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10 Signs You’re Working With A Narcissist

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10 Signs You’re Working With A Narcissist

Working alongside a narcissist can be annoying at the very least, and at worst can actually impede a company’s progress. The trick to dealing with an egocentric individual is to identify them for what they are, and not allow their behavior to affect you. It’s definitely easier said than done. However, if you allow them to get under your skin, not only will your work suffer, but other aspects of your life will as well.

Narcissists exhibit the following traits. If you notice any of your coworkers acting in any these ways, stay away from them as best you can.

1. They appear likable at fist

Narcissists are good at putting on a decent show for the public. They come off as friendly, gentle, and charismatic. However, this behavior is only a front. You’ll see their true personality come out during stressful situations when things aren’t going so smoothly. When someone else messes up, they’ll be the first to let them know. They also won’t accept any excuse. When a narcissist lets his true identity show, it will throw your entire perception of him for a loop. I’m not saying you should be wary of all polite and respectful individuals, but do be sure to notice how these people handle certain situations.

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2. They talk a big game

Narcissists will always talk up how good they are, and how much they’ve accomplished in life. They rarely give credit to the people who have helped them along the way. They act as if everything that’s come to them in life was through their efforts and abilities alone. Though it can be nauseating, the worst thing you can do is call a narcissist out when they’re going on and on about themselves. That’ll just make them go deeper into detail about how awesome they are.

3. They drop names

Narcissists also seem to know all the most important people in the industry and community. Whenever they have a story about happy hour, they’ll be sure to tell you exactly who was there, especially if they know that you don’t know who that person is. Subconsciously, they want you to be intimidated by the fact that they know so many people. In actuality, they most likely just engaged in boring small talk with all the people they listed, and probably didn’t even enjoy themselves. However, they’ll pretend as if you missed out because you weren’t important enough to be there.

4. They’re entitled

Narcissists think they’re above everyone else for no other reason than they are who they are. If a promotion is coming up, they’ll convince everyone around them that they’ll be the one moving up, seeing as they’ve put so much effort into their work lately. Of course, they take no notice of all the hard work other people have done. They certainly don’t give credit where credit is due (except to themselves, naturally). The best way to deal with a narcissist with a sense of entitlement is to (hopefully) get that promotion yourself through your own hard work and dedication.

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5. They play the victim

Of course, if you get the promotion, they’ll be the first to point out that it was probably because you invited the boss to your house for dinner that one time (even if they’d done it before as well). Narcissists will always have some sob story to rationalize their shortcomings, and will try to make you feel bad for them. They don’t take the time to realize that everyone faces hardships, and nobody has an easy life. There’s nothing you can do for them here. Narcissists will always see themselves as a victim of their circumstances.

6. They hate criticism

It should be obvious by now that narcissists think they can do no wrong. So when someone critiques their performance, they take it as an insult. They rarely use this constructive advice to better their performance. In their eyes, the other person simply doesn’t know what he’s talking about, so why should they change? Of course, they’ll be the first person to criticize someone else for a shoddy performance. They will do this out of spite. rather than to be constructive. Because their use of criticism is to put others down, that’s how they perceive it when others criticize them.

7. They always have an excuse

Along with playing the victim, narcissists always have an excuse when they screw up. If they made a typo on a report, it was probably because the keyboard got stuck or the spellcheck didn’t catch the mistake. If they don’t turn something in on time, it’s because they were swamped with all the other work they had to do. Let me emphasize this point again: when other people mess up, narcissists don’t accept any excuse at all. Only they live a hard life, after all.

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8. They take everything personally

Narcissists take everything someone says as a personal attack. When their boss gives them criticism that’s supposed to be constructive, narcissists will (of course) have some excuse. They will wonder why the boss didn’t yell at another colleague for doing the same thing (when in actuality they probably did — just in private). They’ll also think people are “out to get them,” and have some personal vendetta against them. They don’t realize that their boss is criticizing their performance at their job, which they get paid to do. It has nothing to do with how the boss feels about them personally, but the narcissist will always take it that way.

