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Last Updated on October 20, 2020

10 Strategies to Keep Moving Forward When Feeling Stuck

10 Strategies to Keep Moving Forward When Feeling Stuck

We have all felt stuck at some point in our lives. Perhaps you feel stuck right now. When that happens, it can feel impossible to keep moving forward toward your goals and dreams. 

Maybe you’re feeling a little stuck working on a creative project, like writing an article or painting a piece of art. Perhaps you started a new business, took on a major project at work, or began a new health or fitness regimen. Your initial excitement has worn off, and you’re now feeling stuck, confused, or overwhelmed by how to keep progressing forward.

Maybe you’re really stuck. You feel trapped in a job you hate, a relationship that isn’t working, a boatload of debt, or a life that has little resemblance to the one you imagined.

Sometimes we just want to throw in the towel and give up, but don’t give up just yet.

Whether you feel just a little stuck or like you’re stuck in dry concrete, trying to make a small or big decision or wondering what you’re doing with your life, these 10 strategies can help you keep moving forward.

1. Take a Step Back

Your first step forward when you feel stuck is to take a step back. Often, we try to get unstuck by pushing forward with sheer force or just trying harder. But as Einstein said,

“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.”

Access a different level of thinking by assessing your current situation from a new viewpoint. Whenever I’m working with clients who feel stuck, this is the first thing I ask them to do.

I have them think about where they are, what got them here, and what they really want. When you step back from your life, career, and challenges and look from a bit of a distance, you see things from a different perspective.

Your Turn:

Imagine you are lost in the woods. You could keep moving forward, looking for your way out. You could panic and go in circles. You could head back the way you came. 

Imagine instead that you could stop, take a deep breath, and zoom out from your situation. Imagine you could fly above it all as if you were in a helicopter and look down at yourself among the trees.

What could you see or notice differently from this perspective – a different route, people there to support you, the way out is closer than you thought?

Another way to zoom out is to look at your situation as a neutral observer. Imagine you’re a fly on the wall watching your life. What insights or advice would you give yourself?[1]

2. Get Specific

It’s hard to move forward until you fully understand why you are stuck. You have to get specific and identify what’s really going on. You must name it to tame it.

A great mentor of mine once said,

“A well-defined problem presents its own solution.”

For example, there are big differences between, “I feel stuck” and “I feel stuck because I’m overwhelmed with the details” or “I feel stuck because I’m worried what people are going to think of me.” Once you name it, you are more likely to be able to tame it and keep moving forward.

One of the most important questions I ask clients is, “What’s getting in the way?” When they answer, the next question is always, “What else?” We continue along this route until we feel we’ve gotten to the real, underlying issue(s).

Your Turn:

Seek to uncover the underlying issues that are getting in your way and stopping you from progressing. You can do this by journaling, talking to someone who knows you well, or simply taking the time to ask yourself these questions.

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Once you name it, perhaps the solution will then present and tame itself.

3. Reconnect to Your Why

Feeling stuck is often because you’ve lost sight of the bigger picture and what’s important. You’ve lost your why.

Why did you start this in the first place? What reasons, values, or passions drove you to make this change in your life? What picture do you have for yourself, your business, and your life? 

By reminding yourself of your original intention and purpose, it gives you the intrinsic motivation to get back on track and move ahead.

Connecting to your deeper ‘why’ will be the fuel that keeps you going, even through tough times and roadblocks.

Your Turn:

Whatever you’re stuck on right now, grab a journal and ask yourself: Why is this important to me? Why did I start this in the first place? What am I trying to achieve here, and why is that important to me?

4. Brainstorm Your Options

We often feel stuck because we don’t see any way out from our current situation — we feel we don’t have what it takes to start opening up new doors and further our personal development.

By brainstorming ideas and possibilities, you expand your mind and open your thinking to finding a new solution. When you can see potential options, you won’t feel so trapped anymore. 

