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15 Things to Remember if You Love a Person with Crohn’s Disease

15 Things to Remember if You Love a Person with Crohn’s Disease

Many otherwise intelligent individuals have the rather insensitive view that Crohn’s Disease is simply a nice medical term for an illness that people have because they lack self-control. To them, everyone has bowel troubles, some more than others, and that all it takes is watching what one eats and drinks in order to have normal intestinal operation. They also become frustrated with Crohn’s sufferers, thinking that they exaggerate their symptoms and just need to take a few antacids or anti-diarrhoea pills.

Crohn’s is classified as an autoimmune disease, in which the body is actually producing antibodies that act against itself, much like the more commonly known Lupus. Just getting the fact out that it really is a serious disease and not just a “condition” is truly important, because misinformation makes it hard to develop empathy for a friend or partner with this disease. That said, here are 15 things that Crohn’s sufferers will endure that require understanding, patience, and support.

1. They can’t participate in a lot of sports and other social activities as young people

Imagine you are a 16-year old girl who would love to go out with her friends for the evening. Maybe they want to drive around, stop at a few other friends’ homes, and stop at a fast-food place for burgers and fries. For the teen with Crohn’s, this means not eating all day in order to avoid embarrassing diarrhoea accidents, and certainly not participating in the fast-food stop. Suppose you are a teen boy wearing an excretion bag – how do you shower with your classmates after PE class? Parents and other adults need to be happy to make comforting accommodations for these teens, and that includes the PE teacher-jock who may not have a tendency for a lot of empathy. Wise parents have meetings with school personnel and make certain that all reasonable accommodations have been made, including a quick exit from class without permission.

2. They know it’s better not to consume alcohol

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    So, when everyone is having a grand time at happy hour and putting pressure for the Crohn’s sufferer to have a beer, they wonder why they won’t drink. Are they anti-social; are they a recovering alcoholic? A sufferer with a pretty solid self-image may be able to explain the disease a bit. Good friends and partners understand and make an extra effort to make the sufferer feel comfortable, even in an environment of drinking.

    3. They get depressed easily, because the disease seems to control so much of their daily lives

    As Bethany Townsend, famous model and make-up artist claims, she left her career for years because of her “bag” and only recently was able to put on a bikini and post it on Facebook with the support and encouragement of her husband. Because of the overwhelming support she then received from Facebook fans she is back modeling and over her depression. Most Crohn’s sufferers do not give up public and promising careers, but they do have periods of depression. Making an effort to really understand how the simple things you take for granted can be big hurdles for your loved one will go a long way.

    4. They may skip meals in order to avoid having to go to the bathroom

    Weight is a rather sensitive topic for people with Chrohn’s. Oftentimes it’s easier for them to say they’ve been sticking to some brand new diet plan for weight loss than admitting they don’t want to have lunch with you because they might afterwards get stuck in the bathroom for hours. Skipping meals is one big concern for medical professionals dealing with Crohn’s patients because the potential for severe weight loss and even anemia are always present. A current study involving 3700 patients from over 40 countries is underway to research the efficacy of some new medications that will reduce the levels of the culprit antibodies and thus onset of acute and severe diarrhea is currently underway and does show some promise.

    5. They can suffer embarrassingly severe diarrhea, especially in public places

    They have to look for the nearest restroom when they are out, and this can be irritating to social acquaintances and partners who just don’t have the empathy they should. Being seated in a restaurant for the Crohn’s sufferer is a “huge” consideration, and others need to be supportive and kind about it, even if it means a bit longer wait for a table.

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    6. Being overly tired is a symptom of the disease, not an “avoidance” tactic as some have decided to believe

    Normal daily activities of school and work can be exhausting, and this is a real physical symptom. Friends, family members and partners need to cease complaining or showing irritation when the individual needs a nap or simply does not have the energy to engage in physically-demanding activities after a long day. Plan those activities on weekends when there are no other physical and mental demands on the sufferer.

    7. They may not be able to have the social lives that others do

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      Teens avoid sleepovers, swim parties, and overnight trips with friends; adults may avoid such things as camping trips or picnics and barbecues, or adventurous trips to far away lands where restrooms might not be immediately available.

      8. They may carry extra toilet paper, wear “Depends,” and always have an extra set of clothing with them (for serious cases)

      Again, that’s something they are really embarrassed to admit. Understanding these behaviors is critical for friends and partners who truly want to make life as comfortable as possible for a Crohn’s sufferer. Instead of showing irritation because a road trip may involve more than the average number of restroom stops along the way, the empathetic fellow traveler will take it all in stride, be cheerful and accommodating. Should an accident occur, it is important to know whether the “victim” wants help or wants to deal with the problem on his/her own.

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      9. They are self-conscious about the clothing they wear so that bags don’t show

      If you love this person, make extra efforts to compliment their dress and appearance.

      10. They can’t always sleep well

      There is discomfort a lot of the time, and this is not an exaggeration. Think of times when you have a bad bout of stomach gas with cramps and diarrhea. People with Crohn’s have to deal with this most of the time, even in the middle of the night. Stop complaining about being awakened, and give them a reassuring hug instead. Here are more tips about getting a better sleep if you have Crohn’s.

      11. They may prefer not to go out to eat

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        This can be a “bummer” when friends who are couples invite you to go out to dinner. If your loved one’s symptoms are acute, this is not going to be an option. If they are not acute, and the outing is planned, be certain that the restaurant chosen has mild foods that your loved can tolerate more easily. Several studies currently being conducted by the Crohn’s and Colitis Foundation are attempting to develop means by which normal microbe activity can be stimulated in the gastrointestinal tract that may ultimately allow those with the disease eat more normally. This would be a huge breakthrough!

