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How To Make Your Family Business Work

How To Make Your Family Business Work

Everybody has come into contact with a family-run business at some point. Whether it be the local hardware store, a painting and decorating company, or your accountant, they exist in every sector.

There is no better way to pass on a legacy than to pass on your life’s work to your children. Though the questions are: is it really that simple to run a family business, and how can it be successful?

I chose to explore this issue as my sister and I are currently in a similar situation. But please note: though I will use the term family business throughout the article, the advice below applies to both businesses run by family and those run by friends, too.

Why would you want to start a family business?

So you’ve got a great idea for a business and you want to get it up and running, but you cannot do it alone. Who do you trust? Although family and friends may not have the right skills required for the job, there is already an ingrained sense of trust between you. This makes it much easier to share your ideas and research with them, and get started on building your dream. Skills can be much more readily learned than trust gained between two parties, especially at such an early stage in the development of an idea.

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From a different angle, a family business may be exactly what your relationship needs; a common ground that you can both talk about and share to build and develop a relationship that’s been drifting apart. Commercially, a family business also has a certain appeal about it. When you pop down to the local butcher and see “Michaels & Sons” over the door, you feel an instant warmth and connection towards the store. People in family-run businesses tend to value each other, their product, and their customers.

Another way family businesses can pop up is through a shared passion. You may be out having a drink, chatting away, when you both—mildly inebriated, maybe—consider the prospect of going into business together.

Hey, that’s a great idea! Why don’t we just get a little cash together, buy some stock, and just do it? It’ll be fun, and we can do it, no problem!

Many people have had a conversation similar to this but never get round to doing it, or question their optimism the day after. However, if the passion has not faded by the time you’ve recovered in the morning, then this shared motivation may be the perfect way to get the ball rolling. Having someone constantly inspiring you, and making sure you are doing what is necessary, can be a great benefit when starting out. Plus the added responsibility of another party makes the desire to succeed that little bit more important.

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There are also several logistical and financial benefits to family businesses. Family can provide you with low- or no-cost labor, helping maintain the day to day whilst allowing you to concentrate on expansion or development. Also, if ever in need of a short-term or quick loan, family or friends may be able to provide you with a low- or no-interest loan to keep you afloat. However, it is important to be careful with the latter, as these loans can make or break relationships.

What do you need to consider?

Now you have the idea, the hardest part is to put the whole thing into play. This is where the real blood, sweat, and family feuds start to take place. Be prepared for a bumpy ride because starting your own venture alone is a rocky process, and can be exacerbated by the inclusion of close ones. So, here are a few things that you should really consider:

1. Have you worked together before? Whether it be a school project a few years back, or a little charity stall to raise some money for the Scouts, if you have worked successfully and positively with the person before, that can make the whole journey a lot smoother. If you know each other’s traits, the best ways to communicate and delegate tasks, and even have complete faith in one another to deliver, it can be a huge burden of doubt relieved. If you haven’t worked together before, maybe just reflect on the last time you worked alongside someone and the issues you had or the things that worked well, in order to get an understanding of what is best for you all. If you both do something like this and go through the ideas with each other, it can lay the foundation for a healthy working relationship.

2. You clock in, you’re partners. You clock out, you’re family. This is the one that is often the hardest to overcome. In the end, you both have the desire and ambition to succeed with your idea—that’s brilliant. Though sometimes people can start to slack or lose passion. It is crucial to remember that you should be looking out for what is best for the company as well as yourselves. If you have some personal problems that crop up, make sure you highlight these and look for ways to address them: take a back seat and allow someone else to help out, or switch the tasks you do so that you can work more from home.

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However, there can come times when very difficult decisions need to be made, even to the point that considering the resignation of one member of the business, maybe even your own, is on the table. If it comes to this, it is important to highlight that it is not a personal decision and try to prevent damaging the relationship that existed prior to going into business together. This is obviously the worst situation one can be in, and hopefully you will never get into such an extreme position.

Fortunately, conflicts can often be resolved, depending on the relationship, and the ability to have such a lenient working environment can be very useful. For example, you could arrange between you flexible times of work that allow you to attend your weekly Pilates class, or pick the kids up from school.

3. Keep your finances in check. Everyone may be raring to get involved, and be adding to the investment fund to get the idea’s blood pumping. Make sure you consider not only the future of the business, but the future of yourselves. Where do your finances look to be six months, two years down the line? If the situation does not look good, then someone should probably consider a stable income external to the venture. By removing the burden of financial security from the venture, it allows for riskier growth strategies, greater flexibility within the company finances, and most importantly, peace of mind.

4. Take a break. You may be the best of friends, but there are going to be times when you need a break from each other. This is vital to retaining a healthy working and personal relationship. Perhaps schedule days where only one of you is in the office, or take a weekend away, refraining from all business calls and emails. Not only will this further develop the trust in your partner to lead and manage the venture, but it will also give you a break from each other and allow you time to reflect on other areas of your life. As much as you may enjoy the risk and reward of a venture, there are other areas of your life that need some attention, too.

