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How To Have A Better Love Life In 9 Steps

How To Have A Better Love Life In 9 Steps

A better love life is within reach for anyone. It only takes desire and concerted effort to make headway. The following 9 steps will lead any person to have a love life they can treasure.

Step 1. Nurture your self-love.

As one gets older, no truer statement becomes more real for us than the words, “If you don’t love yourself, you will not have the love life you want.”

When there is a lack of self-love, there is also a shortage of self-respect and self-compassion. Absence of these fundamental feelings for oneself will create an environment where a person will tolerate mistreatment all too easily.

A person who has healthy self-love values his or her feelings and well-being. They require a certain amount of respect, kindness, and gratitude from their significant other.

Step 2. Know what you bring to the table.

This is permission to toot your own horn. Write down and own what is wonderful and amazing about you.

The more you know what you are worth, the more it becomes apparent to others. Developing a healthy sense of self-confidence will boost your love life to the next level because nothing is sexier than a self-assured person.

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Step 3. Clearly express your wants and needs.

Speak up and ask for what will make you happier and improve your love life.

Effectively communicating your wants and needs will speed up the process of advancing your love life to something that you adore.

As you nurture self-love and confidence, it will become easier to ask for what you want. Your darling will appreciate your honesty and forthrightness because it will be clear to them what they need to do to make you happy and feel loved.

Step 4. Make your physical body sexy to you.

What do you think is sexy? Perhaps it’s soft skin, toned muscles, plump booty, to a name a few.

Whatever it is that you think is sensual, do that for yourself. Wear perfume, put on pretty undergarments, workout and boost your sexy factor.

When a person feels sexy, it’s pretty dazzling to others too. When your better half sees how you take care of yourself, he or she will take notice and your love life can’t help but benefit.

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Step 5. Explore your body and know what turns you on.

Until our partners can read our minds, we need to speak up and steer them into what makes us feel loved. Some people are good at reading body language, some are not. Make it easier for your mate to satisfy you by telling him or her what turns you on.

A healthy love life includes a healthy sex life. Sex between two people who love each other is one way to express that love.

To feel connected, seen, and satisfied in this intimate way will do wonders to enrich your love life.

Step 6. Learn to listen.

From our lover describing what turns him or her on, to them talking about their day, listen intently.

When people feel heard — that is, when they have a sense that what they are saying is being understood and taken into consideration — they feel connected and respected.

These feelings create immense satisfaction; it’s like rainbows, unicorns, and chocolate all in one to them. Such emotions confirm that they have made the right choice in who to love.

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Speaking from personal experience, when my love makes me feel heard, I see him through rose colored glasses and my heart expands.

Step 7. Practice heart expansion with your loved one.

Heart expansion is acting in a way that makes your heart explode with love and goodness. Conversely, heart contraction is doing things that make you feel sad, angry, and unloved.

When you practice heart expansion with your partner, you do things for them that make them feel good, but also, it makes you feel great.

For example, your loved one has been working long hours all week so you decide to make a special dinner, draw them a bath, or provide space for them to have some quiet time. Whatever it is you do, it’s something that makes them feel loved and cared for. At the same time, this generosity expands your heart which makes you cherish your love life.

Step 8. Cultivate your friendship.

Your lover does not have to be your best friend, but he or she should be a good friend. A person whom you can easily talk to, hang out with, and of course, is loyal through and through.

This other aspect of your connection will contribute to the health and longevity of your relationship.

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The deeper the bond you have with your significant other, the greater the loving feelings you develop. This results into a more intimate experience in love making.

Step 9. Learn to love your partner’s imperfections.

There is a Japanese term and world view called wabi-sabi which translates to finding beauty in imperfection. It’s derived from Buddhist teachings where impermanence is accepted and understood as the way of life.

There is no faultless partner or perfect love life. There is only our good perception of our other half and the ideal love situation we desire. Therefore, as we look upon them, we need to see their imperfections as part of their beauty.

The more beauty we see in our spouse — that is, looking at him or her in their totality and truly seeing what makes them special — the more reasons we can find to love them.

With a wabi-sabi attitude towards our lover, we can create the love life we always dreamed of.

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Last Updated on December 2, 2018

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

When giving a presentation or speech, you have to engage your audience effectively in order to truly get your point across. Unlike a written editorial or newsletter, your speech is fleeting; once you’ve said everything you set out to say, you don’t get a second chance to have your voice heard in that specific arena.

You need to make sure your audience hangs on to every word you say, from your introduction to your wrap-up. You can do so by:

1. Connecting them with each other

Picture your typical rock concert. What’s the first thing the singer says to the crowd after jumping out on stage? “Hello (insert city name here)!” Just acknowledging that he’s coherent enough to know where he is is enough for the audience to go wild and get into the show.

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It makes each individual feel as if they’re a part of something bigger. The same goes for any public speaking event. When an audience hears, “You’re all here because you care deeply about wildlife preservation,” it gives them a sense that they’re not just there to listen, but they’re there to connect with the like-minded people all around them.

2. Connect with their emotions

Speakers always try to get their audience emotionally involved in whatever topic they’re discussing. There are a variety of ways in which to do this, such as using statistics, stories, pictures or videos that really show the importance of the topic at hand.

For example, showing pictures of the aftermath of an accident related to drunk driving will certainly send a specific message to an audience of teenagers and young adults. While doing so might be emotionally nerve-racking to the crowd, it may be necessary to get your point across and engage them fully.

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3. Keep going back to the beginning

Revisit your theme throughout your presentation. Although you should give your audience the credit they deserve and know that they can follow along, linking back to your initial thesis can act as a subconscious reminder of why what you’re currently telling them is important.

On the other hand, if you simply mention your theme or the point of your speech at the beginning and never mention it again, it gives your audience the impression that it’s not really that important.

4. Link to your audience’s motivation

After you’ve acknowledged your audience’s common interests in being present, discuss their motivation for being there. Be specific. Using the previous example, if your audience clearly cares about wildlife preservation, discuss what can be done to help save endangered species’ from extinction.

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Don’t just give them cold, hard facts; use the facts to make a point that they can use to better themselves or the world in some way.

5. Entertain them

While not all speeches or presentations are meant to be entertaining in a comedic way, audiences will become thoroughly engaged in anecdotes that relate to the overall theme of the speech. We discussed appealing to emotions, and that’s exactly what a speaker sets out to do when he tells a story from his past or that of a well-known historical figure.

Speakers usually tell more than one story in order to show that the first one they told isn’t simply an anomaly, and that whatever outcome they’re attempting to prove will consistently reoccur, given certain circumstances.

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6. Appeal to loyalty

Just like the musician mentioning the town he’s playing in will get the audience ready to rock, speakers need to appeal to their audience’s loyalty to their country, company, product or cause. Show them how important it is that they’re present and listening to your speech by making your words hit home to each individual.

In doing so, the members of your audience will feel as if you’re speaking directly to them while you’re addressing the entire crowd.

7. Tell them the benefits of the presentation

Early on in your presentation, you should tell your audience exactly what they’ll learn, and exactly how they’ll learn it. Don’t expect them to listen if they don’t have clear-cut information to listen for. On the other hand, if they know what to listen for, they’ll be more apt to stay engaged throughout your entire presentation so they don’t miss anything.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm4.staticflickr.com

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