This is not about deciding the one thing or making the right choice, it’s about allowing your creative mind to expand and see all the potential possibilities. We often dive straight into finding the right one and eliminate anything that doesn’t feel perfect.

That’s why so many people feel stuck. They are attempting to find the next right career, the best way to handle a situation, or the one perfect idea. This can lead to a lot of stress and analysis paralysis.

If you hate your career, what new potential careers are on your mind? List them all out — even the ones that seem unrealistic or silly.

If you’re unhappy in your relationship, what can you do? There are likely a lot more options than you’ve considered. What are they?

Your Turn:

Make a list of options for your current situation – as crazy or “out there” as they might be.

When you think you’ve thought of everything, ask yourself, “What other options are there?” This allows you to dig deeper and see ideas you might not have otherwise explored.

Then, and only then, can you start to identify the way forward.

5. Take a Brain Break

Full disclosure, I’m stealing this strategy from my 7-year-old daughter’s second-grade teacher.

The other night I was helping my daughter with homework. She was getting super frustrated and wasn’t sure what to write in a letter to her big buddy. She was on the verge of tears when she looked up and asked, “Mom, can I take a brain break?”

She got up from the table, walked downstairs to her room, and played with her stuffed animals. When she came upstairs a short time later, she was as happy as could be and jumped right into her writing.

We could all use a brain break when we’re stuck. Shifting focus gives our brains a chance for quiet; it takes the pressure off so we can come back with a fresh mind and new perspective.

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When we take a brain break, it refreshes our thinking and helps us discover another solution to a problem or see a situation through a different lens. The brain break actually helps to incubate and process new information.[2]

A great brain break is to do something physical that gets you in flow. Take a hike, a run, a walk around the block. Another well-known brain break is meditation — which has so many proven benefits I can’t even begin to name them all. 

Your Turn:

What kind of brain breaks can you give yourself? Which would be most helpful?  It’s not just for second graders anymore.

Here’re some ideas for you: 21 Counter-Intuitive Brain Break Ideas to Boost Your Productivity

6. Let Go of What’s Not Working

Have you ever walked through the mud and had your boot get stuck and your foot fly out? When this happens, you usually have two choices: either put your boot back on and keep plodding through, repeating the frustration as it continually gets stuck, or you can take off that boot and move forward.

The same is true in life. When we get stuck, we often stay in the mud and try to drag our boot along. We keep doing what’s clearly not working. The boot represents limiting beliefs, old habits, or stories you’re telling yourself.

Remember in the movie “Up” when Mr. Fredricksen is trying to get his house to fly? It was too heavy. He had to dump out his belongings until the house was light enough to lift off.

The same is true here; you’ve got to get rid of the emotional baggage you’re carrying so you can move forward with small steps and achieve your goals.

Take my client *Lucy for example. She was having trouble finding a job she was interested in. Through our work together, we uncovered that Lucy had an interesting belief: that having a job and being happy were mutually exclusive.

This meant she was either going to be jobless and joyful or employed and miserable. In order to move forward in her career search, she needed to take off this “boot” and believe she could find a job where she could, in fact, be happy.

Your Turn:

What’s holding you back — an old habit, limiting belief, or story you are telling yourself? How can you reframe your thinking in order to change the direction you are headed?

7. Know What You Need to Get Unstuck

We all have a way in which we operate that is unique to us. When you understand how you’re wired, you can understand more specifically what you need to get unstuck. 

For me, I need a crystal-clear picture of what I’m trying to achieve and a big, tangible goal to reach for.  When I don’t have a clear picture of the end result or challenging target I’m trying to hit, I feel stuck and unmotivated. 

Here are some common needs: 

A step-by-step plan, to understand why something is important, deadlines and impending pressure, unconditional encouragement and support, to think things through, connecting to a deeper meaning, freedom, and flexibility, and certainty.

Do you relate to any of these?

