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10 Common Mistakes Every Parent Has Made At Least Once

10 Common Mistakes Every Parent Has Made At Least Once

There’s no such thing as a 100% perfect parent – everybody makes mistakes. Maybe you are about to have a child, or you already have one but are still keen to improve your parenting skills. Well, remember, mistakes happen and it does not mean that you are a bad parent.

Learn from these 10 common mistakes every parent has made, and make use of our helpful tips on what to do so you can minimize making these parenting mistakes yourself.

Mistake #1: Getting overly stressed out when your baby is crying

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    Most parents associate crying with the thought that they are doing something wrong and need to fix it asap. But most of the time that is just not true. Babies can be perfectly diapered and fed and still cry because that’s the way babies communicate. It doesn’t mean you are doing something wrong.

    What should you do instead?

    Be calm. For the most part, crying is just part of being a baby. But if your infant is inconsolable for a long time, or has fever, a rash, a swollen belly or is vomiting, then you need to call your pediatrician to see if everything is okay.

    Mistake #2: Waking your baby from sleep, just to breastfeed him or her

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      Some parents think that one breastfeed is not enough to get an infant through the night. However, breastfed babies can – and should – sleep through the night. There are no studies that show that babies will starve unless they are fed in the middle of the night!

      What should you do instead?

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      Let the baby sleep anyway. Both you and the baby will benefit from some extra sleep.

      Mistake #3: Thinking that a fever in a newborn is nothing serious and will go away by itself

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        Any fever over 100.4 Celsius rectally in the first three months of a baby’s life is an emergency. The one exception is a fever that develops within 24 hours after an infant’s first set of immunizations. Some parents may just say the baby ‘feels warm’ and give them Tylenol. But that’s a parenting mistake in this age group. An infant’s immune system is not set up to handle an infection on its own.

        What should you do instead?

        If your child feels warm, take their temperature. If the temperature is above 100.4C, it is something serious, so call your pediatrician immediately.

        Mistake #4: Not properly installing the baby car seat

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          Many parents, especially new parents, don’t really know how to install a baby seat properly. They might think that they have done it correctly, but many times that’s not the case. This simple mistake can cost lives. Do not be the parent that makes this fatal mistake.

          What you should do instead?

          Your infant’s life depend on it, so check with the store that you have installed the baby car seat properly.

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          Mistake #5: Neglecting your children’s oral care

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            We all know how important oral care is for humans. But we often underestimate the importance of oral care for our children. We may think that since they are very young, they are still clean and less likely to get tooth and gum diseases. However, this is not the case.

            What should you do instead?

            Your baby is never too young for you to start encouraging good oral health habits. Use wet gauze to wipe down your baby’s gums. Start using a toothbrush when the baby turns one.

            Mistake #6: Rushing your kids through childhood

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              Raising small children can be hard, monotonous work. At times it’s so physically and emotionally exhausting we wish they were older to make our life easier. Many parents make a mistake by rushing their children through childhood.

              What should you do instead?

              Let your child enjoy the wonder of childhood. Childhood is a time for free play and discovery. When we rush children through it, we rob them of an innocent age that they’ll never pass through again.

              Mistake #7: Teaching your kids unhealthy competition, simply because you are highly competitive

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                Every parent has a competitive streak. However, sometimes it simply goes too far. For example, if your kid loses in a swimming competition and you get angry because you think he’s not as good as his friend … Well, don’t be!

                Children need to work hard and understand that dreams don’t come on a silver platter; they have to sweat and fight for them. But when we instill a “win at all costs” attitude, permitting them to throw anyone under the bus to get ahead, we lose sight of the importance of character. Character may not seem important in adolescence, but in adulthood it’s everything.

                What should you do instead?

                Teach your kids to be competitive while being respectful to the other competitors. Ask them to congratulate the winner when they lose. Teach them the meaning of healthy competition.

                Mistake #8: Forgetting that your actions speak louder than words

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                  You may think that you have taught a lot of life lessons to your children, but did you know that your children learn more from your actions than your words? If you want your children to be wonderful, you need to aim for wonderful in yourself, too. You need to be the person you hope they will be. Are you telling them to keep their room clean while your own room is a mess? Make sure that your actions are good examples for them.

                  What should you do instead?

                  Talk is cheap, action is valuable. Don’t just talk them about something, show them how it should be done.

                  Mistake #9: Raising the child we want, not the child we have

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                    As parents we harbor dreams for our children. They start when we get pregnant, before the gender’s even known. Every parent wants their children to be the best that they can be. But the irony of parenting is that children turn our molds upside down. They come out wired in ways we never anticipated.

