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13 Struggles Your Dad Faced to Be a Good Father

13 Struggles Your Dad Faced to Be a Good Father

Sometimes, it can be easier to appreciate your mother more than your father, especially if your mother stayed home with you during your youth. But when you look a little closer, you will see how much responsibility falls on the shoulders of your father to ensure stability in the home as well—financially, emotionally, physically and sometimes spiritually. Here are some things your dad probably went through in order to be a great father to you.

1. He put family first.

There were times when your dad didn’t feel like getting out of bed and heading to work or when he wanted to pursue his artistic dreams instead, but he had to put all of that on hold to make sure his children could attain and fulfill their dreams.

2. He had to act stupid to make his kids laugh.

Perhaps you can call it “humbling,” but he was happy to act out a bit silly to make sure his kids were happy, whether it was dressing like a clown or singing a nursery rhyme.

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3. He had to buy a lot of books—kid’s books.

Buying books became necessary. Sometimes, it even went beyond that: he had to become familiar with the characters, authors and the bookseller.

4. He had to be the perfect role model.

He may not have been as good looking as Tom Hanks or a Tom Cruise, but he had to be wonderful enough for his kids to be proud of him. His kids observed his actions most of the time, and wanted to be sure he practiced what he preached; this meant he had to meet certain personal standards to be the ideal father.

5. He had to read to his children.

If you thought it stopped with buying a book, you would be amazed how much action he had to take after that. If he didn’t stick to the routine and read you Dr. Seuss, he’d have to be there to console you after the resulting nightmares and anxiety you felt from not getting your nightly reading fix.

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6. He had to do some dirty work.

Even if his spouse was the one making the meals and changing the diapers or other household chores, perhaps he had to be there to deal with the major handy-work, or at least, he had to call someone he knew to be handy.

7. He had to give you a father-child sex talk.

When you reached adolescence and you needed to learn about your body and the body of the opposite gender and face awkwardness, he was there to offer you a heads-up. Although it may not have been a comfortable chat for him, it bonded you and helped you out in the long run.

8. He had to manage his emotions.

Even if he cried, he never did it in front of the family. When there were difficult and tempestuous situations, he would act as an umbrella or a shield for the family. He didn’t lose control of his temper; somehow, he had to be the man to handle the situation just right.

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9. He had to be mature.

He had to put away all signs of immaturity and face what was ahead of him in his family. He had to be firm on himself and quit acting like a child. He understood the importance of being at your basketball game rather than having a drink with his friends.

10. He wanted the best for you.

He may have never had the best of things in life; things may have been rough for him as he grew older, but he never used that as an excuse not to give you the best, which you deserved.

11. He was attentive to your needs.

He would listen and wanted to understand your opinion on a subject. He didn’t ridicule you for speaking out, but he would commend you and offered a listening ear.

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12. He didn’t miss your birthdays.

Nothing could be more important than for him to be there for you as you turned older. He never forgot it. And he bought you presents and offered you more responsibility as you matured.

13. He gave you the best education.

He wanted you to be able to stand confidently and have a place in society. He wanted to brag about you and say special things to his friends about you. He had to give you the best education—even if the price could be high, he didn’t mind working extra hard.

Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on September 10, 2019

7 Morning Rituals to Empower Your Day And Change Your Life

7 Morning Rituals to Empower Your Day And Change Your Life

Most of your reality is not a given. It is shaped by your expectations, beliefs and thoughts you have formed about it. A big chunk of these beliefs and expectations are encoded into habits you integrate in your daily life.

Yes, some of these habits are formed unconsciously and can be counter-productive or limiting but conversely, you can consciously form positive habits that will transform and empower your life significantly.

This is a powerful point of departure that more and more people are becoming aware of. The most common trait of highly successful people is the recognition of the power they have in co-creating their reality through changing the way they think, believe or expect their reality to be.

One of the most effective ways of changing our belief patterns is through practising and maintaining daily rituals. Ancient traditions had clearly understood the power of rituals in reinforcing habits and changing the way we see and create our reality a long, long time ago.

Once again, if you look into the life history of any highly successful individual, you will find some form of ritual in their daily routine. Some of these rituals may seem banal or eccentric but don’t be deceived by appearances. Rituals are one of the most effective self-empowering tools freely available at the practitioner’s disposal – that is, you!

Below are some the easiest yet life-changing morning rituals you can do every day. Of course, you can have your own afternoon or bed-time rituals but morning rituals are extremely effective in empowering your day since they help you charge yourself before it all starts.

1. Gratitude

Feeling gratitude and appreciation for those little signs and moments of joy happening in your life is probably one of the most overlooked or underestimated rituals. It is a perfect morning ritual to start your day on a very positive key.

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The real power of gratitude is that it makes you pick out and focus on what is working in your life – what is in tune with your being as a whole. It is selectively positive. It reinforces happiness and positivity by shedding light on those awesome things, small or big, that grace your everyday living.