9. They leave a trail of destruction

Narcissists don’t usually last too long at jobs. Since they feel entitled, and at the same time feel like everyone’s out to get them, they’ll cut and run from a job the minute they don’t see any chance of advancement, or when they get the feeling their boss hates them. Before they get to that point; however, they’ll usually stop performing well at their job, and let everyone else around them pick up the slack. When they leave, they also leave behind a ton of projects half-finished. This sets the company back even farther. And of course, since they’re gone, they won’t even worry about it.

10. They don’t see themselves as narcissists

Narcissists don’t even know how full of themselves they are. They think everyone operates the same way, which is why they feel so personally attacked all the time. Since they fail to acknowledge their own shortcomings and weaknesses, they will never change. In their eyes, they’re perfect, and everyone else around them are the ones who need to be fixed.

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Featured photo credit: Flickrr via farm5.staticflickr.com

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Matt Duczeminski

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Last Updated on August 25, 2021

Why Personal Branding Is Important to Your Career

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Why Personal Branding Is Important to Your Career

As a recruiter, I have met and interviewed hundreds of candidates who have no idea who they are.

Without a personal brand, candidates struggle to answer the question: “tell me about yourself—who are you?” They have no idea about who they are, what their strengths are, and how they can add value to the company. They present their CV’s believing that their CV is the key to their career success. In some ways, your CV still has its use. However, in today’s job market, you need more than a CV to stand out in a crowd.

According to Celinne Da Costa:[1]

“Personal brand is essentially your golden ticket to networking with the right people, getting hired for a dream job, or building an influential business.” She believes that “a strong personal brand allows you to stand out in an oversaturated marketplace by exposing desired audiences to your vision, skillset, and personality in a way that is strategically aligned with your career goals.”

A personal brand opens up your world to so many more career opportunities that you would never have been exposed to with just your CV.

What Is Your Personal Brand?

“Personal branding is how you distinctively market your uniqueness.” —Bernard Kelvin Clive

Today, the job market is very competitive and tough. Having a great CV will only let you go so far because everyone has a CV, but no one else has your distinct personal brand! It is your personal brand that differentiates you from everyone else and that is what people buy—you.

Your personal brand is your mark on the world. It is how people you interact with and the world see you. It is your legacy—it is more important than a business brand because your personal brand lasts forever.

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I have coached people who have very successful careers, and they come to me because they have suddenly found that they are not getting the opportunities or having the conversations that would them to their next role. They are having what I call a “career meltdown,” all because they have no personal brand.

A personal brand helps you become conscious of your differences and your uniqueness. It allows you to position yourself in a way that makes you stand out from the pack, especially among other potential job applicants.

Don’t get me wrong, having a great CV and a great LinkedIn profile is important. However, there are a few steps that you have to take to have a CV and LinkedIn profile that is aligned to who you are, the value you offer to the market, and the personal guarantee that you deliver results.

Building your personal brand is about strategically, creatively, and professionally presenting what makes you, you. Knowing who you are and the value you bring to the table enables you to be more informed, agile, and adaptable to the changing dynamic world of work. This is how you can avoid having a series of career meltdowns.

Your Personal Brand Is Essential for Your Career Success

In her article, Why Personal Branding Is More Important Than Ever, Caroline Castrillon outlines key reasons why a personal brand is essential for career success.

According to Castrillon,[2]

“One reason is that it is more popular for recruiters to use social media during the interview process. According to a 2018 CareerBuilder survey, 70% of employers use social media to screen candidates during the hiring process, and 43% of employers use social media to check on current employees.”

The first thing I do as a recruiter when I want to check out a candidate or coaching client is to look them up on LinkedIn or other social media platforms, such as Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. Your digital footprint is the window that highlights to the world who you are. When you have no control over how you want to be seen, you are making a big mistake because you are leaving it up to someone else to make a judgment for you as to who you are.

