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10 Feelings That Only People With ADHD Understand

10 Feelings That Only People With ADHD Understand

You know the story: ADHD does not really exist and has been created so that Big Pharm can make lots of money! They make stimulants and they sell like hot cakes.

That’s just one example of the many myths and misconceptions about ADHD, so I am not even going to begin to outline the reasons why it’s wrong. Let me say that ADHD really is a condition and that it can affect your life negatively. On the other hand, it is important to remember that people with ADHD also have a lot going for them.

Here are 10 feelings that only they can identify with. Read these and you will begin to understand what it feels like to have ADHD- then spread the word. It might help people to learn more about the disorder.

1. They feel rejected

Sad, but true. It is all to do with the problem of being unable to control their impulses, and keep them under control. That leads to all sorts of problems in social interaction at school and later in adulthood. People do not understand that it is connected to the way the ADHD brain is wired and that it is not due to laziness or being forgetful. People with ADHD can find it almost impossible to pay attention and stay on topic in conversations and meetings. It is no wonder they are sidelined.

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2. They feel discouraged and dejected

They interrupt and make inappropriate remarks. They talk and laugh too loudly. They also tend to talk rather a lot. They hear remarks like, “I just told you that, don’t you remember?” or,  “You only care about yourself.” As you can imagine, people lose patience and the person with ADHD feels dejected. This can lead to low self esteem and depression.

3. They thrive on love and support

If they are in a relationship, they will thrive on affectionate support. That may seem obvious, but there are millions of people who still do not believe that ADHD is a real condition, even in 2015! Parents and partners who know something about ADHD are savvy enough to give real support.

4. They can hyperfocus when their curiosity is aroused

Stephen Tonti describes how he fell off his chair at school trying to watch all the kids playing outside. Watch the video where he explains that once his curiosity is aroused, he is able to stay hyperfocused and all the fidgeting and distracted behavior disappears. He can stay focused for hours. All this happens when he gets excited and really into a topic or area of work. Very often, the problem with ADHD kids and adults when they are in the zone is that you can never get them to stop or finish!

5. They are happier with a well structured routine

Adults and kids with ADHD hate boredom. In addition, they are impulsive and highly distracted. But give them a routine and a well structured timetable and they will start to get things done. They actually have a love/hate relationship with routine. But learning to use visual cues, checklists and timing activities can make an enormous difference.

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 6. They feel frustrated

The main cause of frustration is trying to focus and get a task done. Society demands that we are punctual, precise and tidy. Each one of these things is a nightmare for an ADHDer. They will get there but it is often a very long and painful process. Imagine just trying to focus on what a person is saying, with one fact or name to remember. One sufferer describes this experience as being like trying to access information when there is a loud hum which prevents you from understanding what people are saying:

“Now you’ve lost track of the first person and begin to feel panic. You start looking for the first people in order to recollect their information, but you can’t because you’re still collecting from the others. Now every bit of information that breaks through the hum carries the same weight. There is no way to distinguish what is most important. You try to start over, but you’ve already forgotten much of the first bits you’ve collected. It’s a losing battle and eventually you give up on that task and berate yourself for failing.”- An adult with ADHD.

7. They are consoled by ADHD success stories

A sufferer is always comforted by the fact that many people with ADHD seem to thrive in spite of all the drawbacks and handicaps. They have exploited the creativity and sensory intensity that also comes with ADHD. Often, senses are so sharp that they can be creative in art, music and writing. They are inspired by Ty Pennington, Will Smith, Michael Phelps and thousands more who have thrived with ADHD.

“I can distill complicated facts and come up with simple solutions. I can look out on an industry with all kinds of problems and say, ‘How can I do this better?’ My ADD brain naturally searches for better ways of doing things.” – David Neeleman founder of JetBlue.

8. They are exhausted from so many things going on

Ask any person with ADHD what it is like and they will tell you that their filters are not working at all. Normal people filter out distractions and irrelevant facts when they take a phone call in a crowded place. But the person with ADHD has so many things coming at them that it often feels overwhelming.

They would just love to have an OFF button in their brain so that they could wind down and relax. Unfortunately, this is not possible for them. Stephanie Sarkis is a psychotherapist and she described ADHD as like having non-stop committee meetings in your brain where you have to look at all the options. It’s exhausting.

9. They are happy when multi-tasking

The ADHD brain as we have seen is all over the place and this is great when you have to multi-task. Some ADHDers can really use this to their advantage. Most people are told that multi-tasking can ruin concentration and that it can take a lot of time to get back on track when you switch from one task to the other. The person with ADHD finds it absolutely normal and can really get lots done:

“To do ANYTHING, I have to multitask. In fact, as I’m typing this, I’m drinking coffee and talking on the phone! It’s like if my brain doesn’t have enough stimulation, then I’m comatose.” – An adult with ADHD.

10. They often hide their ADHD

Adam Levine from Maroon 5 has ADHD and he has done a lot of work to help people to come out with ADHD, so that they can get treatment and function better in society. ADHD still has stigma attached to it and coming out at work can be risky if you do not have a sympathetic boss, for example. Adam is working on the Own It campaign with other ADHD charities so that adults especially can reach out and get reassessed, if necessary. ADHD is not just for kids and it continues into adulthood. There are about 10 million adults with ADHD in the USA.

