Advertising

Only People Who Grew Up Jewish Would Understand These Things

Advertising
Only People Who Grew Up Jewish Would Understand These Things

I love being Jewish. I love the community, I love our history of endurance and fighting, and I love being around so many great people. It does not matter how often you go to temple or not, because being Jewish is just as much an ethnicity as it is a religion.

And there were some great things and some not so great things about growing up as a Jew. Here is a look back on quite a few of those memories.

You played Mahjong with your mother. And she beat you

Your grandmother played it. Your mother probably played it. And mahjong as of late has been making a resurgence ever since its nadir in the 70s and 80s. The clack of those Chinese tiles, and your mother screeching whenever she beat you or her friends is a memory which has lasted among Jewish families for the past century.

You had to deal with reactions to the pork thing

There are two reactions that Christians have when it comes to the rules against pork. The first is that they think it is not that important, and offer us a sizzling strip of bacon. The second is that they go in the opposite direction and go out of their way not to offer us any pork.

Advertising

The second reaction is better than the first, but there is a sizable percentage of non-observant Jews who will eat pork.

You also had to deal with their ignorance of kosher rules

Most non-Jews know that Jews do not eat pork. But I have seen non-Jews assume that this means that Jews are vegetarians – and then offer a plate of oysters as a substitute.

You cannot blame them for not knowing that shellfish is also forbidden, but it is frustrating nonetheless.

You got extra holidays

This picture pretty much sums it up.

Advertising

Those holidays were not always a good thing. It was frustrating when that dance, or your softball game, or anything like that fell on Passover. But it did give you an opportunity to get out of school for a while longer, even if it just meant that mom was dragging you to temple.

You had to deal with the Christmas-Hanukah comparison

They are not the same holiday, and while Christians can understand it, they often do not. The worst case scenario is when they assume that Hanukah is a holiday created by Jews to celebrate in the winter just like they do, and not that it is thousands of years old.

You ate Chinese food on Christmas Day

And if the Christmas comparison was not irritating enough, you had to deal with the reality that everything is closed on Christmas Day.

Except Chinese restaurants. And so just like that family in “A Christmas Story”, Christmas meant trundling off and sitting down for a Chinese meal with other Jewish families. It is a stereotype, but it is a good one.

Advertising

You had your friends tell you, “I want to be a Jew!”

This was a difficult one to react to- on one hand, it was clear that your friends were sincerely trying to be nice to you. But on the other hand, all too often that desire is rooted in Jewish stereotypes, such as the successful lawyer or the businessmen dealing in insurance claims. All you can do is smile, nod, and thank them in response.

You have to call your mom. No excuses

If you are away, you have to call your mother regularly. It does not matter if you are on a date, busy, or anywhere else. You had better call your mom, or she will attack you with the most fearsome and deadly weapon in her entire arsenal.

Guilt.

You get asked to speak “Jewish.”

Sometimes, people will remember that it is called Hebrew. Sometimes. But a lot of the time, you are expected to sound like someone from “Fiddler on the Roof”, making bizarre noises.

Advertising

Of course, if you do know Hebrew, you can use it to insult your enemies behind their backs. Because you probably did that too.

You grew up with parents who do care for you

Yes, they may nag you endlessly about being a doctor or a lawyer. Yes, they may have been overprotective when raising you.

But above all else, they do truly care for you. Even if that means that when you call them, you will have to endure 20 minutes of them asking about why you are not a doctor or a lawyer yet.

Being Jewish means being part of a terrific community, with a very different learning experience compared to most other children. And while there can be plenty of strange experiences, never mind teasing and good old anti-Semitism, there is also so much else to being part of the tribe as well.

Advertising

So remember the good and bad memories, and use them to help build a better future for the Jewish generations to come.

Featured photo credit: Kristy via flickr.com

More by this author

5 Focus Hacks To Meet Your Goals 5 Fixes For Common Sleep Issues All Couples Deal With 8 Signs You Have A Strong Personality That Might Scare Some People How to Achieve Quick Success at Work Even If You’re Lacking in Clear Direction You’ll No Longer Be Fooled by Skillful Liars If You Know This Concept

Trending in Family

1 The Heartbreak of Addiction: Coping When Your Significant Other Relapses 2 25 Super Fun Things to Do With Family to Strengthen Your Bond 3 25 Fabulously Fun Family Activities To Bring You Closer Together 4 How to Set Family Goals to Build a Happy Family (With Examples) 5 15 Best Father’s Day Gifts Your Father Won’t Buy On His Own

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on January 13, 2022

10 Cheap And Amazing Honeymoon Ideas

Advertising
10 Cheap And Amazing Honeymoon Ideas

A honeymoon is important.  The wedding is over.  The months, or even years, of stress and planning are finally over.  It’s time for the two of you to relax, settle in, and start enjoying your time together as you embark on your first journey as a family.

