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Why You Should Take The Risk To Live Your Life

Why You Should Take The Risk To Live Your Life

As a coach, I’m constantly working on building my network while adding and exchanging value with other business professionals. On a recent week-long business trip to Chicago I was scheduled to meet Justin downtown at 4 PM Friday night but thought I would leave Chicago a day early, so at 6 PM on Thursday, I asked if we could meet that night instead. Although hesitant because he had to rearrange his schedule at the last minute, he agreed. Since we had never had a conversation before, I picked him up at his home in the suburbs at 9 PM and we headed to a bar to take the time to get to know one another professionally. Before leaving for Chicago I made a FB post that said “Hey I am traveling to Chi would love to meet up”, and proceeded to tag Justin along with dozens of other individuals I was connected with through social media.  It was during this conversation that I learned 4 things I wanted to share with you today.

The most important decisions in our lives are made in a split second regardless of the risk.

Each moment we have the ability to transform our personal, professional and financial lives as we bring up and work through the pain of the past.  As I’m sitting conversing with him over a taco salad and water, Justin is relentlessly nailing my pain points over, and over, and over. As he’s doing this I can feel my stomach turn and I start thinking about all kinds of things. While my physiology is changing, my body language also changes as I’m a very animated person and it’s so dramatic he actually notices. As an extremely confident person being put in a vulnerable position where questions need to be answered, decisions need to be made, and deeper relationships are formed, it can become incredibly uncomfortable.  And honestly this was one of the most uncomfortable/comfortable moments of my life.  While I was comfortable knowing a decision had to be made.  I was uncomfortable being confronted in a way that demanded clarity.  If I wanted the reward I had to be honest about what I wanted, be able to communicate that clearly and simultaneously make a decision that very moment. Personally I don’t think there’s anything more difficult, because as Tony Robbins says “It is in these moments of decision that our destiny is shaped.”

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Being brutally honest is essential to your growth.

While I didn’t anticipate the conversation getting extremely personal, it did and I had no option but to A) stay engaged and build a deeper relationship or B) walk away knowing that if it didn’t progress it was my fault because I refused to answer the difficult questions that Justin wanted/ was demanding answers to. Being two incredibly strong-willed and opinionated individuals and playing in the big business arena on a daily basis refusing to answer the questions wasn’t an option, although don’t get me wrong it was a struggle.  The old saying goes “You can’t make it to second base if you refuse to remove your feet from first.”

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Short-term pain means long-term pleasure. 

The headache you get from starting a new diet, the pain from just starting a new workout regimen, the anxiety from having to do something outside of your comfort zone, the fear of commitment, these short term bursts of negative emotions drive you to make the changes needed to create the results you desire. If you don’t have these moments of short term pain you will never really accomplish anything you ever want in life. In fact, you will never get what you desire out of life.

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Taking a risk with the potential of reaping the reward makes the risk worth taking.

Somehow in between not knowing anything about one another and taco salad we were able to form a great connection and break down the barriers that existed which led to a much more personal connection than I had previously had all week. The risk of not knowing if it’s going to work, when it’s going to work, and how it’s going to work is the risk all successful people make, all happily married people make, all incredibly fulfilled people make.  It isn’t a matter of wanting to or not wanting to but stepping up to the plate when the opportunity presents itself especially when you least expect it.

What I anticipated being a 2-hour exchange became a 5-hour conversation, and an incredible bond that words cannot describe was formed. My challenge to you is to go out of your comfort zone, meet people you’ve never met, have conversations you’ve never had, create experiences you’ve never experienced, and go do what you want to do to accomplish the things that you want to accomplish. Life is short, make it count!

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Last Updated on November 5, 2018

8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies

8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies

We’ve all got our enemies; people who take pleasure in causing us pain and misery. Sometimes, the development of an enemy is due to certain differences in your characters and events have led to that. Other times, some people end up hating you for apparently no reason at all.

Regardless of how you got this enemy, as opposed to the paradigm of fighting fire with fire, consider the following reasons and see why you should actually appreciate your enemies. This article will show you not only how to not be bothered by your enemies, but how to actually foster love for them.

Read on to learn the secret.

1. It’s a practical lesson in anger management

To be honest, your enemies are the best people to help you understand your sense of anger management. When it might be true that your enemies have a way of bringing out the worst in you as regards anger, it is also true that they can help you in your quest to have that anger managed. You can’t get truly angry at someone you love and it is only in that time when you get truly annoyed that you learn how to manage it.

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Anger management is more effective when it is in practice and not in theory

Your enemies are like the therapists who you need, but actually don’t want. Inasmuch as you might want to hate them, they provide you an opportunity to control the anger impulse that you have.

2. It’s an opportunity for healthy competition

You might not know it, but your enemies make for great rivals as they help harness the competitor in you (sometimes, you might not even know or bee conversant with this competitive side until you come across an adversary). You get the right motivation to compete and this can go a long way to spur you to victory.

However, while doing so, it is also essential that you remember not to become a worse version of yourself while competing. Working against an adversary is tricky, and you need to ensure that you don’t cause harm to yourself or your morals in the process. Healthy competition is all you need to get out of this.

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3. Their negative comments can help you make a breakthrough

It is true that your enemies never really have much good to say about you. However, in as much as they might be talking out of a place of hate, there might be some truth to what they’re saying.

To wit, whenever you hear something mean or nasty from an enemy, you might want to take a step back and evaluate yourself. There is a chance that what this enemy is saying is true and coming to face that fact is a major step in helping you to become a better person overall. This is another testament to the fact that enemies can be therapists in their own way.

4. Enemies can also be powerful allies

Loving your enemies can also mean making an effort to interact and make peace with them. In the end, if you are able to establish some common ground and patch things up, you’ll have succeeded in making another friend. And who doesn’t need friends?

This can also help you in working with people in the long run. You get to hone your inter-personal skills, and that can be a big plus to your ledger.

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5. It gives you the ability to realize positivity

In a multitude of negativity, a speck of positivity always seems to find its way through.

Sometimes, a knowledge of the fact that you have enemies will also help you to focus on the many positives and good things that are in your life. A lot of times, we neglect what really matters in life. This can be due to being overly concerned with the enemies we have.

However, it is also possible for this acknowledgement to spur you to take a step back and appreciate the goo things (and people who surround you).

6. There might just be a misunderstanding

Sometimes, the reason why you have an enemy might be something very innocuous. You might not have known the cause of this fractured relationship and your enemy will help complete the picture.

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Simply approaching them will help you to understand the reason for the fracture. This, in turn, can help you to work towards healing your relationship moving forward. Misunderstandings happen, and you need to be able to work around them.

7. You learn to appreciate love as well

A constant reminder of the fact that there are enemies will also help you not to take those who love you for granted. Love and hate are two opposing emotions and it is possible for one to momentarily overshadow the other.

However, while you’ll always have enemies, there will also always be people who love you. These people need to be appreciated for what they do for you. Never let the hate projected to you from your enemies take the place of that.

8. Do you really need the hate?

The truth is that enemies bring only toxic emotions and generate bad reactions from you. If you’re truly to live a prosperous life, you can’t really be carrying all this baggage around.

Hate is bad and you should try all you can to get rid of it. It is a well-known fact that nobody can get really far in life while carrying a lot of emotional baggage. Well, hate is the biggest form of emotional baggage there is.

Featured photo credit: rawpixel via unsplash.com

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