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10 Lies People Tell Themselves To Rationalize Their Overwhelmed Schedules

10 Lies People Tell Themselves To Rationalize Their Overwhelmed Schedules

How many times have you used the excuse ‘I’m too busy now’ to turn down offers to help a friend in need or to just take time off to enjoy yourself? If you are like me, probably a lot. Yet, there is something wrong if you are so busy that living life to the fullest gets shoved down the agenda. Here are 10 lies that people keep telling themselves to justify their super busy schedules.

1. I must sleep less to get more done

It’s amazing how many people believe this. People using apps such as Fitbit found that if you cut down on sleep and get disturbed rest, your production level goes down. You may be gaining more time but you are not being more productive. These apps are useful because they can give you loads of stats on your smartphone about your fitness, productivity, and the quality of your sleep.

2. I must work longer hours to achieve more

If you increase your working hours, you actually become less efficient! The UN is also concerned about this. Their report shows that millions of people are far too busy to enjoy fuller and happier lives. They are convinced that though they are working really hard, they are not being more efficient.

The Mexican billionaire, Carlos Slim believes that people should work an 11 hour day for 3 days a week until they are 75. This is a radical view but he insists this is the way to go as people can enjoy themselves and actually be more productive until they are older.

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3. I am far too busy to take breaks

You also probably think that once you get in the zone, you will become more focused and get even more done. Well, the bad news is that your brain needs breaks to stay focused.

“From a practical standpoint, our research suggests that, when faced with long tasks (such as studying before a final exam or doing your taxes), it is best to impose brief breaks on yourself. Brief mental breaks will actually help you stay focused on your task!”- Alejandro Lleras, University of Illinois psychology professor.

4. I would never daydream or twiddle my thumbs

The surprising fact is that when we switch off our brains and begin to relax and daydream, some of the trickiest problems are solved. You might actually have experienced this Eureka moment when you are driving or taking a shower. Psychologists call this the ‘diffuse mode’. This is a sort of subconscious processing that goes on in the brain. But you need to be in a relaxed state for it to function best. You certainly can’t avail of it when you are concentrating. Daniel Kahneman has explained all this in his book Thinking Fast and Slow.

5. I just have no time to take a walk or go to the gym

Charles Dickens had a great routine. He would write until 2.p.m and then he would go for a long walk. He would sometimes walk for 30 miles! Yet, he wrote 20 novels and many short stories, all by hand.

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“If I couldn’t walk fast and far, I should just explode and perish.” – Charles Dickens.

If you want to put your brain on steroids, try doing some physical exercise

6. I know more money will solve my problems

If you work harder, you can get a promotion and get a higher salary, right? But working harder might lead to some complications like neglecting your health, family and loved ones. It might also create even more problems in trying to manage your time.

A much better idea would be to sit down and analyze your financial situation. By making a series of cuts, you could end up happier and less stressed out.

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7. If I have a busy schedule, I look more important

Busy as a bee! Yes, but the bees are producing pollen and helping to pollinate the planet. If the truth were known, appearing busy can have many rather sneaky advantages in the workplace. It can hide inefficiency and also reduce the number of interruptions. It also gives the false impression that you are really doing a great job.

Time for a reality check. Time spent on the job is not an indicator of quality, I am afraid. You will be judged on the results and also other efficiency standards.

8. I prefer multitasking because I have no choice

You are so busy that you just have to have three things on the go at the same time. Now, there is nothing wrong with talking on the phone and having a cup of coffee. Driving and texting is a different matter as it could kill you or some innocent bystander!

The problem is that when you start to do more demanding tasks which need your brain to be focused and alert, then you have to forget about multitasking. It simply does not work because you cannot focus fully on several tasks at the same time. Interrupting one task to do another is also a total waste of time. In a New York Times article, researchers reported that test takers who were interrupted and distracted performed 20% worse on tests afterwards.

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The solution is to start prioritizing and also to concentrate on one thing at a time.

9. I don’t have enough time

Time is elastic. You can stretch it either way. You can spin things out, just to look busy; or you can pack a load of things into it. It just depends on how important that task or person is to you. Everybody gets 24 hours in a day. There are no discounts, coupons or special offers.

It all boils down to time management. Using time effectively to complete tasks is what you will be judged on.

10. I can never say no

It is like a tsunami. One of the reasons you are overwhelmed is that you say yes to everybody and everything. It is great for making friends but you may be exploited.

Learning how to say no is going to protect your time credit in the bank. You will be able to safeguard your account from trivia and superficiality. You will become time rich and that is the real mark of success.

Featured photo credit: Giuseppe Savo via flickr.com

More by this author

Robert Locke

Author of Ziger the Tiger Stories, a health enthusiast specializing in relationships, life improvement and mental health.

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Last Updated on March 25, 2020

How Do You Change a Habit (According to Psychology)

How Do You Change a Habit (According to Psychology)

Habits are hard to kill, and rightly so. They are a part and parcel of your personality traits and mold your character.

However, habits are not always something over-the-top and quirky enough to get noticed. Think of subtle habits like tapping fingers when you are nervous and humming songs while you drive. These are nothing but ingrained habits that you may not realize easily.

