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15 Lies Your Subconscious Brain is Secretly Telling You to Prevent Your Wildest Dreams

15 Lies Your Subconscious Brain is Secretly Telling You to Prevent Your Wildest Dreams

The subconscious mind works very much like a computer. It has programs that take raw data (life) and turn it into something you can understand (perception). Sometimes the programs conflict with each other and create glitches. These glitches waste time and energy, which prevents you from achieving your wildest dreams. Here are 15 common subconscious glitches that people today have and how to upgrade them.

1. You are special. Everyone is special in his or her own way

If you have grown up with Barney and Sesame Street, you probably have heard this one over and over and over, in song form. You are probably singing it in your head right now. This is a a HUGE upgrade from “you are not special; you are no good,” of the ’50s and ’60s. The program still creates an illusion that we must be validated by the outside world to be valuable. It has created a generation of awkward people-pleasing, not successful happy people as it had been intended.

Upgrade your subconscious program: I am worthy of love and prosperity.

The intent of the original statement was to instill value of others and ourselves. This new statement creates value in an elegant way: once we truly believe we are worthy of love and prosperity, we can love others abundantly.

2. If I had chosen a different major in college, I would be making $50,000 more by now

This one often comes to us quite explicitly. It is so ingrained in our culture that a particular field holds all the money. This lie stops many people from really achieving their dreams through pure exhaustion. How many different job types can you find that make more money than you? Probably close to infinity. Making infinite calculations saps brain power. Brain power you could be using to create your dreams already.

Upgrade your subconscious program: I am exactly where I am supposed to be.

Sit in the absolute truth of where you are; it is freeing. Want to feel even more free? Love yourself for where you are, and let go of all those calculations.

3. I can’t be awesome now. I have a responsibility to my kids

Can you see what this lie is saying? Responsibility and awesomeness are mutually exclusive here. You might not have noticed the oxymoron, but your computer-like subconscious definitely did. “Functioning members of society” have placed a higher priority to responsibility than awesomeness, and viola! Deciding to be awesome has gone by the wayside. The most successful entrepreneurs have learned how to integrate these two sentences. Fun and responsible.

Upgrade your subconscious program:  When I am happy, my children are happy and healthy.

Kids pick up on drudgery. If you put the oxygen mask on yourself first, you affect the people around you, especially children and animals.

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4. I am going to change the world (by myself)

On the surface, this program appears noble. It prevents us from our dreams by putting ourselves on an unattainable pedestal. “By myself” is a subconscious, sabotaging belief. Abraham Lincoln, Thomas Edison and Steve Jobs are considered great. All of them had help. If you find yourself in this thought pattern, don’t fret. You are asking a basic human question: “did I matter?”

Upgrade your subconscious program: I am important.  I am powerful.

You don’t need peer-reviewed proof that you are important and powerful. Believing first it will take the instability out of your mind so you have the brainpower to actually change the world.

5. I owe it to my family to be successful

This might sound like a repeat of number 3. The difference here is OWE. You have successfully placed yourself in an unpayable debt.  This mindset begins when someone has done you a great kindness. Thank you doesn’t seem like enough. It is a dangerous mindset.  You can never repay it. If you are feeling the money gnaw in your guts, your subconscious is telling you a version of this lie.

Upgrade your subconscious program: I am thankful for wonderful people in my life.  I am sorry for any pain I have caused.

Stop trying to make up for the past. “Thank you” and “I’m sorry” are enough, when said wholeheartedly.

6. Look how far I have come despite my upbringing

Let’s look at the dynamics of this sentence: “I am great; my upbringing was horrible. This makes me even greater.” The subconscious reads this: “I can change the past with the future.” This means the present is the worst place to be, and causes a lot of zoning out. All this time zoning out can be spent actually getting work done.

Upgrade your subconscious program:  It’s good to be me.

Recognizing that your experiences are good creates a life you already love. When you love your life, you have the opportunity to move forward.

7. I sacrificed so much to visit Aunt Edna! I don’t even like her!

Resentment is a smoldering poison you have eaten, and you are hoping Aunt Edna will die from it. News flash: poison kills the person who eats it. If you have resentment in one area of your life, it is most likely disrupting your productivity elsewhere. If you have decided to visit a family member, own it. Only then will you be able to enjoy it.

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Upgrade your subconscious program: I feel that Aunt Edna is a spiteful old biddy, and she has hilarious stories.

Here, you are not sugar-coating your feelings to ignore them. You are honest about your reactions to her personality AND you are coming up with something you like about the visit. Laughter is healing, so you are benefiting from the visit as well.

8. Last time I went to the library for playtime, I said something really stupid. It was so awkward! I can’t go back there.

Guilt is a poison we eat and hope the other person feels better. Shrinking ourselves so the other appears greater is a subconscious survival tactic. And very often, the aim is achieved. The other person actually feels better. Do you feel better? No, and cutting off something amazing for you diminishes your dreams.

Upgrade your subconscious program: I am thankful for the library, I am thankful for the mom; I am thankful for myself.

