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14 Things Mentally Strong People Do Differently To Be More Successful

14 Things Mentally Strong People Do Differently To Be More Successful

We’ve all had our moments in life when we feel like we just can’t take it anymore. Life gets us down. We feel beaten, broken, and like there’s no way out. But what is the difference between the people who can turn it around and make lemonade out of lemons? It all lies in how you think. If you are mentally strong, you can be happy in many different situations. If you want to be one of those people, here are 14 things that they do in order to be successful:

1. They control their emotions.

Mentally strong people don’t let their emotions control them. That’s not to say that they don’t have emotions. They do. They just don’t let them overwhelm them in any given situation. They have the ability to step outside themselves and put their logical side in the driver’s seat, while keeping the emotional part of themselves on the passenger’s side.

2. They re-frame the situation.

Instead of looking at obstacles as problems, mentally strong people see them as learning opportunities. They don’t see tragedy, they see triumph. They realize things could always be worse. They know that other people are worse off than them. So they immediately (or eventually) re-frame the situation in more positive terms.

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3. They stay calm.

If they are facing a crisis, they don’t freak out for very long. For example, if they find out that they are going to be laid off from their job, they don’t sink into a deep depression or start crying and screaming about it. They simply breathe, center themselves, and decide that everything will turn out fine. Then they take action immediately to solve the problem (like starting to apply to new jobs).

4. They accept things they can’t change.

You have to pay taxes. You can’t change that. You have to pay your mortgage if you want to keep your house. You can’t change that. You have to get along with your spouse or co-workers. And you can’t change them. So all you can do is accept the things you can’t change. That’s what mentally strong people do. They know the difference between what they can and can’t change. And they simply accept it because to do otherwise would only be putting more negative energy into the situation.

5. They appreciate what they have.

I know a lot of people who have absolutely wonderful lives but the do nothing but complain about what they don’t have. Mentally strong people don’t do that. They know they are lucky. They look at what they do have and give regular thanks and appreciation for it all. The emotion of appreciation has one of the highest vibrations, and it brings more goodness into your life.

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6. They don’t dwell on the negatives.

Instead of seeing the glass as half empty or even half full, mentally strong people see the glass as always full – half liquid and half air. They focus on solutions. For example, if they have marriage problems, they focus on what they love about their spouse, not what they don’t. Then they work with the other person to find solutions.

7. They take personal responsibility for their thoughts and actions.

If something goes wrong in their life, they don’t point the finger at other people. Mentally strong people know that they are the only ones who are in charge of their successes or failures. They never see themselves as a victim.

8. They love themselves.

A lot of people think that self-love is the same as being conceited or having a big ego. That is far from the truth. People who truly love themselves don’t go around telling others how great they are because they don’t have to. People already know they are awesome because they see their greatness. And mentally strong people love themselves and believe they are capable of doing anything.

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9. They learn from the past.

Many people like to put their heads in the sand and ignore the past – especially when it is painful looking back. But mentally strong people know that their past has made them into who they are today. They look at what did and didn’t work in the past, and they do it better in the future. As Maya Angelou says, “When you know better, you do better.” Mentally strong people don’t see the past in terms of ‘mistakes’ or ‘failures,’ they see these things as ‘lessons learned.’

10. They change what they can.

As I said in point 4, some things you can’t change. But most of the things in life are changeable. So if a mentally strong person doesn’t like their job, they look for a new one. If their relationships aren’t up to par, they talk to the person so they can work on it. They don’t settle for being stagnant. They keep moving forward by implementing positive change.

11. They are self-reflective.

Mentally strong people continually examine themselves to understand why they are the way they are. It’s a skill that can be developed by almost anyone, but mentally strong people have mastered it. They know who they are and how their behavior is affecting their life and their relationships. You can’t change what you don’t recognize, and they know that.

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12. They have self-discipline.

Sure, we all have things we dislike doing. But while many people go into avoidance or procrastination mode, mentally strong people train their minds to do what they need to do. They don’t shy away from taking actions that might not be pleasurable if they need to be done. They welcome the challenge and hold themselves accountable.

13. They don’t get jealous of other people.

The ‘Green-Eyed Monster’ can be a terrible thing. Many people are constantly comparing themselves to others and thinking they are inferior. People who are mentally strong don’t do that. They appreciate what they have and realize that everyone is different. Everyone has their own path. They celebrate everyone’s success – including their own.

