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9 Reasons You Never Get What You Want

9 Reasons You Never Get What You Want

Welcome to the leading edge!

First of all, let me congratulate you. By asking the question, “Why do I never get what I want?” you have already started moving toward everything you want. You are challenging the cultural premise that says, “I don’t deserve it,” or “I should be content with the mediocre life that I have,” or “only smart/rich/genius people deserve that stuff.” You should have everything you want! You should feel good! You do deserve good things! And you have acknowledged that what you’ve been doing so far isn’t working, which means that you are open to suggestions about what will work. This puts you ahead of at least 75% of the human population. Welcome to the leading edge!

Nine Reasons That You Don’t Get What You Want

1. You’re satisfied with mediocrity.

We all receive messages from many sources: parents, friends, churches, movies, TV shows, the news… messages that tell us we should be nice, well-behaved consumers who are satisfied with mediocrity and don’t try to stray too far from it. But this doesn’t mean that YOU have to be satisfied with mediocrity. If you have a few minutes, take the time to watch this video by Randy Gage, in which he points out the

“mind viruses” that are fed to you by movies.

2. You say “I can’t.”

These two words, and their cousins “I have to,” should be eliminated from all languages everywhere. These are loser words. Victim words. As soon as you think or say “I can’t,” before you’ve even gotten to “because,”  you’ve already given all of your power away, and the more words you put after “because,” the faster your power is fleeing from you.

Replace “I can’t” with “I could if I wanted to.” Replace “I have to” with “I am doing this because…”

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If those replacements don’t work for you, there are plenty of other words to choose from. According to the Global Language Monitor, as of January 1, 2014, there were 1,025,109.8 words in the English language. Have fun. But don’t say “I can’t” or “I have to,” ever again. Period.

3. You complain about never getting what you want.

Every time we want something, we are also keenly aware of its absence. As Abraham says in this short video, “Every subject is really two subjects.” There is the problem, which is the lack of what you want. For instance, the lack of money —  and there is the solution, which is what you want — more money.

Instead of joining in your friends’ conversations about being poor, lonely, fat or sick, excuse yourself and go daydream for five minutes. What would it be like to be rich? What kind of car would you drive? What kind of house would you live in? What would it be like to be in a great relationship? What would you do together? What would you talk about? If you had a perfect body, what would you wear? How would other people respond to you? What would your perfect job feel like?

4. You hate rich / skinny / successful / healthy / happy / attractive people.

Jealousy is a colossal waste of time and energy. Worse, it keeps you from getting what you want, because if you get rich, a great-looking body, or a relationship that curls your toes… you’re going to look a whole lot like the very people you hate. And then what are you going to do, hate yourself? That’s pretty messed up!

Instead of hating these people, study them! They’ve figured out how to get what you want! If you can figure out how they got it, and you do the same thing, then you can have it, too. They’re giving you a gift foolish not to accept.

“When the success of another makes your heart sing, your resistance is gone, and your own success soars.”
— Abraham Hicks

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5. You only talk about it / haven’t actually done anything about it / think reading about it is enough.

Don’t get me wrong; dreaming, reading, talking (to the right people) is great! All of these actions make you feel super inspired, and this place of inspiration is the best platform from which to launch inspired, productive action.

If you’ve found a perfect diet, a perfect fitness routine, a perfect person, a perfect job, a perfect business opportunity, act! You may never get this opportunity again! Don’t wait until Sunday because it’s a new week. Throw caution to the winds, and take that first step. If you’re hesitating, what’s holding you back? Is it that…

6. You worry about what others think.

If you decide that you’re going to do whatever it takes to fulfill your dreams, sooner or later you’re going to start looking and acting like those rich, skinny, successful people that people hate. And guess what? This means that some people are going to start hating YOU, and some of these people are going to be friends, family and other people you love and care about. Let’s take a minute to truly look at this one, because I have a feeling that it is behind a lot of hesitation for many people.

Your loved ones probably don’t mean you any harm, but some of them may — consciously or unconsciously — try to sabotage you, to keep you down on their level, to make sure they don’t lose connection with you. They might ridicule your moneymaking ideas or your new boyfriend or girlfriend, or bring you doughnuts while you’re on your new diet, or try to talk you into going to the bar instead of going to the gym.

At some point, if you find their antics too distracting, you may have to make a difficult choice. Do you want to give up your dreams, say “I’m sorry,” and stuff yourself back into your old mediocre box to keep them happy? Or do you want to risk alienating them to fulfill your dreams?

