Advertising
Advertising

10 Common Mistakes Every Parent Has Made At Least Once

10 Common Mistakes Every Parent Has Made At Least Once

There’s no such thing as a 100% perfect parent – everybody makes mistakes. Maybe you are about to have a child, or you already have one but are still keen to improve your parenting skills. Well, remember, mistakes happen and it does not mean that you are a bad parent.

Learn from these 10 common mistakes every parent has made, and make use of our helpful tips on what to do so you can minimize making these parenting mistakes yourself.

Mistake #1: Getting overly stressed out when your baby is crying

baby-215303_1280

    Most parents associate crying with the thought that they are doing something wrong and need to fix it asap. But most of the time that is just not true. Babies can be perfectly diapered and fed and still cry because that’s the way babies communicate. It doesn’t mean you are doing something wrong.

    What should you do instead?

    Be calm. For the most part, crying is just part of being a baby. But if your infant is inconsolable for a long time, or has fever, a rash, a swollen belly or is vomiting, then you need to call your pediatrician to see if everything is okay.

    Mistake #2: Waking your baby from sleep, just to breastfeed him or her

    baby-21167_1280

      Some parents think that one breastfeed is not enough to get an infant through the night. However, breastfed babies can – and should – sleep through the night. There are no studies that show that babies will starve unless they are fed in the middle of the night!

      What should you do instead?

      Advertising

      Let the baby sleep anyway. Both you and the baby will benefit from some extra sleep.

      Mistake #3: Thinking that a fever in a newborn is nothing serious and will go away by itself

      thermometer-106380_1280

        Any fever over 100.4 Celsius rectally in the first three months of a baby’s life is an emergency. The one exception is a fever that develops within 24 hours after an infant’s first set of immunizations. Some parents may just say the baby ‘feels warm’ and give them Tylenol. But that’s a parenting mistake in this age group. An infant’s immune system is not set up to handle an infection on its own.

        What should you do instead?

        If your child feels warm, take their temperature. If the temperature is above 100.4C, it is something serious, so call your pediatrician immediately.

        Mistake #4: Not properly installing the baby car seat

        sleeping-85321_1280

          Many parents, especially new parents, don’t really know how to install a baby seat properly. They might think that they have done it correctly, but many times that’s not the case. This simple mistake can cost lives. Do not be the parent that makes this fatal mistake.

          What you should do instead?

          Your infant’s life depend on it, so check with the store that you have installed the baby car seat properly.

          Advertising

          Mistake #5: Neglecting your children’s oral care

          boy-286152_1280

            We all know how important oral care is for humans. But we often underestimate the importance of oral care for our children. We may think that since they are very young, they are still clean and less likely to get tooth and gum diseases. However, this is not the case.

            What should you do instead?

            Your baby is never too young for you to start encouraging good oral health habits. Use wet gauze to wipe down your baby’s gums. Start using a toothbrush when the baby turns one.

            Mistake #6: Rushing your kids through childhood

            teenager-422197_1280

              Raising small children can be hard, monotonous work. At times it’s so physically and emotionally exhausting we wish they were older to make our life easier. Many parents make a mistake by rushing their children through childhood.

              What should you do instead?

              Let your child enjoy the wonder of childhood. Childhood is a time for free play and discovery. When we rush children through it, we rob them of an innocent age that they’ll never pass through again.

              Mistake #7: Teaching your kids unhealthy competition, simply because you are highly competitive

              Advertising

              swimming-50283

                Every parent has a competitive streak. However, sometimes it simply goes too far. For example, if your kid loses in a swimming competition and you get angry because you think he’s not as good as his friend … Well, don’t be!

                Children need to work hard and understand that dreams don’t come on a silver platter; they have to sweat and fight for them. But when we instill a “win at all costs” attitude, permitting them to throw anyone under the bus to get ahead, we lose sight of the importance of character. Character may not seem important in adolescence, but in adulthood it’s everything.

                What should you do instead?

                Teach your kids to be competitive while being respectful to the other competitors. Ask them to congratulate the winner when they lose. Teach them the meaning of healthy competition.

                Mistake #8: Forgetting that your actions speak louder than words

                son-388523_1280

                  You may think that you have taught a lot of life lessons to your children, but did you know that your children learn more from your actions than your words? If you want your children to be wonderful, you need to aim for wonderful in yourself, too. You need to be the person you hope they will be. Are you telling them to keep their room clean while your own room is a mess? Make sure that your actions are good examples for them.

                  What should you do instead?

