Your life does not better by chance, it gets better by change. — Jim Rohn
So true, yet it is much easier said than done. There are many times in life where we wonder how on earth we ended up in such a miserable situation. What is even more miserable is the inability to break out of the mess. The light is clearly at the end of the tunnel, but we are not moving at all. Becoming aware of the obstacles that keep us from making change makes an incredible difference. Here are 10 obstacles that will hold you back from making change successfully:
1. Facing the Unknown.
We become comfortable with what is familiar. Even when it is detrimental to us, we are drawn toward what we already know. Change will challenge us to step out and break free from our comfort zone. Push through the barrier of the unknown through creating a vision for what you desire. Make it so real that your mind cannot tell the difference.Advertising
2. The Need for Instant Gratification.
In our “microwave culture” we expect to always see immediate results. As technology puts everything at our fingertips, we crave the same ability in other areas of life. Change does not have to be instant. Rather than try to go from black to white, do not forget about the grey area in between. Work on making incremental change rather than drastic change. Take baby steps.
3. Misinformation and Getting the Wrong Advice.
Receiving the wrong advice can really mess up your attempts to change. You may be doing everything right in terms of researching and gathering the knowledge needed to make some shifts in your life, but you could be getting them from all the wrong sources. Be careful about who you allow to speak into your life. Even people you look up to and respect may not be the right people to get advice from.
4. Pressure to Conform.
We are naturally inclined toward being in community. The need to belong. However, this can become adverse to change when the community you are in is not bringing you toward your goals. Start to explore different social groups and search for like-minded people that share your interests.Advertising
5. Overthinking your Goal.
Carefully thinking through your next big change is a good thing, until it becomes the only thing. We can spend so much time aiming but never firing. In order not to be paralyzed by this obstacle, be sure that you are regularly taking action on your plans. Think, but also do.
6. Limited Finances.
It is very true that if money was not an issue, we would all be living the dream. Money can provide a real sense of comfort and security, but it can also be a major obstacle holding back change. It may be necessary to take a little bit of a pay-cut in order for change to happen. On the other hand, you may need to begin setting some money aside and make little sacrifices- maybe one less mocha a day.
7. Questioning your Abilities.
Stop doubting yourself! You need to give yourself a little more credit about your ability to make change happen. Trust that not a single door closes without another door opening. If you are still alive and breathing, you still have the ability to make changes happen. Do no let doubt cripple you. Believe. Have some faith.Advertising
8. Being Indecisive.
Constantly changing your mind is a guaranteed way to choke out any change. You may take one step in one direction, only to stop and take another step in an entirely different direction. Ultimately, you just end up going around in circles and not making any progress. Make a decision, commit to it- at least long enough to see whether it is the right decision.
9. Trying to Live up to Family Expectations.
This one is tough, we all love our family and respect their opinions. But their opinions may very well the the obstacle keeping you from change. They may get frustrated at the choices you make, but express to your family how painful it is for you not to make the change.
10. Your Pride & Status.
Nobody likes admitting to pride- but that is just being prideful. Change may mean that you have to give up all of the ‘status’ that you worked so hard to gain. That takes humility, the opposite of pride. There is no doubt that you have worked very hard to gain the respect and position that you find yourself in, but ultimately, if there is no fulfillment in that role, it is time to take the exit.Advertising
Lastly, if you are standing on the edge and struggling to take that leap toward making the much needed change in your life, let this well known quote motivate you,
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.
Last Updated on May 26, 2020
Top 10 Reasons Why People Don’t Reach Their Goals
With everything that happens around us, it is sometimes difficult to reach our goals. This is compounded if you have any of the reasons on the list below.
Luckily, in addition to the top 10 reasons why people don’t reach their goals, I’ve included a quick fix for each of them. So let’s get to it.
1. Creating Vague Goals
When you don’t know where you are going, it is really hard to get there. Many people set themselves up for failure when they set goals that are unclear. “I want to lose weight” sounds like a great goal but the people who set this kind of goal will never reach it. It is not because the people are not motivated or disciplined but because the goal is too general. Do you want to lose 5 lbs or 50 lbs?
