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14 Ways Positive People Separate Themselves From Negative Energy

14 Ways Positive People Separate Themselves From Negative Energy

Negative energy can be found almost everywhere. There are people complaining about life constantly, practicing bad habits and bringing you down. The emotions they spread influence your thoughts and actions in a bad way so avoiding the sources of negative energy is obligatory if you want to be more successful.

Everyone can be easily affected by negative emotions and the only exceptions are people who learned how to deal with it. These 14 Ways will show you how positive people handle negativity so you can apply it to your life.

1. They create happiness from within.

Happy people don’t base their happiness on external stimulations. They realize once the stimulant is gone, their mood would be ruined. Instead, they look for internal sources of positive energy and practice mindfulness.

2. They practice positive thinking.

Thoughts influence your actions, so, if you think negatively, there’s no bright future ahead of you. Positive people don’t believe in the excuses their minds come up with. Through positive affirmations and finding the good side of any problem, they make sure they are mentally set up for success.

3. They look for reasons to believe in themselves.

“Never let the negativity get to you. There are gonna be a lot of people you have to plow through, but as long you believe in yourself, that’s all that matters.” – Becky G.

There are endless reasons to believe in yourself even if you feel completely helpless and worthless. These negative thoughts are temporary obstacles and most of the time, they are made-up.

4. They cut off negative people.

Your surroundings have a tremendous impact on yourself. If you spend time with positive people, you are more likely to be happy and content. On the other hand, if you are too close to naysayers and complainers, you will have a hard time removing the negativity from your life.

Use these 9 tips to deal with negative people.

5. They train regularly.

Physical training is associated with releasing endorphins which are responsible for “feeling good.” Treating your body the right way pays off and results in reduced stress and boosted happiness. On the other hand, if you ignore your body’s needs, it will let you experience the negative consequences soon enough.

6. They spend time in the nature.

Being in the nature clears your mind and relaxes your body. Positive people dedicate a part of their day to get outside and admire the beauty of our planet. It’s a great way to load your batteries!

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7. They avoid impulsive spending.

Nowadays, extra deals and sales fight for your attention, so it’s easy to end up lost in the buying mode. Whereas excessive buying may make you feel better instantly, from a long-term perspective, it’s an unhealthy habit positive people avoid at all costs. They would rather invest in experiences to discover the world and create some great memories.

8. They accept failure.

Positive people embrace failure as they realize it’s the only way to learn and grow. Whenever they collapse, they work hard to get at the top again instead of giving up. Even though a failure brings negative emotions, they comprehend these are brief and will fade away quickly. To accelerate the process, they keep thinking positively.

9. They take full responsibility.

Positive people always give themselves the responsibility for what happens in their lives. Whether it’s a success or failure, it’s always an effect of their actions and thoughts. A positive person will never blame external factors and focus on things within the reach that could be improved.

By doing that, they pursue being better and experience constant progress instead of getting frustrated by things out of their control.

10. They learn to control their thoughts.

A mind can be easily brought out of control by sudden negative thoughts. Positive individuals know if they don’t control their thoughts, they will lose control over their actions and behaviors. For this reason, they practice mind control, for example through meditation.

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11. They devote some time to relax.

Instead of trying to be perfect, positive people realize sometimes you need to slow down, make your goals and ambitions secondary and simply loosen up. By doing this, they avoid burning out which would cause unnecessary negative energy.

In a nutshell, they take a step back to move further the next day.

12. They believe there’s always a solution.

Sometimes, life hits you hopelessly hard. At these moments, you tend to doubt your abilities to solve the current problem. The fact is, there’s always a way to overcome an obstacle and positive people keep that in mind. Even if they reach rock bottom, they believe it happens so they can get to the top even stronger.

13. They know when to say no.

The value of saying ‘no’ and ‘yes’ at the right moment is priceless. Opposed to misconceptions, these two words have an immense power and how you use them dictates what happens in your life.

Positive people focus on their priorities instead pleasing others. That’s why they know there are many things you don’t need to say yes to.

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14. They don’t look for anyone’s approval.

If you let others’ opinions paralyze you, you will have a hard time feeling good and happy. Many people are afraid of not getting validation and being criticized. Positive individuals think and act quite the opposite.

They use disapproval as an indicator of being authentic and true. The fact is, there are countless things you don’t need anyone’s approval for though you think you do.