14. They keep going.

Mentally strong people never give up. They never see themselves as a failure. If things aren’t going according to plan, they just make a new plan. They don’t get stuck. They are always moving forward toward making a better future.

If you think you’re not mentally strong, don’t worry. You can get there. All it takes is the desire to actually do it. And practice. But it can be done. So make a decision right now that you not only can – but will – become mentally strong.

To your success!!!

More by this author

Carol Morgan

Dr. Carol Morgan is the owner of HerSideHisSide.com, a communication professor, dating & relationship coach, TV personality, speaker, and author.

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Last Updated on March 23, 2021

Manage Your Energy so You Can Manage Your Time

Manage Your Energy so You Can Manage Your Time

One of the greatest ironies of this age is that while various gadgets like smartphones and netbooks allow you to multitask, it seems that you never manage to get things done. You are caught in the busyness trap. There’s just too much work to do in one day that sometimes you end up exhausted with half-finished tasks.

The problem lies in how to keep our energy level high to ensure that you finish at least one of your most important tasks for the day. There’s just not enough hours in a day and it’s not possible to be productive the whole time.

You need more than time management. You need energy management

1. Dispel the idea that you need to be a “morning person” to be productive

How many times have you heard (or read) this advice – wake up early so that you can do all the tasks at hand. There’s nothing wrong with that advice. It’s actually reeks of good common sense – start early, finish early. The thing is that technique alone won’t work with everyone. Especially not with people who are not morning larks.

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I should know because I was once deluded with the idea that I will be more productive if I get out of bed by 6 a.m. Like most of you Lifehackers, I’m always on the lookout for productivity hacks because I have a lot of things in my plate. I’m working full time as an editor for a news agency, while at the same time tending to my side business as a content marketing strategist. I’m also a travel blogger and oh yeah, I forgot, I also have a life.

I read a lot of productivity books and blogs looking for ways to make the most of my 24 hours. Most stories on productivity stress waking up early. So I did – and I was a major failure in that department – both in waking up early and finishing early.

2. Determine your “peak hours”

Energy management begins with looking for your most productive hours in a day. Getting attuned to your body clock won’t happen instantly but there’s a way around it.

Monitor your working habits for one week and list down the time when you managed to do the most work. Take note also of what you feel during those hours – do you feel energized or lethargic? Monitor this and you will find a pattern later on.

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My experiment with being a morning lark proved that ignoring my body clock and just doing it by disciplining myself to wake up before 8 a.m. will push me to be more productive. I thought that by writing blog posts and other reports in the morning that I would be finished by noon and use my lunch break for a quick gym session. That never happened. I was sleepy, distracted and couldn’t write jack before 10 a.m.

In fact that was one experiment that I shouldn’t have tried because I should know better. After all, I’ve been writing for a living for the last 15 years, and I have observed time and again that I write more –and better – in the afternoon and in evenings after supper. I’m a night owl. I might as well, accept it and work around it.

Just recently, I was so fired up by a certain idea that – even if I’m back home tired from work – I took out my netbook, wrote and published a 600-word blog post by 11 p.m. This is a bit extreme and one of my rare outbursts of energy, but it works for me.

3. Block those high-energy hours

Once you have a sense of that high-energy time, you can then mold your schedule so that your other less important tasks will be scheduled either before or after this designated productive time.

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Block them out in your calendar and use the high-energy hours for your high priority tasks – especially those that require more of your mental energy and focus. You also need to use these hours to any task that will bring you closer to you life’s goal.

If you are a morning person, you might want to schedule most business meetings before lunch time as it’s important to keep your mind sharp and focused. But nothing is set in stone. Sometimes you have to sacrifice those productive hours to attend to other personal stuff – like if you or your family members are sick or if you have to attend your son’s graduation.

That said, just remember to keep those productive times on your calendar. You may allow for some exemptions but stick to that schedule as much as possible.

There’s no right or wrong way of using this energy management technique because everything depends on your own personal circumstances. What you need to remember is that you have to accept what works for you – and not what other productivity gurus say you should do.

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Understanding your own body clock is the key to time management. Without it, you end up exhausted chasing a never-ending cycle of tasks and frustrations.

Featured photo credit: Collin Hardy via unsplash.com

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