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15 Things Socially Skillful People Don’t Do

15 Things Socially Skillful People Don’t Do

Do you know people who just seem to fit in right away? They know what to say and do to be liked and easily accepted. They have Facebook friends by the thousands! What do they have that seems so elusive to many of us?

Perhaps we’ve been thinking it wrong. Maybe it’s not what they have, but it’s what they don’t have! It seems to me that socially skillful people don’t do certain things – they don’t have ‘off-putting’ mannerisms and habits that push folks away which makes them more attractive to people.

Here are 15 things that socially skillful people don’t do. Let’s learn them so we can avoid doing them in our next party, networking, or even a dating experience!

1. They don’t have bad hygiene.

This seems logical enough as an offending smell would deter instead of encourage closeness. Most of us got the memo in Kindergarten, but just in case some of us were napping that day let’s get crystal – if you want to be liked smell good and look clean.

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2. They don’t dress inappropriately.

It wouldn’t be socially acceptable to go to a black-tie party in board shorts, neither would attending a networking or trade event in a ball-gown. Let’s think about the place where we’re going and what style of attire would best showcase our intentions which should be about charming and not alarming our counterparts.

3. They don’t forget their manners.

Socially apt people say ‘thank you’, ‘please’, and so forth to show that they have good manners. Use of these words are simple acts of kindness that leaves a good impression on most folks.

4. They don’t forget names.

People appreciate it when we take time to remember their names. It shows a kind of interest and awareness that they have been noticed and accounted for and that makes them feel special.

5. They don’t interrupt others.

Letting a person speak uninterrupted is an uncommon thing in many conversations. Most people don’t listen, but instead are silently preparing their next rebuttal while being oblivious or only half-listening to what the other person is saying. Be easily liked by learning to listen well and give timely responses.

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6. They don’t act conceited.

Condescension is not a favorable trait on anyone. This behavior alienates others. It’s best to show your commonality rather than your superiority in cases where you’re trying to get along.

7. They don’t brag.

Socially skillful people know that when meeting new folks it’s not about sharing what they’ve done that ingratiates the person to them, but it’s in the asking of what’s ‘new and cool’ with the other person that really gets them engaged and interested in continuing the conversation.

8. They don’t act ridiculous.

First impressions are important when meeting new people. A potential turn-off is when a person asks inappropriate questions, says dumb things, or acts in a way that is childish or asinine.

9. They don’t use abusive language.

In normal social settings one should refrain from using foul or unbecoming language. Not everyone is comfortable with curse words, dirty jokes, or unpopular remarks so their use should be limited to interactions with close friends.

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10. They don’t do mean things.

Most would agree with the bumper sticker, ‘Mean people suck.’ Although, we sometimes see despicable individuals get ahead in life, in general they are not liked.

11. They don’t get into fights.

Brawlers usually don’t get second invites. (Just sayin.)

12. They don’t take personal offense to minor things.

Small infractions slide off their backs like water off ducks. When people of different cultures, backgrounds, and perspectives come together there is a chance that feathers may be ruffled.  Most people don’t want to offend anyone so with this thought in mind, forgive them easily.

13. They don’t laugh at another person’s expense.

This is an extension of the not being ‘mean’ thing because to make fun of someone in a social setting is pretty egregious unless it’s a sanctioned roasting then by all means fire away. But don’t dish out what you yourself can’t take! (I didn’t make up the rules.)

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14. They don’t purposely ignore people.

In a perfect world cliquey types would be booted off the island faster than the Survivor dude can say, ‘I’ve got nothing for you, head back to camp.’  It’s just not nice to exclude individuals in social events. It’s counterproductive! Hello? We’re trying to get to know people and be liked!