Your Turn:

What do you need to get unstuck? Think about what will help you be your best self and work through your problems. Maybe it’s a step-by-step plan, deadlines, a support system, or connection to a deeper meaning.

8. Shift Your State

Instead of placing all your focus and energy on the problem, shift your focus and energy to another part of life. Go do something that brings you joy; spend time with someone you love.

Do anything to shift your state and mood. This will switch your downward cycle of doom and gloom into an upward cycle of hope and possibility.

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A great way to shift your state away from negative emotions is to practice gratitude. So, you hate your job. Practice gratitude for other areas of your life. Does it support your family or allow you to work remotely?

Keep moving forward by practicing gratitude

    I’m not saying you should stay in a job you hate; I’m just recommending that you get perspective. A state shift brings energy, hope, and positivity into your mindset…keys to getting out of that dreaded stuck cycle.

    Your Turn:

    What always puts you in a good mood? What brings you joy, happiness or fulfillment? Do it, and make sure to practice gratitude. Try this: each morning for the next week, write down three things you are grateful for.

    9. Take Action

    Getting into action is critical to getting unstuck. There’s no substitute for momentum. Action enables further action, while inactivity creates inertia, self-doubt, and confusion.

    Successful people know this, which is why they continuously push out of their comfort zone.

    I love this quote from Simon Sinek:

    “If we think of everything we have to do, we feel overwhelmed. If we do the one thing we need to do, we make progress.”

    My client Marcus (not his real name) had just made a career move and was setting out to start his own wellness business. The biggest problem getting in his way? Inertia.

    The more he thought about what he was going to do, the bigger the endeavor began to feel. The more he explored the risks, challenges, and his extensive to-do list, the more he felt overwhelmed. He was stuck. 

    However, once he took action, starting with quick wins, he gained momentum and was able to move forward and tackle bigger and more challenging steps. Once he broke through his inaction, he was on a roll.

    My grandfather always told us: a path leads to a path. We can’t know what the future holds and trying to figure out everything before we start is a recipe for disaster.

    Know that a path will start leading us down new paths, but you have to start walking first.

    Your Turn:

    What’s the next step you can take to move forward? Where is there a quick win?

    When you think about your first (or next) step, keep it small and achievable to get the momentum going.

    10. Reach out for Help

    We can all use a little help when we’re stuck. This might be talking to a good friend who knows and understands you or reaching out to get advice from someone who’s been in a similar situation to yours.

    Maybe it’s hiring a coach who will ask powerful questions to help you see things from a different angle, a therapist who can uncover hidden roadblocks, or a consultant to share opinions and experiences.

    When you’re on your own, it can feel hopeless, overwhelming, and just plain impossible. But, a little push or pull from someone can quickly change your trajectory.

    While this may seem like one of the easiest strategies, it is actually one of the hardest to do. Why? Even though we are biologically wired to help each other, many of us find it challenging to reach out.

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    There’s a reason for this:[3]

    “Asking for help exposes us to numerous possible social threats, which is why it’s so uncomfortable. It can feel like a tacit admission of weakness, which lowers our status, and can be an invitation for scorn. It creates uncertainty, and invites the possibility of rejection.”

    Your Turn:

    Could you benefit from asking for help in this situation? Who can you reach out to ask for help right now?

    Not ready to reach out to someone just yet? Maybe you can try asking the universe. Some call this prayer, others spiritual guidance, others faith.  Whatever you call it, reach out.

    Afraid to ask for help? Here’s how to change your outlook to aim high!

    Bonus: When All Else Fails, Be Patient

    Sometimes when we’re stuck, we just need to practice patience. Patience that you’ve done all that you can and now, it’s time to wait and see what comes back to you.

    I’m not suggesting you wait for months or years; but sometimes we expect things to change quickly, yet things take time. This is especially true for big life decisions and transitions or when there are others involved, like your relationships or job.

    I love the line from Max Ehrmann’s’ Desiderata:

    “…whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.”  

