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10 Things To Remember If You Love a Dramatic Person

10 Things To Remember If You Love a Dramatic Person

Has anyone ever said to you outright, “you’re so dramatic?” Felt good, huh? No?  For some reason, I’ve always hated admitting that I like being dramatic. Have you ever tried to hide your dramatic side? Don’t — it’s hard to be full of passion, vigor, and well, sometimes perhaps too much emotion, but it’s a lot more fun too!

As much as I’ve tried to hide the impassioned side of me, it always finds a way to surface. As a theatre graduate, I spent four years with the most talented dramatic people around. We were crazy, but we were also showstoppers. Does that sound like you?

As a life coach, I see people apologizing for being dramatic left and right. Who said being dramatic was always a bad thing? Dramatic people know how to take charge of their lives, and that’s beautiful to witness! Know a dramatic person? Are you pushing yourself or them off the stage?

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Here are 10 things to remember if you love a dramatic person, and if you don’t, then give us a second chance. Why?

1.  They love hard

No one wants to be loved softly. Think about that… it sounds lame. Who wants a weak kiss right before bed? Who wants a soft pat on the butt? You want someone who’s going to fiercely love you. Sure, they’ll embarrass the hell out of you in public with too much PDA, but you’ll never feel more violated in a loving way. We’re always ready to hold your hand so you’ll never feel alone.

2.  They bring you out of your shell

Dramatic people always bring out the best in others. So many of us are wandering around wearing masks, afraid to show our faces. Dramatic people have no problem showing their true selves to the world. The world is their stage and if you’re part of their show then you better be ready to perform as well. They have an uncanny ability to draw people out of their comfort zones and in doing so, push them to experience all of life’s pleasures.

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3.  They live emotionally

According to Dr. John M. Oldham, “dramatic men and women live in an emotional world.” Sometimes you don’t want to hear all the drama, but hey, at least they’re willing to talk about it. Is it better to bottle up all the emotions until they spill over into some passive aggressive argument? No! Dramatic people express fully what they’re feeling in the moment.

4.  They entertain, even if you haven’t asked them to

Bored? Sad? Tired? Just give them a call and they’ll change your mood.  Research from The New Personality Self-Portrait shows that dramatic people love to be the center of attention. They’ll probably start singing for no good reason, ready to break up your mundane day. The best of the drama queens always have a tune running through their head. Why not share the joy? Everyone needs a little singing in his or her life. You can always count on them for entertainment.

5.   They are “fierce!”

In fact, it’s probably their favorite word! All day long they walk around and shout “fierce” whenever they’re “nailing it.” And they “nail it” everyday because they’ve gotta stay “fierce.” It’s a sick sweet cycle. Who doesn’t want to be “fierce?” Don’t apologize for your brilliance, the world needs more dramatic people like you to step into greatness. Note to self: just don’t get all cocky about it. Fierce humility is sexy!

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6.  They support your vision

Research shows that dramatic people “eagerly respond to new ideas,” according to The New Personality Self-Portrait. If you want some pumping up about your next big project, tell a dramatic person about it. Even better, if you want some help, tell a dramatic person about it. You’ll be hard pressed to find a dramatic person whose spirit is not willing to say “yes.” Speak passionately about your idea and you’ll have another soul warrior on your team. They will go the extra mile for you, they will put in the hard work, and they will impress! They will also be extremely resentful later on if you make them do too much. Speaking from experience here! Use them wisely; they are wiser than they look.

7.  They will charm your socks off, even if you’re wearing sandals

Want to feel amazing about yourself? Hang around a dramatic person. They’ll either compliment you up and down about your stylish new summer haircut, or want to know where you got your new clothes. First time meeting? A little shy? No worries, they always know what to say to make you smile. They’ll lift your spirits so high that you might come right out of your socks.

8.  They want your attention

Some people think this is annoying. But what’s the alternative? Cold, innaffectionate, and stand-offish? Nah, I’d rather have someone who’s always overly excited to see me. I know sometimes they want too much from you, but that’s just because they love you! Anything wrong with that? They promise not to drool!

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9.  They won’t ignore you

Isn’t it always nice to know they’re thinking about you? Admit it, you like the attention! A dramatic person will be the last person to ignore you because they can’t stand being ignored. They would rather talk to themselves then awkwardly sit in silence with you. Feeling lonely? Just go find someone talking to themselves, likely they’re a bit dramatic and would love to talk. And lastly…

10.  They are imagining the next big idea

Dramatic people tend to have “rich imaginations” according to Louis B. Morris and John M. Oldham. Imaginative ideas fly out of them almost as fast as they talk. Not only that, but they are readily willing to share their next blockbuster with anyone they come in contact with. Dramatic people have an infectious ability to inspire change in the world! Will you go along for the ride?

Featured photo credit: Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

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Last Updated on July 20, 2021

How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

You’re standing behind the curtain, just about to make your way on stage to face the many faces half-shrouded in darkness in front of you. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body – your heartbeat has gone off the charts.

Don’t worry, you’re not the only one with glossophobia(also known as speech anxiety or the fear of speaking to large crowds). Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage.

Your body’s defence mechanism responds by causing a part of your brain to release adrenaline into your blood – the same chemical that gets released as if you were being chased by a lion.

Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you overcome your fear of public speaking:

1. Prepare yourself mentally and physically

According to experts, we’re built to display anxiety and to recognize it in others. If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. Hence, it’s important to prepare yourself before the big show so that you arrive on stage confident, collected and ready.

“Your outside world is a reflection of your inside world. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside.” – Bob Proctor

Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:

Warming up

If you’re nervous, chances are your body will feel the same way. Your body gets tense, your muscles feel tight or you’re breaking in cold sweat. The audience will notice you are nervous.