Quick Fix: Set SMART goals by being Specific, making sure they are Measurable, Achievable and Realistic, and last but not least — give yourself a Time deadline. If you want to go one step further, you may want to read The Missing Letter in Your Smart Goals.
2. Lacking a Higher Purpose
Goals can be set on any topic imaginable but if you don’t have a higher purpose, it makes it is easy to give up once the initial motivation and excitement wears off. Understanding how your goal is relevant to you allows you to persevere even when the going gets tough.
Quick Fix: When setting your SMART goal, ask yourself how the goal is relevant to your life and what you want to achieve.
Even when you have SMART goals that are relevant to your purpose, if you don’t get started, you’ll never achieve your goal. One of the most dangerous phrases is “I’ll do it later.”
Quick Fix: Make sure the goal has been broken down into manageable pieces and then start right away. Here are 11 Practical Ways to Stop Procrastination.
4. Not Taking Responsibility
Things will go wrong. That’s a fact of life. When something comes up and you don’t achieve your goal, who do you blame? Your boss who kept you at work late so you couldn’t work on your book or maybe the horrible weather that stopped you from going to the gym. If it’s not your fault, there is nothing you can do, right?
Quick Fix: Own up to not reaching your goals. When you take responsibility, you’ll become resourceful knowing that you have control over the attainment of your goals.
5. Listening to People Who Discourage You
When you go for your goals, especially the big ones that really count and fit in with your purpose in life, it is inevitable that people will discourage you. There are many reasons for this: concern, jealousy, ignorance, etc. How many goals have already been given up on because other people decided they were not worth pursuing?
Quick Fix: This one is easy. As long as you know the purpose for your goal, ignore the naysayers. You can take what they are saying into consideration but make sure you make the final choice.
6. Starting Too Many Projects
I’m a starter. That sounds like a good thing but not when you start too many things, you don’t end up finishing many of them. This usually stems from the fear of missing out (FOMO) or being someone who has many ideas.
Quick Fix: Understand that you have a limited amount of time and that you can’t do everything. To deal with FOMO, realize that by not finishing, you are missing out on all the opportunities that open up when you finish the projects you are working on.
7. Being Negative
If you think you’re not going to make it, then you’re probably not going to make it. If you don’t believe you’re going to reach your goal, then when you fail, it is expected which makes it easy to stop trying. When you are optimistic and a setback occurs, you focus your energy on finding solutions because you truly believe there is one. If you believe that you suffer from bad luck, check out this article.
Quick Fix: Consider the idea that optimism and pessimism are both expectations of the future. Each are equally likely to be true but which belief will help you lead a happier more fulfilled life? Instead of wasting your energy on complaining, spend that energy on learning.
8. Being Selfish
There are people out there that think it is silly to help others. They believe in taking and not giving. They are misers with their time, money and knowledge and are only interested in opportunities where they stand to benefit. Most big goals require the help of others and it is very difficult to help people who only care about taking.
Quick Fix: Serve others first. Always look for ways to add value to other people.
9. Surrounding Yourself with People Who Don’t Reach Their Goals
You are who you associate with. This may be hard to swallow for some people and there are always exceptions to the rule but for the most part, we act in accordance with the people around us. This comes from the strong ad natural desire to belong and to be accepted (think of all the dumb things you did in high school just to fit in).
Quick Fix: Associate with people who always reach their goals.
10. Watching Too Much TV
Not all TV is bad but if you are watching TV then most likely you are not doing anything to move one step closer to your goal. The problem with TV these days is that it is captivating. There are programs for all interests and hobbies and the shows keep getting better and better. Those who watch alot of TV usually don’t reach their goals and perhaps people watch TV because they don’t have any goals.
Quick Fix: Shut off the TV. Cancel the cable. Pick up a book that will help you move one step closer to your goal. Here are 6 Steps to Remove TV from your Life.
Do you have anything to add? What do you think are the reasons why people don’t reach their goals and what are your thought about the 10 reasons we have listed here. Feel free to give your own effective quick fixes for the different reasons in the comments section below.
Featured photo credit: Kyle Glenn via unsplash.com