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10 Unrealistic Expectations To Give Up If You Really Want To Be Successful

10 Unrealistic Expectations To Give Up If You Really Want To Be Successful

Many people want success to be phenomenal and expect it to come quick and easy. Maybe that is why they gulp different articles on success as quick as it is churned out? Yet success is pretty unpredictable and doesn’t follow a particular trend or flow. At the end of the day you are the one to define your success and it is always better to be pretty realistic when setting your standards of success.

1. You need to wait for the right opportunity

The real truth is that nothing is ever perfect, opportunity won’t just come knocking – You have to hunt for it. Many successful people started small and made mistakes along the way. Renowned actor and WWE superstar, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson recounts that he started his wrestling career by taking 40 dollars per wrestling match. Today he earns seven to eight figures to feature in a movie.

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2. You will be happy when you become successful

Many get it wrong with such expectations. The reality is that success is more of a journey than a destination. Happiness shouldn’t be waited for; you need to appreciate every moment of the climb to the top by building on your relationships and balancing work/personal life.

3. You have to save to save

Many want to be wealthy and they think that attaining such wealth or success requires aggressive saving techniques. What they do not know about the successful is that successful people do not save to save but save to invest. When Elon Musk was undergoing a crisis to get venture capitalists to back his company SpaceX it was the millions he had saved that brought him out of the hole. Elon Musk had not saved to buy a luxurious item, he had saved to buy something that turned him into a billionaire in a couple of years.

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4. You can succeed on your own

Success is not achieved independently. Many successful people have mentors and a support group of people who contribute to their success. By staying and hanging out around other people with successful traits you ignite and multiply your chances of attaining success.

5. You define making money as success

The truth is that money is a powerful motivator – Yet money could make you bankrupt on other aspects of your life. It is better to see or view success making a contribution or adding value rather than seeing it as a way to simply add more zeros in your bank account.

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6. You need a lot of time to attain success

Many people want success fast, and with all the blog posts offering different advice on the subject many think that it is about working so hard that they get their lucky break soon. The truth is that success needs no lucky breaks but consistent effort daily, monthly and yearly. Doing this comes with a regular sense of accomplishment which keeps you fulfilled and energized.

7. You need society to validate your success

Many expect that their environment and what they can display in terms of looks and luxury items defines their success. What defines success is from within and has nothing to do with the opinions of others.

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8. You need to have an advanced degree from a well known university

This is not to say or disapprove of earning a degree from an Ivy League school. However many successful people have defined their success even from poor backgrounds and an inability to finish High school. Success needs simply a dream, a design and a consistent action to seeing your goals to fruition. Successful people like Anne Wintour, editor of Vogue of Magazine and Richard Branson, founder of Virgin Group didn’t start out with degrees from any university!

9. You will attain success at your first try

Many believe that to attain success one has to get it right the first time. This is wrong. No one gets it the first time. Successful people fail and they keep trying until they succeed. Failure plays a key role to success.

10. You will become an interesting person everybody wants to be with when you become successful

The journey of success has a way of rubbing on who one is along the way. That is why character is an important element of success. How do you define character? Is it that when you have more money and possessions, you become the person every other person wants to be around? Success will not make you a better person, that will always be up to you.

Featured photo credit: http://www.unsplash.com via download.unsplash.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on July 16, 2019

6 Effective Ways to Enhance Your Problem Solving Skills

6 Effective Ways to Enhance Your Problem Solving Skills

Have you ever thought of yourself as a problem solver? I’m guessing not. But in reality, we are constantly solving problems. And the better our problem solving skills are, the easier our lives are.

Problems arise in many shapes and forms. They can be mundane, everyday problems, or larger more complex problems:

What to have for dinner tonight?

Which route to take to work?

How to fix a project that’s running behind schedule?

How to change from an uninspiring job to a career you’re really passionate about?

Every day, you’ll be faced with at least one problem to solve. But it gets easier when you realize that problems are simply choices. There’s nothing ‘scary’ about them other than having to make a decision.

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No matter what job you’re in, where you live, who your partner is, how many friends you have, you will be judged on your ability to solve problems. Because problems equal hassles for everyone concerned. And people don’t like hassle. So the more problems you can solve, the less hassle all-round, the happier people are with you. Everyone wins.

Why Are Problem Solving Skills Important?