15. They don’t overstay their welcome.

When hanging out with new people or person there is an undisclosed time-frame of tolerance – basically, how long a person can stand the sight of you and not want to chuck a cellphone in your direction. Everyone’s clock is slightly different, but socially quick people have their finger on the buzzer and it seems to go off at around 27 hours give or take. (Borrowed from a pseudo statistic from an article on the Do’s and Don’ts of One Night Stands – seemed interchangeable)

Social acceptance is a goal for most individuals and traversing through the many scenarios of where you can meet people can be more appealing and your efforts more successful when these simple guidelines of things we shouldn’t do are followed. (All those in agreement say aye!)

Featured photo credit: Phillip Stearns via flickr.com

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Last Updated on May 24, 2019

How to Be Productive at Home and Make Every Day a Productive Day

How to Be Productive at Home and Make Every Day a Productive Day

If you’ve ever wondered how to be productive at home or how you could possibly have a more productive day, look no further.

Below you’ll find six easy tips that will help you make the most out of your time:

1. Create a Good Morning Routine

One of the best ways to start your day is to get up early and eat a healthy breakfast.

CEOs and other successful people have similar morning routines, which include exercising and quickly scanning their inboxes to find the most urgent tasks.[1]

You can also try writing first thing in the morning to warm up your brain[2] (750 words will help with that). But no matter what you choose to do, remember to create good morning habits so that you can have a more productive day.

If you aren’t sure how to make morning routine work for you, this guide will help you:

The Ultimate Morning Routine to Make You Happy And Productive All Day

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2. Prioritize

Sometimes we can’t have a productive day because we just don’t know where to start. When that’s the case, the most simple solution is to list everything you need to get accomplished, then prioritize these tasks based on importance and urgency.

Week Plan is a simple web app that will help you prioritize your week using the Covey time management grid. Here’s an example of it:[3]

    If you get the most pressing and important items done first, you will be able to be more productive while keeping stress levels down.

    Lifehack’s CEO, Leon, also has great advice on how to prioritize. Take a look at this article to learn more about it:

    How to Prioritize Right in 10 Minutes and Work 10X Faster

    3. Focus on One Thing at a Time

    One of the biggest killers of productivity is distractions. Whether it be noise or thoughts or games, distractions are a barrier to any productive day. That’s why it’s important to know where and when you work best.

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    Need a little background noise to keep you on track? Try working in a coffee shop.

    Can’t stand to hear even the ticking of a clock while writing? Go to a library and put in your headphones.

    Don’t be afraid to utilize technology to make the best of your time. Sites like [email protected] and Simply Noise can help keep you focused and productive all day long.

    And here’s some great apps to help you focus: 10 Online Apps for Better Focus

    4. Take Breaks

    Focusing, however, can drain a lot of energy and too much of it at once can quickly turn your productive day unproductive.

    To reduce mental fatigue while staying on task, try using the Pomodoro Technique. It requires working on a task for 25 minutes, then taking a short break before another 25 minute session.

    After four “pomodoro sessions,” be sure to take a longer break to rest and reflect.

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    I like to work in 25 and 5 minute increments, but you should find out what works best for you.

    5. Manage Your Time Effectively

    A learning strategies consultant once told me that there is no such thing as free time, only unstructured time.

    How do you know when exactly you have free time?

    By using the RescueTime app, you can see when you have free time, when you are productive, and when you actually waste time.

    With this data, you can better plan out your day and keep yourself on track.

    Moreover, you can increase the quality of low-intensity time. For example, reading the news while exercising or listening to meeting notes while cooking. Many of the mundane tasks we routinely accomplish can be paired with other tasks that lead to an overall more productive day.

    A bonus tip, even your real free time can be used productively, find out how:

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    20 Productive Ways to Use Your Free Time

    6. Celebrate and Reflect

    No matter how you execute a productive day, make sure to take time and celebrate what you’ve accomplished. It’s important to reward yourself so that you can continue doing great work. Plus, a reward system is an incredible motivator.

    Additionally, you should reflect on your day in order to find out what worked and what didn’t. Reflection not only increases future productivity, but also gives your brain time to decompress and de-stress.

    Try these 10 questions for daily self reflection.

    More Articles About Daily Productivity

    Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

    Reference

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