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10 Things Only People Who Used To Live In Villages Would Understand

10 Things Only People Who Used To Live In Villages Would Understand

Urbanization has been for years the main trend around the world. Most people who were born in villages rush into modern cities. Obviously, there exist great differences between village lifestyle and city lifestyle. It’s hard to say which one is better. Neither of them is above the other.

Living in a city often means higher salary, more opportunities, more commodity options, more education resources, better medical care, and so on. However, these things are gradually being available in villages nowadays. On the contrary, there are a lot of things only people who used to live in villages would understand. People that have never been to villages couldn’t get the real beauty of village lifestyle.

1. You take fresh air everyday

If you haven’t lived in villages, you could not image how fresh the air is. There’s no automobile exhaust, drainage ditches, smelly waste… While you almost have to wear a breathing mask to go out in city life, you take fresh air every day from dawn to dark by living in villages.

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2. You can live a peaceful and quiet life

The city is always busy and noisy. There are a lot of vehicles and people in the road. Noises come from everywhere: traffic noises, industrial noises, construction building noises, and noises from your neighbors and living area. However, in villages, you never need to worry about these noises. You could get deep sleep at night and enjoy a quiet stroll at daytime.

3. You eat fresh, green and clean vegetables

All food needs to be purchased from supermarket or local malls if you live in a city. To eat fresh vegetables, you have to get up early and rush into the market. However, the situation is totally different if you live in villages. You could grow various kinds of vegetables by yourself. You control the fertilizing and pesticide to make sure the vegetables are green and clean.

4. You spend less in villages

Undoubtedly, living costs in villages are much lower. The price of commodities is lower in villages than that of city lifestyle. That means to purchase the same quantity of a commodity, you spend less money in village lifestyle. Also, since there are less consumer options, you could make a big saving to keep your money stayed.

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5. You will never feel alone

Most people living in cities would have the same feeling: they’re surrounded by people only 10 meters away, but they feel alone. There’s little communication between neighbors, and friends may be tens of kilometers away. To kill loneliness, they watch movies online, play online games, go out for a short travel… However, while living in villages, you will never feel alone. Every morning you could say hi to your neighbors and you may live within only 20 feet away from your friends. You meet strangers everywhere in a city but the whole village is not strange to you at all.

6. You do more physical exercise

While there are a lot of traffic tools that could save physical exercise in cities, life in villages can be very physical. Every activity in village life requires physical exercise, like working with the land, sowing seeds into the land, chopping and collecting wood for the winter, walking along old path, or going to a nearby shop. It is said that a thirty minutes active walk will tone your system for the next 4 hours, while village life produces more opportunities for you to do more than a thirty-minute active walk.

7. You can embrace a beautiful night sky

With the industrial pollution, what you can see in city nights are only sparking lights from various houses, traffic lights, vehicle lights and street lamps, but not stars and moon on the sky. However, in village area, you could embrace a clean and beautiful night sky with thousands of stars twinkling. In a moonlit night, you could see far away from your house roof and everything is so clear and clean in your eyes.

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8. You’re not obsessed with trends

When you’re living in a city, you need to check whether your clothes are fashionable or not before you go out as others might laugh at you for being out of fashion. You might be easily driven by hot topics like stocks, gossips, Hollywood movies or stars, cars… even though you don’t like these things. But you would never get driven to these by your village friend circles. You could live as simple and freely as you like.

9. You don’t have to worry about parking

If you have a car, you will know how difficult it is to find a paid parking spot in crowded cities, not even to say a free parking spot! However, if you used to live in villages, you will know how easy it is to find a free and easy parking space. There’s no traffic police who writes a ticket and then mails it to you in villages for a roadside parking. There’s no traffic light and no traffic jam.

10. You are safer in villages

The huge pressure of city life makes a lot of people corrupted. There are lots of crimes in the city. Many thefts and murders often take place in the city. Meanwhile, there are much more vehicles in city, which results in frequent traffic accidents. While in villages, few traffic accidents happen. Another element that brings danger to you is epidemic disease, most of which extend from one city to another city. People living in cities are more vulnerable to many diseases because of the sedentary lifestyle and fast food intake. These things become less possible in villages.

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What other things do you think that are only understood by people who used to live in villages? Share with us below.

Featured photo credit: Country/paraflyer via imcreator.com

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Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

We all have them—those hurtful, frustrating, offensive, manipulative people in our lives. No matter how hard we try to surround ourselves with positive and kind people, there will always be those who will disrespect, insult, berate, and misuse you if we allow them to.

We may, for a variety of reasons, not be able to avoid them, but we can determine how we interact with them and how we allow them to interact with us.

So, how to take control of your life and stop being pushed around?

