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5 Ways To Transform That ‘Rut’ You’re Stuck In Into The Best Thing That’s Ever Happened To You

5 Ways To Transform That ‘Rut’ You’re Stuck In Into The Best Thing That’s Ever Happened To You

We’ve all been there – dumped just before our exams, burgled just after buying that new Plasma, or given a bad haircut just in time for an all important first date. We’ve all had that delayed train before a job interview and gone to bed at 6pm, face down in the pillow, very ready to give up to that blissful world of the unconscious. But ladies, gents, folks  – there are five ways you can turn that concave rut upside down into the hill that’s going to raise you above the clouds.

1. The Bounce Back

Who says you have to sit back and take it? You get dumped, you jump straight back onto that Tinder bandwagon or that loco Happn train. You haven’t lost what you loved – you’ve dodged a bullet and opened yourself up to a whole world of possibilities. You don’t have to stay in and snuggle on Saturdays (grossss) you can go wild on the town, meet new people, make new memories. You can be Miss or Master Independent, the magician of your own destiny. Just look how strong you are.

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2. New Hobbies

So life’s lost a bit of colour lately? You need some new paint pots. How about a life drawing class? Or maybe a weekly pub quiz with your favourites? Whatever it is, a swing dance class every week, a bit of Dungeons and Dragons, maybe you want to join a sex circus – no judgement here, the worst thing you can do is shove it to the back of the pile. Throw yourself into it and embrace a whole new world of different.

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3. Make lists

Be careful with this one, because there is a thin line between a few post it notes and a 50 page Word Document (that way madness lies…) But if you’re struggling to see what you’re worth, a post it note every day can prove a whole host of talents you hadn’t even noticed in yourself. Tick off your achievements, whether it’s finally ordering that stupid hat your mate wants for her birthday, or applying for that position you really want, or taking the leap and asking bus babe for those all important digits – whatever the goal, take steps to get things done and you’ll be amazed at how much you can do.

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4. Find your friends

When you’ve fallen down a pit, sometimes the only way to really climb out is with a little help. We’ve all had those friends and those more than friends who have dropped us. So use this time to discover which hands reach in to pull you back out – the rut is not a fun place to be, but at least it can help you to discover some harsh truths. The ones who text you every day, who offer those important phone calls, who are planning things to get you excited about – these are the people you need in your life. When you’re low, always take a moment to remember these little jewels in your social calendars and your message inbox and you’ll suddenly remember that you’re not in a rut at all.

5. Travel

It can take a lot to push someone into travelling. It’s a scary business – all that hard work to save up for those outrageous flight costs, the strangers you will encounter, the signs and the ingredients lists in a language that you just don’t understand – it all takes guts and energy. Use your rut to launch yourself into something totally new. Don’t run away from your problems (you’ve booked a return flight, remember…) but why not see the world, get some fresh perspective and discover new things about yourself? There’s no need to let things weigh you down. Get angry, get determined, and use that adrenaline to face your fears and explore what life really has to offer.

Featured photo credit: Stockpic – Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

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Last Updated on April 8, 2020

11 Things Overachievers Do Differently

11 Things Overachievers Do Differently

We all know some overachievers: supermoms who manage to get online degrees between cleaning, cooking, and taking kids to practice; students who write 10-page papers when the directions call for 4; managers whose resumes look more like pages from the Guinness book of Records.

How do they do it all? How is it possible that one person can graduate at the top of their class, found an orphanage in India, run 30k marathons, write a best-selling book, travel all over the world and learn to speak Mandarin Chinese while having a full-time job?

What’s the secret of an overachiever? Here’re 11 things overachievers do differently that you can learn from.

1. They Know How to Manage Their Time

It’s pretty simple actually – you can never become an overachiever if you don’t know how to organize your time efficiently.

The great thing is that overachievers are ready to share their knowledge and time management talent with the rest of the world. Read The 4-Hour Workweek or The 4-Hour Body by Timothy Ferriss, and you’ll know what I’m talking about.

2. They Don’t Spend Hours Watching TV or Playing Computer Games

Mostly because they have better things to do, like exercising, reading, spending an evening with their family or volunteering to work in the local soup kitchen. Their philosophy is simple – the world is full of wonderful things to try, explore and experience. Watching TV is not one of them.