Now that you know what it is like to have ADHD, why not reach out and help someone you may know with the disorder?

Featured photo credit: Can’t study.Studying may be difficult for children with ADHD/ amenclinicsphotos ac via flickr.com

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Robert Locke

Author of Ziger the Tiger Stories, a health enthusiast specializing in relationships, life improvement and mental health.

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Last Updated on March 13, 2019

How to Get out of a Rut: 12 Useful Ways to Get Unstuck

How to Get out of a Rut: 12 Useful Ways to Get Unstuck

Have you gotten into a rut before? Or are you in a rut right now?

You know you’re in a rut when you run out of ideas and inspiration. I personally see a rut as a productivity vacuum. It might very well be a reason why you aren’t getting results. Even as you spend more time on your work, you can’t seem to get anything constructive done. While I’m normally productive, I get into occasional ruts (especially when I’ve been working back-to-back without rest). During those times, I can spend an entire day in front of the computer and get nothing done. It can be quite frustrating.

Over time, I have tried and found several methods that are helpful to pull me out of a rut. If you experience ruts too, whether as a working professional, a writer, a blogger, a student or other work, you will find these useful. Here are 12 of my personal tips to get out of ruts:

1. Work on the small tasks.

When you are in a rut, tackle it by starting small. Clear away your smaller tasks which have been piling up. Reply to your emails, organize your documents, declutter your work space, and reply to private messages.

Whenever I finish doing that, I generate a positive momentum which I bring forward to my work.

2. Take a break from your work desk.

Get yourself away from your desk and go take a walk. Go to the washroom, walk around the office, go out and get a snack.

Your mind is too bogged down and needs some airing. Sometimes I get new ideas right after I walk away from my computer.

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3. Upgrade yourself

Take the down time to upgrade yourself. Go to a seminar. Read up on new materials (#7). Pick up a new language. Or any of the 42 ways here to improve yourself.

The modern computer uses different typefaces because Steve Jobs dropped in on a calligraphy class back in college. How’s that for inspiration?

4. Talk to a friend.

Talk to someone and get your mind off work for a while.

Talk about anything, from casual chatting to a deep conversation about something you really care about. You will be surprised at how the short encounter can be rejuvenating in its own way.

5. Forget about trying to be perfect.

If you are in a rut, the last thing you want to do is step on your own toes with perfectionist tendencies.

Just start small. Do what you can, at your own pace. Let yourself make mistakes.

Soon, a little trickle of inspiration will come. And then it’ll build up with more trickles. Before you know it, you have a whole stream of ideas.

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6. Paint a vision to work towards.

If you are continuously getting in a rut with your work, maybe there’s no vision inspiring you to move forward.

Think about why you are doing this, and what you are doing it for. What is the end vision in mind?

Make it as vivid as possible. Make sure it’s a vision that inspires you and use that to trigger you to action.

7. Read a book (or blog).

The things we read are like food to our brain. If you are out of ideas, it’s time to feed your brain with great materials.

Here’s a list of 40 books you can start off with. Stock your browser with only the feeds of high quality blogs, such as Lifehack.org, DumbLittleMan, Seth Godin’s Blog, Tim Ferris’ Blog, Zen Habits or The Personal Excellence Blog.

Check out the best selling books; those are generally packed with great wisdom.

8. Have a quick nap.

If you are at home, take a quick nap for about 20-30 minutes. This clears up your mind and gives you a quick boost. Nothing quite like starting off on a fresh start after catching up on sleep.

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9. Remember why you are doing this.

Sometimes we lose sight of why we do what we do, and after a while we become jaded. A quick refresher on why you even started on this project will help.

What were you thinking when you thought of doing this? Retrace your thoughts back to that moment. Recall why you are doing this. Then reconnect with your muse.

10. Find some competition.

Nothing quite like healthy competition to spur us forward. If you are out of ideas, then check up on what people are doing in your space.

Colleagues at work, competitors in the industry, competitors’ products and websites, networking conventions.. you get the drill.

11. Go exercise.

Since you are not making headway at work, might as well spend the time shaping yourself up.

Sometimes we work so much that we neglect our health and fitness. Go jog, swim, cycle, whichever exercise you prefer.

As you improve your physical health, your mental health will improve, too. The different facets of ourselves are all interlinked.

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Here’re 15 Tips to Restart the Exercise Habit (and How to Keep It).

12. Take a good break.

Ruts are usually signs that you have been working too long and too hard. It’s time to get a break.

Beyond the quick tips above, arrange for a 1-day or 2-days of break from your work. Don’t check your (work) emails or do anything work-related. Relax and do your favorite activities. You will return to your work recharged and ready to start.

Contrary to popular belief, the world will not end from taking a break from your work. In fact, you will be much more ready to make an impact after proper rest. My best ideas and inspiration always hit me whenever I’m away from my work.

Take a look at this to learn the importance of rest: The Importance of Scheduling Downtime

More Resources About Getting out of a Rut

Featured photo credit: Joshua Earle via unsplash.com

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