Learning to set clear firm boundaries with the people in our lives at work and in our personal lives is the best way to protect ourselves from the negative effects of this kind of behavior.

What Boundaries Are (And What They’re Not)

Boundaries are limits

—they are not threats or ultimatums. Boundaries inform or teach. They are not a form of punishment.

Boundaries are firm lines—determined by you—which cannot be crossed by those around you. They are guidelines for how you will allow others to treat you and what kind of behaviors you will expect.

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Healthy personal boundaries help protect you from physical or emotional pain. You may also need to set firm boundaries at work to ensure you and your time are not disrespected. Don’t allow others to take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

Clear boundaries communicate to others that you demand respect and consideration—that you are willing to stand up for yourself and that you will not be a doormat for anyone. They are a “no trespassing” sign that makes it very clear when a line has been crossed and that there will be consequences for doing so.

Boundaries are not set with the intention of changing other people. They may change how people interact with you, but they are more about enforcing your needs than attempting to change the general behavior and attitude of others.

How to Establish Boundaries and Take Control of Your Life

Here are some ways that you can establish boundaries and take control of your life.

1. Self-Awareness Comes First

Before you can establish boundaries with others, you first need to understand what your needs are.

You are entitled to respect. You have the right to protect yourself from inappropriate or offensive behavior. Setting boundaries is a way of honoring your needs.

To set appropriate boundaries, you need to be clear about what healthy behaviors look like—what healthy relationships look like.

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You first have to become more aware of your feelings and honest with yourself about your expectations and what you feel is appropriate behavior:

  • Where do you need to establish better boundaries?
  • When do you feel disrespected?
  • When do you feel violated, frustrated, or angered by the behavior of others?
  • In what situations do you feel you are being mistreated or taken advantage of?
  • When do you want to be alone?
  • How much space do you need?

You need to honor your own needs and boundaries before you can expect others to honor them. This allows you to take control of your life.

2. Clear Communication Is Essential

Inform others clearly and directly what your expectations are. It is essential to have clear communication if you want others to respect your boundaries. Explain in an honest and respectful tone what you find offensive or unacceptable.

Many people simply aren’t aware that they are behaving inappropriately. They may never have been taught proper manners or consideration for others.

3. Be Specific but Don’t Blame

Taking a blaming or punishing attitude automatically puts people on the defensive. People will not listen when they feel attacked. It’s part of human nature.

That said, you do not need to overexplain or defend yourself. Boundaries are not open to compromise.

Sample language:

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  • “You may not…yell or raise your voice to me…”
  • “I need…to be treated with respect…”
  • “It’s not okay when…you take things from my desk without asking…”
  • “I won’t…do your work…cover for you anymore…”
  • “It’s not acceptable when…you ridicule or insult me…”
  • “I am uncomfortable when…you use offensive language”
  • “I will no longer be able to…lend you money…”

Being able to communicate these without sounding accusatory is essential if you want others to respect your boundaries so you can take control of your life.

4. Consequences Are Often Necessary

Determine what the appropriate consequences will be when boundaries are crossed. If it’s appropriate, be clear about those consequences upfront when communicating those boundaries to others.

Follow through. People won’t respect your boundaries if you don’t enforce them.

Standing our ground and forcing consequences doesn’t come easily to us. We want to be nice. We want people to like us, but we shouldn’t have to trade our self-respect to gain friends or to achieve success.

We may be tempted to let minor disrespect slide to avoid conflict, but as the familiar saying goes, “if you give people an inch, they’ll take a mile.”

It’s much easier to address offensive or inappropriate behavior now than to wait until that behavior has gotten completely out of hand.

It’s also important to remember that positive reinforcement is even more powerful than negative consequences. When people do alter the way they treat you, acknowledge it. Let people know that you notice and appreciate their efforts.

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Final Thoughts

Respect is always a valid reason for setting a boundary. Don’t defend yourself or your needs. Boundaries are often necessary to protect your time, your space, and your feelings. And these are essential if you want to take control of your life.

Start with the easiest boundaries first. Setting boundaries is a skill that needs to be practiced. Enlist support from others if necessary. Inform people immediately when they have crossed the line.

Don’t wait. Communicate politely and directly. Be clear about the consequences and follow them through.

The better you become at setting your own boundaries, the better you become at recognizing and respecting the boundaries of others.

Remember that establishing boundaries is your right. You are entitled to respect. You can’t control how other people behave, but you do have control over the way you allow people to treat you.

Learning to set boundaries is not always easy, but with time, it will become more comfortable. You may eventually find that boundaries become automatic and you no longer need to consciously set them.

They will simply become a natural extension of your self-respect.

Featured photo credit: Thomas Kelley via unsplash.com

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