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11 Regrets You Can Avoid Before You Retire

11 Regrets You Can Avoid Before You Retire

Ever do something — or not do something — that you regretted later? Ate that one last slice of pizza, or drank a little too much and maybe slept with someone you didn’t know? Of course you have; everyone has. It’s all part of the learning process, right?

However, there are some regrets that can stay with you until you are dying. Many, many people have these regrets. But the good news is, you can start taking care of them today.

1. Caring too much what people think

It’s an absolute given that, no matter how many different ways you stand on your head, you’re going to let people down, make them mad, or break their heart. If you’re going to upset people sooner or later anyway, you might as well upset them while doing something you love.

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2. Staying in a bad relationship

If you are miserable in a relationship, you can’t offer your partner what he or she deserves, which is your best. Let him or her go so he or she can find happiness, and let yourself go so you can find your own.

3. Holding grudges

“Holding” is a verb – an action. It takes effort to hold a grudge. If a grudge were a great big rock, you would be waking up every morning, picking the darn thing up, and carrying it around with you all day. What good is that doing you? Are you trying to punish the person who wronged you by depriving him or her of your company? That’s silly – what if he or she doesn’t even like you? Just put the rock down; it’ll make moving forward much easier.

4. Not taking risks

Yeah, you could fall on your face and make a total ass of yourself. Your business might go belly-up, or your “friends” might laugh at you. But you’ll survive. In the meantime, you’ll learn a hell of a lot… and the next time you take a risk, it won’t be nearly as scary.

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5. Staying in a bad job

In 10 or 20 years, will you be more likely to remember all the bills you kept paid by staying in this job, or will you remember how utterly and completely miserable you were?

6. Spending too much money on “golden shackles”

Buying that fancy car or nice house feels really good at first… until the mortgage payments and repair bills kick in. Those costs stick around a long, long time after the newness and fun has worn off – and can keep you locked into that bad job.

7. Not taking care of your health

By the time you go to the doctor and get that prescription, it’s too late. Take care of your health up front by eating healthy food, exercising regularly, and getting enough rest. It won’t cost you anything except a little effort – and it’ll save you a ton in medical bills, which can also keep you locked in that bad job.

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8. Not finishing what you started

One of the saddest things in the world is a musical instrument that sits on a garage shelf collecting dust while waiting for “someday” to come. Turn “someday” into “now.” In five years, you will have fulfilled a dream. If you don’t, those five years will have passed anyway.

9. Not telling your loved ones you love them

Even the act of taking a few seconds to text or phone someone with “I love you” puts you in a place of appreciating them, and it brightens his or her day, too.

10. Not choosing to be happier

Are you really going to let the things going on in Washington or that rotten person at work keep you from being happy? Well, okay. It’s your choice. But if you’re waiting around for the world to be perfect before you can get happy, you’re going to be waiting a long, long time.

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11. Not sticking up for yourself

You are a child of God, and God doesn’t make garbage. If you think you’re garbage, you’re insulting God, and if someone else thinks you’re garbage, THEY’RE insulting God. You have nothing to be ashamed of.

A final thought:

Whether you’re in your 20’s or your 80’s, it is never too late to start making choices that will free you and make your life bragworthy.

Featured photo credit: Regret / Neil Moralee via flickr.com

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Last Updated on March 29, 2021

5 Types of Horrible Bosses and How to Beat Them All

5 Types of Horrible Bosses and How to Beat Them All

When I left university I took a job immediately, I had been lucky as I had spent a year earning almost nothing as an intern so I was offered a role. On my first day I found that I had not been allocated a desk, there was no one to greet me so I was left for some hours ignored. I happened to snipe about this to another employee at the coffee machine two things happened. The first was that the person I had complained to was my new manager’s wife, and the second was, in his own words, ‘that he would come down on me like a ton of bricks if I crossed him…’

What a great start to a job! I had moved to a new city, and had been at work for less than a morning when I had my first run in with the first style of bad manager. I didn’t stay long enough to find out what Mr Agressive would do next. Bad managers are a major issue. Research from Approved Index shows that more than four in ten employees (42%) state that they have previously quit a job because of a bad manager.

