you different from others and allow yourself to stand out from the crowd, even if it feels awkward. Often, the very qualities you view as your flaws are your greatest gifts.

Here’s How to Listen to Your Inner Voice for Greater Fulfillment.

6. See the Bigger Picture to Find Your True Calling

I cannot stress the importance of this success principle enough. Your true calling is right in front of you. But you may miss it because you’re looking for it in the wrong place.

To “see” it clearly, try widening your point of view.

Case in point: Maria felt she needed to retire early from being a police detective, so she could travel abroad. I encouraged Maria to think of ways that she could continue to serve as a law enforcer (a career she loved) and travel overseas at the same time.

A few months later, Maria landed a job with the United Nations in Bosnia training the local police force to understand and embrace human rights procedures.

Like Maria, you are an everyday rock star capable of accomplishing greater things than you can imagine. Is what you’re looking for right in front of you, too? Do you have an inkling of what it may be?

Look beyond your day-to-day activities, your current job, and even the town you live in. View your life from an eagle’s perspective and be open to new possibilities.

7. Try a Little Wish-List Magic

Pretend I’m your fairy godmother and I give you permission right now to be your most magnificent self. What kind of life would be music to your ears? It doesn’t matter whether it seems unattainable or even downright crazy. Write it down on a wish list.

Get quiet. Be honest. Think big.

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What would you like your career, your relationships, your health, your finances, and your spiritual life to be like? Jot down enough details so that your wishes seem tangible to you. Then, look at this list every morning before you start your day and every night before you go to sleep.

Sounds silly? It’s not. It works! Permitting yourself to daydream about a rich and fulfilling life is the first step to manifesting it.

8. Take Breaks to Get Clues About Your Ideal Future

Did you know that working straight through to a deadline leads to diminishing returns? Research shows that taking a break for 15 minutes every 75 to 90 minutes can help you recharge, refresh your focus, and get more done in less time.[5]

Wait, it gets better! A Stanford study shows that walking increases your creative output increases by 60 percent. Doing repetitive activities such as walking, running, riding your bike, swimming, and sweeping allow solutions to problems to pop into your mind out of nowhere.[6]

What does this success principle have to do with creating your dream life?

These mini-breaks allow you to get vital clues for what to do next to attain your ideal future. Plus, you won’t waste precious time and energy getting lost in other people’s agendas.

9. Take Action on Your Inspired Ideas

Once an inspired thought pops into your mind, take action.

This is one of the most powerful success principles for turning your dreams into reality; the sooner the better. Whatever it is—from calling an old friend to taking a new route home—be sure to do it!

Pay attention to your oddball hunches. You need to go after what you want, not just dream about it. As comedian Jim Carrey warns,

“You can’t just visualize and go eat a sandwich.”

10. Count Your Rockstar Moments

Still not sure you have what it takes to get your dream life? This final success principle is guaranteed to help.

Make a list of everything you’ve ever accomplished. As you read back through it, put a star next to each item, and let it sink in.

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You’ll be pleasantly surprised by how good you’ll feel about yourself afterward. You’ll also see how effective you’ve been in the past at getting what you want. You’ve succeeded before, you can succeed again.

You already rock. You just need to own it. Trust me, you’ve got this!

Final Thoughts

Eleanor Roosevelt said,

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”

Following these success principles will help you find the time and energy to do the things that really matter and live with clear intention.

By spending just one hour a week doing something you love, focusing on your strengths and achievements, embracing what makes you different, and acting on inspired ideas, you can create a life that is a perfect fit for you, step-by-step.

If you don’t have a clue about what your dream life could look like yet, don’t worry. Your heart knows. It has been “talking” to you for a long time. It’s just being muffled by KCRP, buried under a lot of “shoulds” and fear.

This article can also help you figure out the life you truly want to live: How to Get Motivated and Be Happy Every Day When You Wake Up.

Stand still, get quiet, and listen. It’s constantly telling you what you need to do to realize your own rockstar potential. It may be just a whisper now, but the more you pay attention to it, the louder it will get, and the easier it will be to follow.

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Featured photo credit: Rahul Dey via unsplash.com

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