You might be tempted to try to bring them up to your level, to talk them into joining you on your journey toward success. I did this for a long time. But unless they want to join you, your attempts to drag them along are going to fail, and in the process, you’ll end up exhausted.

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The good news is, as you become more successful, you will find out who your real friends are, and you’ll attract new friends who support you. These friends will be ecstatic when you tell them that you’ve made your first million dollars, or that you’ve achieved 10% body fat and look fantastic, or that you are completely healed from your disease and have started running again, or that you have found your soul mate and are blissfully in love. These people are keepers.

7. You’re afraid to suck.

This goes back to being worried about what other people think. Remember, everyone was a beginner: Olympic athletes, top-notch musicians, even you. Remember your first day at work? That deer-in-the-headlights feeling? Remember how many mistakes you made? But you didn’t remain a beginner, did you? You got better at what you were doing.

Babies aren’t born with ripped, perfect bodies, fabulous relationships, or checking accounts full of dollars. Self-made millionaires, entrepreneurs, musicians, bodybuilders, married people — everyone had to start from ground zero. And in the beginning, everyone sucked. They started businesses that folded. They tried diets and training programs that didn’t work. They got involved in horrible relationships. Thomas Edison “failed” 10,000 times before he came up with a light bulb that worked. If you try something and it doesn’t work, try something different. But don’t give up your dream.

“Every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit.”
— Napoleon Hill, Think And Grow Rich.

8. You think getting what you want happens overnight.

Do you know what happens to most people who win the lottery or lose lots of weight in a short period of time? They spend all of the money, they put the weight back on, and they wind up back — or worse off than — where they started. Being an overnight success is like being plunged into the deep end of a pool without learning how to swim first. It’s why people like Susan Boyle and Justin Bieber had such a tough time adjusting to becoming overnight sensations; it was too much, too fast. They didn’t get to be beginners.

In most cases, it takes 1 to 2 years for an average person build a ripped body, unless he or she puts in exceptional effort. It takes from 2-5 years for a new business to start turning a profit; more than that to actually generate enough income to live on. Success doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time for our bodies to adjust to a new shape, and it takes time for our minds to adjust to a new way of thinking.

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Once you’ve decided that nothing is more important than your dreams, don’t give up. Stick with it. The payoff will be the manifestation of your dreams, your ability to inspire others to manifest theirs, and, believe it or not, taking the whole human species with you to the next level. You can do it.

9. You decide it’s too hard and quit before you get what you want.

There’s no doubt about it; manifesting your dreams can take a lot of hard work. Whether your dream is starting a business, being in a long-term relationship, having a great-looking, great-feeling body, or changing your outlook on life, sometimes you have to make sacrifices to get there.

When you’re working 60 or more hours a week on your new business and are slowly falling behind on the bills; when you’re exhausted from a late night and the last thing you want to do is get up early and work out; when you and your new partner are fighting again about the same dumb thing you fought about the last time, remember: you aren’t just sacrificing; you’re investing. Just like an investor, you’re setting aside your mental and emotional capital in order to gain wonderful things in the long term. Just hang in there.

Featured photo credit: Freedom/Kathryn via flickr.com

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Last Updated on February 17, 2021

50 Ways to Increase Productivity and Achieve More in Less Time

50 Ways to Increase Productivity and Achieve More in Less Time

If you feel like you don’t have enough time to do everything you want to do, maybe it’s time to check-in with your time management skills.

No one is born to be very good at time management, so that’s okay if you think you’re bad in it. But everyone can learn to boost their productivity and achieve more!

Here are 50 ways to increase productivity and add hours to your day.

1. Set a Timer

Estimate the time you need to tackle different tasks and set a timer for each of your tasks. How you go about this is up to you as there are many different ways. There is the Pomodoro technique where you focus on a task for 25 minutes followed by a five minute break afterwards.

In the event that you have a task that will take much longer than that, you can consider one of the many timer-based apps. One that comes to mind is Clockify. It’s used for freelancers and entrepreneurs alike, however it’s a good way to be setting yourself a timer. It provides reports and you can serve as a project manager of sorts too. Best of all, it’s free.

