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7 Skillful Ways You Can Learn To Enhance Your Emotional Intelligence

7 Skillful Ways You Can Learn To Enhance Your Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence, often referred to as, EI or EQ, is a form of intelligence that affects people’s self-esteem and interaction with others. There are four aspects to emotional intelligence that lead to a centered lifestyle. These are self-awareness, self-management of emotions, social relationship, and relationship management. When you raise your EQ, negative emotions are lowered and more positive decisions can be followed through with. Through strengthening these core elements, a healthy lifestyle balance can be achieved and emotional intelligence is enhanced.

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    Pay Attention To Feelings

    Take time to assess how you feel about a situation. The identification of emotions strengthens the ability to recognize emotions as they arise. Learn to assess emotions even when they are discomforting. Appraise emotions through writing down how a situation or crisis is being addressed while avoiding interrupting the chain of emotions. Let yourself feel the full impact of how you are being affected by even strong emotions. This is an ongoing enterprise; take stock of feelings and emotions frequently. Through noting emotions, especially in a stressful situation, emotions can be brought under control.

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      Allow Feelings To Flow

      Avoid judging what is being felt. Feelings come unbidden and there is no sense in judging too harshly what is being felt. This allows feelings, even very strong ones, to lessen their impact over time. A person thus learns to give themselves and others a non-judgmental way of emotional release without reservation. Allow yourself to feel what you are feeling without attempting to interrupt or avoid the feeling. Avoidance of feelings, especially very strong ones only tend to build up over time and become untenable and very difficult to live with.

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        Recognize and Manage Stress

        There is no doubt that life is stressful. How you manage stress has a direct impact on emotional intelligence. Enhancing time-management skills may be one area where stress can be reduced. Prioritize tasks and learn how to politely refuse requests that are time-consuming but not beneficial. For example, take time to help out a friend but leave the dishes for later. Make and act on those decisions that are best for you. Don’t spend time worrying about what others would do or what others think or believe about you. Take a walk to soothe and clear a mind cluttered with emotions.

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          Develop An Open Mind

          Learn to at least listen to the other side of an argument. Listening does not necessarily mean agreement. Be eager to learn and enhance your own natural intellectual curiosity. These tips help you to grow emotionally and intellectually. A means to understanding and getting along with others is in refusing to always be right; after all, no one is ever right all the time. You will also develop a means of dealing with conflict with confidence and poise. Frequently listen to debates, political and otherwise, on television and radio.

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            Develop Extrovert and Empathetic Tendencies

            Empathy is the ability to understand another’s reactions and emotions in a given situation. This important skill is developed through thinking about how others are being treated. Refuse to be isolated. Volunteering skills and getting to know people can help you develop extroversion. Through getting involved with others, you become a person who is selfless and helpful. Development of these tendencies make you a better person, more skilled toward benefiting and helping others. This does not mean allowing others to simply use or walk all over you. Rather, you become an individual willing to set boundaries and happily engage in social interactions.

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              Be Analytical and Responsive

              Think about how a decision will impact your life. Completely weigh options before acting. Be pro-active in decision-making. This is where a creative and imaginative mind serve you well. Consider the impact of hypothetical situations, such as changing jobs, getting involved in a new relationship, or moving. The consideration of a pretend scenario impacts the way a life changing situation can and will be addressed. Form goals, and write down short and long-term goals and the steps toward their ultimate achievement.

              To Thine Own Self Be True

              Ultimately, at the end of the day you must act on those decisions that impact you. Making decisions that are in alignment with your values and goal make decision-making easier. Learn to get to know yourself and like yourself both for who you are and who you will be. In recognizing your own emotions you will be more likely to develop the emotions and motivations of others around you. Know your motivations, strengths, and weaknesses. Through knowing what drives you, you will be better able to move forward with a sense of direction and confidence.

              You will gain a sense of ownership over decisions made and actions taken in your life. Engage others around you to share in all that life offers. In strengthening emotional intelligence you will cultivate a better self-esteem and a calm sense of reality.

