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10 Things To Remember If You Love a Dramatic Person

10 Things To Remember If You Love a Dramatic Person

Has anyone ever said to you outright, “you’re so dramatic?” Felt good, huh? No?  For some reason, I’ve always hated admitting that I like being dramatic. Have you ever tried to hide your dramatic side? Don’t — it’s hard to be full of passion, vigor, and well, sometimes perhaps too much emotion, but it’s a lot more fun too!

As much as I’ve tried to hide the impassioned side of me, it always finds a way to surface. As a theatre graduate, I spent four years with the most talented dramatic people around. We were crazy, but we were also showstoppers. Does that sound like you?

As a life coach, I see people apologizing for being dramatic left and right. Who said being dramatic was always a bad thing? Dramatic people know how to take charge of their lives, and that’s beautiful to witness! Know a dramatic person? Are you pushing yourself or them off the stage?

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Here are 10 things to remember if you love a dramatic person, and if you don’t, then give us a second chance. Why?

1.  They love hard

No one wants to be loved softly. Think about that… it sounds lame. Who wants a weak kiss right before bed? Who wants a soft pat on the butt? You want someone who’s going to fiercely love you. Sure, they’ll embarrass the hell out of you in public with too much PDA, but you’ll never feel more violated in a loving way. We’re always ready to hold your hand so you’ll never feel alone.

2.  They bring you out of your shell

Dramatic people always bring out the best in others. So many of us are wandering around wearing masks, afraid to show our faces. Dramatic people have no problem showing their true selves to the world. The world is their stage and if you’re part of their show then you better be ready to perform as well. They have an uncanny ability to draw people out of their comfort zones and in doing so, push them to experience all of life’s pleasures.

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3.  They live emotionally

According to Dr. John M. Oldham, “dramatic men and women live in an emotional world.” Sometimes you don’t want to hear all the drama, but hey, at least they’re willing to talk about it. Is it better to bottle up all the emotions until they spill over into some passive aggressive argument? No! Dramatic people express fully what they’re feeling in the moment.

4.  They entertain, even if you haven’t asked them to

Bored? Sad? Tired? Just give them a call and they’ll change your mood.  Research from The New Personality Self-Portrait shows that dramatic people love to be the center of attention. They’ll probably start singing for no good reason, ready to break up your mundane day. The best of the drama queens always have a tune running through their head. Why not share the joy? Everyone needs a little singing in his or her life. You can always count on them for entertainment.

5.   They are “fierce!”

In fact, it’s probably their favorite word! All day long they walk around and shout “fierce” whenever they’re “nailing it.” And they “nail it” everyday because they’ve gotta stay “fierce.” It’s a sick sweet cycle. Who doesn’t want to be “fierce?” Don’t apologize for your brilliance, the world needs more dramatic people like you to step into greatness. Note to self: just don’t get all cocky about it. Fierce humility is sexy!

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6.  They support your vision

Research shows that dramatic people “eagerly respond to new ideas,” according to The New Personality Self-Portrait. If you want some pumping up about your next big project, tell a dramatic person about it. Even better, if you want some help, tell a dramatic person about it. You’ll be hard pressed to find a dramatic person whose spirit is not willing to say “yes.” Speak passionately about your idea and you’ll have another soul warrior on your team. They will go the extra mile for you, they will put in the hard work, and they will impress! They will also be extremely resentful later on if you make them do too much. Speaking from experience here! Use them wisely; they are wiser than they look.

7.  They will charm your socks off, even if you’re wearing sandals

Want to feel amazing about yourself? Hang around a dramatic person. They’ll either compliment you up and down about your stylish new summer haircut, or want to know where you got your new clothes. First time meeting? A little shy? No worries, they always know what to say to make you smile. They’ll lift your spirits so high that you might come right out of your socks.

8.  They want your attention

Some people think this is annoying. But what’s the alternative? Cold, innaffectionate, and stand-offish? Nah, I’d rather have someone who’s always overly excited to see me. I know sometimes they want too much from you, but that’s just because they love you! Anything wrong with that? They promise not to drool!

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9.  They won’t ignore you

Isn’t it always nice to know they’re thinking about you? Admit it, you like the attention! A dramatic person will be the last person to ignore you because they can’t stand being ignored. They would rather talk to themselves then awkwardly sit in silence with you. Feeling lonely? Just go find someone talking to themselves, likely they’re a bit dramatic and would love to talk. And lastly…

10.  They are imagining the next big idea

Dramatic people tend to have “rich imaginations” according to Louis B. Morris and John M. Oldham. Imaginative ideas fly out of them almost as fast as they talk. Not only that, but they are readily willing to share their next blockbuster with anyone they come in contact with. Dramatic people have an infectious ability to inspire change in the world! Will you go along for the ride?

Featured photo credit: Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

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