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10 Signs You’re An Old Soul Trapped In A Young Body

10 Signs You’re An Old Soul Trapped In A Young Body

People have often call me an “old soul,” which is slightly ironic since I look pretty darn young for my age. In truth though, they do have a point. I really don’t act like most millenials. Whereas the majority of them are out partying and socializing, you’re more likely to find me reading a book, watching Netflix, or listening to NPR (in order to keep up with what’s going on around the world of course).

After some self-evaluation, it was easy to recognize what makes me an old soul. But what about you? How can you figure out if we share that same trait? Read on!

1. You are often described as being “boring”

Okay, so maybe people won’t come out and say you are boring to your face. But you get the feeling that your friends and acquaintances might think of you that way. It’s not like you can help it though; it’s not your fault that you’d rather stay indoors and relax than go bar hopping! Chances are that they’re going to wake up with more regrets than you the next day anyway, so why even bother?

2. You aren’t understood by your peers

If you are an old soul, then your mind works differently compared to most of the people in your age group. So much so that it can be hard to try and understand them. Of course, the reverse is true as well, meaning it’s likely they don’t understand you either.

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Often, this leads to some awkward conversations. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been in a situation where someone’s like “hey bro we’re going to go to a concert tonight, wanna join,” and I’m just like “uh, yeah, I’d rather just sit in front of a computer screen and play a video game. Thanks though.” That’s usually around the time when they start backing away slowly.

3. You get better grades

Having a near-zero desire to go out and party in high school and college means that you have much more free time to sleep and study. I can’t tell you how many times I was able to beat the grading curve in college due to the fact that 90% of the rest of my class was hungover or dead tired. Thanks guys!

4. You are probably single

The way we old souls act and think can make it difficult for someone our own age to understand us — let alone want to date us. There are of course exceptions, but by and large, you’ll probably find it harder to acquire a girlfriend or boyfriend. The great news is that we probably won’t be single when we’re older, since practically everyone starts to develop “old-soul” traits eventually (I mean, that makes sense right). But early on, it can be tough. In the meantime, you can always pretend to be dating a character from your favorite TV show (which one of my good friends continues to do — I swear it’s only half as creepy as it sounds).

5. You have wisdom and knowledge beyond your years

You can carry a conversation with your grandfather and other elders like it’s nothing. Indeed, your maturity sometimes gives you a kind of presence in the room that usually only comes with age and experience. If you are more enamored by the idea of acquiring wisdom and knowledge than you are about studying up on the Kardashians or England’s royal family, then you’re definitely on the right track.

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6. You have no qualms about being alone

While most people your age need to be around their peers and/or all sorts of forms of social medias, you are perfectly content with giving yourself a little bit of self-imposed solitary confinement. In truth, the majority of old souls are rather introverted (judging by how most millennials act, less interaction with the rest of our generation is probably a good thing).

7. You give everything a lot of thought

Old souls tend to be a bit less impulsive than others our age. If you’ve ever thought about the pros and cons of one item versus another for hours on end, then yeah, you’re probably an old soul.

In other words, you’re the person who will check out restaurant reviews on Yelp when all of your other friends are so starving that they’d be willing to eat just about anywhere. And while they might be mad about your restaurant-related waffling initially, they’ll certainly be thanking you once their food finally arrives. (See, we do have our uses!)

8. You are mystified by the rituals of your peers

I was always confused by the very concept of the traditional “college party.” Everybody gets drunk on cheap alcohol, and by the end of the night, nearly everyone has made some kind of questionable decision. Is that supposed to be fun? Am I crazy to think that it’s not? The few times I went to these things, I just couldn’t shake the feeling that I was taking part in something supremely ridiculous. (Which, now that I look back, is probably why I wasn’t invited to very many parties!)

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9. You aren’t into Facebook

Sure, you might have an account, and you may check it once in a while, but you don’t really care about how many friends you have or about updating your status. Same goes for other popular social medias, like Instagram and Twitter. It’s not that you necessarily consider them to be a waste of time, it’s just that for you, they’re dreadfully boring to work with.