Quite often, we just pick out the pain points, the problems, the bottle necks, whatever it is that is not working in our life and causing friction, anxiety and unhappiness. This is like constantly rewriting the script of your life with a negative or tragic overtone. Your subconscious mind follows faithfully that script you write whether it is a negative or positive one.

So feeling gratitude is undoubtedly an immensely empowering ritual. Start your day by being thankful for those positive things that happened the previous day or throughout the week. It could be something really petty and small. It doesn’t matter. You might be grateful for an unexpected visit from an old friend, a beautiful encounter with a kind stranger, a new opportunity or whatever it is that shines your way. Do it every morning and see what happens during the day.

Gratitude-Quotes

    2. Writing Down Your Most Important Tasks

    This is a very practical ritual. Start your day by identifying and writing down from one to three of the most important tasks you need to complete during that day. These tasks are ones which support important long term goals that are aligned to your purpose, passion or general direction in life.

    For example, if writing a book or building an online community are important long term goals which are aligned to your personal growth, then an important task for the day might be finishing off a particular page or two of the book or coming up with fresh content ideas for the online community.

    What is important with this ritual is that you identify these tasks and complete them as early in the day as possible. Of course, you will have other tasks apart from the ones you will write down but, these are tasks which can be tackled later or batched up and carried out in one go.

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    Writing down your most important tasks in the morning helps you focus your day and life according to what is essential. It helps you prioritize and manage your time better. As a result, you simplify your life by applying your focus and energy on what really counts for your overall life progress.

    3. Affirm Your Goals in Writing or Drawing

    This is similar to the previous idea but different in its application and purpose. Writing down your most important tasks of the day is a way to have a concrete structure of action to follow. Affirming your goals, on the other hand, is a very powerful way of crystallizing your vision and goals in life into your everyday mental space.

    Writing down or doodling your goals on a piece of paper helps you externalize those goals by giving them form. In return, they are reflected back in your subconscious mind and thus, reinforcing them and integrating them more wholly.

    An example of this would be writing down “I am achieving greater success in my career” or “I am becoming healthier and stronger through my exercise.” Notice the present tense being used as a way to tell yourself you are in the process already. Remember the life script we subconsciously follow? You are basically modifying the script to be applied now in the present.

    Drawing or doodling can be equally, or even more, effective  (if you are more of a visual person) as it summarizes a graphical representation of your goals. For example, if your goal is to build a new house or live in another country, you can draw the house or draw things that symbolise the country you want to live in.

    write down goals

      4. Practice Qi Gong Exercises

      According to Chinese philosophy, Qi (pronounced ‘Chee’) means the life force or energy inherent in all things;[1] and Qi Gong is the practice to cultivate and circulate that energy in your body. This may sound esoteric or complicated but actually, Qi Gong is really a set of simple exercises aimed at increasing your health and vitality.

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      There are numerous forms and practices available for free through the online media. As a morning ritual, I recommend following these simple exercises by Qi Gong master Lee Holden:

      5. Drink Hot Water with Lemon

      Simply add a slice of lemon in a glass of hot water and drink one every morning. This is a very simple ritual I follow faithfully every morning.

      Apart from being a good source of vitamin C and a great way of flushing out toxins in the morning, it balances and maintains the PH levels in the body, reduces pain and inflammation in joints and knees and helps nourishing brain and nerve cells. Here are some more benefits of drinking hot water with lemon.

      6. Rise Earlier

      The practical advantages of waking up early are obvious.

      For example, you gain more time for doing exercise such as walking, cycling or Qi Gong as suggested above. You gain more time to be with yourself to reflect, meditate or, more importantly, carry out the other morning rituals.

      So rising early can be seen as a foundation for all the other morning rituals. Many, like myself, find that they are more productive in the early hours of the day.

      Also, various studies have shown that there are many other benefits from waking up an hour or two earlier in the morning. Sleeping early and waking up early helps the body attune with the earth’s circadian rhythms thus, promoting more restorative sleep. Other curious results from such studies show, for instance, that early risers tend to be more optimistic and can anticipate and solve problems more efficiently than the norm.[2]

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      7. Listen to Uplifting Music

      Uplifting music can have a direct impact on our mood, especially in the morning. It charges us emotionally and tunes us into a more positive outlook of the day ahead.

      Most people wake up to music or listen to music as they commute to work. Very often, however, they tune in to a radio or randomly pick a playlist from their device. Being more selective and conscious of the music you listen to in the morning can have a great impact on your day and life in general.

      It’s funny how we try to choose music according to our mood. For example if you are feeling down or disappointed by something, you are more prone to listen to music that reflects that mood – for instance blues, sad songs or downtempo music. This has the effect of reinforcing that mood. What you need to do is the exact opposite and retune your mood by listening to music that beats to a different tune than that mood.

      Try to listen to more uplifting music in the morning even if, or especially if, your mood does not dictate so.

      More About Energetic Habits & Rituals

      Featured photo credit: Carli Jeen via unsplash.com

      Reference

      [1] Live Science: What Is Qi Gong
      [2] Harvard Business Review: Defend Your Research: The Early Bird Really Does Get the Worm

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