2. Eliminate All Distractions

Distractions include the phone, email notifications and having multiple web browsers open on the desktop. Just as it’s important to be organized offline, it’s key to have things organized online as well. This free guide End Distractions And Find Your Focus is a good tool to help you. With this guide, you’ll learn how to get rid of distractions and boost productivity. Grab your free guide here.

You can also learn more on how to get rid of all distractions in this guide: How to Focus and Maximize Your Productivity (the Definitive Guide)

3. Listen to Music That Boosts Productivity

Distractions should be avoided, but sometimes a bit of music in the background can help you focus.

Of course, it doesn’t need to be heavy rock music, but a bit of Beethoven may do you some good.

Here’s a complete guide to help you pick the right music for better productivity: How To Maximize Your Productivity With Music: A Complete Guide

4. Find Meaning in What You Do (And Love What You Do)

Enjoying what you do is the ultimate way to increase your productivity.

If you aren’t sure what you love doing yet, don’t worry. Leo Babauta has some unique ways to help you: How to Find Your Passion

5. Prioritize your tasks ahead of time.

By listing your tasks in order of importance, you can make sure that you finish all of your most important tasks during the day.

Learn a unique technique to Prioritize Right in 10 Minutes and Work 10X Faster.

6. Batch Similar Tasks into a Single Batch.

Tasks like blog writing, phone calls, email and errands can be grouped into a single batch. You will save time by completing similar tasks in one session. One way to help you with organizing all of those things is through the app Todoist. It’s an easy and simple way for you to plan out your day, set reminders, and group all of your most important tasks in a convenient spot.

7. Complete Your Most Dreaded Tasks First Thing in the Morning.

Whichever activity you are dreading the most is probably the one you need to complete first thing in the morning.

Many people tend to check emails in the morning because after checking a list of emails, they feel fulfilled. But that’s just an illusion of having achieved more.

Doing simple tasks like checking emails first in the morning is bad for you. Instead, do the difficult tasks because you have more energy in the morning to tackle them!

8. Reward Yourself for Finishing a Big Task

To stay motivated for whatever you do, reward yourself every now and then.

Keep track of your small wins and milestones and celebrate them. So whenever you struggle about your progress, you see how far you’ve come!

Find out more about this 2-Step Approach to Self-Motivation: Track Small Wins and Reward Yourself.

9. Don’t Multitask

Research has shown that multitasking is not productive. If you think you can multitask, think again.

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For optimum productivity, focus on one thing at a time.

10. Step Away from the Computer

The Internet has become one of the number one distraction. To increase your productivity, try to do as much of your work offline as possible.

I do this a lot when I try to brainstom new ideas and have found it to be very beneficial to simply unplug.

11. Use Focus Tools

Make good use of apps and technology to help you remove distractions.

Here’re 18 Best Time Management Apps and Tools to help you stay focused. This way, you’re not distracted by the web, e-mail, or IM.

Also, join the free Fast-Track Class – Overcoming Distraction, and you’ll learn the one simple method to work even when you’re surrounded by distractions. Join the free session now!

12. Just Start

Often times, starting is the hardest part. People tend to wait for the perfect time with perfect condition to start. But there’s no perfect condition.

Once you get going, you will quickly get into a rhythm that could last for hours.

13. Find out Your Productive Hours

Everyone has a certain time of the day in which they are more productive than others. For me, it’s the morning.

Find out when your prime time is for productivity and optimize your work schedule accordingly.

14. Keep a Notebook and Pen on Hand at All Times

This way, you can write down your thoughts, to-dos and ideas at any time. The key is to get everything out of your head and onto paper. Your subconscious mind won’t be reminding you about it every other second. Another consideration is getting the app Evernote. Not only does this save you on ink and paper, Evernote is a convenient place for you to jot down notes and thoughts and then share them with the team. In certain circumstances, this can prove useful if you’re the type of person that has a lot of ideas that you want to share.

15. Write a Blog to Chronicle Your Own Personal Development and Achievements

The blog keeps you accountable and always working towards self improvement and personal growth.

When you write down all the small achievements you’ve been having, you’re also more motivated to move forward.

And you know what, this is how I started Lifehack too! What also helped me in starting Lifehack is WordPress, which allows people to set up a website for free. WordPress has simplified a lot of the process of building a site to the point that virtually anyone can build a website now.

16. Write out a To-Do-List Each Day

I like to plan my day the night before. This way, I can get started on my most important tasks as soon as I wake up. The Full Life Planner is a nice tool to help you organize your days and get things that matter done. Check out the planner here and start to plan your day ahead easily!