Featured photo credit: web4camguy via flickr.com

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Oskar Nowik

Oskar is a blogger and the author of "Brightening: The Positive Attitude That Will Change Your Life"

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Published on September 23, 2020

6 Effective Negotiation Skills to Master

6 Effective Negotiation Skills to Master

I don’t know about you, but many times when I hear the word negotiate I think of lawyers working out a business deal or having to do battle with a car salesman to try to get a lower price. Since I am in recruiting, the term “negotiation” comes up when someone is attempting to get a higher compensation package.

If we think about it, we tend to negotiate almost every day in a wide variety of things we do. Getting a handle on the important negotiation skills can be incredibly beneficial in many parts of our lives. Let’s take a look at 6 effective negotiation skills to master.

What is Negotiation?

First, let’s take a look at what negotiation is. Put simply, negotiation is a method by which people settle their differences. It is a process in which compromise or agreement can be reached without argument or dispute.

Anytime two people or sides disagree on something, they are almost always looking for the best possible outcome for their side. This could be from an individual’s perspective or someone representing an organization.

In reality, it’s rare that one side gets everything they want and the other side gets nothing that they are seeking. Seeking to reach a common ground of sorts where both sides feel like they are getting most of what they want is the key to being successful and maintaining the relationship.

Places We Negotiate

I’ve mentioned that we negotiate in just about all phases of our life. For those of you who are shaking your head no, I invite you to think about the following:

1. Work/Business

This one is the most obvious and it’s what naturally comes to mind when we think of the word “negotiate”.

When you first started at your current job, you might have asked for a higher salary. It could be that you delivered a huge new client to your company and used this as leverage in your most recent evaluation for more compensation. If you work with vendors (and just about every company does), maybe you worked them to a lower price or better contract terms.

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In recruiting, I negotiate with candidates and hiring managers all the time to land the best talent I can find. It’s very common to accept additional work with the (sometimes spoken, sometimes unspoken) agreement that it will benefit your career in the future.

Recently, I took over a project that was my boss was working on so that I would be able to attend a conference later in the year. And so it goes, we do this all day long at work.

2. Personal

I don’t know about you, but I negotiate with my spouse all the time. I’ll cook dinner with the understanding that she does the dishes. Who wants to mow the lawn and who wants to vacuum and dust the house?

I think we should save 10% for retirement, but she thinks 5% is plenty. Therefore, we save 8%. And don’t even get me started with my kids. My older daughter can borrow my car as soon as she finishes her chores. My younger daughter can go hang out with her friends when her homework is done.

Then, there are all those interactions in our personal lives outside our homes. The carpenter wants to charge me $12,000 to build a new deck. I think $10,000 is plenty so we agree on $11,000. I ask my neighbor if I can borrow his snowblower in the winter if I invite him over the next time I grill steak. And so on.

3. Ourselves

You didn’t expect this one, did you? We negotiate with ourselves all day long.

I’ll make sure I don’t skip my workout tomorrow since I’m going to have that extra piece of pizza. My spouse has been quiet the last few days, is it worth me asking her about, or should I leave it alone? I think the car place charged me for some repairs that weren’t needed, should I say something or just let it go? I know my friend has been having some personal challenges, should I check in with him? We’ve been friends for a long time, I’m sure he’d come to me if he needed help. I’ve got the #4 pick in this year’s Fantasy Football draft, should I choose a running back or a wide receiver?

Think about that non-stop voice inside your head. It always seems to be chattering away about something and many times, it’s us negotiating with ourselves. I’ll finish up that report that the boss needs before I turn on the football game.

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Why Negotiation Skills Are So Important

Put simply, negotiation skills are important because we all interact with other people, and not only other people but other organizations and groups of people as well.

We all rarely want the same thing or outcome. Most of the time a vendor is looking at getting you to pay a higher price for something than you want to spend. Therefore, it’s important to negotiate to some middle ground that works well for both sides.

My wife and I disagree on how much to save for retirement. If we weren’t married it wouldn’t be an issue. We’d each contribute how much we wanted to on our retirement funds. We choose to be married, so we have to come to some agreement that we both feel comfortable with. We have to compromise. Therefore, we have to negotiate.

If we each lived on a planet by ourselves, we would be free to do just about anything we wanted to. We wouldn’t have to compromise with anyone because we wouldn’t interact with anyone. We would make every choice unilaterally the way we wanted to.