If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. It’s better to warm up before every speech as it helps to increase the functional potential of the body as a whole. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements.

Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time:

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  1. Neck and shoulder rolls – This helps relieve upper body muscle tension and pressure as the rolls focus on rotating the head and shoulders, loosening the muscle. Stress and anxiety can make us rigid within this area which can make you feel agitated, especially when standing.
  2. Arm stretches – We often use this part of our muscles during a speech or presentation through our hand gestures and movements. Stretching these muscles can reduce arm fatigue, loosen you up and improve your body language range.
  3. Waist twists – Place your hands on your hips and rotate your waist in a circular motion. This exercise focuses on loosening the abdominal and lower back regions which is essential as it can cause discomfort and pain, further amplifying any anxieties you may experience.

Stay hydrated

Ever felt parched seconds before speaking? And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out.

To prevent all that, it’s essential we stay adequately hydrated before a speech. A sip of water will do the trick. However, do drink in moderation so that you won’t need to go to the bathroom constantly.

Try to avoid sugary beverages and caffeine, since it’s a diuretic – meaning you’ll feel thirstier. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly.

Meditate

Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. ABC’s Dan Harris, co-anchor of Nightline and Good Morning America weekend and author of the book titled10% Happier , recommends that meditation can help individuals to feel significantly calmer, faster.

Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength.

Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage. The practice involves sitting comfortably, focusing on your breathing and then bringing your mind’s attention to the present without drifting into concerns about the past or future – which likely includes floundering on stage.

Here’s a nice example of guided meditation before public speaking:

2. Focus on your goal

One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure.

Do I look funny? What if I can’t remember what to say? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Does anyone care about what I’m talking about?’

Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose – contributing something of value to your audience.

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Decide on the progress you’d like your audience to make after your presentation. Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people.

If your own focus isn’t beneficial and what it should be when you’re speaking, then shift it to what does. This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart.[1]

3. Convert negativity to positivity

There are two sides constantly battling inside of us – one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities. Which one will you feed?

‘What if I mess up this speech? What if I’m not funny enough? What if I forget what to say?’

It’s no wonder why many of us are uncomfortable giving a presentation. All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy – a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is. If you think you’re incompetent, then it will eventually become true.

Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most. Say to yourself: “I’ll ace this speech and I can do it!”

Take advantage of your adrenaline rush to encourage positive outcome rather than thinking of the negative ‘what ifs’.

Here’s a video of Psychologist Kelly McGonigal who encourages her audience to turn stress into something positive as well as provide methods on how to cope with it:

4. Understand your content

Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about. One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech.

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However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. You’ll also risk sounding unnatural and less approachable.

“No amount of reading or memorizing will make you successful in life. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts.” – Bob Proctor

Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content – a definite way to stress themselves out.

Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner. Designing your slides to include text prompts is also an easy hack to ensure you get to quickly recall your flow when your mind goes blank.[2]

One way to understand is to memorize the over-arching concepts or ideas in your pitch. It helps you speak more naturally and let your personality shine through. It’s almost like taking your audience on a journey with a few key milestones.

5. Practice makes perfect

Like most people, many of us are not naturally attuned to public speaking. Rarely do individuals walk up to a large audience and present flawlessly without any research and preparation.

In fact, some of the top presenters make it look easy during showtime because they have spent countless hours behind-the-scenes in deep practice. Even great speakers like the late John F. Kennedy would spend months preparing his speech beforehand.

Public speaking, like any other skill, requires practice – whether it be practicing your speech countless of times in front of a mirror or making notes. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect!

6. Be authentic

There’s nothing wrong with feeling stressed before going up to speak in front of an audience.

Many people fear public speaking because they fear others will judge them for showing their true, vulnerable self. However, vulnerability can sometimes help you come across as more authentic and relatable as a speaker.

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Drop the pretence of trying to act or speak like someone else and you’ll find that it’s worth the risk. You become more genuine, flexible and spontaneous, which makes it easier to handle unpredictable situations – whether it’s getting tough questions from the crowd or experiencing an unexpected technical difficulty.

To find out your authentic style of speaking is easy. Just pick a topic or issue you are passionate about and discuss this like you normally would with a close family or friend. It is like having a conversation with someone in a personal one-to-one setting. A great way to do this on stage is to select a random audience member(with a hopefully calming face) and speak to a single person at a time during your speech. You’ll find that it’s easier trying to connect to one person at a time than a whole room.

With that said, being comfortable enough to be yourself in front of others may take a little time and some experience, depending how comfortable you are with being yourself in front of others. But once you embrace it, stage fright will not be as intimidating as you initially thought.

Presenters like Barack Obama are a prime example of a genuine and passionate speaker:

7. Post speech evaluation

Last but not the least, if you’ve done public speaking and have been scarred from a bad experience, try seeing it as a lesson learned to improve yourself as a speaker.

Don’t beat yourself up after a presentation

We are the hardest on ourselves and it’s good to be. But when you finish delivering your speech or presentation, give yourself some recognition and a pat on the back.

You managed to finish whatever you had to do and did not give up. You did not let your fears and insecurities get to you. Take a little more pride in your work and believe in yourself.

Improve your next speech

As mentioned before, practice does make perfect. If you want to improve your public speaking skills, try asking someone to film you during a speech or presentation. Afterwards, watch and observe what you can do to improve yourself next time.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself after every speech:

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  • How did I do?
  • Are there any areas for improvement?
  • Did I sound or look stressed?
  • Did I stumble on my words? Why?
  • Was I saying “um” too often?
  • How was the flow of the speech?

Write everything you observed down and keep practicing and improving. In time, you’ll be able to better manage your fears of public speaking and appear more confident when it counts.

If you want even more tips about public speaking or delivering a great presentation, check out these articles too:

Reference

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