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11 Signs You Are An Exceptionally Likeable Person (Even If You Don’t Feel You Are)

11 Signs You Are An Exceptionally Likeable Person (Even If You Don’t Feel You Are)

Being a likeable person brings you many benefits. People who are likeable often get more privileges in life. People enjoy being around you if you are likeable, and as a result, you are often being treated kindly. You gain more opportunities when you are likeable, because let’s face it, people enjoy giving opportunities to people they like. We can all learn to be likeable, if we are willing to make ourselves a better person.

Check out these 11 signs of an exceptionally likeable person:

1. They are genuine

Likeable people say what they mean, and they mean what they say. They are always honest to themselves and to others. They never try to be someone they are not.  People who appreciate honesty feel comfortable asking for their opinion, because they know that they will always tell them the truth.

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2. They are curious about others

Likeable people is very interested in what others have to share with them. They enjoy learning about others and value what they can learn from everyone. People love to share their stories and experiences with them because they know that they will be thrilled to hear their stories.

3. They are good listeners

Likeable people are always attentive to what people are telling them. They are not distracted or too eager to speak out when someone is sharing their stories or telling them something. People enjoy talking to them because they are always respectful to the person they are interacting with during conversations.

4. They are humble

To them, humility is the ability or the willingness to learn from others. They never hesitate to share the credit for the accomplishment they achieved. People like having them as their friend, because of their humbleness.

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5. They are always punctual

They are always on time for their meetings or appointments, because they respect the time of others. They organize their time effectively. People are pleased with their punctuality and are rest assured that they will always be on time for any occasion.

6. They are not judgemental

They understand that every individual is different, so they don’t criticize the choices other people make, even if those choices are very different from their personal preferences. People feel comfortable sharing their situation with them because they know that they will always respect their choices, and that they will never judge them or the decisions they make.

7. They are caring and helpful

They always lend a hand to the people who needed help if they are able. They care about others’ feelings and need. People come to them when they really needed help, because they know that they will try to help them as long as they are able to.

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8. They love to smile and are a positive thinker

They never fail to put on a smile when they come across someone. They lighten up the mood of others. They look at the good side instead of the bitter side of things. People feel happy or lighten up when they are interacting with them, because they possess a friendly and upbeat nature.

9. They are empathetic

They understand others’ suffering and are compassionate toward them. They always stand in others’ shoes and are able to feel others’ pain. People will put down their defenses and replace it with positive energy when dealing with them, because they are able to show them deep compassion.

10. They have an open heart

They are always willing to let others in. They know that only an open heart will allow them to be equal with others. People are willing to be more open to them because they have shown them that it is okay to be vulnerable.

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11. They are not attention seekers

They do not appreciate narcissism, therefore they don’t focus their time and efforts on seeking for attention from others. They rather use their time for productive activities, to gain more knowledge and learn new things. People like to hang with them because they know that they don’t have to be the audience of a narcissistic person.

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Crystie Lim

Life Coach

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Last Updated on August 4, 2020

The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

No!

It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here’s how to master the Gentle Art of Saying No:

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1. Value Your Time

Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”

2. Know Your Priorities

Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time?

For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.

3. Practice Saying No

Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.

4. Don’t Apologize

A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.

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5. Stop Being Nice

Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets.

Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.

6. Say No to Your Boss

Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no,” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning.

But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.

7. Pre-Empting

It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting,

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“Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”

8. Get Back to You

Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them:

“After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.”

At least you gave it some consideration.

9. Maybe Later

If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say,

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“This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].”

Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.

10. It’s Not You, It’s Me

This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often, the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time.

Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

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Featured photo credit: Kyle Glenn via unsplash.com

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