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7 Steps You Can Take To Develop Lifelong Motivation

7 Steps You Can Take To Develop Lifelong Motivation

Motivation is the key to empowering your life and helping you achieve your goals and desires. However, few people know how to tap into the full potential of motivation, and most only feel intense motivation for short periods of time or fail to act on their feelings. Learning how to develop lifelong motivation will greatly affect your quality of life and helps to keep you going through the hard times.

Identify What You Want and Why

The first step to developing lifelong motivation is to determine what you truly want and why you want it. You might want to be rich or simply want to find happiness in your life. Identifying what you really want takes time, this means taking time to reflect on yourself and spending time soul-searching. Once you find what you want, you must then find the reason behind this desire. Wanting something “just because” is not a strong enough foundation to build lifelong motivation; you must find your own reason as to why you want something.

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Once you find what you want and why, it is a good idea to write it down. This helps you remember, and it also materializes your thoughts which psychologically makes them real and achievable.

Be Bold

No one who has lifelong motivation plays it “safe” or stays within their comfort zones all the time. Being bold means knowing that you will have to do things you may find unpleasant or scary. As you expose yourself to these scenarios more often, you will become more tolerant of being outside of your comfort zone, which will allow you to attempt greater things.

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Develop a Plan to Get What You Want

One of the biggest factors to finding lifelong motivation is knowing how to achieve it. Once you develop a strategy or plan to achieve what you want, you can begin working towards your goal. A plan helps you visualize each step and this mental image motivates you to reach the end destination. As you complete each phase of your plan you will find yourself much more motivated and excited about the next upcoming challenges.

Take Action

All of this advice is useless if you don’t act upon it. Ideas and wishful thinking will spark short-term motivation, but if you don’t act upon these feelings then nothing will change and you will find yourself feeling unmotivated again. Once you find what you want and developed a plan to reach that goal, then immediately start taking action before you have a chance to second-guess yourself. All the thinking and planning should already be done, and all you have to do is start progressing towards your final goal.

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Never Be Afraid of Failure

Fear of failure is the number one killer for motivation. Instead of fearing failure, you should learn to embrace it. Once you understand that failure can be a good thing, you’ll be able to accept the fact that you don’t have to be perfect at everything you do. Many people fall into the trap of waiting for the perfect time or opportunity to avoid failing, but this often leads to inaction. Learn from your failures and understand that every successful person had to fail many times before finding what works for them.

Learn How to Get Through a Rough Time

If you are able to stay positive and dig yourself out of a bad position then you’ll develop a “never give up” mentality, which is an essential ingredient in developing lifelong motivation. Learning to get through a rough time must be experienced first-hand, but once you emerge from your bad predicament, you will feel victorious, and you’ll be able to apply this winning mentality into everything you do. Going through a rough time teaches us that everything will be OK and how to manage ourselves when things are not going the way we want them to.

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Evaluate and Reflect on Both Your Successes and Failures

To develop lifelong motivation, you must learn from both your successes and failures. This allows you to fast-track your success in the future and avoid making the same mistakes in future endeavors. Not only does this empower you because you know that you’ve learned something new, but it also reminds you that you did all of the steps above (and more) and you are able to change your course of life if you put your mind to it.

Motivation is an elusive feeling; it can come and go at a moment’s notice, but once you learn how to harness its power, you will greatly improve the quality of your life. For more motivation, here is an interesting speech by TED which talks about why people fail to achieve a great career and why we are afraid to try.

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Last Updated on April 14, 2021

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

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5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

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