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13 Struggles Your Dad Faced to Be a Good Father

13 Struggles Your Dad Faced to Be a Good Father

Sometimes, it can be easier to appreciate your mother more than your father, especially if your mother stayed home with you during your youth. But when you look a little closer, you will see how much responsibility falls on the shoulders of your father to ensure stability in the home as well—financially, emotionally, physically and sometimes spiritually. Here are some things your dad probably went through in order to be a great father to you.

1. He put family first.

There were times when your dad didn’t feel like getting out of bed and heading to work or when he wanted to pursue his artistic dreams instead, but he had to put all of that on hold to make sure his children could attain and fulfill their dreams.

2. He had to act stupid to make his kids laugh.

Perhaps you can call it “humbling,” but he was happy to act out a bit silly to make sure his kids were happy, whether it was dressing like a clown or singing a nursery rhyme.

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3. He had to buy a lot of books—kid’s books.

Buying books became necessary. Sometimes, it even went beyond that: he had to become familiar with the characters, authors and the bookseller.

4. He had to be the perfect role model.

He may not have been as good looking as Tom Hanks or a Tom Cruise, but he had to be wonderful enough for his kids to be proud of him. His kids observed his actions most of the time, and wanted to be sure he practiced what he preached; this meant he had to meet certain personal standards to be the ideal father.

5. He had to read to his children.

If you thought it stopped with buying a book, you would be amazed how much action he had to take after that. If he didn’t stick to the routine and read you Dr. Seuss, he’d have to be there to console you after the resulting nightmares and anxiety you felt from not getting your nightly reading fix.

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6. He had to do some dirty work.

Even if his spouse was the one making the meals and changing the diapers or other household chores, perhaps he had to be there to deal with the major handy-work, or at least, he had to call someone he knew to be handy.

7. He had to give you a father-child sex talk.

When you reached adolescence and you needed to learn about your body and the body of the opposite gender and face awkwardness, he was there to offer you a heads-up. Although it may not have been a comfortable chat for him, it bonded you and helped you out in the long run.

8. He had to manage his emotions.

Even if he cried, he never did it in front of the family. When there were difficult and tempestuous situations, he would act as an umbrella or a shield for the family. He didn’t lose control of his temper; somehow, he had to be the man to handle the situation just right.

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9. He had to be mature.

He had to put away all signs of immaturity and face what was ahead of him in his family. He had to be firm on himself and quit acting like a child. He understood the importance of being at your basketball game rather than having a drink with his friends.

10. He wanted the best for you.

He may have never had the best of things in life; things may have been rough for him as he grew older, but he never used that as an excuse not to give you the best, which you deserved.

11. He was attentive to your needs.

He would listen and wanted to understand your opinion on a subject. He didn’t ridicule you for speaking out, but he would commend you and offered a listening ear.

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12. He didn’t miss your birthdays.

Nothing could be more important than for him to be there for you as you turned older. He never forgot it. And he bought you presents and offered you more responsibility as you matured.

13. He gave you the best education.

He wanted you to be able to stand confidently and have a place in society. He wanted to brag about you and say special things to his friends about you. He had to give you the best education—even if the price could be high, he didn’t mind working extra hard.

Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Casey Imafidon

Founder of Caseyimafidon.com which provides actionable articles to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

How to Stay Calm and Cool When You Are Extremely Stressful

How to Stay Calm and Cool When You Are Extremely Stressful

Being in a hurry all the time drains your energy. Your work and routine life make you feel overwhelmed. Getting caught up in things beyond your control stresses you out…

If you’d like to stay calm and cool in stressful situations, put the following 8 steps into practice:

1. Breathe

The next time you’re faced with a stressful situation that makes you want to hurry, stop what you’re doing for one minute and perform the following steps:

  • Take five deep breaths in and out (your belly should come forward with each inhale).
  • Imagine all that stress leaving your body with each exhale.
  • Smile. Fake it if you have to. It’s pretty hard to stay grumpy with a goofy grin on your face.

Feel free to repeat the above steps every few hours at work or home if you need to.

2. Loosen up

After your breathing session, perform a quick body scan to identify any areas that are tight or tense. Clenched jaw? Rounded shoulders? Anything else that isn’t at ease?

Gently touch or massage any of your body parts that are under tension to encourage total relaxation. It might help to imagine you’re in a place that calms you: a beach, hot tub, or nature trail, for example.

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3. Chew slowly

Slow down at the dinner table if you want to learn to be patient and lose weight. Shoveling your food down as fast as you can is a surefire way to eat more than you need to (and find yourself with a bellyache).

Be a mindful eater who pays attention to the taste, texture, and aroma of every dish. Chew slowly while you try to guess all of the ingredients that were used to prepare your dish.

Chewing slowly will also reduce those dreadful late-night cravings that sneak up on you after work.

4. Let go

Cliche as it sounds, it’s very effective.

The thing that seems like the end of the world right now?

It’s not. Promise.

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Stressing and worrying about the situation you’re in won’t do any good because you’re already in it, so just let it go.

Letting go isn’t easy, so here’s a guide to help you:

21 Things To Do When You Find It Hard To Let Go

5. Enjoy the journey

Focusing on the end result can quickly become exhausting. Chasing a bold, audacious goal that’s going to require a lot of time and patience? Split it into several mini-goals so you’ll have several causes for celebration.

Stop focusing on the negative thoughts. Giving yourself consistent positive feedback will help you grow patience, stay encouraged, and find more joy in the process of achieving your goals.

6. Look at the big picture

The next time you find your stress level skyrocketing, take a deep breath, and ask yourself:

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Will this matter to me…

  • Next week?
  • Next month?
  • Next year?
  • In 10 years?

Hint: No, it won’t.

I bet most of the stuff that stresses you wouldn’t matter the next week, maybe not even the next day.

Stop agonizing over things you can’t control because you’re only hurting yourself.

7. Stop demanding perfection of yourself

You’re not perfect and that’s okay. Show me a person who claims to be perfect and I’ll show you a dirty liar.

Demanding perfection of yourself (or anybody else) will only stress you out because it just isn’t possible.

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8. Practice patience every day

Below are a few easy ways you can practice patience every day, increasing your ability to remain calm and cool in times of stress:

  • The next time you go to the grocery store, get in the longest line.
  • Instead of going through the drive-thru at your bank, go inside.
  • Take a long walk through a secluded park or trail.

Final thoughts

Staying calm in stressful situations is possible, all you need is some daily practice.

Taking deep breaths and eat mindfully are some simple ways to train your brain to be more patient. But changing the way you think of a situation and staying positive are most important in keeping cool whenever you feel overwhelmed and stressful.

Featured photo credit: Brooke Cagle via unsplash.com

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