10. You need frequent naps

Because old souls think like old people, they sometimes feel like them too. It’s a strange phenomenon, but as an old soul you often find yourself on your bed, catching a ten minute nap here, a twenty minute nap there. Is it because we, in our great wisdom, better understand the needs of our bodies? Or, perhaps being an old soul is a side effect of sleep deprivation? I’ll have to ask my scientist friends.

Due to both our frequent naps and relatively aloof, stoic nature, we often get accused of being “detached from reality.” I can assure you that this isn’t the case. We just happen to live in something of an alternate reality.

For the old soul, it isn’t about following the crowd. It’s about blazing our own trail and finding out what’s best for us — something the rest of our generation won’t figure out for at least another decade or two.

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So, now that you’ve read the signs, are you convinced that you are an old soul? Why or why not? Comment below!

Featured photo credit: introvert/Send me adrift. via flic.kr

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Last Updated on September 18, 2020

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

For the original article by Celestine: 13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

“We all have problems. The way we solve them is what makes us different.” ~Unknown

“It’s not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” – Hans Selye

Have you ever experienced moments when things just don’t go your way? For example, losing your keys, accidentally spilling your drink, waking up late, missing your buses/trains, forgetting to bring your things, and so on?

You’re not alone. All of us, myself included, experience times when things don’t go as we expect.

Here is my guide on how to deal with daily setbacks.

1. Take a step back and evaluate

When something bad happens, take a step back and evaluate the situation. Some questions to ask yourself:

  1. What is the problem?
  2. Are you the only person facing this problem in the world today?
  3. How does this problem look like at an individual level? A national level? On a global scale?
  4. What’s the worst possible thing that can happen to you as a result of this?
  5. How is it going to impact your life in the next 1 year? 5 years? 10 years?

Doing this exercise is not to undermine the problem or disclaiming responsibility, but to consider different perspectives, so you can adopt the best approach for it. Most problems we encounter daily may seem like huge issues when they crop up, but most, if not all, don’t have much impact in our life beyond that day.

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2. Vent if you have to, but don’t linger on the problem

If you feel very frustrated and need to let off some steam, go ahead and do that. Talk to a friend, complain, crib about it, or scream at the top of your lungs if it makes you happy.

At the same time, don’t get caught up with venting. While venting may temporarily relieve yourself, it’s not going to solve the problem ultimately. You don’t want to be an energy vampire.

Vent if there’s a need to, but do it for 15 to 20 minutes. Then move on.

3. Realize there are others out there facing this too

Even though the situation may be frustrating, you’re not alone. Remember there are almost 7 billion people in the world today, and chances are that other people have faced the same thing before too. Knowing it’s not just you helps you to get out of a self-victimizing mindset.

4. Process your thoughts/emotions

Process your thoughts/emotions with any of the four methods:

  1. Journal. Write your unhappiness in a private diary or in your blog. It doesn’t have to be formal at all – it can be a brain dump on rough paper or new word document. Delete after you are done.
  2. Audio taping. Record yourself as you talk out what’s on your mind. Tools include tape recorder, your PC (Audacity is a freeware for recording/editing audio) and your mobile (most mobiles today have audio recording functions). You can even use your voice mail for this. Just talking helps you to gain awareness of your emotions. After recording, play back and listen to what you said. You might find it quite revealing.
  3. Meditation. At its simplest form, meditation is just sitting/lying still and observing your reality as it is – including your thoughts and emotions. Some think that it involves some complex mambo-jumbo, but it doesn’t.
  4. Talking to someone. Talking about it with someone helps you work through the issue. It also gets you an alternate viewpoint and consider it from a different angle.

5. Acknowledge your thoughts

Don’t resist your thoughts, but acknowledge them. This includes both positive and negative thoughts.