Make sure you don’t make any of these common to-do-list mistakes!

17. Write Your Most Important Tasks and To-Dos on a Calendar.

The key to good time management is knowing where to be and what to be doing there at any given time. Effective calendar management goes hand in hand with good task list management.

Learn here How to Use a Calendar to Create Time and Space.

18. Reflect on Your Productivity Constantly

As you go throughout your day, repeatedly ask yourself:

“Am I currently making the best possible use of my time?”

This one simple question can be an excellent boost to your productivity.

19. Get up Early Before Anyone Else

I know it could be difficult for some to wake up early in the morning but nothing beats a quiet house!

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Here’s How to Start Your Day at 5:00 AM and some Simple Things Early Risers Do to make waking up early easier.

20. Get Plenty of Sleep

When you work online, sleep can become a long lost memory. However, it’s important to get plenty of sleep so that your working hours can be as productive as possible.

Try out this night routine which I highly recommend for productivity: The Ultimate Night Routine Guide: Sleep Better and Wake Up Productive

21. Exercise

Research has shown that midday exercise boosts productivity and morale in the workplace.

Take a short walk at lunch or do some simple stretches during your break to maximize your productivity.

Here I have some exercises recommendations for you:

22. Outsource as Much as Possible

If you want to achieve more in less time, learn to delegate or outsource work. Here are just a few of the companies that will help you outsource your everyday tasks:

Also, read this guide to learn how to delegate effectively: How to Delegate Work (the Definitive Guide for Successful Leaders)

23. Set Some Exciting Goals

Without worthy goals, you will never be motivated to get things done.

Set goals that are challenging and achievable. The best goal setting framework is a SMART goal. That said, there are other tools that can help you out as well. For example, The Dreamers’ Guide To Reaching Your Goal is a great guide to help you set and reach goals effectively. Grab your free guide and learn how to make your goals happen this year!

24. Tell Other People About Your Goals

When you tell others about your goals, you will instantly be held accountable.

25. Listen to Podcasts

Listen to educational podcasts or audio books while you’re driving to work, cleaning the house, exercising, or cooking dinner.

Audio learning has the power to add hours to your day. Not to mention, your cranium is sure to thank you for it.

Some recommendations for you: 11 Podcasts To Inspire Yourself

26. Read David Allen’s best-selling book Getting Things Done

This is one of the most important productivity books you will ever read. Read it, apply the tips in your daily lives and get more things done.

Here’re more great books about productivity too: 35 Books on Productivity and Organizational Skills for an Effective Life

27. Learn to Speed Read

When you can read faster, you will read and learn more! Check out these 10 Ways to Increase Your Reading Speed.

You can also make use of the app OutRead to help speed up your reading speed!

28. Learn to Skip When You Read

When you’re reading a book, just read the parts that you need and skip the rest. But you have to read with a purpose.

Learn how to make it work here: How to Read 10X Faster and Retain More

29. Focus on Result-Oriented Activities

Pareto’s law (also known as the 80 20 rule) states that 80% of the outputs result from 20% of the inputs. This means that 20% of our actions result in 80% of the results.

We must find the 20% that is creating the 80% of our desired outcomes and focus solely on those activities.

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30. Take a Break

You can’t always be working at optimum productivity. Instead, you should shoot for working in short bursts at your most productive times.

31. Start a Polyphasic Sleep Schedule

What is polyphasic sleep?

Polyphasic sleep is a sleep pattern specification intended to compress sleep time to 2-5 hours daily.[1] This is achieved by spreading out sleep into short (around 20-45 minute) naps throughout the day. This allows for more waking hours with relatively high alertness.

While you can learn more about it here, you’re recommended to take some naps during the day to recharge your energy too.

32. Learn to Say “No”.

We can’t do everything and therefore we must learn when to say no in order to save our sanity.

Learn the Gentle Art of Saying No from Leo Babauta.

33. Go on an Information Diet

Most of the world lives on information overload. We must eliminate mindless Internet surfing.

Stop reading three different newspapers a day and checking your RSS feeds multiple times a day. Otherwise, you’ll never get anything done.

The key is to limit yourself only to information that you can immediately take action on. Here’re some simple tips you can try: 10 Simple Productivity Tricks To Manage Overloaded Information

34. Organize Your Office

The piles of paper around your desk can be a huge barrier on your productivity. Optimize your time by organizing your office, setting up a system and dumping the junk.