The Dream Type Of Manager

My best manager was a total opposite. A man who had been the head of the UK tax system and was working his retirement running a company I was a very junior and green employee for. I made a stupid mistake, one which cost a lot of time and money and I felt I was going to be sacked without doubt.

I was nervous, beating myself up about what I had done, what would happen. At the end of the day I was called to his office, he had made me wait and I had spent that day talking to other employees, trying to understand where I had gone wrong. It had been a simple mistyped line of code which sent a massive print job out totally wrong. I learn how I should have done it and I fretted.

My boss asked me to step into his office, he asked me to sit down. “Do you know what you did?” I babbled, yes, I had been stupid, I had not double-checked or asked for advice when I was doing something I had not really understood. It was totally my fault. He paused. “Will you do that again?” Of course I told him I would not, I would always double check, ask for help and not try to be so clever when I was not!

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“Okay…”

That was it. I paused and asked, should I clear my desk. He smiled. “You have learnt a valuable lesson, I can be sure that you will never make a mistake like that again. Why would I want to get rid of an employee who knows that?”

I stayed with that company for many years, the way I was treated was a real object lesson in good management. Sadly, far too many poor managers exist out there.

The Complete Catalogue of Bad Managers

The Bully

My first boss fitted into the classic bully class. This is so often the ‘old school’ management by power style. I encountered this style again in the retail sector where one manager felt the only way to get the best from staff was to bawl and yell.

However, like so many bullies you will often find that this can be someone who either knows no better or is under stress and they are themselves running scared of the situation they have found themselves in.

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The Invisible Boss

This can either present itself as management from afar (usually the golf course or ‘important meetings) or just a boss who is too busy being important to deal with their staff.

It can feel refreshing as you will often have almost total freedom with your manager taking little or no interest in your activities, however you will soon find that you also lack the support that a good manager will provide. Without direction you may feel you are doing well just to find that you are not delivering against expectations you were not told about and suddenly it is all your fault.

The Micro Manager

The frustration of having a manager who feels the need to be involved in everything you do. The polar opposite to the Invisible Boss you will feel that there is no trust in your work as they will want to meddle in everything you do.

Dealing with the micro-manager can be difficult. Often their management style comes from their own insecurity. You can try confronting them, tell them that you can do your job however in many cases this will not succeed and can in fact make things worse.

The Over Promoted Boss

The Over promoted boss categorises someone who has no idea. They have found themselves in a management position through service, family or some corporate mystery. They are people who are not only highly unqualified to be managers they will generally be unable to do even your job.

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You can find yourself persistently frustrated by the situation you are in, however it can seem impossible to get out without handing over your resignation.

The Credit Stealer

The credit stealer is the boss who will never publically acknowledge the work you do. You will put in the extra hours working on a project and you know that, in the ‘big meeting’ it will be your credit stealing boss who will take all of the credit!

Again it is demoralising, you see all of the credit for your labour being stolen and this can often lead to good employees looking for new careers.

3 Essential Ways to Work (Cope) with Bad Managers

Whatever type of bad boss you have there are certain things that you can do to ensure that you get the recognition and protection you require to not only remain sane but to also build your career.

1. Keep evidence

Whether it is incidents with the bully or examples of projects you have completed with the credit stealer you will always be well served to keep notes and supporting evidence for projects you are working on.

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Buy your own notebook and ensure that you are always making notes, it becomes a habit and a very useful one as you have a constant reminder as well as somewhere to explore ideas.

Importantly, if you do have to go to HR or stand-up for yourself you will have clear records! Also, don’t always trust that corporate servers or emails will always be available or not tampered with. Keep your own content.

2. Hold regular meetings

Ensure that you make time for regular meetings with your boss. This is especially useful for the over-promoted or the invisible boss to allow you to ‘manage upwards’. Take charge where you can to set your objectives and use these meetings to set clear objectives and document the status of your work.

3. Stand your ground, but be ready to jump…

Remember that you don’t have to put up with poor management. If you have issues you should face them with your boss, maybe they do not know that they are coming across in a bad way.

However, be ready to recognise if the situation is not going to change. If that is the case, keep your head down and get working on polishing your CV! If it isn’t working, there will be something better out there for you!

Good luck!

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