                    What should you do instead?

                    Our job is to figure out their natural talents and train them in that direction. Forcing our dreams on them won’t work. Only when we see them for who they are can we impact their life powerfully.

                    Mistake #10: Believing our child is perfect

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                      One thing I often hear from professionals who work with children, such as counselors and teachers, is that parents today don’t want to hear anything negative about their child. When concerns are raised, even concerns voiced out of love, the knee-jerk reaction is often to attack the messenger.

                      What  should you do instead?

                      The truth can hurt, but when we listen with an open heart and mind we stand to benefit. We can intervene early before a situation gets out of hand. It’s easier to deal with a troubled child than repair a broken adult.

                      So, which parenting mistake can you relate most? Tell me in the comments section below.

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                      Last Updated on January 17, 2019

                      8 Simple Mindfulness Exercises to Bring Peace and Happiness to Your Life

                      8 Simple Mindfulness Exercises to Bring Peace and Happiness to Your Life

                      In life, we all need to be conscientious of what we are doing. You don’t need to live a life of stress if you don’t want to. You can achieve peace and happiness in life by carefully building mindfulness exercises into your life’s routine.

                      Exercising mindfulness isn’t rocket science and as importantly, you can do it. It will, however, take a few tries to get into the groove of things but once you get it, it is like riding a bike, you will never lose it.

                      Trust me. It’s in your best interest to learn and put these mindfulness exercises into practice. In this article, I will share with you 8 mindfulness exercises that will help you to boost your energy, vitality and live a more peaceful and happier life.

                      Why Is It Hard to Live A Peaceful And Happy Life?

                      Our Habitat Has Become Too Technological

                      The world has accepted the idea that technology is often the cure for all evil. We have accepted, as a society, that everything technological will make us live a better life without fully investigating the many side effects that modernity brings.

                      There are a number of technological side effects that have a tremendous impact on your life that the media rarely tells you about.[1] Some of them include self-harm, economic inequality, having less sex, and even suicide. The global community is becoming less happy because of technology.

                      How can anybody live a peaceful and happy life when they are depressed? Technology advancements, ladies and gents, is a major reason for why we are living a poor life because it has infiltrated our lives too much.

                      According to my research, Americans spend an average of 8 hours a day looking at the computer screen — The average screen time spent on smartphones alone is about 20 hours per week. That’s a lot! No wonder why living a happy and peaceful life is so difficult these days.

                      Too Many People Don’t Want to Unplug

                      Americans check their phones an average of 80 times during vacation.[2] Some admit to checking their smartphones 300 times every single day. In countries like Brazil, India and China, the situation is no different.

                      The reality is that people are constantly plugged into technological devices and this behavior is literally making people all over the globe fight an inner war with themselves, which consequently makes them very sad. As we know, war is the enemy of peace which won’t make anybody happy.

                      Listen carefully:

                      We have a global anxiety epidemic because people don’t want to unplug from their smartphones and most people aren’t doing anything to fix it. It is a sad state of affairs but very real. This obsession with technology is turning us into perishable robots who live terrible lives.

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                      The era of anxiety is here to stay. There is little doubt about it. We can, however, fight back with the best remedy of all — We call it mindfulness!

                      Thank God there is an antidote to this whole technological madness. Without further ado, let’s go straight to the mindful exercises.

                      8 Mindfulness Exercises to Start Practicing

                      There are tons of mindfulness exercises available for you to engage with out there.[3] In the paragraphs below, I will include the best ones I’ve personally tried or have seen my close friends and family members try.

                      Are you ready for it? Let’s go!

                      1. Pray Daily

                      You should pray on a daily basis. Why is that you may ask — Well, because science has told us to do so.

                      When people pray, they feel peaceful, almost eliminating anxiety. Worries become secondary, and often gives people energy and hope to cope with the difficulties of life.

                      Prayer can make you more confident and focused. Prayer also helps you with self-control, helps to control pain, and can protect you against illnesses and disorders like cancer and high blood pressure. At least, this is what researchers from Harvard Medical School have said.[4]

                      Pray. You won’t regret it.[5]

                      2. Pay Attention to Your Inner Thoughts

                      A lot of people allow themselves to be influenced by their negative thoughts. Be different and resist believing in them. It is a bad habit that can lead to unhappiness.

                      By the way, if you do feel this way, chances are high that somebody other than you put these thoughts into your head.