    Trust the unfolding, and know that sometimes it may take a little longer than you’d like.

    There’s usually a good reason, even if you can’t see it. Maybe it’s not time to move forward or make changes just yet. Maybe you don’t have all the information you need, and when you do, you’ll quickly make progress. Maybe you’re actually stuck where you need to be right now.

    When I was in my most recent major career transition, feeling stuck and wondering if I would ever figure out my next step, this quote from Chinese Philosopher Lao Tzu was exactly what I needed:

    “Do you have the patience to wait until your mud settles and the water is clear? Can you remain unmoving till the right action arises by itself?”

    Stay strong. Be patient. The more stuck you are, the greater the freedom will feel.

    Final Thoughts

    Which of these strategies feel like they will work best for you and your current stuck situation?

    You don’t have to use all of them; it just takes one to help you keep moving forward.

    Remember, any movement, momentum or shift will help get you unstuck and move forward with your life. Besides, it’s never too late to start things over!

    More to Help You Get Unstuck

    Featured photo credit: Michał Parzuchowski via unsplash.com

    Reference

    More by this author

    Tracy Kennedy

    Lifehack's Personal Development Expert, a results-driven coach dedicated to helping people achieve greater levels of happiness and success.

    What Am I Doing With My Life? Find Your Answer Here how to stop being a perfectionist How to Stop Being a Perfectionist (Step-by-Step Guide) 10 Strategies to Keep Moving Forward When Feeling Stuck Take Back Control of your Life with Positive Emotions off track Feeling off Track in Life? Here’s How to Stay True to Yourself

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    Last Updated on November 4, 2020

    How to Know Yourself and Seek Self Improvement

    How to Know Yourself and Seek Self Improvement

    Today, most people like the idea about self-improvement. It’s trendy.

    But before you can improve yourself, you have to get to know who you are, what you want, and why it’s so crucial to know the answers to those questions.

    Once you know who you are, what you stand for, and what you want, then you can go on to work on self-improvement.

    This article will take you through the main reasons why you should take the time to get to know yourself, how to get to know yourself, and then finally how to seek self-improvement.

    Why You Should Get to Know Yourself

    Many people go through life without getting a clear understanding of themselves. There’s a difference between wanting to be someone and then the actions that creates a person. It’s easy to tell people who you are, but can you actually walk the talk?

    We have a tendency to brush away our shortcomings and play a certain role that we’ve intentionally or unintentionally created for ourselves. It may work for a while, but it won’t help you achieve anything in the long run.

    Yes, you can say you’re a good spouse. People will believe you when they see the picture-perfect image on your office, but if you go home to a different story, it doesn’t really matter.

    In the end, the opinion that matters the most are the one we hold about ourselves. A lie will drain you, overwhelm you, and unresolved emotions will resurface.

    Maybe you choose a certain path many years ago and now you feel stuck. You look in the mirror and you don’t recognize yourself. The week seems endless and it’s only 7am on a Monday morning.

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    These are just examples. It doesn’t mean that only unhappy people need to get know themselves and seek self-improvement. Even if your life is truly as great as it looks like, it’s always worth checking in with yourself.

    It’s natural to change throughout life, but too many people are afraid of reacting to this change or realize that the path they once choose may not be right anymore.

    Change is scary, but it’s even more scary to ignore your emotions and not react to them. For better or worse – change is the only constant. If you get to know yourself now, then you’ll be able to handle change better. Obviously, you can’t always control what happens to you, but you can control how you react to it.

    There’s no time limit for getting to know yourself or window of opportunity. Remember that:

    “Self-improvement and success often occur together. But that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re the same thing.”[1]

    You can be at the top of your game to the outside world, but still feel the need to get to know yourself and seek self-improvement.

    It’s never too late to get to know yourself, because once you do, then you’ll be ready for whatever comes next. When you know yourself, a new road won’t seem scary because you already know whether you’re planning on turning left or right.