To make the most of this time for the least amount of money, it’s important to focus on what you want out of a honeymoon.  This isn’t your typical list of touristy honeymoon locations everyone goes to.  Rather, it’s a list of cheap honeymoon experiences a couple can enjoy together, regardless of where it’s at.

1. Camping

A week long camping trip is a fantastic way to see how you mesh together as a couple.  You’re put in a low impact “survival” situation where it’s just the 2 of you and nature.  You have a chance to see how your new spouse handles themselves when left with the basics of life.  There are amazing national parks all over the United States where you can camp for a week for $20-30, disconnect from technology, and enjoy some of the natural wonders our nation has to offer.

Advertising

2. Staycation

You don’t have to go anywhere for a honeymoon.  In fact, the tradition of taking a honeymoon vacation is a relatively new one.  Prior to the 19th century, a honeymoon involved staying home together for a month to get to know each other physically.  Think of how blissful it could be to take a full month off work, disconnect from the outside world, and focus entirely on projects together.  You may not be wowing your friends and family with pictures of some exotic location, but they’ll be envious of your escape from the rat race nonetheless.

3. Island Getaway

People tend to overspend on their honeymoon vacations to Hawaii, Tahiti, etc.  Going to these places doesn’t have to be expensive.  You don’t need to stay in a 5 star resort when you’re on a Best Western budget.  You’re there to be in the atmosphere of the island, not a hotel room. Book a cheap flight and sleep in a hotel alternative, on the beach or in your car.  It’s the view in paradise that really matters.

4. Fancy Resort

Book an expensive resort, spa, or retreat in the city you live in.  While this may seem counterintuitive as a cheap destination, when you consider your savings on airfare and other travel costs, you can afford to be treated like royalty within your own city limits.  If you book a honeymoon package, you’ll end up with a lot of free amenities and extra attention.  There’s no need to fly halfway across the world to live the good life.

Advertising

5. Road Trip

The journey is often more fulfilling than the actual destination.  If you fly out to some exotic locale, you’ll be stuck on a plane for 8-30 hours.  Rent a luxury car, pick a handful of places you each have always wanted to visit, and go on an adventure.  You can keep food costs down by packing your own snacks, but it’s always a good idea to sample the local delicacies wherever you go, even if it’s only a few states over.

6. Charter a Boat

If the ocean is your thing, a week-long cruise can cost you $1500-$3000 per person, depending on the destination.  You also have to factor in travel costs to and from the cruise, alcohol, souvenirs, and on-shore excursions.  You’ll also be surrounded by people.  For the same price (and often much cheaper), you can charter your own boat and enjoy the experience in private.

7. Las Vegas/Atlantic City

If gambling is your thing, these are the places to do it.  Which one you choose depends on your preference, budget, and proximity.  The way to make this vacation cheaper is to gamble smart.  Stay away from low odd tables (i.e craps, roulette) and read up on the MIT blackjack strategies to beat the house.  If you do it right, you can win enough for a free trip (and gain a valuable team skill in the process).

Advertising

8. Themed Retreats

There are weeklong retreats all over the world where you can fully immerse yourselves as a couple into a hobby you’re both passionate about.  Go on a yoga/meditation retreat, a ranch, a vineyard/farm, a backpacking adventure, treasure hunt, or whatever you’re into.

9. Working Honeymoon

Your honeymoon doesn’t have to be a vacation.  For a truly memorable experience, dedicate a week to a charity or volunteer organization.  You can drive out to a campground to help restore it in the offseason.  Maybe you’ve always wanted to volunteer to help out your local animal shelter, plant trees, help the homeless, etc.  Use the time to do something together as a couple that will fulfill you spiritually while contributing to the community.  Just because you’re on a honeymoon doesn’t mean you can’t be productive.

10. Festivals, Fairs & Special Events

Every city, state, and country has festivals, fairs, and special events.  Find one you’re interested in.  If you time your wedding right, your honeymoon can be a trip to one of these festivals.  Burning Man, SXSW, Bonnaroo, the Renaissance Fair, regional harvest festivals, Mardi Gras, New Years Eve in Times Square, a movie premiere, or whatever you’re into.  If you plan your honeymoon at the right time in the right place, the possibilities are endless.

Advertising

Featured photo credit: Josue Michel via unsplash.com

Read Next