                      Here is my secret to combat this cancer — look at things objectively. I bet that if you look at things as they are, you will realize that most if not all of your negative thoughts are only inside of your head.

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                      If you pay close attention, you will quickly realize that these voices aren’t worth your time. Believe me — Ignoring them and looking at things with objectivity is often the best course of action.

                      This article can guide you to beat negative thoughts:

                      How to Stop Automatic Negative Thoughts When You’re Overwhelmed

                      3. Smile Often

                      Smiling will slow down your heart. It will also relax your body because when you smile, your body releases endorphins which in itself has a number of positive benefits for you as a person.

                      Smile often! You may want to smile early in the morning, during the day, and late in the evening. It is amazing what happens to you when you decide to smile instead of being grumpy.

                      Surrender your problems to a nice smile. You will notice two things. First, most people just don’t which makes them live a miserable life. Second, if you decide to smile often, you will eventually smile unconsciously which is the ideal.

                      The moment that you smile unconsciously, you then know that you are truly happy.

                      4. Organize Your Working Desk

                      A messy desk will make you less productive and can agitate and overstimulate you. You don’t want that.

                      When you clear your desk, you engage in deep inner-thinking and your systematic decision making ends up becoming therapeutic.

                      Most people realize that they are most creative when their creative space is clean and organized. The former often makes people more aware of what they are doing which lends to less stress and more productivity.

                      Organizing your desk will also make you more energetic and focused because order often decreases chaos which is a condition that often slows down daily progress.

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                      5. Celebrate Your Friend’s Victories

                      I love this mindful exercise. One of the best ways to live a happy and peaceful life is to celebrate the victories of others. When you do that, you automatically make your friends in a better mood which makes you in a better mood, as well.

                      Happiness is contagious! We might as well celebrate others as much as we can. If you find out that your peer has won an award, celebrate with him! If your friend is the recipient of a local charity award, celebrate with her!

                      What is also awesome is that when you celebrate with others, they often celebrate with you in return. This, ladies and gentleman, will make you feel fantastic. You can’t go wrong with this one, period.

                      6. Listen to Your Spouse/Partner

                      God put someone in your life for a reason. You might as well listen to him or her.

                      I listen to my wife everyday. In fact, I often ask the following question to her, “Amanda, what are your thoughts about…” or “What am I missing about…” It is shocking what I hear back from her. Without her having much context and perspective, by the art of observation in my own nonverbal behavior and the behavior of others, she accurately gives me incredible insights which helps me out with living my life to the fullest.

                      I’m a firm believer that spouses are supposed to engage in interpersonal communication every day. I most definitely do and will continue doing it. You should do the same.

                      7. Give Yourself a Break from Technology

                      You can’t be in total equilibrium if your computerized devices control your life. You must get away from technology on a daily basis.[6]

                      How do you do that? This is my formula:

                      First, take this smartphone control test. It is only ten questions but this test will place you somewhere in the human robot cycle continuum.

                      If your score is between 25-30, take a break from the computer (or smartphone, pad, laptop/desktop) every twenty minutes and stop being on a computerized device after 8:00pm.

                      If you score between 30-35, still take a break every 20 minutes but stop being on these devices at 5:00pm.

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                      If you score more than 35, you need to take action immediately.

                      Limit computer use as much as possible throughout the day. Give yourself as many breaks from the computer as possible. Are you ready for the challenge?

                      8. Go Exercise

                      Go exercise at least three times a week. I don’t care if you need to workout early in the morning, late in the evening, on the weekends or during work days. Working out is absolutely imperative for you to live happy and peaceful life.

                      The stresses of the modern world are too much for you to neglect this important mindfulness exercise. When you go to the gym, you burn calories, focus on activities one step at a time, your mind relaxes, anxiety decreases, you sweat and often think about topics unrelated to your work place among many other benefits.

                      You must exercise at least three hours each week for optimum results. Why? Just take a look at all the benefits of regular exercising:

                      12 Benefits of Regular Exercise You Should Know

                      The Bottom Line

                      It’s in your best interest to learn and put these mindfulness exercises into practice. Now that our habitat has become too technological and many people just don’t want to unplug, engaging in daily prayer, celebrate your friends’ victories, and listening to your spouse are among the best ways to be mindful about what you are doing and how you are living.

                      It is possible to live a happy and peaceful life. It only depends on you.

                      Go exercise! Take a break from technology and invest in you! Life is too short for distractions.

                      More Resources About Mindfulness

                      Featured photo credit: Lesly Juarez via unsplash.com

                      Reference

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