As we all know, this isn’t how things are. We are constantly interacting with other people and organizations, each one with their own agenda’s, viewpoints, and opinions. Therefore, we have to be able to work together.

6 Negotiation Skills to Master

Having strong negotiation skills helps us create win-win situations with others, allowing us to get most of what we want in conjunction with others around us.

Now, let’s look at 6 effective negotiation skills to master.

1. Preparation

Preparation is a key place to start with when getting ready to negotiate. Being prepared means having a clear vision of what you want and how you’d go about achieving it. It means knowing what the end goal looks like and also what you are willing to give to get it.

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It also means knowing who you are negotiating with and what areas they might be willing to compromise on. You should also know what your “bottom line” is. By “bottom line” I mean what is the most you are willing to give up to get what you want.

For instance, several years ago, I decided it was time to get a newer car. I say newer because I wanted a “new to me” car, not a brand new car. I did my research and figured out what type of car I wanted. I decided on what must-have items on the car I wanted, the highest amount of miles that would already be on it, the colors I was willing to get it in, and the highest amount of money I was willing to pay.

After visiting numerous car dealerships I was able to negotiate buying a car. I knew what I was willing to give up (amount of money) and what I was willing to accept, things like the color, amount of miles, etc. I came prepared. This is critical.

2. Clear Communication

The next key skill you need to be an effective negotiator is clear communication. You have to be able to clearly articulate what you want to the other party. This means both clear verbal and written communication.

If you can’t clearly tell the other person what you want, how do you expect to get it? Have you ever worked through something with a vendor or someone else only to learn of a surprise right at the end that wasn’t talked about before? This is not what you would call clear communication. It’s essential to be able to share a coherent and logical vision with the person you are working with.

3. Active Listening

Let’s do a quick review of active listening. This is when you are completely focused on the speaker, understand their message, comprehend the information, and respond appropriately. This is a necessary ingredient to be able to negotiate successfully. You must be able to fully focus on the other person’s wants to completely understand them.

If you aren’t giving them your full attention, you may miss some major points or details. This leads to frustration down the road on both sides. Ensure you are employing your active listening skills when in arbitration mode.

4. Teamwork and Collaboration

To be able to get to a place of common ground and a win-win scenario, you have to have a sense of teamwork and collaboration.

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If you are only thinking about yourself and what you want without giving much care to what the other person is wanting, you are bound to wind up without a solution. The other person may get frustrated and give up if they see you are unwilling to meet them halfway or care little for what they want.

When you collaborate, you are working together to help each other get what is most important to you. The other upside to negotiating with a sense of teamwork and collaboration is that it helps create a sense of trust, which, in turn, helps provide positive energy for working to a successful conclusion.

5. Problem Solving

Problem-solving is another key negotiation skill. When you are working with the other person to get the deal done many times you’ll face new challenges along the way.

Maybe you want a new vendor to provide training on the software they are selling you but they say it’s going to cost an additional $20,000 to provide this service. If you don’t have the additional $20,000 in the budget to spend on the software but you feel the training is critical, how are you going to solve that problem?

From what I’ve seen, most vendors aren’t willing to provide additional services without getting paid for them. This is where problem-solving skills will help continue the discussions. You might suggest to the vendor that your company will also be looking to replace their financial software next year, and you’d be happy to ensure they get one of the first seats at the table when the time comes if they could perhaps lower the pricing on their training.

There’s a solution to most challenges, but it takes problem-solving skills to work through them effectively.

6. Decision-Making Ability

Finally, having strong decision-making ability will help you seal the deal when you get to a place where everyone feels like they are getting what works for them. Each step of the way you can cross off the list when you get what you are looking for and decide to move onto the next item. Then, once you have all of your must-have boxes checked and the other side feels good about things, it’s time to shake hands and sign on the dotted line. Powerful decision-making ability will help you get to the finish line together.

Conclusion

There you have it, 6 effective negotiation skills to master to lead a more fulfilling life. Once we realize that we negotiate in one form or another almost every day in every phase of our lives, we realize how critical a skill it is.

Possessing strong negotiation skills will help you in nearly every one of your relationships at both the workplace and in your personal life. If you feel your arbitration tools could use some sharpening, try some of the 6 effective negotiation skills to master that we’ve talked about.

More Tips to Improve Your Negotiation Skills

Featured photo credit: Windows via unsplash.com

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