                  Talk is cheap, action is valuable. Don’t just talk them about something, show them how it should be done.

                  Mistake #9: Raising the child we want, not the child we have

                  Advertising

                  people-316506_1280

                    As parents we harbor dreams for our children. They start when we get pregnant, before the gender’s even known. Every parent wants their children to be the best that they can be. But the irony of parenting is that children turn our molds upside down. They come out wired in ways we never anticipated.

                    What should you do instead?

                    Our job is to figure out their natural talents and train them in that direction. Forcing our dreams on them won’t work. Only when we see them for who they are can we impact their life powerfully.

                    Mistake #10: Believing our child is perfect

                    girl-388653_1280

                      One thing I often hear from professionals who work with children, such as counselors and teachers, is that parents today don’t want to hear anything negative about their child. When concerns are raised, even concerns voiced out of love, the knee-jerk reaction is often to attack the messenger.

                      What  should you do instead?

                      The truth can hurt, but when we listen with an open heart and mind we stand to benefit. We can intervene early before a situation gets out of hand. It’s easier to deal with a troubled child than repair a broken adult.

                      So, which parenting mistake can you relate most? Tell me in the comments section below.

                      More by this author

                      10 Clear Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Care What Others Think Use This Little Known Tool to Lose Weight Starting Now Steve Jobs’s 10 Principles to Success That Everyone Needs To Learn Seven Things That Mark Cuban Said That Made Me Work Harder Than Ever 10 Common Mistakes Every Parent Has Made At Least Once

                      Trending in Family

                      1 What Happened to Family Dinners? Why We Should Bring Them Back 2 How to Cope with Empty Nest Syndrome and Stop Feeling Lonely 3 How Not to Let Work Take Priority over Spending Time With Family 4 35 Life Hacks for Kids That Make Parenting Easier And More Fun 5 20 Things to Remember If You Love a Person with ADD

                      Read Next

                      Advertising
                      Advertising
                      Advertising

                      Last Updated on September 16, 2019

                      How to Stop Procrastinating: 11 Practical Ways for Procrastinators

                      How to Stop Procrastinating: 11 Practical Ways for Procrastinators

                      You have a deadline looming. However, instead of doing your work, you are fiddling with miscellaneous things like checking email, social media, watching videos, surfing blogs and forums. You know you should be working, but you just don’t feel like doing anything.

                      We are all familiar with the procrastination phenomenon. When we procrastinate, we squander away our free time and put off important tasks we should be doing them till it’s too late. And when it is indeed too late, we panic and wish we got started earlier.

                      The chronic procrastinators I know have spent years of their life looped in this cycle. Delaying, putting off things, slacking, hiding from work, facing work only when it’s unavoidable, then repeating this loop all over again. It’s a bad habit that eats us away and prevents us from achieving greater results in life.

                      Don’t let procrastination take over your life. Here, I will share my personal steps on how to stop procrastinating. These 11 steps will definitely apply to you too:

                      1. Break Your Work into Little Steps

                      Part of the reason why we procrastinate is because subconsciously, we find the work too overwhelming for us. Break it down into little parts, then focus on one part at the time. If you still procrastinate on the task after breaking it down, then break it down even further. Soon, your task will be so simple that you will be thinking “gee, this is so simple that I might as well just do it now!”.

                      For example, I’m currently writing a new book (on How to achieve anything in life). Book writing at its full scale is an enormous project and can be overwhelming. However, when I break it down into phases such as –

                      Advertising

                      • (1) Research
                      • (2) Deciding the topic
                      • (3) Creating the outline
                      • (4) Drafting the content
                      • (5) Writing Chapters #1 to #10,
                      • (6) Revision
                      • (7) etc.

                      Suddenly it seems very manageable. What I do then is to focus on the immediate phase and get it done to my best ability, without thinking about the other phases. When it’s done, I move on to the next.

                      2. Change Your Environment

                      Different environments have different impact on our productivity. Look at your work desk and your room. Do they make you want to work or do they make you want to snuggle and sleep? If it’s the latter, you should look into changing your workspace.

                      One thing to note is that an environment that makes us feel inspired before may lose its effect after a period of time. If that’s the case, then it’s time to change things around. Refer to Steps #2 and #3 of 13 Strategies To Jumpstart Your Productivity, which talks about revamping your environment and workspace.

                      3. Create a Detailed Timeline with Specific Deadlines

                      Having just 1 deadline for your work is like an invitation to procrastinate. That’s because we get the impression that we have time and keep pushing everything back, until it’s too late.

