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5 Things to Remember When You Are Suicidal

5 Things to Remember When You Are Suicidal

Suicide is not a new phenomenon. People have committed it in the ancient past and as per the data shared by Gapminder—an organization that is fighting ignorance with fact-based worldviews that everyone can understand—the incidence rate has not come down. On the contrary suicidal tendencies are birthed in depression, eventually leading to the extreme step! Now that we have realized it, let us find ways to deal with it! Remember these 5 things to save yourself and your friends from bouts of depression and eventually from suicide.

1. You only get one body in this lifetime.

This mortal body of ours will not be around forever. It is a temporary vessel through which we can briefly experience life on Earth. You only have one body in this lifetime, and there are so many things you can do with it. It would be a shame to throw it away. Would it not be worth it to take good care of your own self? In fact, when people take their own lives, they think that it is the only solution to end suffering. This is simply not true.

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2. Suicide is not a problem-solver.

People who commit suicide have this deceptive notion that it is a great problem-solver. On the contrary, it creates more problems than it solves! Man has been ever so deceived to believe that ending something that is so temporary in the first place is the best way of dealing with it. Understanding this fact will help us when such thoughts creep into our mind.

3. Start spending more time with others.

I have been to hospitals before where all I could think about was that my ailment was big and painful. But when I arrive at the hospital and look around, I see that there are so many people who are in greater pain than me. To cut it short, life and problems are synonymous. It will help to know that your friends and colleagues have problems that are graver than or equal to your own. Start spending time with them. Your problems will start fading away! Even the rich and the glamorous have their own problems. Some say, that money solves all problems. But a great teacher St. Paul, taught, For the love of money, is the root of all evil.

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4. Call your friends, even if you don’t want to.

When depression hits you, you tend to retreat into a shell like a tortoise’s head! But deep inside, you yearn for someone to help you out. It is disheartening to know that in this age of technology, suicide rates have reached an all-time high.  It would be prudent to keep the contact details of a few people whom you really trust and can share things with complete privacy. This is most difficult bit when you are fighting depression! Working Mantra: Fight depression to Fight suicide ! 

5. Spend time with Nature.

I am sure that we all enjoy Mother Nature in all her beauty. Who doesn’t want to travel, explore new places and marvel at the beauty of life? But somehow, the inertia of our lives hold us back! It is time to move out of our self-made concrete cages and into Nature’s caring lap, at least every once in a while. The vast expanse of green & yellow fields, blue skies and the roaring seas, the sun, moon and stars are all FREE. Some wise man said, “The best things in life are free.”

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We need to realize that we have to strive to rise above the things causing clatter in our lives, including iPhones and emails.  Trust me, Nature has an amazing way of communicating, loving and healing us. Try it—it works !

Featured photo credit: Ashley Rose via flickr.com

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Last Updated on January 3, 2020

The 10 Essential Habits of Positive People

The 10 Essential Habits of Positive People

Are you waiting for life events to turn out the way you want so that you can feel more positive about your life? Do you find yourself having pre-conditions to your sense of well-being, thinking that certain things must happen for you to be happier? Do you think there is no way that your life stresses can make you anything other than “stressed out” and that other people just don’t understand?  If your answer is “yes” to any of these questions, you might find yourself lingering in the land of negativity for too long!

The following are some tips to keep positive no matter what comes your way. This post will help you stop looking for what psychologists call “positivity” in all the wrong places!  Here are the ten essential habits of positive people.

1. Positive people don’t confuse quitting with letting go.

Instead of hanging on to ideas, beliefs, and even people that are no longer healthy for them, they trust their judgement to let go of negative forces in their lives.  Especially in terms of relationships, they subscribe to The Relationship Prayer which goes:

 I will grant myself the ability to trust the healthy people in my life … 

To set limits with, or let go of, the negative ones … 

And to have the wisdom to know the DIFFERENCE!

 2.  Positive people don’t just have a good day – they make a good day.

Waiting, hoping and wishing seldom have a place in the vocabulary of positive individuals. Rather, they use strong words that are pro-active and not reactive. Passivity leads to a lack of involvement, while positive people get very involved in constructing their lives. They work to make changes to feel better in tough times rather than wish their feelings away.

3. For the positive person, the past stays in the past.

Good and bad memories alike stay where they belong – in the past where they happened. They don’t spend much time pining for the good ol’ days because they are too busy making new memories now. The negative pulls from the past are used not for self-flagellation or unproductive regret, but rather productive regret where they use lessons learned as stepping stones towards a better future.

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4. Show me a positive person and I can show you a grateful person.

The most positive people are the most grateful people.  They do not focus on the potholes of their lives.  They focus on the pot of gold that awaits them every day, with new smells, sights, feelings and experiences.  They see life as a treasure chest full of wonder.

5. Rather than being stuck in their limitations, positive people are energized by their possibilities.

Optimistic people focus on what they can do, not what they can’t do.  They are not fooled to think that there is a perfect solution to every problem, and are confident that there are many solutions and possibilities.  They are not afraid to attempt new solutions to old problems, rather than spin their wheels expecting things to be different this time.  They refuse to be like Charlie Brown expecting that this time Lucy will not pull the football from him!

6. Positive people do not let their fears interfere with their lives!

Positive people have observed that those who are defined and pulled back by their fears never really truly live a full life. While proceeding with appropriate caution, they do not let fear keep them from trying new things. They realize that even failures are necessary steps for a successful life. They have confidence that they can get back up when they are knocked down by life events or their own mistakes, due to a strong belief in their personal resilience.

7. Positive people smile a lot!

When you feel positive on the inside it is like you are smiling from within, and these smiles are contagious. Furthermore, the more others are with positive people, the more they tend to smile too! They see the lightness in life, and have a sense of humor even when it is about themselves. Positive people have a high degree of self-respect, but refuse to take themselves too seriously!

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8. People who are positive are great communicators.

They realize that assertive, confident communication is the only way to connect with others in everyday life.  They avoid judgmental, angry interchanges, and do not let someone else’s blow up give them a reason to react in kind. Rather, they express themselves with tact and finesse.  They also refuse to be non-assertive and let people push them around. They refuse to own problems that belong to someone else.

9. Positive people realize that if you live long enough, there are times for great pain and sadness.

One of the most common misperceptions about positive people is that to be positive, you must always be happy. This can not be further from the truth. Anyone who has any depth at all is certainly not happy all the time.  Being sad, angry, disappointed are all essential emotions in life. How else would you ever develop empathy for others if you lived a life of denial and shallow emotions? Positive people do not run from the gamut of emotions, and accept that part of the healing process is to allow themselves to experience all types of feelings, not only the happy ones. A positive person always holds the hope that there is light at the end of the darkness.  

10. Positive person are empowered people – they refuse to blame others and are not victims in life.

Positive people seek the help and support of others who are supportive and safe.They limit interactions with those who are toxic in any manner, even if it comes to legal action and physical estrangement such as in the case of abuse. They have identified their own basic human rights, and they respect themselves too much to play the part of a victim. There is no place for holding grudges with a positive mindset. Forgiveness helps positive people become better, not bitter.

How about you?  How many habits of positive people do you personally find in yourself?  If you lack even a few of these 10 essential habits, you might find that the expected treasure at the end of the rainbow was not all that it was cracked up to be. How could it — if you keep on bringing a negative attitude around?

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I wish you well in keeping positive, because as we all know, there is certainly nothing positive about being negative!

Featured photo credit: Janaína Castelo Branco via flickr.com

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