    How to Get to Know Yourself

    So, it’s settled. It’s a good idea to know this person that you wake up to every morning and look at while brushing your teeth. The person in the mirror that kind of looks the same, but yet somehow seems different over time. Here comes the million dollar question: where do you start?

    Unfortunately, there isn’t a quick answer (or solution) to this. It isn’t math. There’s no right or wrong. You can’t find a page with all the secret answers and ace the test.

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    Most people will get a better feeling of who they are over time by simply looking back at their previous actions, reactions and decisions. But you can also choose to take an active part of the progress right now.

    Here are some active actions you can take to get to know yourself:

    1. Increase Your Self-Awareness

    It’s all about you now. Let the outside world exist on its own. It’s not about your neighbour or the guy from high school that posted yet another sunny picture from Dubai. It’s not about them.

    Take some time to look at yourself. What have you been doing? How do you react to certain situations? What makes you smile?

    And if you keep going back to comparing yourself to a specific person, then ask yourself why you’re so fixated on them. Figure yourself out. You’re worth knowing.

    If you want to increase your self-awareness, I recommend you take a look at this article:

    How to Increase Your Self Awareness to Be Much More Successful

    2. Face Your Fears

    It might seem obvious, but for some reason you keep avoiding that one thing.

    A lot of people let fear stand in their way even though they know deep down they have the ability to face it. It’s easy to say of course, but if you manage to overcome your weakness, it will change you for the better. You will learn from it, and you’ll know a whole lot more about your character.

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    Not sure how to conquer your fears? This guide can help you:

    How to Overcome Your Irrational Fears (That Stop You from Succeeding)

    3. Focus on Your Strengths

    It’s always a good idea to focus on what you thrive at and nurture it. It will help you become more successful, but you’ll also get a better understanding of yourself as our strengths are a big part of who we are.

    Even if you’ve been running towards the wall for a while and your head is really starting to hurt – you’ll always have some strengths in you that you can return to. Go back and focus on them and see where they’ll lead you. Maybe a talent will turn into a career. Maybe a character trait will turn into a new path or relationship.

    Now, let’s move on to how to go further and seek self-improvement.

    Ryan Holiday said:[2]

    ”You can’t learn if you think you already know. You will not find the answers if you’re too conceited and self-assured to ask the questions. You cannot get better if you’re convinced you are the best.”

    How to Seek Self-Improvement

    It’s important to leave ego behind and realize that you’ll never move forward, if you don’t accept that you’re not the best. You can always become better. Maybe you’re currently the best at your job, but you should never stop competing against yourself. It’s not about putting endless pressure on yourself. It’s about keeping yourself in movement.

    Maybe you did some soul-searching and you realized that you did choose the right path. That’s great, but it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try to improve yourself. Or maybe you just realized that you want a completely different life. You quit your job, bought a dog and moved to a new city. Great, but you’re not done yet.

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    Once you tell yourself you have done what you set out to do, then you’ll run into the same wall that knocked you out in the first place.

    Self-improvement is not about putting yourself down. Self-improvement is about lifting yourself up higher. The only way to do that is by accepting that you’re not the best. You can always become better. Even (or maybe especially) if you’re only competing against yourself.

    Bonus: 5 Self Improvement Books That You Can’t Miss

    Final Thoughts

    Self-improvement can be applied to anything from learning a new skill, learning to deal with your anger, or putting yourself in a new situation that scares you. Some people need to change their scenery completely. Some people just need to attend a meeting every Thursday. Others may need to take up a self-defence class to feel in control again.

    Sometimes life is not about gaining or achieving. Sometimes life is simply about losing and letting go.

    People are capable of doing (almost) everything that the people they admire are doing. You can’t limit yourself by saying you can’t do a specific thing, because you’re you. It all comes down to mind-set and commitment. Get to know yourself and then set out clear goals.

    Aristotle once said:

    “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”

    More Resources About Personal Growth

    Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

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