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10 Misconceptions About Being in Love with An Introvert

10 Misconceptions About Being in Love with An Introvert

Many writers can relate with being an introvert. So it is something I am well aware of. The problem is that sometimes it is hard for others to figure us out. When you are in love with someone, you likely want to communicate with and treat them with care. Even when you are different than the person you love, you can be there for them. You are definitely lucky to love an introvert — many people find them to be better lovers than other types of people. Here are some common misconceptions about introverts and how to deal with them:

1. They are too quiet

Introverts are not quiet, they are processing. You should be concerned about what they have to say anytime they do say something. This is because introverts like to process their thoughts and take their time in spilling out words. Give them the opportunity to say as much as they can and do not be a constant interrupter. Allow them to think things through and give you their honest opinion.

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2. They demand your attention when they speak

It is not just about listening and offering them attention when they say something you should be concerned about what they have to say and make them know this. Try repeating what they have said and letting them know that you have been paying attention. Introverts want you to listen to you and prove you listened to what they said. They don’t mean this in a rude way.

3. They want to be ignored in a group

They may feel awkward and left out when they are in a group, especially among people who they have never met before. It is always considerate when you can involve them in a group discussion and acknowledging their presence by allowing them to start a topic of interest. An introvert may not be the first to jump into to a conversation but do like being included! Without these valuable personality types, we would be living in a loud, overwhelming world.

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4. They don’t appreciate grand gestures

Introverts will prefer to spend some quiet time alone with you and get the best out of your relationship rather than take you out on a big date with so many people. A grand gesture to them is different than having a large party celebrating a promotion or visiting a crowded place. To an introvert, a loving and grand gesture just might be a quiet date where they can spend time with someone they truly love. It is not as if they are shy or timid, they just want to get the best out of what they are familiar with.

5. They always want to write down their thoughts

Some introverts want to write down their thoughts because it gives them time to really thing. One of the best things about loving an introvert are the some amazing text messages, notes, or poems from them. Many introverts love to put their words on paper or in writing rather than just spilling them out. This does not mean they can’t communicate while speaking, it just means they prefer writing in many cases. So if you are finding it difficult communicating with them verbally, just let them do some writing for you.

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6. They like to sound smart

Don’t expect directionless chattering from an introvert. This is not because they want to sound smart or show off their intelligence, it is just that they do not prefer mindless conversations.  If you are concerned about them understand that aimless discussions will only put you on a back burner. They love abstract discussions, like who is your best philosopher, what really lives on Mars, what happens when we are asleep. They rarely talk about people who don’t matter or engage in gossips. They would prefer to be alone with their minds rather than be doing such. Loving an introvert can be challenging and fun!

7. They are good problem solvers

So rather than create problems for you, they would rather be looking for solutions for you. They are analytical and think things through. They could just be given you an inspired guess when they are put on the spot.

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8. They avoid you every once in a while

Being alone allows an introvert to recharge and should not be taken as a personal affront. Whether you want it or not, an introvert will need some time alone to deal with their personalities. Introverts are often introspective and may not be good sport at certain times since they use time alone to recharge their batteries.You might get boosted by other people while they only relax by gathering their thoughts, unwinding, or reading.

9. They can come across as snobs

It is easy to term them as snobs for their introverted nature because they do not always go out of their way to talk to people. An introvert isn’t being a snob, they just have a tough time coming out of their shell. It is easier for them to keep to themselves and be more comfortable in situations where they can keep to themselves. This doesn’t mean they are snobs or feel superior to others.

10. They are shy

There is a common perception that introverts are shy. They can do well in a social gathering it just depends on the situation they are facing. It is one thing to be quiet or shy and certainly it is another to appreciate solitude. Introverts try to tap into their internal energy by being alone. Even when they are in gathering they would love to recharge their energy at some point. They are not shy, it is just that being around people at certain times can be unsuitable to their nature. Loving an introvert can be very rewarding and pays off in the long-run.

Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on April 19, 2021

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

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5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go or motivated. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

Reference

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