Thankfulness neutralizes guilt. Being thankful for every piece of the awkward situation creates a safe space for you to repair the relationship.

9. My subconscious is sabotaging me. I wish it didn’t. I want to change it.

Have you ever heard the saying “what you resist persists”? The key here is where your focus is placed. In this sentence, hatred is placed on sabotage. Focus is placed on sabotage. If you really want to achieve your wildest dreams, you must tell your subconscious what you do want by placing your focus on dreams.

Upgrade your subconscious program: I am thankful for my subconscious mind.  I choose to upgrade it so it aligns with my goals.

Thanking this part of you validates that every part of you is doing the best you can with what you have. And you are choosing to make better choices every day.

10. I have so much pain in my life, I could never be great.

This blatant lie is a good reason to stay on the couch all day. If your wildest dreams include Kardashians marathons 24/7, then look no further. But if your dreams include real influence, upgrade this one ASAP. Some of the biggest influences in our history had miserable difficulties in their past. We like them because of their tragedies. The story of their lives connects us to them.

Upgrade your subconscious program: I love and accept myself.

This one may take some time to sink in. It’s a transformative healing process. One day you will be able to look back on those painful memories without still feeling the pain.

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11. My mom doesn’t like me. Nobody likes me.

We are in the midst of the biggest subconscious victim mentality to date. If you can “prove” that you were the slightest bit a victim in any situation, you receive sympathy. And believing that your mother hated you is the mother of all “victimhood”. What does this do for your dreams? It blocks every creative thought you might have given life to. Notice your friends who are vocal about how horrible their mothers are. Are they creative? Do they finish projects? You don’t have to believe this detrimental lie.

Upgrade your subconscious program: My mom loves me as much as she can.  I love myself.

We are all doing the best we can with what we have. Put yourself in her shoes. Motherhood is a tough job. It is a literal jump into the unknown. And it seems everyone is a critic. Remember that hurt people hurt people. She didn’t mean to; she just didn’t know how else to handle the situation.

12. If I am successful, everyone will hate me.

This is also the “know your roots” lie. Your current friends may feel resistant to your success because of their own insecurities. When friends and family use this phrase as an insult, they are speaking from a place of pain, not truth. This sentence is a lie because your friends and family may not feel this way at all. They might even want to cheer you on; upgrade this program and you will be able to see the encouragement that is already there.

Upgrade your subconscious program: I am successful; my friends are successful.

If you truly believe your friends are successful at what they do best, you will not feel like you are leaving them in the dust. You will feel more on a journey together. Look for 3 things each of your friends is good at and remind yourself of them.

13. I’m not analytic enough to be one of the best.

All of us have talents in some kind of analysis. Analysis is breaking something into its repeatable parts with the intention to create something amazing. It’s also about defining those parts so you can make sense of them. Artists analyze the constituent shapes of an object to create a lifelike painting. Speakers analyze psychology of learning so they can give the best presentation. And all this happens in the blink of an eye. Ignoring your analytic skills discounts your ability to make sense of the world. A world that doesn’t make sense creates an excellent breeding ground for victim hood.

Upgrade your subconscious program: I invite my subconscious analysis into my conscious mind.

Once you begin to invite your analysis, you will be come extremely aware of where your gifts are. You will see how talented you really are. The world will begin to make sense.

14. I am so fat. I hate my body. I want to punish it into submission.

Yes. Your body image is holding you back from achieving your wildest dreams. For many, learning how to listen to the body is a training ground for the bigger goals you have. Listening will help you become healthy. Becoming healthy will give you the energy to start, work on, and finish your dream projects.

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Upgrade your subconscious program: I love my body and what it can do for me.

Focus on the amazing things your body has done for you, like carry a baby to term or even walk up a flight of stairs. Recognizing these simple abilities will start a conversation with your body and teach you how to listen to it.

15. I can’t do this

This lie is the most tricky! In childbirth, the moment a woman says this phrase and believes it, all signs point that she is almost done. This is true in any creative project. The moment you really feel like you cannot do this, you are almost there. That is not the time to give up!

Upgrade your subconscious program: I am doing it. And I love me.

Take a quick moment to notice all the progress you have made. Take three deep belly breaths and remember that you are doing it.

Now here is the challenge:

Trying to upgrade all of the programs at the same time could put you into a tailspin. Choose one program to upgrade today! Write a comment below telling us which one you chose and how that one will bring you into better alignment with your dreams.

Featured photo credit: Ryan McGuire of Bells Design via gratisography.com

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

8 Ways to Train Your Brain to Learn Faster and Remember More

8 Ways to Train Your Brain to Learn Faster and Remember More

You go to the gym to train your muscles. You run outside or go for hikes to train your endurance. Or, maybe you do neither of those, but still wish you exercised more.

Well, here is how to train one of the most important parts of your body: your brain.

When you train your brain, you will:

  • Avoid embarrassing situations. You remember his face, but what was his name?
  • Be a faster learner in all sorts of different skills. No problem for you to pick up a new language or new management skill.
  • Avoid diseases that hit as you get older. Alzheimer’s will not be affecting you.