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Now that you have done your homework, it is time to crack on with writing that business plan, and launching your idea. I wish you the best of luck with your endeavors, and would be pleased to hear any stories of attempts and—hopefully—success!

Featured photo credit: ThinkStock via i.huffpost.com

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Last Updated on November 5, 2020

Why You Have the Fear of Failure (And How to Overcome It)

Why You Have the Fear of Failure (And How to Overcome It)

Nobody enjoys failing. Fear of failure can be so strong that avoiding failure eclipses the motivation to succeed. Insecurity about doing things incorrectly causes many people to unconsciously sabotage their chances for success.

Fear is part of human nature. As an entrepreneur, I faced this same fear. My ego and identity became intertwined with my work, and when things didn’t go as planned, I completely shut down. I overcame this unhealthy relationship with fear, and I believe that you can, too.

Together we’ll examine how you can use failure to your advantage instead of letting it run your life. We’ll also look at how to overcome fear of failure so that you can enjoy success in your work and life.

What Is Fear of Failure?

If you are afraid of failure, it will cause you to avoid potentially harmful situations.

Fear of failure keeps you from trying, creates self-doubt, stalls progress, and may lead you to go against your morals.

What causes a fear of failure? Here are the main reasons why fear of failing exists:

Patterns From Childhood

Hyper-critical adults cause children to internalize damaging mindsets.[1] They establish ultimatums and fear-based rules. This causes children to feel the constant need to ask for permission and reassurance. They carry this need for validation into adulthood.

Perfectionism

Perfectionism is often at the root of a fear of failure.[2] For perfectionists, failure is so terrible and humiliating that they don’t try. Stepping outside your comfort zone becomes terrifying.

Over-Personalization

The ego may lead us to over-identify with failures. It’s hard to look beyond failure at things like the quality of the effort, extenuating circumstances, or growth opportunities.[3]

False Self-Confidence

People with true confidence know they won’t always succeed. A person with fragile self-confidence avoids risks. They’d rather play it safe than try something new.[4]

How the Fear of Failure Holds You Back

Unhealthy Organization Culture

Too many organizations today have cultures of perfection: a set of organizational beliefs that any failure is unacceptable. Only pure, untainted success will do.

Imagine the stress and terror in an organization like that. The constant covering up of the smallest blemishes. The wild finger-pointing as everyone tries to shift the blame for the inevitable messes onto someone else. The lying, cheating, falsification of data, and hiding of problems—until they become crises that defy being hidden any longer.

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Miss out on Valuable Opportunities

If some people fail to reach a complete answer because of the lure of some early success, many more fail because of their ego-driven commitment to what worked in the past. You often see this with senior people, especially those who made their names by introducing some critical change years ago.

They shy away from further innovation, afraid that this time they might fail, diminishing the luster they try to keep around their names from past triumph.

Besides, they reason, the success of something new might even prove that those achievements they made in the past weren’t so great after all. Why take the risk when you can hang on to your reputation by doing nothing?

Such people are so deeply invested in their egos and the glories of their past that they prefer to set aside opportunities for future glory rather than risk even the possibility of failure.

High Achievers Become Losers

Every talent contains an opposite that sometimes turns it into a problem. Successful people like to win and achieve high standards. This can make them so terrified of failure that it ruins their lives. When a positive trait, like achievement, becomes too strong in someone’s life, it’s on the way to becoming a major obstacle.

Achievement is a powerful value for many successful people. They’ve built their lives on it. They achieve at everything they do: school, college, sports, the arts, hobbies, work. Each fresh achievement adds to the power of the value in their lives.

Gradually, failure becomes unthinkable. Maybe they’ve never failed yet in anything that they’ve done, so they have no experience of rising above it. Failure becomes the supreme nightmare: a frightful horror they must avoid at any cost.

The simplest way to do this is never to take a risk, stick rigidly to what you know you can do, protect yourself, work the longest hours, double and triple check everything, and be the most conscientious and conservative person in the universe.

If constant hard work, diligence, brutal working schedules and harrying subordinates won’t ward off the possibility of failing, use every other possible means to to keep it away. Falsify numbers, hide anything negative, conceal errors, avoid customer feedback, constantly shift the blame for errors onto anyone too weak to fight back.

Loss of Creativity

Over-achievers destroy their own peace of mind and the lives of those who work for them. People too attached to “goodness” and morality become self-righteous bigots. Those whose values for building close relationships become unbalanced slide into smothering their friends and family with constant expressions of affection and demands for love in return.

Everyone likes to succeed. The problem comes when fear of failure is dominant, when you can no longer accept the inevitability of making mistakes, nor recognize the importance of trial and error in finding the most creative solution.

