Advertising
Advertising

Discover 15 Reasons Why An Argument Could Help Your Relationship

Discover 15 Reasons Why An Argument Could Help Your Relationship

Maybe you do not relish the thought of having an argument with your partner because you know that it can leave some nasty fallout. But is this really the case? Arguments can serve a useful purpose, so if you are ready for one, check out these 15 reasons first!

1. You’ll know what your partner really thinks

arguing11

    After an argument, you know what views your significant other has and this is going to help with total transparency. Nobody wants a partner whose dark or hidden side is a mystery. It will be therapeutic in helping each other to reveal your real selves.

    2. You’ll be able to clear the air

    arguing6

      You know when a storm is brewing. Dark clouds form and the air becomes rather heavy. You wish it would rain. After the storm, the air is fresher and cleaner. An argument is rather like that. It helps to clear up some issues which have been smouldering away. Now that you have discussed it passionately, it will be time to move on.

      3. You’ll be able to set standards for arguing

      Advertising

      arguing5

        People argue in different ways. Some people shout and get really angry. Others tend to sulk or try long silences which are not really effective. You really need to have an argument about arguing! In this way, you can set boundaries and agree that an argument is perfectly all right but you need to agree on the limits. You will both agree that expressing feelings is allowed so long as it does not degenerate into insults. You will also agree that there should be no name-calling.

        4. You’ll be reassured

        arguing8

          Strange as it may seem, an argument could be a sign that you are both deeply committed to each other. The other end of the spectrum is the partner who keeps his or head down knowing that it does not really matter. That is a sign of indifference.

          5. You’ll feel more respected

          arguing13

            This will be a reciprocal feeling. You will feel that your views are now clear and that your partner respects them. Arguments can be extremely toxic when there is no respect at all on either side. If these continue, they usually spell the end of the relationship.

            6. You’ll learn to accept other points of view

            Advertising

            loversquarrel

              One great thing about arguing is that you can agree to differ. You do not need to always be right. Too many arguments end up in a match where scoring points seems to take precedence over reaching a compromise or just recognizing that your views are different. This does not invalidate either of you as a person.

              7. You’ll know when is a good time

              arguing9

                Choosing the time and even the place you have an argument is important. It respects the fact that your partner may be too tired or that the presence for kids or friends make the argument an inappropriate and fruitless exercise.

                8. You’ll know that arguments can be constructive

                arguing10

                  Most people associate quarrels with being angry, destructive and abusive. This is certainly the fast track to a divorce. But one Indian survey has shown that 44% of couples interviewed felt that arguing constructively really did help them to have a less stressful relationship and was an important element in helping the relationship to last.

                  9. You’ll know which issues are likely to cause friction

                  Advertising

                  arguing4

                    It is always good to discuss things like parenting styles, finances, and eating habits so that countless quarrels do not take place. By doing this, you will be able to work out what works best and where you can compromise.

                    10. You’ll know how to stay on topic

                    arguing3

                      In order for arguments or disagreeing well to function, you will have to make sure that you stay on topic instead of going over old sores. If you find your partner doing this, it is a good idea to remind her or him of the rules you have established. Going off on tangents usually means you both get lost in the jungle.

                      11. You’ll learn more about yourselves

                      arguing1

                        When you have an argument, you might find yourself surprised that this has become an issue. This is a great way to turn the spotlight on yourself rather than your partner. You suddenly start to think about why this issue has become a fixation or obsession. This can be revealing and is another good reason why arguing can help a couple stay together.

                        12. You’ll both have better health

                        Advertising

                        arguing7

                          The health benefits to be derived from constructive arguments are well known. A research project carried out at the Institute for Social Research at the University of Michigan found that couples who did no bickering at all were subject to higher levels of the cortisol hormone. Too much of this hormone increases blood-sugar levels and blood pressure and reduces immunity.

                          13. You’ll be a role model for your kids

                          couples number6

                            How many of us remember the awful rows our parents had with recriminations, accusations, and insults flying around like angry missiles? They never learned to disagree without being disagreeable and unpleasant. It was not exactly a role model. But if you have learned lessons from that and have been able to have constructive arguments with your spouse, then you are providing a great role model for your kids. That unhappy chain has been broken.

                            14. You’ll treasure the gift of communication

                            arguing12

                              Relationships need communication to survive. Having an argument that is not a fight, but that provides a solution, will convince you of the great value of communication. Learning to listen and to communicate will be the best gift you can give each other. This is the main message in the excellent book by Susan Quilliam called Stop Arguing, Start Talking: The 10 Point Plan for Couples in Conflict.

                              15. You’ll forget about getting revenge

                              Quarrel between men and women

                                Having a friendly fight means that negative thoughts like getting revenge or denying your partner sex or affection will be reduced to a minimum. You are also less likely to start brooding and becoming moody and worst of all sullen and sulky. Now, before you have that argument with your partner, make sure she or he reads this post first!

                                Featured photo credit: Discussion/Lucian Lanteri via flickr.com

                                More by this author

                                Robert Locke

                                Author of Ziger the Tiger Stories, a health enthusiast specializing in relationships, life improvement and mental health.

                                10 Reasons Why People Are Unmotivated (And How to Be Motivated) 12 Secrets To a Super Productive Meeting You Should Know Work Smarter, Not Harder: 12 Smart Ways to Be More Productive What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It 10 Simple Morning Exercises That Will Make You Feel Great All Day

                                Trending in Communication

                                1 How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner 2 12 Surprising Benefits of Learning a New Language 3 5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships 4 How a Lack of Communication Can Cost Your Career 5 What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

                                Read Next

                                Advertising
                                Advertising
                                Advertising

                                Last Updated on October 17, 2019

                                How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

                                How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

                                You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

                                But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

                                Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

                                What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

                                Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

                                So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

                                Advertising

                                1. Recognize the Signs

                                If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

                                Some telltale signs include:

                                • You’re always on your phones.
                                • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
                                • You aren’t together during important events.
                                • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
                                • You don’t make plans or date nights.
                                • You’re not happy.

                                If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

                                2. Try New Things Together

                                Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

                                Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

                                Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

                                Advertising

                                Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

                                3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

                                Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

                                Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

                                Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

                                4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

                                One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

                                Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

                                Advertising

                                5. Cook Meals Together

                                Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

                                One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

                                Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

                                If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

                                6. Have a Regular Date Night

                                Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

                                The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

                                Advertising

                                Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

                                • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
                                • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
                                • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
                                • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
                                • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
                                • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
                                • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

                                Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

                                Final Thoughts

                                The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

                                • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
                                • Lowers divorce rates
                                • Improves communication
                                • Reduces marital boredom
                                • Bonds couples closer
                                • Improves friendship
                                • Boosts health
                                • Reduces stress

                                These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

                                It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

                                These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

                                Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

                                Reference

                                Read Next