By acknowledging, I mean recognizing these thoughts exist. So if say, you have a thought that says, “Wow, I’m so stupid!”, acknowledge that. If you have a thought that says, “I can’t believe this is happening to me again”, acknowledge that as well.

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Know that acknowledging the thoughts doesn’t mean you agree with them. It’s simply recognizing the existence of said thoughts so that you can stop resisting yourself and focus on the situation on hand.

6. Give yourself a break

If you’re very stressed out by the situation, and the problem is not time sensitive, then give yourself a break. Take a walk, listen to some music, watch a movie, or get some sleep. When you’re done, you should feel a lot more revitalized to deal with the situation.

7. Uncover what you’re really upset about

A lot of times, the anger we feel isn’t about the world. You may start off feeling angry at someone or something, but at the depth of it, it’s anger toward yourself.

Uncover the root of your anger. I have written a five part anger management series on how to permanently overcome anger.

After that, ask yourself: How can you improve the situation? Go to Step #9, where you define your actionable steps. Our anger comes from not having control on the situation. Sitting there and feeling infuriated is not going to change the situation. The more action we take, the more we will regain control over the situation, the better we will feel.

8. See this as an obstacle to be overcome

As Helen Keller once said,

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”

Whatever you’re facing right now, see it as an obstacle to be overcome. In every worthy endeavor, there’ll always be countless obstacles that emerge along the way. These obstacles are what separate the people who make it, and those who don’t. If you’re able to push through and overcome them, you’ll emerge a stronger person than before. It’ll be harder for anything to get you down in the future.

9. Analyze the situation – Focus on actionable steps

In every setback, there are going to be things that can’t be reversed since they have already occurred. You want to focus on things that can still be changed (salvageable) vs. things that have already happened and can’t be changed. The only time the situation changes is when you take steps to improve it. Rather than cry over spilt milk, work through your situation:

  1. What’s the situation?
  2. What’s stressing you about this situation?
  3. What are the next steps that’ll help you resolve them?
  4. Take action on your next steps!

After you have identified your next steps, act on them. The key here is to focus on the actionable steps, not the inactionable steps. It’s about regaining control over the situation through direct action.

10. Identify how it occurred (so it won’t occur again next time)

A lot of times we react to our problems. The problem occurs, and we try to make the best out of what has happened within the context. While developing a healthy coping mechanism is important (which is what the other helping points are on), it’s also equally important, if not more, to understand how the problem arose. This way, you can work on preventing it from taking place next time, vs. dealing reactively with it.

Most of us probably think the problem is outside of our control, but reality is most of the times it’s fully preventable. It’s just a matter of how much responsibility you take over the problem.

For example, for someone who can’t get a cab for work in the morning, he/she may see the problem as a lack of cabs in the country, or bad luck. However, if you trace to the root of the problem, it’s probably more to do with (a) Having unrealistic expectations of the length of time to get a cab. He/she should budget more time for waiting for a cab next time. (b) Oversleeping, because he/she was too tired from working late the previous day. He/she should allocate enough time for rest next time. He/she should also pick up better time management skills, so as to finish work in lesser time.

11. Realize the situation can be a lot worse

No matter how bad the situation is, it can always be much worse. A plus point vs. negative point analysis will help you realize that.

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12. Do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it

No matter how bad your situation may seem, do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it. Life is too beautiful to worry so much over daily issues. Take a step back (#1), give yourself a break if you need to (#6), and do what you can within your means (#9). Everything else will unfold accordingly. Worrying too much about the outcome isn’t going to change things or make your life any better.

13. Pick out the learning points from the encounter

There’s something to learn from every encounter. What have you learned from this situation? What lessons have you taken away?

After you identify your learning points, think about how you’re going to apply them moving forward. With this, you’ve clearly gained something from this encounter. You’ve walked away a stronger, wiser, better person, with more life lessons to draw from in the future.

Get the manifesto version of this article: [Manifesto] What To Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way

Featured photo credit: Alice Donovan Rouse via unsplash.com

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