The more creative you are, the more errors you are going to make. Deciding to avoid the errors will destroy your creativity, too.

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Balance counts more than you think. Some tartness must season the sweetest dish. A little selfishness is valuable even in the most caring person. And a little failure is essential to preserve everyone’s perspective on success.

We hear a lot about being positive. Maybe we also need to recognize that the negative parts of our lives and experience have just as important a role to play in finding success, in work, and in life.

How to Overcome Fear of Failure (Step-by-Step)

1. Figure out Where the Fear Comes From

Ask yourself what the root cause of your negative belief could be.[5] When you look at the four main causes for a fear of failure, which ones resonate with you?

Write down where you think the fear comes from, and try to understand it as an outsider.

If it helps, imagine you’re trying to help one of your best friends. Perhaps your fear stems from something that happened in your childhood, or a deep-seated insecurity.

Naming the source of the fear takes away some of its power.

2. Reframe Beliefs About Your Goal

Having an all or nothing mentality leaves you with nothing sometimes. Have a clear vision for what you’d like to accomplish but include learning something new in your goal.

If you always aim for improvement and learning, you are much less likely to fail.[6]

At Pixar, people are actually encouraged to “fail early and fail fast.”[7] They encourage experimentation and innovation so that they can stay on the cutting edge. That mindset involves failure, but as long as they achieve their vision of telling great stories, all the stumbling blocks are just opportunities to grow.

3. Learn to Think Positive

In many cases, you believe what you tell yourself. Your internal dialogue affects how you react and behave.

Our society is obsessed with success, but it’s important to recognize that even the most successful people encounter failure.

Walt Disney was once fired from a newspaper because they thought he lacked creativity. He went on to found an animation studio that failed. He never gave up, and now Disney is a household name.

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Steve Jobs was also once fired from Apple before returning as the face of the company for many years. [8]

If Disney and Jobs had believed the negative feedback, they wouldn’t have made it.

It’s up to you to notice your negative self talk and identify triggers[9]. Replace negative thoughts with positive facts about yourself and the situation. You’ll be able to create a new mental scripts that you can reach for when you feel negativity creeping in. The voice inside your head has a great effect on what you do.

How To Be A Positive Thinker: Positivity Exercises, Affirmations, & Quotes

    4. Visualize all Potential Outcomes

    Uncertainty about what will happen next is terrifying. Take time to visualize the possible outcomes of your decision. Think about the best and worst-case scenarios. You’ll feel better if you’ve already had a chance to mentally prepare for what could happen.

    Fear of the unknown might keep you from taking a new job. Weigh the pros and cons, and imagine potential successes and failures in making such a life-altering decision. Knowing how things could turn out might help you get unstuck.

    5. Look at the Worst-Case Scenario

    There are times when the worst case could be absolutely devastating. In many cases, if something bad happens, it won’t be the end of the world.

    It’s important to define how bad the worst case scenario is in the grand scheme of your life. Sometimes, we give situations more power than they deserve. In most cases, a failure is not permanent.

    For example, when you start a new business, it’s bound to be a learning experience. You’ll make decisions that don’t pan out, but often that discomfort is temporary. You can change your strategy and rebound. Even in the worst case scenario, if the perceived failure led to the end of that business, it might be the launching point for something new.

    6. Have a Backup Plan

    It never hurts to have a backup plan. The last thing you want to do is scramble for a solution when the worst has happened. The old adage is solid wisdom:

    “Hope for the best, prepare for the worst.”

    Having a backup plan gives you more confidence to move forward and take calculated risks.

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    Perhaps you’ve applied for a grant to fund an initiative at work. In the worst-case scenario, if you don’t get the grant, are there other ways you could get the funds?

    There are usually multiple ways to tackle a problem, so having a backup is a great way to reduce anxiety about possible failure.

    7. Learn From Whatever Happens

    Things may not go the way you planned, but that doesn’t automatically mean you’ve failed. Learn from whatever arises.[10] Even a less than ideal situation can be a great opportunity to make changes and grow.

    “Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn.”

    Dig deep enough, and you’re bound to find the silver lining. When you’ve learned that “failure” is an opportunity for growth instead of a death sentence, you conquer the fear of failure.

    For more tips on how to overcome fear of failure, check out the video below:

    Final Thoughts

    To overcome fear of failure, we can start by figuring out where it comes from and reframing the way we feel about failure. When failure is a chance for growth, and you’ve looked at all possible outcomes, it’s easier to overcome fear.

    Stay positive, have a backup plan, and learn from whatever happens. Your failures will be sources of education and inspiration rather than humiliation.

    “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” -Thomas A. Edison

    Failures can be blessings in disguise. Go boldly in the direction of your dreams and long-term goals.

    More Tips for Conquering Fear

    Featured photo credit: Patrick Hendry via unsplash.com

    Reference

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