Advertising
Advertising

If You Can’t Stop Doing These 10 Things, You’re Not Ready To Get Married

If You Can’t Stop Doing These 10 Things, You’re Not Ready To Get Married

Tying the knot is a big decision, a life-changing one at that. Then why do we see some people so eager to lock it down as well as some people so afraid of marriage that they convince their friends and relatives to never ever to fall in this trap.

You must have met both the types at some point of your life or other. You may have faced the same dilemma yourself. Wondering whether this person is right for you. You love each other a lot. Nothing can go wrong. And you are gonna live happily ever after. But what if something goes wrong? What if you lose interest in each other after a few years? What will happen to our marriage?

There are no clear cut answers to those questions or definite rules according to which you can decide whether your partner is the right choice or not. But you can definitely decide a few things for yourself. If you can’t stop doing these 10 things, you’re not ready to get married.

1. You keep thinking about a future which you cannot see your partner in.

You want to become a billionaire, buy an island and travel the world but cannot speculate how your partner feels about it. You keep thinking about your own long term goals without showing much interest in his/her aims in life. These things matter a lot. If this is the case with you, you are probably more inclined to lead your life as a lone wolf.

Advertising

2. You cannot stand a single dispute or disagreement with your partner.

Instead of trying to work things out, you either tend to shut off or lose your calm and start having second thoughts about your choice. This clearly shows that you are emotionally not ready for any big fights that may come in the future after marriage. You don’t seem to understand the fact that relationships require patience and a lot of work.

mag2

    3. You have trust issues.

    It may be that you were neglected by your mom or dad, betrayed by your best friend or dumped by your ex. You don’t seem to trust anybody other than yourself and you don’t allow anyone to come near you emotionally. You feel guarded that way. You constantly fight the urge to check on your partner’s texts, calls or emails. If you fall in this category, you are definitely not ready to get hitched at the moment.

    4. You totally avoid meeting your partner’s friends and family members.

    You feel alienated and weird around them. If you don’t want to spend a minute more than necessary with your future in-laws, you probably don’t see them as your future in-laws.

    Advertising

    5. You constantly find ways to get your partner to change and cannot accept/love them for who they are.

    You feel that you do this to better your relationship. But you don’t realize that this will ultimately cause resentment on both sides. You cannot wait for him/her to get inspired to change for the better. You want to take all the matters in your hand. If this sounds familiar, you might want to think again before popping the question.

    mag5

      6. You just don’t like sharing.

      Period. Be it food, electricity bills, a new wardrobe, a few chairs, anything. It may be that you are not very confident about the whole idea of getting married, staying together, share your life, etc. You want a clear sense of who owns what.

      Advertising

      mag7

        7.  You are really jealous.

        It’s even cute sometimes (in limits). But if you are the person who can go to lengths to make your partner jealous despite the fact that it makes him or her very uneasy, you have huge fights with them because of this habit. If you crack jokes about breaking up or you wish to hook up with someone else, you are surely not marriage material.

        mag8

          8. You are indecisive.

          You cannot decide what to have for dinner. You are not so sure of your career choice. You have a hard time believing that someone would ask you about your opinion on something. If this is you, you need a lot of time to even start thinking about your marriage.

          9. You lie.

          Every time. When you are asked the reason of being late. When you are asked a simple question of whether you had your lunch or not. When you are asked to give your partner a lift from workplace. You make silly excuses for various stuff. You just cannot be honest. Maybe you have valid reasons for lying and cheating. But it’s not the way you want to spend your entire life, right?

          Advertising

          mag10

            10. You don’t want to deal with your issues and baggage.

            Probably you are too lazy to do so. But this will eventually catch up with you and you can never have a deep relationship with your partner till you clear things from your past up .

            mag11

              So, take your own time and decide what’s best for you.

              Featured photo credit: Emily Goodstein via flickr.com

              More by this author

              google 13 Interesting Facts About Google That You May Not Know An Amazing And Easy Way To Curl Your Hair With A T-Shirt She Made These Everyday Tools Totally Useless and It Will Make You Uncomfortable This Shoelace Hole Trick Will Help Protect Your Feet 10 Things Only People With Younger Siblings Would Understand

              Trending in Communication

              1 What Is Your Destiny in Life? How to Mindfully Achieve Your Purpose 2 7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck 3 10 Things You Can Do Now to Change Your Life Forever 4 Meditation Can Change Your Life: The Power of Mindfulness 5 Understand Your Love Style & Learn to Love: Co Dependent Relationship

              Read Next

              Advertising
              Advertising

              Last Updated on September 17, 2018

              7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

              7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

              Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.

              Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.

              When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).

              Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:

              1. You’re depressed about your home life.

              No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.

              However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.

              If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.

              Advertising

              When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.

              You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.

              2. You aren’t comfortable being yourself.

              Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.

              If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.

              You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.

              If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.

              3. You can’t stop snooping.

              Mutual trust is necessary in any relationship. The only way to get that trust is with respect.

              Advertising

              I can find you anywhere online, no matter how private and secure you think you are. The odds of you having a password I can’t crack are slim. If we’ve met in person, I could install a remote key logger on your device without even touching it.

              Finding your information online hardly takes a clandestine organization. Any idiot with a Wi-Fi-enabled device can cyberstalk you. I’m just the only idiot in the village admitting it.

              So now that we know everyone snoops, it’s time to address your personal habits. Governments snoop because they don’t trust us. If you’re snooping on your partner, it’s because you don’t trust them.

              It’s ok to have doubts, and it’s perfectly normal to look into anything that looks weird, but keep in mind that data collection is only half of an investigation.

              If you find yourself constantly snooping and questioning everything, clearly there’s a trust issue and the relationship likely needs to end.

              4. You’re afraid of commitment.

              If you’ve been dating longer than a year and you aren’t engaged, it’s never going to happen.

              Commitment is important. People will come up with a million ways to describe why they can’t be committed.

              Advertising

              No matter who you are if you like it, you need to put a ring on it. Find an engagement ring, stick a gemstone in it and marry the person. If you’re not legally able to get married or you don’t believe in it for one reason or another, have a child (or adopt one, however you’re able to) or treat your partner’s family like your own. It’s a huge financial and mental commitment.

              If you’re not ready for one or the other after some time, don’t waste anymore of your precious life on the relationship.

              Your relationship should be something that propels you forward. If it’s not going anywhere, make it an open relationship and call it what it is—dating multiple people.

              5. You imagine a happier life without your partner.

              If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.

              Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.

              Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.

              Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.

              Advertising

              If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?

              6. You resent, rather than love your partner.

              When a relationship starts to crumble, you begin to resent your partner for all the things you once loved about him or her.

              When you’ve reached this point, your partner has reached at least No. 2 on this list. From your partner’s perspective, your unhappiness with them is picked up as bashing them for being who they are.

              If you’re both unhappy in the relationship, it’s better if it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.

              7. You chase past feelings.

              It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.

              You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.

              When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.

              Final thoughts

              If you’re feeling stuck in your current relationship, it’s time to reflect about it with your partner. Don’t ignore these signs of an unhappy relationship as they will slowly go worse and harm both you and your partner in long-term.

              Featured photo credit: josh peterson via unsplash.com

              Read Next