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11 Regrets You Can Avoid Before You Retire

11 Regrets You Can Avoid Before You Retire

Ever do something — or not do something — that you regretted later? Ate that one last slice of pizza, or drank a little too much and maybe slept with someone you didn’t know? Of course you have; everyone has. It’s all part of the learning process, right?

However, there are some regrets that can stay with you until you are dying. Many, many people have these regrets. But the good news is, you can start taking care of them today.

1. Caring too much what people think

It’s an absolute given that, no matter how many different ways you stand on your head, you’re going to let people down, make them mad, or break their heart. If you’re going to upset people sooner or later anyway, you might as well upset them while doing something you love.

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2. Staying in a bad relationship

If you are miserable in a relationship, you can’t offer your partner what he or she deserves, which is your best. Let him or her go so he or she can find happiness, and let yourself go so you can find your own.

3. Holding grudges

“Holding” is a verb – an action. It takes effort to hold a grudge. If a grudge were a great big rock, you would be waking up every morning, picking the darn thing up, and carrying it around with you all day. What good is that doing you? Are you trying to punish the person who wronged you by depriving him or her of your company? That’s silly – what if he or she doesn’t even like you? Just put the rock down; it’ll make moving forward much easier.

4. Not taking risks

Yeah, you could fall on your face and make a total ass of yourself. Your business might go belly-up, or your “friends” might laugh at you. But you’ll survive. In the meantime, you’ll learn a hell of a lot… and the next time you take a risk, it won’t be nearly as scary.

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5. Staying in a bad job

In 10 or 20 years, will you be more likely to remember all the bills you kept paid by staying in this job, or will you remember how utterly and completely miserable you were?

6. Spending too much money on “golden shackles”

Buying that fancy car or nice house feels really good at first… until the mortgage payments and repair bills kick in. Those costs stick around a long, long time after the newness and fun has worn off – and can keep you locked into that bad job.

7. Not taking care of your health

By the time you go to the doctor and get that prescription, it’s too late. Take care of your health up front by eating healthy food, exercising regularly, and getting enough rest. It won’t cost you anything except a little effort – and it’ll save you a ton in medical bills, which can also keep you locked in that bad job.

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8. Not finishing what you started

One of the saddest things in the world is a musical instrument that sits on a garage shelf collecting dust while waiting for “someday” to come. Turn “someday” into “now.” In five years, you will have fulfilled a dream. If you don’t, those five years will have passed anyway.

9. Not telling your loved ones you love them

Even the act of taking a few seconds to text or phone someone with “I love you” puts you in a place of appreciating them, and it brightens his or her day, too.

10. Not choosing to be happier

Are you really going to let the things going on in Washington or that rotten person at work keep you from being happy? Well, okay. It’s your choice. But if you’re waiting around for the world to be perfect before you can get happy, you’re going to be waiting a long, long time.

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11. Not sticking up for yourself

You are a child of God, and God doesn’t make garbage. If you think you’re garbage, you’re insulting God, and if someone else thinks you’re garbage, THEY’RE insulting God. You have nothing to be ashamed of.

A final thought:

Whether you’re in your 20’s or your 80’s, it is never too late to start making choices that will free you and make your life bragworthy.

Featured photo credit: Regret / Neil Moralee via flickr.com

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Last Updated on November 19, 2018

How to Find a Suitable Professional Mentor

How to Find a Suitable Professional Mentor

I went through a personal experience that acted as a catalyst for an epiphany. When I got fired from a job, I learned something important about myself and where I was headed with my freelance career. I realized that the most important aspect of that one rather small job was the influence of the company owner. I realized that I wasn’t hurt that the company and I weren’t a perfect match; I was devastated by the stark fact that I needed a mentor and I had almost found one but lost her.

Suddenly, I felt like J.D., the main character in “Scrubs,” chasing Dr. Cox and trying to rip insight and wisdom from someone I respect. The realization that a recognized thought-leader and experienced entrepreneur severed ties with me felt crushing. But, I picked myself back up and thought about five ways to acquire a mentor without having the awkwardness of outright asking.

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1. Remember, a professional mentorship must be mutual.

A professional mentor must agree to engage in a mutual relationship because, as the comedy T.V. series showed us, one simply cannot force someone to tutor us. We have to prove that we are worth the time investment through persistence and dedication to the craft.

2. You have to have common interests with your mentor.

Even if a professional mentor appears at your job or school, realize that unless you and this person have common interests, you won’t find the relationship successful. I’ve been in situations where someone I respected had vastly different ideas about what was important in life or what one should spend his or her free time doing. If these things don’t line up, you may find the relationship won’t be as fruitful, even when the mentor knows a great deal about one industry.

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3. Thought-leaders will respect your passion.

One of the ways you can prove yourself worthy to a professional mentor is through your passion and your dedication. No one wants to spend time grooming and teaching another who will not take advice or put the effort in to improve. When following thought-leaders on Twitter and trying to engage with higher-ups in a work setting, realize that your actions most often speak louder than your words.

4. Before worrying if he respects you, ask if you respect him.

On the other side of the coin, you should seriously reflect on those common interests and make sure you respect your professional mentor. Just because someone holds a title, degree or office does not mean that person is trustworthy or honest. Don’t be swayed by appearances and take the time to find a suitable professional mentor.

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5. Failure is often the best way to learn

I honestly have made more mistakes than I can count. I know I’ve learned a great deal from poorly organized businesses and my own poor choices. The most important quality I’ve developed is an ability to swallow my pride and learn from my mistakes. If life knocks me down nine times, I get back up 10 times. One of the songs Megadeth wrote, “Of Mice and Men,” resonates in my mind when I pull myself up by my bootstraps and try again for a goal I’ve set: “So live your life and live it well. There’s not much left of me to tell. I just got back up each time I fell.” Hopefully, this brief post can act as a professional mentor to you in your quest to find not only a brave leader but also a trusted adviser.

Featured photo credit: morguefile via mrg.bz

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