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As Jeff Bezos, the founder of Amazon, once said, “Your brand is what people say about you when you are not in the room.”

In her book, Becoming, Michelle Obama writes about the importance of having a personal brand and her journey to defining her personal brand. She wrote that:

“if you don’t get out there and define yourself, you’ll be quickly and inaccurately defined by others.”

When you have a personal brand, you are in control. You know exactly what people will say about you when you leave the room.

The magic of a personal brand is that gives you control over how you want to be seen in the world. Your confidence and self-belief enable you to leverage opportunities and make informed decisions about your career and your future. You no longer experience the frustrations of a career meltdown or being at a crossroads not knowing what to do next with your career or your life. With a personal brand, you have focus, clarity, and a strategy to move forward toward future success.

Creating your personal brand does not happen overnight. It takes a lot of work and self-reflection. You will be expected to step outside of your comfort zone not once, but many times.

The good news is that the more time you spend outside of your comfort zone, the more you will like being there. Being outside of your comfort zone is where you can test the viability of and fine-tune your personal brand.

5 Key Steps to Creating Your Personal Brand

These five steps will help you create a personal brand that will deliver you the results you desire with your career and in life.

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1. Set Your Personal Goals

What is it that you want to do in the next five years? What will your future self be doing in the next five to ten years? What is important to you? If you can answer these questions, then you are on the right path. If not, then you have to start thinking about them.

2. Create Your Unique Value Proposition

Create your unique value proposition by asking yourself these four questions:

  1. What are your personality features? What benefit do you offer people?
  2. Who are you and why do people enjoy working with you?
  3. What do you do and what do people want you to do for them? How do you solve their problems?
  4. What makes you different from others like you?

The answers to these questions will give you the information you need to create your professional story, which is the key step to creating your personal brand.

3. Write Your Professional Story

Knowing who you are, what you want, and the unique value you offer is essential to you creating your professional story. People remember stories. Your personal story incorporates your value proposition and tells people who you are and what makes you unique. This is what people will remember about you.

4. Determine Which Platforms Will Support Your Personal Brand

Decide which social media accounts and online platforms will best represent your brand and allow you to share your voice. In a professional capacity, having a LinkedIn profile and a CV that reflects your brand is key to your positioning in relation to role opportunities. People will be connecting with you because they will like the story you are telling.

5. Become Recognized for Sharing Your Knowledge and Expertise

A great way for you to promote yourself is by sharing knowledge and helping others. This is where you prove you know your stuff and you gain exposure for doing so. You can do this through social media, writing, commenting, video, joining professional groups, networking, etc. Find your own style and uniqueness and use it to attract clients, the opportunities, or the jobs you desire.

The importance of having a personal brand is not going to go away. In fact, it is the only way where you can stand out and be unique in a complex changing world of work. If you don’t have a personal brand, someone will do it for you. If you let this happen, you have no control and you may not like the story they create.

Standing out from others takes time and investment. Most people cannot make the change by themselves, and this is where engaging a personal brand coach is a viable option to consider.

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As a personal brand coach, working with my clients to create their personal brand is my passion. I love the fact that we can work together to create a personal story that defines exactly what people will say when you leave the room.

Other People’s Stories

Listening to other people’s stories is a great way to learn. In his article, 7 TED Talks About Personal Branding, Rafael Dos Santos presents the best Ted Talks where speakers share their stories about the “why,” “what,” and “how” of personal branding.((GuidedPR: 7 TED Talks About Personal Branding))

Take some time out to listen to these speakers sharing their stories and thoughts about personal branding. You will definitely learn so much about how you can start your journey of defining yourself and taking control of your professional and personal life.

Your personal brand, without a doubt, is your secret weapon to your career success. As Michelle Obama said,

“your story is what you have, what you will always have. It is something to own.”

So, go own your story. Go on the journey to create your personal brand that defines who you are, highlights your uniqueness, and the value you offer to the world.

Featured photo credit: Austin Distel via unsplash.com

Reference

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