So how to train your brain and improve your cognitive skills?

1. Work your memory

Twyla Tharp, a NYC-based renowned choreographer has come up with the following memory workout:

When she watches one of her performances, she tries to remember the first twelve to fourteen corrections she wants to discuss with her cast without writing them down.

If you think this is anything less than a feat, then think again. In her book The Creative Habit she says that most people cannot remember more than three.

The practice of both remembering events or things and then discussing them with others has actually been supported by brain fitness studies.

Memory activities that engage all levels of brain operation—receiving, remembering and thinking—help to improve the function of the brain.

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Now, you may not have dancers to correct, but you may be required to give feedback on a presentation, or your friends may ask you what interesting things you saw at the museum. These are great opportunities to practically train your brain by flexing your memory muscles.

What is the simplest way to help yourself remember what you see? Repetition.

For example, say you just met someone new:

“Hi, my name is George”

Don’t just respond with, “Nice to meet you”. Instead, say, “Nice to meet you George.”

Got it? Good.

2. Do something different repeatedly

By actually doing something new over and over again, your brain wires new pathways that help you do this new thing better and faster.

Think back to when you were three years old. You surely were strong enough to hold a knife and a fork just fine. Yet, when you were eating all by yourself, you were creating a mess.

It was not a matter of strength, you see. It was a matter of cultivating more and better neural pathways that would help you eat by yourself just like an adult does.

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And guess what? With enough repetition you made that happen!

But how does this apply to your life right now?

Say you are a procrastinator. The more you don’t procrastinate, the more you teach your brain not to wait for the last minute to make things happen.

Now, you might be thinking “Duh, if only not procrastinating could be that easy!”

Well, it can be. By doing something really small, that you wouldn’t normally do, but is in the direction of getting that task done, you will start creating those new precious neural pathways.

So if you have been postponing organizing your desk, just take one paper and put in its right place. Or, you can go even smaller. Look at one piece of paper and decide where to put it: Trash? Right cabinet? Another room? Give it to someone?

You don’t actually need to clean up that paper; you only need to decide what you need to do with it.

That’s how small you can start. And yet, those neural pathways are still being built. Gradually, you will transform yourself from a procrastinator to an in-the-moment action taker.

3. Learn something new

It might sound obvious, but the more you use your brain, the better its going to perform for you.

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For example, learning a new instrument improves your skill of translating something you see (sheet music) to something you actually do (playing the instrument).

Learning a new language exposes your brain to a different way of thinking, a different way of expressing yourself.

You can even literally take it a step further, and learn how to dance. Studies indicate that learning to dance helps seniors avoid Alzheimer’s. Not bad, huh?

4. Follow a brain training program

The Internet world can help you improve your brain function while lazily sitting on your couch. A clinically proven program like BrainHQ can help you improve your memory, or think faster, by just following their brain training exercises.

5. Work your body

You knew this one was coming didn’t you? Yes indeed, exercise does not just work your body; it also improves the fitness of your brain.

Even briefly exercising for 20 minutes facilitates information processing and memory functions. But it’s not just that–exercise actually helps your brain create those new neural connections faster. You will learn faster, your alertness level will increase, and you get all that by moving your body.

Now, if you are not already a regular exerciser, and already feel guilty that you are not helping your brain by exercising more, try a brain training exercise program like Exercise Bliss.

Remember, just like we discussed in #2, by training your brain to do something new repeatedly, you are actually changing yourself permanently.

6. Spend time with your loved ones

If you want optimal cognitive abilities, then you’ve got to have meaningful relationships in your life.  Talking with others and engaging with your loved ones helps you think more clearly, and it can also lift your mood.

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If you are an extrovert, this holds even more weight for you. At a class at Stanford University, I learned that extroverts actually use talking to other people as a way to understand and process their own thoughts.

I remember that the teacher told us that after a personality test said she was an extrovert, she was surprised. She had always thought of herself as an introvert. But then, she realized how much talking to others helped her frame her own thoughts, so she accepted her new-found status as an extrovert.

7. Avoid crossword puzzles

Many of us, when we think of brain fitness, think of crossword puzzles. And it’s true–crossword puzzles do improve our fluency, yet studies show they are not enough by themselves.

Are they fun? Yes. Do they sharpen your brain? Not really.

Of course, if you are doing this for fun, then by all means go ahead. If you are doing it for brain fitness, then you might want to choose another activity

8. Eat right – and make sure dark chocolate is included

Foods like fish, fruits, and vegetables help your brain perform optimally. Yet, you might not know that dark chocolate gives your brain a good boost as well.

When you eat chocolate, your brain produces dopamine. And dopamine helps you learn faster and remember better. Not to mention, chocolate contains flavonols, antioxidants, which also improve your brain functions.

So next time you have something difficult to do, make sure you grab a bite or two of dark chocolate!

The bottom line

Now that you know how to train your brain, it’s actually time to start doing.

Don’t just consume this content and then go on with your life as if nothing has changed. Put this knowledge into action and become smarter than ever!

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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