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        12. They plan when they will eat certain foods, because they know how they will be affected and will need to be physically in a “safe” place

        Don’t try to “force” your loved one to eat anything or anywhere if they are not truly comfortable with the food and/or the environment. You certainly don’t have to change your eating habits because of their disease, but neither should they ever have to change theirs to please yours. Certainly there a lot of great foods both for you and your loved one to digest normally.

        13. Airline bookings may seem like a minor deal to you, but to the Crohn’s sufferer, maybe not

        Be mindful that seating has to be close to the bathroom, and, if there is an accident because the bathroom is occupied at a moment of crisis, be reassuring and comforting. They are embarrassed enough without your expression of embarrassment too.

        14. They understand that there is no cure and that researchers are looking at multiple causes

        Those include but not limited to genetics, previous infections, immune system failures, and environmental factors such as junk food and too many antibiotics earlier in life. Understand that they are keeping apprised of any research that is ongoing and any new promising treatments, and that they will certainly take it up with their doctor. Instead of resenting, the time spent on reading up on these potential treatments and the conversation that they may want to have about them, be a good listener, be encouraging and be positive.

        15. They have fears that they may seem abnormal to you

        Just walking the dog can cause anxiety, if the walk will be pretty long; they fear that they may embarrass themselves or you. Imagine the anxiety of going to your boss’s home for dinner or a barbecue; imagine the anxiety of going to a child’s soccer or basketball game, sitting up in the stands and not being able to get down through the crowd to reach a restroom in time. You have to validate these fears and be willing to compromise. You can’t truly understand the fears because you don’t have the disease, but you must be willing to validate them with both words and behaviors.

        Featured photo credit: Single woman alone swinging on the beach and looking the other seat missing a boyfriend via shutterstock.com

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        Elena Prokopets

        Freelance Writer

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        Last Updated on July 18, 2019

        10 Small Changes To Make Your House Feel Like A Home

        10 Small Changes To Make Your House Feel Like A Home

        Your house is more than just a building that you live in. It should be a home that makes you feel welcome as soon as you open the front door.

        Making your house feel like a home is not something that simply happens on its own. You need to make some changes to a house when you move in, to give it that cozy, warm feeling that turns it into a true home. To help you speed the process, follow this guide to 10 small changes to make your house feel like a home.

        1. Make the Windows Your Own

        When you move into a home, they often come with boring Venetian blinds or less than attractive curtains.

        One of the best ways you can instantly warm your home and make it showcase your style is to add some new window dressing. Adding beautiful curtains not only improves your home’s appearance, but it can also help to control the temperature.

        2. Put up Some Art

        If you have a lot of bare walls in your home, it will seem sterile no matter how beautiful your paint or wallpaper is.

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        Hanging art on the walls will instantly give it personality and make it feel like home.

        3. Improve the Aroma

        A house that is not filled with inviting smells will never feel like a home. There are loads of ways you can make your home smell nice. There are tons of air fresheners on the market you can use.

        Incense and scented candles are a nice option as well. Don’t forget that baking in a home is also a great way to fill it with an aroma that instantly smells like home as soon as you open the front door.

        4. Put out Lots of Pillows and Throws

        A great way to make your home look warm and inviting is to place lots of pillows and throws out on the furniture. It is much better to have too many pillows than not enough.

        There is nothing like the feeling of sinking into a cushiony pillow that feels like a cloud to make you feel like you are at home.

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        5. Instantly Class up Your Closet

        If your closet is filled with wire or plastic hangers, it will never truly feel homey. To instantly make your closet feel classy, change out your old hangers for wooden ones.

        Not only do they look great, but they are better for hanging your clothes as well.

        6. Improve Your Air Quality

        One of the most overlooked ways to make your house feel more like a home is to improve its air quality.

        The easiest and best way to upgrade the air quality in your home is to change the old, dirty filters in your furnace regularly. Get some air filters delivered to your home so that you always have some on hand.

        7. Fill it with Plants

        Another way to improve the air quality in your home is to fill it with plants. You should have plants in every room of your home.

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        They help to improve the air quality and they look beautiful. As well as making your home appear homier, plants also help to boost your mood and lower your stress levels.

        8. Change the Doorknobs

        Most people don’t really give their doorknobs a second thought unless they are broken. That is a shame because changing your doorknobs is an easy way to add personality to your home.

        Changing your old, boring doorknobs to new ones that are works of art will instantly brighten your home.

        9. Upgrade Your Tub or Shower

        There is nothing like luxuriating in a whirlpool bath or steam shower to make the cares of the day melt away. Your family deserves a bit of luxury when they are in their bathroom.

        Install a new shower or tub today to make your bathroom worthy of a place in your home.

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        10. Fresh Cut Flowers

        You can make any room in your house feel homier by placing a vase full of beautiful flowers in it. The gorgeous look and intoxicating aroma of fresh cut flowers will immediately brighten your day when you encounter them.

        You don’t have to make all these changes at once. Try one or two a day though, and your house will feel like a home before you know it. The trick is to constantly keep adding these homey touches to make your home a place worthy of its name.

        Featured photo credit: https://www.pexels.com/photo/black-wooden-round-analog-wall-clock-on-brown-wooden-wall-121537/ via unsplash.com

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