Problem is something hard to understand or accomplish or deal with. It can be a task, a situation, or even a person. Problem solving involves methods and skills to find the best solutions to problems.

Problem solving is important because we all have decisions to make, and questions to answer in our lives. Amazing people like Eleanor Roosevelt, Steve Jobs, Mahatma Gandhi and Martin Luther King Jr., are all great problems solvers. Good parents, teachers, doctors and waiters all have to be good at solving different sort of problems as well.

Problem solving skills are for our everyday lives.

How to Enhance Problem Solving Skills

Most people believe that you have to be very intelligent in order to be a good problem solver, but that’s not true.

You don’t have to be super smart to be a problem solver, you just need practice.

When you understand the different steps to solve a problem, you’ll be able to come up with great solutions.

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1. Focus on the Solution, Not the Problem

Neuroscientists have proven that your brain cannot find solutions if you focus on the problem.[1] This is because when you focus on the problem, you’re effectively feeding ‘negativity,’ which in turn activates negative emotions in the brain. These emotions block potential solutions.

I’m not saying you should ‘ignore the problem,’ instead, try to remain calm. It helps to first, acknowledge the problem; and then, move your focus to a solution-oriented mindset where you keep fixed on what the ‘answer’ could be, rather than lingering on ‘what went wrong’ and ‘who’s fault it is’.

2. Adapt 5 Whys to Clearly Define the Problem

5 Whys is a problem solving framework to help you get to the root of a problem.

By repeatedly asking the question “why” on a problem, you can dig into the root cause of a problem, and that’s how you can find the best solution to tackle the root problem once and for all. And it can go deeper than just asking why for five times.

For example:

If the problem is “always late to work”…

  • Why am I late to work?
    I always click the snooze button and just want to go on sleeping.
  • Why do I want to go on sleeping?
    I feel so tired in the morning.
  • Why do I feel tired in the morning?
    I slept late the night before, that’s why.
  • Why did I sleep late?
    I wasn’t sleepy after drinking coffee, and I just kept scrolling my Facebook feed and somehow I couldn’t stop.
  • Why did I drink coffee?
    Because I was too sleepy at work in the afternoon, not having enough sleep the night before.

So there you see, if you didn’t try to dig out the root of the problem, you may just set a few more alarms and have it beep every five minutes in the morning. But in fact, the problem you need to solve is to quit Facebook surfing endlessly at night so you’ll feel more energetic in the day time, and you won’t even need coffee.

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3. Simplify Things

As human beings, we have a tendency to make things more complicated than they need to be! Try simplifying your problem by generalizing it.

Remove all the details and go back to the basics. Try looking for a really easy, obvious solution – you might be surprised at the results! And we all know that it’s often the simple things that are the most productive.

4. List out as Many Solutions as Possible

Try to come up with ‘ALL POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS’ – even if they seem ridiculous at first. It’s important you keep an open mind to boost creative thinking, which can trigger potential solutions.

Coming from 10 years in the corporate advertising industry, it is drummed into you that ‘No idea is a bad idea’ and this aids creative thinking in brainstorms and other problem-solving techniques.

Whatever you do, do not ridicule yourself for coming up with ‘stupid solutions’ as it’s often the crazy ideas that trigger other more viable solutions.

5. Think Laterally

Change the ‘direction’ of your thoughts by thinking laterally. Pay attention to the saying,

‘You cannot dig a hole in a different place by digging it deeper.”

Try to change your approach and look at things in a new way. You can try flipping your objective around and looking for a solution that is the polar opposite!

Even if it feels silly, a fresh and unique approach usually stimulates a fresh solution.

6. Use Language That Creates Possibility

Lead your thinking with phrases like ‘what if…’ and ‘imagine if…’ These terms open up our brains to think creatively and encourage solutions.

Avoid closed, negative language such as ‘I don’t think…’ or ‘But this is not right…’.

The Bottom Line

There’s nothing scary about a problem when you start to adapt my advice.

Try not to view problems as ‘scary’ things! If you think about what a problem really is, it’s really just feedback on your current situation.

Every problem is telling you that something is not currently working and that you need to find a new way around it.

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So try to approach problems neutrally – without any judgment. Practice focusing on defining a problem, keep calm and not to make things too complicated.

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Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Planet of Success: Problem vs Solution Focused Thinking

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