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3. They Are Obsessed With Perfection

Imagine Steve Jobs’ work approach and you’ll understand the level of perfection and painfully high standards that overachievers set for themselves and those around them. Often it pays off (especially if they focus on just one domain). But sometimes compulsive over-striving turns into a sure-fire road to disappointments and unfinished tasks.

Learn how to strike a balance: How Not to Let Perfectionism Secretly Screw You Up

4. They Know How To Inspire

Overachievers learn quickly that it is much easier to achieve goals through collaboration (and especially delegation). So they know how to inspire, encourage, persuade and motivate people around them. Even though they often drive their team crazy with their stubbornness and perfectionism, people quickly follow under the spell of their enthusiasm and greater vision.

Learn these 10 Powerful Ways to Influence People Positively.

5. They Set Clear Goals

The term “overachiever” itself implies that they know how to achieve goals. That is kind of hard to do if your goals are vague, unclear and lack specific deadline, which is why overachievers educate themselves, read goal-setting books, and think about the best way to approach a new task.

Although, it’s worth mentioning that overachievers usually use their time management and goal-setting skills towards competitive, “I want to kick butt” type of goals rather than self-improvement, mastery goals.

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Take a look at these tips to help you set clearer goals: What Are SMART Goals (And How to Use Them to Become Successful)

6. They Are Organized

It’s hard to imagine a disorganized overachiever, isn’t it? Their great organizational and planning skills usually serve three main purposes: keeping track of time, keeping track of progress and keeping track of achievements.

This hasn’t been confirmed by scientific research yet, but overachievers might actually get a “runner’s high” from crossing tasks off their to-do lists, and making new to-do lists.

Here’s How to Organize Your Life: 10 Habits of Really Organized People

7. They Try to Avoid Failure at All Costs

Some psychologists believe that overachievers place their self-worth on their competence, driven by an underlying fear of failure. Rather than setting and striving for goals based on a pure desire to achieve, their core motivation becomes avoiding failure. This may explain the fact that overachiever beat themselves up for even little setbacks and seemingly-insignificant mistakes.

But be aware that having a strong fear of failure can wrek havoc your productivity. So the best thing to do? Learn to conquer the fear: Why You Have the Fear of Failure (And How to Conquer It)

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8. They Love Awards

Who doesn’t love them, right? True enough, but unlike most people who like to feel acknowledged and appreciated for their efforts, overachievers are bent on collecting ‘awards’, be it university degrees, spelling bee prizes or unusual destinations.

While loving awares isn’t bad, it’s even better if you’re driven by internal motivation instead of external ones which could be quite uncontrolable or unstable: Why Is Internal Motivation So Powerful (And How to Find It).

9. They Don’t Understand the Concept of Work Hours

Don’t get surprised if you receive a work-related email anywhere between 8 p.m. and midnight. It’s something overachievers usually do and you weren’t the only one. At least 20 more emails have been sent during these hours to other people. The concepts of over-achieving and working overtime usually go hand in hand.

The downside of this is an imbalnced life, which may need to problems in other aspects of life including health and relationships. A better way is to Achieve a Realistic Work Life Balance.

10. They Rest

Overachievers might often be labeled as “workaholics”, because they often ignore bodily signs of hunger, fatigue and even a full bladder, hoping to finish just one last little part. This doesn’t mean that overachievers don’t know how to disconnect and relax.

True that they tend to work in the highest gear, but they also have enough sense to give themselves time to rest and recharge. Of course, they do it in their own overachieving way, preferring climbing Mount Kilimanjaro or hiking through the Amazon jungle to lazing on the beach.

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11. Overachievers Continuously Educate Themselves

A great quality that most overachievers have is the hunger for knowledge. They surround themselves with bright people. They know how to listen, and most importantly, they get tons of mentoring.

Despite the fact that overachievers want to excel at everything they set their minds on, they are humble enough to admit that to get on top of their game, they need help. And they are willing to pay someone to push, coach and guide them.

You too can learn How to Create a Habit of Continuous Learning for a Better You.

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Featured photo credit: Nghia Le via unsplash.com

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