Advertising

How to Effectively Tend to the Relationships in Your Life

Advertising
How to Effectively Tend to the Relationships in Your Life

We all have relationships with a number of people, including wives, husbands, parents, children, brothers and sisters. When you interact with so many different people and personalities, clashes are bound to occur. Every person has different ideologies, values, and beliefs. Maintaining healthy relationships takes work. Here are some helpful tips on how to tend to the various relationships in your life.

Give time.

The people with whom you are related to need your company very often. They might not show it, but they do crave time with you. Start today. Take some time to sit and talk with the people in your life. They will appreciate the time you take to nurture the relationship you have.

Listen patiently and speak less.

Many of us do not realize that one who listens well can speak well. Listen patiently to what those you care about are saying, rather than breaking in before they finish talking. Listening carefully helps you grasp their point of view more effectively and also gives the other person a sense that they are important to you. Listen without thinking about your response and you’ll truly hear what they are trying to tell you.

Consider other points of view.

One-sided thinking is extremely harmful in any relationship. It is essential to consider the other person’s point of view in any conversation or situation. Many times thinking from your perspective alone is not sufficient to yield the desired results. There could be other aspects associated with a situation. Always take into consideration the point of view of everyone involved.

Advertising

Learn when to let go.

There will be times where it will be beneficial for everyone involved to let go of certain issues. Everyone does not think in the same way. The expectation of bringing every issue to a resolution is futile. So just let go. Move on positively and leave it to time to decide the results.

Consider other people’s priorities.

You cannot clap with a single hand. If someone somewhere is keeping your priorities on top and moving on, then there will be a point in time where you need to give importance to their priorities and happiness. This is essential for a healthy relationship.

Be kind and show respect.

Show humility every day. Learn to be kind to everyone including those who are related to you. An arrogant attitude can never stand very long. A healthy relationship demands respect for the relation and even for all the individuals related.

Allow others space to make their own decisions.

Avoid interfering or poking your nose in each and every matter. Your support is needed but everyone needs their liberty and space. Let them go forward with their decisions, and be there for them whenever they need you.

Advertising

Let go of those who have gone.

Those who have gone have their own liberty to think for themselves. Let them go and allow yourself to move on develop and maintain healthy future relationships. Sticking to the past will not help you in long run.

Do what you say and say what you do.

Your actions and words must be synchronized. Say only what you can do and what you have already said must be done anyhow. Action and words in opposite directions develop a negative perception of your personality.

Give everyone a fair chance in your relationships.

You might not always completely understand the other person, and they might need time to build up trust for their own self in your mind. Give them a fair chance to place their ideas completely and precisely. This is very important as we do not realize that reality can be very different from our perceptions. Even we need time to understand and realize things in their true form.

Accept people just the way they are and not the way you want them to be.

Everyone cannot think  or act in the way we might want them to. It is better to accept them the way they are. If we cannot, then we are going to get ourselves in trouble. Instead of assuming their ideology is incorrect, improve your character in a way that inspires them to become like you.

Advertising

Try to interpret intentions in a positive way.

In certain situations, it could get difficult for you to understand the other person’s perspective clearly. You would feel they are wrong but somewhere at the roots, they care for you and want you to beware of any difficulty you could face ahead. Before reaching a conclusion, try to analyze the intentions of the person positively. Look for that positivity in their intentions and you will find your way.

Learn to ask for forgiveness and forgive others when needed.

Forgiveness is the most effective tool in any person’s life, and it is equally difficult to hold onto. In relationships, learn to forgive your partner or those you have relationships with. You’ll feel lighter and stronger. This quality will help you become humble and kind. Additionally, do not hesitate to ask for forgiveness when the situation arises. Everyone makes mistake. Put aside your ego and say, “I’m sorry.”

Reduce your expectations.

The day your expectations do not get fulfilled, you get angry and wild. Why? It is because you expected something and wished for its fulfillment? A truly healthy relationship means giving without asking for anything in return. You can call it the purest form of love; love for anyone with whom you are related to.

Start expressing your positive feelings more often.

If you love someone or care for them, then say it or find a means to express this emotion. Those you love might not know how much you value them; so express yourself effectively.

Advertising

Start practicing these steps today. Things will not change overnight. It is a process that needs patience to yield results. These points seem very simple, yet we many times forget and keep wondering what is missing from our relationships. So start contemplating on these points today. I’m sure things will change for you and the difference will be sweet.

Featured photo credit: beautiful little boy and girl hug/Katsiaryna Drobysheva via shutterstock.com

More by this author

How to Effectively Tend to the Relationships in Your Life 5 Steps That Will Squash Your Negative Thoughts Do You Make These Parenting Mistakes?

Trending in Communication

1 How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide) 2 Why Your Lover Doesn’t Want Your Advice, but Your Validation 3 How to Find Happiness in Your Everyday Life 4 5 Tips for Self-Care During the Holidays 5 15 Things You Don’t Need To Apologize For (Though You Think You Do)

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on January 5, 2022

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

Advertising
How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

Advertising

Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

Advertising

Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

Advertising

When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

Advertising

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go or motivated. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

Advertising

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next