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              References:

              http://www.helpguide.org/mental/eq5_raising_emotional_intelligence.htm

              http://www.uncommonhelp.me/articles/how-to-control-your-emotions/

              http://www.wikihow.com/Improve-Emotional-Intelligence http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/your-mind-your-body/201201/10-ways-enhance-your-emotional-intelligence

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              Last Updated on February 15, 2019

              Why Is Goal Setting Important to a Truly Fulfilling Life?

              Why Is Goal Setting Important to a Truly Fulfilling Life?

              In Personal Development-speak, we are always talking about goals, outcomes, success, desires and dreams. In other words, all the stuff we want to do, achieve and create in our world.

              And while it’s important for us to know what we want to achieve (our goal), it’s also important for us to understand why we want to achieve it; the reason behind the goal or some would say, our real goal.

              Why is goal setting important?

              1. Your needs and desire will be fulfilled.

              Sometimes when we explore our “why”, (why we want to achieve a certain thing) we realize that our “what” (our goal) might not actually deliver us the thing (feeling, emotion, internal state) we’re really seeking.

              For example, the person who has a goal to lose weight in the belief that weight loss will bring them happiness, security, fulfillment, attention, popularity and the partner of their dreams. In this instance, their “what” is weight-loss and their “why” is happiness (etc.) and a partner.

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              Six months later, they have lost the weight (achieved their goal) but as is often the case, they’re not happier, not more secure, not more confident, not more fulfilled and in keeping with their miserable state, they have failed to attract their dream partner.

              After all, who wants to be with someone who’s miserable? They achieved their practical goal but still failed to have their needs met.

              So they set a goal to lose another ten pounds. And then another. And maybe just ten more. With the destructive and erroneous belief that if they can get thin enough, they’ll find their own personal nirvana. And we all know how that story ends.

              2. You’ll find out what truly motivates you

              The important thing in the process of constructing our best life is not necessarily what goals we set (what we think we want) but what motivates us towards those goals (what we really want).

              The sooner we begin to explore, identify and understand what motivates us towards certain achievements, acquisitions or outcomes (that is, we begin moving towards greater consciousness and self awareness), the sooner we will make better decisions for our life, set more intelligent (and dare I say, enlightened) goals and experience more fulfilment and less frustration.

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              We all know people who have achieved what they set out to, only to end up in the same place or worse (emotionally, psychologically, sociologically) because what they were chasing wasn’t really what they were needing.

              What we think we want will rarely provide us with what we actually need.

              3. Your state of mind will be a lot healthier

              We all set specific goals to achieve/acquire certain things (a job, a car, a partner, a better body, a bank balance, a title, a victory) because at some level, most of us believe (consciously or not) that the achievement of those goals will bring us what we really seek; joy, fulfilment, happiness, safety, peace, recognition, love, acceptance, respect, connection.

              Of course, setting practical, material and financial goals is an intelligent thing to do considering the world we live in and how that world works.

              But setting goals with an expectation that the achievement of certain things in our external, physical world will automatically create an internal state of peace, contentment, joy and total happiness is an unhealthy and unrealistic mindset to inhabit.

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              What you truly want and need

              Sometimes we need to look beyond the obvious (superficial) goals to discover and secure what we really want.

              Sadly, we live in a collective mindset which teaches that the prettiest and the wealthiest are the most successful.

              Some self-help frauds even teach this message. If you’re rich or pretty, you’re happy. If you’re both, you’re very happy. Pretty isn’t what we really want; it’s what we believe pretty will bring us. Same goes with money.

              When we cut through the hype, the jargon and the self-help mumbo jumbo, we all have the same basic goals, desires and needs:

              Joy, fulfilment, happiness, safety, peace, recognition, love, acceptance, respect, connection.

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              Nobody needs a mansion or a sport’s car but we all need love.

              Nobody needs massive pecs, six percent body-fat, a face lift or bigger breasts but we all need connection, acceptance and understanding.

              Nobody needs to be famous but we all need peace, calm, balance and happiness.

              The problem is, we live in a culture which teaches that one equals the other. If only we lived in a culture which taught that real success is far more about what’s happening in our internal environment, than our external one.

              It’s a commonly-held belief that we’re all very different and we all have different goals — whether short term or long term goals. But in many ways we’re not, and we don’t; we all want essentially the same things.

              Now all you have to do is see past the fraud and deception and find the right path.

              Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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