Advertising
Advertising

These 12 Things Would Happen When You Can Enjoy Being Alone

These 12 Things Would Happen When You Can Enjoy Being Alone

Lets face it, we live in a society where our value is judged by the radius of our social circle. A society which rewards the hyper-social and labels loners as weird and withdrawn. Admittedly whilst having a strong social group is beneficial to our health both physically and psychologically, those who can enjoy being alone in addition to social situations will become the happiest people out there.

In honesty, if you can’t enjoy being alone then you’re probably not doing anything important in life. Here are some reasons why.

1. You’ll Become Familiar With Exactly Who You Are

Anyone who spends a significant length of time alone will tell you of the enlightening effect it can have. When you’re alone and in silence, the voice in your head grows louder and more revealing.

It compensates for the lack of input usually made by other people, and eventually — if you listen to it — you’ll know your character on a much deeper level. Who said mindfulness was a social practice?

Advertising

2. You’ll No Longer Need Others to Be Happy

Let’s think this for a second. Who is more normal, someone who needs to remain around others to be happy, or those who can be happy solely within themselves? In reality, those who have a constant need to be surrounded by others in order to be joyful are the ones with the problem, though society would have us believe otherwise.

If you can’t enjoy being alone, then you can’t enjoy life in its fullest.

3. You’ll Be Better Off When The Going Gets Tough

It’s a known fact of life that if you’re trying to be successful, you won’t be surrounded by people you like all the time. In honesty, there will be people you hate. There will be people around you who try to bring you down, meaning that you’ll have to spend some time by yourself in order to get away from them. It’s better that you’re comfortable with it when you do.

4. You’ll Be More Confident In Social Situations

It sounds paradoxical doesn’t it? In order to be confident in social situations you need to be comfortable within the opposite of them. But it makes sense. If you lack the confidence to be alone you’ll panic and overcompensate, often coming across as needy — a code-red clinger around people. They’ll just think you’re weird. Only when you become okay with standing by yourself, only when you practice a level of detachment will you genuinely attract others.

Advertising

5. You’ll Have Clearness Of Mind

When you drop your attachment to being super-social like our society expects us to, you’ll stop caring for all the gossip which comes with it. Who is going where with who, or doing what. Who’s seeing who. Who hates who. Keeping tabs on all of these social aspects is energy consuming. When you’re good at being alone these things stop being a major concern.Your thoughts will occupy more important matters and will be put to better use. Leading me to my next point.

6. You’ll Be More Productive

Yes, with clearness of mind comes a rocketing in your productivity. Obvious right. Since you’ve freed up a lot of time and energy by forgetting about all the social dimensions, you’ll be free to spend them on things which will actually, y’know, get you places in life. Starting that business or reading that book, it will all come easier.

7. You’ll Notice Those Who Didn’t Appreciate You Much

After a period of time of becoming comfortable with being alone, others will wonder why you’re not so needy and attached to them as you once were. “OMG why aren’t they texting me!” or “Ugh he’s probably with someone else”, and you’ll be dropped quicker than a hot potato. These people are exactly the type who aren’t comfortable with being alone. They need social interaction to feel value in themselves, a toxic mindset.

Those who genuinely appreciate you will be thankful any time they get to spend with you, and they’ll be happy with your new-found confidence and productivity. The others will slowly fade away.

Advertising

8. You’ll Attract Similar People

This goes back to point 6. The combination of your confident aura and newly free social space will mean that you’ll begin to attract others who can handle not seeing you for prolonged periods of time. People who have other important stuff to do in their alone time and who aren’t concerned with gossip and the drama that comes with it. That is to say, people who enjoy being alone.

You’re the average of your peer group, if it’s filled with people doing important things and going important places, you too will do the same.

9. You Won’t Be As Disappointed When Others Let You Down

We’ve all been there, you’re all excited to meet your friend(s) for that fun night you planned, only for them to bail on you last minute. People who are attached to being around people will readily jump to a better opportunity if it arises, and quickly drop other plans they may have had. You won’t get this when you enjoy being alone because you’ll be around people who appreciate you more.

Even if they do bail you’ll always have your comfortable, productive self to fall back on to.

Advertising

10. You’ll Appreciate Others More

When you spend less time around people, gather your thoughts and get important stuff done, you realise the value of having people with integrity, self-confidence and low social attachment around you. When you eventually do get to spend time with others, you’ll appreciate it all the more, and ultimately have a better time with them.

Sometimes you have to take a couple of steps back to appreciate the bigger picture.

11. You’ll Become More Adventurous

When you’re comfortable with yourself and no longer require the acceptance of others in order to be happy, various social norms and expectations fly out the window. Pressures are lifted and you feel free to do whatever it is which makes you happy. Whether it’s trying a new hobby, planning a solo trip or practising meditation.

There’s no one to laugh at you. The social rope binding you will be cut, and you’ll be free to spread your wings and fly, or something.

12. You’ll Become More Reflective

It’s easy to get caught up in the lightening quick pace of the world, and often times we loose track of exactly where we are going in life. When you can enjoy the solitude you experience from being alone, it becomes possible to reflect on recent times. What went well, what could be improved, where you’re going. All things which need time and attention. Spending time alone will give you that.

Featured photo credit: Young guy siting on the roof via shutterstock.com

More by this author

10 Great Psychology Books To Change Your Life 10 Reasons Why What Others Think Of You Is Not Important These 12 Things Would Happen When You Can Enjoy Being Alone 10 Most Valuable Startups Launched By Students This Is How The US Will Switch To 100% Renewable Energy By 2050

Trending in Communication

1 How to Live up to Your Full Potential and Succeed in Life 2 Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset 3 10 Strategies to Keep Moving Forward When You’re Feeling Extra Stuck 4 Learn the Different Types of Love (and Better Understand Your Partner) 5 Anxiety Coping Mechanisms That Work When You’re Stressed to the Max

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

Advertising

The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

Advertising

How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

Advertising

There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

Advertising

When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

Read Next