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5 Ways To Transform That ‘Rut’ You’re Stuck In Into The Best Thing That’s Ever Happened To You

5 Ways To Transform That ‘Rut’ You’re Stuck In Into The Best Thing That’s Ever Happened To You

We’ve all been there – dumped just before our exams, burgled just after buying that new Plasma, or given a bad haircut just in time for an all important first date. We’ve all had that delayed train before a job interview and gone to bed at 6pm, face down in the pillow, very ready to give up to that blissful world of the unconscious. But ladies, gents, folks  – there are five ways you can turn that concave rut upside down into the hill that’s going to raise you above the clouds.

1. The Bounce Back

Who says you have to sit back and take it? You get dumped, you jump straight back onto that Tinder bandwagon or that loco Happn train. You haven’t lost what you loved – you’ve dodged a bullet and opened yourself up to a whole world of possibilities. You don’t have to stay in and snuggle on Saturdays (grossss) you can go wild on the town, meet new people, make new memories. You can be Miss or Master Independent, the magician of your own destiny. Just look how strong you are.

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2. New Hobbies

So life’s lost a bit of colour lately? You need some new paint pots. How about a life drawing class? Or maybe a weekly pub quiz with your favourites? Whatever it is, a swing dance class every week, a bit of Dungeons and Dragons, maybe you want to join a sex circus – no judgement here, the worst thing you can do is shove it to the back of the pile. Throw yourself into it and embrace a whole new world of different.

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3. Make lists

Be careful with this one, because there is a thin line between a few post it notes and a 50 page Word Document (that way madness lies…) But if you’re struggling to see what you’re worth, a post it note every day can prove a whole host of talents you hadn’t even noticed in yourself. Tick off your achievements, whether it’s finally ordering that stupid hat your mate wants for her birthday, or applying for that position you really want, or taking the leap and asking bus babe for those all important digits – whatever the goal, take steps to get things done and you’ll be amazed at how much you can do.

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4. Find your friends

When you’ve fallen down a pit, sometimes the only way to really climb out is with a little help. We’ve all had those friends and those more than friends who have dropped us. So use this time to discover which hands reach in to pull you back out – the rut is not a fun place to be, but at least it can help you to discover some harsh truths. The ones who text you every day, who offer those important phone calls, who are planning things to get you excited about – these are the people you need in your life. When you’re low, always take a moment to remember these little jewels in your social calendars and your message inbox and you’ll suddenly remember that you’re not in a rut at all.

5. Travel

It can take a lot to push someone into travelling. It’s a scary business – all that hard work to save up for those outrageous flight costs, the strangers you will encounter, the signs and the ingredients lists in a language that you just don’t understand – it all takes guts and energy. Use your rut to launch yourself into something totally new. Don’t run away from your problems (you’ve booked a return flight, remember…) but why not see the world, get some fresh perspective and discover new things about yourself? There’s no need to let things weigh you down. Get angry, get determined, and use that adrenaline to face your fears and explore what life really has to offer.

Featured photo credit: Stockpic – Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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