Check out these 21 Tips to Organize Your Office and Get More Done and 20 Easy Home Office Organization Ideas to Boost Your Productivity.

35. Find a Mentor

By modeling after those who have already achieved success, you will save yourself a lot of time and energy.

A good mentor is hard to find, so here’s a guide to help you: What to Look for in a Mentor

36. Learn Keyboard Shortcuts

With technology’s help, you can double your work efficiency. Even better, you learn all the shortcuts when using technology, for example keyboard shortcuts.

When you use keyboard shortcut, you gain 64 hours every year!

Not sure what shortcuts to lear? Check out these 22 Tricks That Can Make Anyone A Keyboard Ninja.

Besides learning the shortcuts, you can also create keyboard shortcuts with AutoHotKey.

37. Improve Your Typing Speed to Save Time

Do you know you can save 21 days per year just by typing fast?

You don’t really need to take some serious courses to type faster, try these typing games online:

38. Work from Home and Avoid the Daily Commute

If your job is a flexible one, consider working from home. This saves you the commute time and you’ll find yourself more energetic throughout the day as you have saved the long ride.

Take a look at these tips to help you stay productive while working from home:

How to Work from Home and Stay Ultra-Productive

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39. Get Rid of Time Wasters

Common time wasters include Instant Messenger, video games, Flickr, checking your stats 10 times a day, television and extraneous Internet surfing.

Don’t rely on your willpower, make use of some of these useful tools to help you stay focus: 10 Online Apps for Better Focus

40. Plan Your Meals in Advance

Plan out all of your meals a week ahead and make your grocery list accordingly. This allows you to focus on the necessary – saving you time and money. You can also save yourself even more time through a wide variety of apps. One app that I find helpful is Mealime. It’s an app that provides you with a wide selection of recipes and also a convenient spot for your grocery list as well.

Considering the fact that over 4 million users have this app, it goes to show that there is a good selection of meal plans that you can follow and that the app is friendly to use.

41. Cook Your Meals in Bulk

When you cook your meals in bulk, you will have plenty of leftovers. This can avoid having to cook everyday.

Find out more about how to make cooking in bulk works: Once a Month Cooking: Productivity Hack or Overrated Time Suck?

42. Protect Yourself from Unnecessary Phone Time with Caller ID

The minutes you spend on picking up unnecessary phone calls are time wasted. You can prevent that from happening.

Check out this detailed guide how you can deal with those unnecessary phone calls: How To Lose the Useless Items that Weigh Down Your Day – Cellphone Calls

43. Take Shorter Showers

This one may sound silly but it’s actually something I struggle with. I spend up to 30 minutes in the shower. Think of the time I could save simply by speeding up a bit.

44. Save the Trips to Bank by Taking Direct Deposit

Many employers now offer direct deposit. If yours does, then be sure and take advantage of it and save yourself from a number of trips to the bank.

45. Auto Pay Your Bills

How many times have you been worried about whether you missed the bills deadline?

Auto paying your bills will save you time and eliminate late fees and increased interest rates.

46. Shop Online

Whenever possible, avoid going to the store. When you shop online, you can be more focus about what you’re getting.

47. Speed up your Internet With a Broadband Connection

Many people are aware of the slow speed of internet but aren’t doing anything about it. In fact, this is the number one Internet time-saver!

If you must use dial-up, then you can use accelerators like Propel and SlipStream to double or even triple your speed.

48. Keep up the Speed of Your Computer

If you’re a Windows user, use Windows hibernation feature to avoid the slowdown of exiting and restarting Windows.

Or maybe, consider switching to Mac as there’re plenty of Advantages You Probably Don’t Know About Switching To Mac From PC.

49. Turn off the TV

The average American watches more than 4 hours of television every day. Over a 65-year life, that’s 9 years glued to the tube.

For better health and productivity, turn off the TV. Here’re 11 more reasons to tell you to stop watching TV so often.

Turn off the TV and you are sure to get more out of life.

50. Use a Tivo or DVR

This can help you cut an hour-long television show down to just 40 minutes. You can save time while not missing the fun.

So, here’s the ultimate list of techniques you should learn to boost productivity. Pick the techniques that work for you and make them your daily habits. As time goes, you’ll find yourself being a lot more productive.

More Time Management Tips

Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

Reference

[1] Medical News Today: What is biphasic and polyphasic sleep?

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