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Why You Shouldn’t Waste Time On Forced Friendships

Why You Shouldn’t Waste Time On Forced Friendships

There are some people we just don’t get on with. Not because they are necessarily toxic or bad people, but because our interests and personalities simply aren’t compatible. We can often find ourselves attempting to force a friendship to occur out of kindness or to be polite, but most of the time it probably won’t work out. Here, Elite Daily argues that you shouldn’t feel guilty about that, and life is too short for those pointless endeavours:

Vibes: the energy your immediate surroundings give off. A concept people toss around, but don’t truly understand. Whether or not you will click with someone else is completely dependent upon the vibes you both are eliciting. When you try and connect with another person and he or she is not on the same wavelength as you, you will find that the vibes you both are giving off are opposite in nature. The conversation will not flow naturally; it will be as if you are pulling teeth — it’s forced.

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“I don’t know what it is but I don’t find myself vibing with a lot of people these days. I realized that I’ve slowly and subconsciously filtered people out of my life who bring nothing to it.

I no longer have the energy for meaningless friendships, forced interactions or unnecessary conversations. If we don’t vibrate on the same frequency there’s just no reason for us to waste our time. I’d rather have no one and wait for substance than to not feel someone and fake the funk.” – Joquesse Eugenia

This quote really puts life into perspective and shows just how powerful a person’s vibes can be. As you get older, you realize how valuable your time is and that you need to make the most of it. College and high school are parts of the past when you needed to “play nice” and to be friends with everyone in your surroundings. Now you’re an adult, living on your own, in a huge city filled with endless opportunities. You are no longer obligated to invite someone to tag along somewhere just because you have class together. You are free to make your own decisions without any pressure to include people you don’t want to associate with.

The time you spend in your twenties is mentally exhausting. You are at a point in which you are facing circumstances you never have before. You are finally self-sufficient and working towards your own income. You are reliant upon yourself and responsible for your own outcomes. If you are not happy with something that is going on in your life, it’s up to you and only you to make the necessary adjustments. If the company you keep is bringing you down or filling your life with anxiety, it’s time to make some adjustments. Don’t feel guilty for feeling this way — it is the natural progression of life.

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The people you used to hang out with usually do not fulfill the same roles now as they previously did. Maybe you don’t realize it, but chances are you are limiting your contact with these people without even knowing it. When you are exhausted and run down from your workday, you shouldn’t be reaching out to the people who will exacerbate any of your stress. Wouldn’t you rather just be alone and unwind from the day?

As lonely as this can seem, isn’t it in your best interest to be alone than with people who do not bring anything of value to your life? There’s no reason to hang out with a person just for the sake of being in the company of others. Wait to find the people or person you can just “hang” with — you know, the person, whom after you sat in complete and utter silence with, leaves you feeling that you had the most meaningful conversation of your life. Someone whose mere presence brings you comfort and ease. These are the types of people you should be spending your energy on, not the people you feel obligated to because of past history.

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When you lose touch with a friend, there usually isn’t one big incident that caused the separation. It’s just the fact that you are growing in two different directions and there really isn’t a need for that person anymore. When something huge happens in your life, you know you can still call this person, but when it comes to day-to-day life, he or she simply does not have a place anymore.

Life brings enough anxiety as it is; the people with whom you are choosing to surround yourself should not be part of it. Understanding the concept of vibes can help you determine whom to spend your time with as well. Some people cannot vibe the way others can, it’s just simply in their nature. The sooner you realize it, the more your mentality will improve. Embrace the good vibes and let go of the negative and see how much better your life will be.

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Life Is Too Short To Keep People Who Bring You Down Around | Elite Daily

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Last Updated on December 2, 2018

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

When giving a presentation or speech, you have to engage your audience effectively in order to truly get your point across. Unlike a written editorial or newsletter, your speech is fleeting; once you’ve said everything you set out to say, you don’t get a second chance to have your voice heard in that specific arena.

You need to make sure your audience hangs on to every word you say, from your introduction to your wrap-up. You can do so by:

1. Connecting them with each other

Picture your typical rock concert. What’s the first thing the singer says to the crowd after jumping out on stage? “Hello (insert city name here)!” Just acknowledging that he’s coherent enough to know where he is is enough for the audience to go wild and get into the show.

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It makes each individual feel as if they’re a part of something bigger. The same goes for any public speaking event. When an audience hears, “You’re all here because you care deeply about wildlife preservation,” it gives them a sense that they’re not just there to listen, but they’re there to connect with the like-minded people all around them.

2. Connect with their emotions

Speakers always try to get their audience emotionally involved in whatever topic they’re discussing. There are a variety of ways in which to do this, such as using statistics, stories, pictures or videos that really show the importance of the topic at hand.

For example, showing pictures of the aftermath of an accident related to drunk driving will certainly send a specific message to an audience of teenagers and young adults. While doing so might be emotionally nerve-racking to the crowd, it may be necessary to get your point across and engage them fully.

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3. Keep going back to the beginning

Revisit your theme throughout your presentation. Although you should give your audience the credit they deserve and know that they can follow along, linking back to your initial thesis can act as a subconscious reminder of why what you’re currently telling them is important.

On the other hand, if you simply mention your theme or the point of your speech at the beginning and never mention it again, it gives your audience the impression that it’s not really that important.

4. Link to your audience’s motivation

After you’ve acknowledged your audience’s common interests in being present, discuss their motivation for being there. Be specific. Using the previous example, if your audience clearly cares about wildlife preservation, discuss what can be done to help save endangered species’ from extinction.

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Don’t just give them cold, hard facts; use the facts to make a point that they can use to better themselves or the world in some way.

5. Entertain them

While not all speeches or presentations are meant to be entertaining in a comedic way, audiences will become thoroughly engaged in anecdotes that relate to the overall theme of the speech. We discussed appealing to emotions, and that’s exactly what a speaker sets out to do when he tells a story from his past or that of a well-known historical figure.

Speakers usually tell more than one story in order to show that the first one they told isn’t simply an anomaly, and that whatever outcome they’re attempting to prove will consistently reoccur, given certain circumstances.

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6. Appeal to loyalty

Just like the musician mentioning the town he’s playing in will get the audience ready to rock, speakers need to appeal to their audience’s loyalty to their country, company, product or cause. Show them how important it is that they’re present and listening to your speech by making your words hit home to each individual.

In doing so, the members of your audience will feel as if you’re speaking directly to them while you’re addressing the entire crowd.

7. Tell them the benefits of the presentation

Early on in your presentation, you should tell your audience exactly what they’ll learn, and exactly how they’ll learn it. Don’t expect them to listen if they don’t have clear-cut information to listen for. On the other hand, if they know what to listen for, they’ll be more apt to stay engaged throughout your entire presentation so they don’t miss anything.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm4.staticflickr.com

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