                      Break down your project (see tip #1), then create an overall timeline with specific deadlines for each small task. This way, you know you have to finish each task by a certain date. Your timelines must be robust, too – i.e. if you don’t finish this by today, it’s going to jeopardize everything else you have planned after that. This way it creates the urgency to act.

                      My goals are broken down into monthly, weekly, right down to the daily task lists, and the list is a call to action that I must accomplish this by the specified date, else my goals will be put off.

                      Advertising

                      Here’re more tips on setting deadlines: 22 Tips for Effective Deadlines

                      4. Eliminate Your Procrastination Pit-Stops

                      If you are procrastinating a little too much, maybe that’s because you make it easy to procrastinate.

                      Identify your browser bookmarks that take up a lot of your time and shift them into a separate folder that is less accessible. Disable the automatic notification option in your email client. Get rid of the distractions around you.

                      I know some people will out of the way and delete or deactivate their facebook accounts. I think it’s a little drastic and extreme as addressing procrastination is more about being conscious of our actions than counteracting via self-binding methods, but if you feel that’s what’s needed, go for it.

                      5. Hang out with People Who Inspire You to Take Action

                      I’m pretty sure if you spend just 10 minutes talking to Steve Jobs or Bill Gates, you’ll be more inspired to act than if you spent the 10 minutes doing nothing. The people we are with influence our behaviors. Of course spending time with Steve Jobs or Bill Gates every day is probably not a feasible method, but the principle applies — The Hidden Power of Every Single Person Around You

                      Identify the people, friends or colleagues who trigger you – most likely the go-getters and hard workers – and hang out with them more often. Soon you will inculcate their drive and spirit too.

                      Advertising

                      As a personal development blogger, I “hang out” with inspiring personal development experts by reading their blogs and corresponding with them regularly via email and social media. It’s communication via new media and it works all the same.

                      6. Get a Buddy

                      Having a companion makes the whole process much more fun. Ideally, your buddy should be someone who has his/her own set of goals. Both of you will hold each other accountable to your goals and plans. While it’s not necessary for both of you to have the same goals, it’ll be even better if that’s the case, so you can learn from each other.

                      I have a good friend whom I talk to regularly, and we always ask each other about our goals and progress in achieving those goals. Needless to say, it spurs us to keep taking action.

                      7. Tell Others About Your Goals

                      This serves the same function as #6, on a larger scale. Tell all your friends, colleagues, acquaintances and family about your projects. Now whenever you see them, they are bound to ask you about your status on those projects.

                      For example, sometimes I announce my projects on The Personal Excellence Blog, Twitter and Facebook, and my readers will ask me about them on an ongoing basis. It’s a great way to keep myself accountable to my plans.

                      8. Seek out Someone Who Has Already Achieved the Outcome

                      What is it you want to accomplish here, and who are the people who have accomplished this already? Go seek them out and connect with them. Seeing living proof that your goals are very well achievable if you take action is one of the best triggers for action.

                      Advertising

                      9. Re-Clarify Your Goals

                      If you have been procrastinating for an extended period of time, it might reflect a misalignment between what you want and what you are currently doing. Often times, we outgrow our goals as we discover more about ourselves, but we don’t change our goals to reflect that.

                      Get away from your work (a short vacation will be good, else just a weekend break or staycation will do too) and take some time to regroup yourself. What exactly do you want to achieve? What should you do to get there? What are the steps to take? Does your current work align with that? If not, what can you do about it?

                      10. Stop Over-Complicating Things

                      Are you waiting for a perfect time to do this? That maybe now is not the best time because of X, Y, Z reasons? Ditch that thought because there’s never a perfect time. If you keep waiting for one, you are never going to accomplish anything.

                      Perfectionism is one of the biggest reasons for procrastination. Read more about why perfectionist tendencies can be a bane than a boon: Why Being A Perfectionist May Not Be So Perfect.

                      11. Get a Grip and Just Do It

                      At the end, it boils down to taking action. You can do all the strategizing, planning and hypothesizing, but if you don’t take action, nothing’s going to happen. Occasionally, I get readers and clients who keep complaining about their situations but they still refuse to take action at the end of the day.

                      Reality check:

                      I have never heard anyone procrastinate their way to success before and I doubt it’s going to change in the near future.  Whatever it is you are procrastinating on, if you want to get it done, you need to get a grip on yourself and do it.

                      More About Procrastination

                      Featured photo credit: Malvestida Magazine via unsplash.com

                      Read Next