Just take a few minutes and think of something specific that you do all the time. You will notice how it has become a habit for you without any explicit realization. Everything you do on a daily basis starting with your morning routine, lunch preferences to exercise routines are all habits.

Habits mostly form from life experiences and certain observed behaviors, not all of them are healthy. Habitual smoking can be dangerous to your health. Similarly, a habit could also make you lose out on enjoying something to its best – like how some people just cannot stop swaying their bodies when delivering a speech.

Thus, there could be a few habits that you would want to change about yourself. But changing habits is not as easy as it seems.

In this article, you will learn why it isn’t easy to build new habits, and how to change habits.

What Makes It Hard To Change A Habit?

To want to change a particular habit means to change something very fundamental about your behavior.[1] Hence, it’s necessary to understand how habits actually form and why they are so difficult to actually get out of.

The Biology

Habits form in a place what we call the subconscious mind in our brain.[2]

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Our brains have two modes of operation. The first one is an automatic pilot kind of system that is fast and works on reflexes often. It is what we call the subconscious part. This is the part that is associated with everything that comes naturally to you.

The second mode is the conscious mode where every action and decision is well thought out and follows a controlled way of thinking.

A fine example to distinguish both would be to consider yourself learning to drive or play an instrument. For the first time you try learning, you think before every movement you make. But once you have got the hang of it, you might drive without applying much thought into it.

Both systems work together in our brains at all times. When a habit is formed, it moves from the conscious part to the subconscious making it difficult to control.

So, the key idea in deconstructing a habit is to go from the subconscious to the conscious.

Another thing you have to understand about habits is that they can be conscious or hidden.

Conscious habits are those that require active input from your side. For instance, if you stop setting your alarm in the morning, you will stop waking up at the same time.

Hidden habits, on the other hand, are habits that we do without realizing. These make up the majority of our habits and we wouldn’t even know them until someone pointed them out. So the first difficulty in breaking these habits is to actually identify them. As they are internalized, they need a lot of attention to detail for self-identification. That’s not all.

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Habits can be physical, social, and mental, energy-based and even be particular to productivity. Understanding them is necessary to know why they are difficult to break and what can be done about them.

The Psychology

Habits get engraved into our memories depending on the way we think, feel and act over a particular period of time. The procedural part of memory deals with habit formation and studies have observed that various types of conditioning of behavior could affect your habit formations.

Classical conditioning or pavlovian conditioning is when you start associating a memory with reality.[3] A dog that associates ringing bell to food will start salivating. The same external stimuli such as the sound of church bells can make a person want to pray.

Operant conditioning is when experience and the feelings associated with it form a habit.[4] By encouraging or discouraging an act, individuals could either make it a habit or stop doing it.

Observational learning is another way habits could take form. A child may start walking the same way their parent does.

What Can You Do To Change a Habit?

Sure, habits are hard to control but it is not impossible. With a few tips and hard-driven dedication, you can surely get over your nasty habits.

Here are some ways that make use of psychological findings to help you:

1. Identify Your Habits

As mentioned earlier, habits can be quite subtle and hidden from your view. You have to bring your subconscious habits to an aware state of mind. You could do it by self-observation or by asking your friends or family to point out the habit for your sake.

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2. Find out the Impact of Your Habit

Every habit produces an effect – either physical or mental. Find out what exactly it is doing to you. Does it help you relieve stress or does it give you some pain relief?

It could be anything simple. Sometimes biting your nails could be calming your nerves. Understanding the effect of a habit is necessary to control it.

3. Apply Logic

You don’t need to be force-fed with wisdom and advice to know what an unhealthy habit could do to you.

Late-night binge-watching just before an important presentation is not going to help you. Take a moment and apply your own wisdom and logic to control your seemingly nastily habits.

4. Choose an Alternative

As I said, every habit induces some feeling. So, it could be quite difficult to get over it unless you find something else that can replace it. It can be a simple non-harming new habit that you can cultivate to get over a bad habit.

Say you have the habit of banging your head hard when you are angry. That’s going to be bad for you. Instead, the next time you are angry, just take a deep breath and count to 10. Or maybe start imagining yourself on a luxury yacht. Just think of something that will work for you.

5. Remove Triggers

Get rid of items and situations that can trigger your bad habit.

Stay away from smoke breaks if you are trying to quit it. Remove all those candy bars from the fridge if you want to control your sweet cravings.

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6. Visualize Change

Our brains can be trained to forget a habit if we start visualizing the change. Serious visualization is retained and helps as a motivator in breaking the habit loop.

For instance, to replace your habit of waking up late, visualize yourself waking up early and enjoying the early morning jog every day. By continuing this, you would naturally feel better to wake up early and do your new hobby.

7. Avoid Negative Talks and Thinking

Just as how our brain is trained to accept a change in habit, continuous negative talk and thinking could hamper your efforts put into breaking a habit.

Believe you can get out of it and assert yourself the same.

Final Thoughts

Changing habits isn’t easy, so do not expect an overnight change!

Habits took a long time to form. It could take a while to completely break out of it. You will have to accept that sometimes you may falter in your efforts. Don’t let negativity seep in when it seems hard. Keep going at it slowly and steadily.

More About Changing Habits

Featured photo credit: Mel via unsplash.com

Reference

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