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8 Reasons It’s Okay to be Quiet

8 Reasons It’s Okay to be Quiet

“The quieter you become the more you can hear.” — Baba Ram Das

I spent years and years battling my quiet temperament, trying to become the extroverted personality that it seemed everyone wanted me to be. It was not until I paused for a moment to appreciate the natural strengths that quiet people possessed, that I was able to embrace the person I was.

In a world that often values extroverted, action-oriented characteristics, such as chatty communication skills and busyness, characteristics in which quiet people excel are often overlooked and forgotten. These characteristics, however, hold a heck of a lot of value. Here are 8 characteristics in which quiet people shine.

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1. Quiet people know how to really listen.

How many times have you found yourself in the midst of a conversation with a colleague, friend, or romantic partner only to look over and notice a glazed look in their eyes and that they’re not really listening to the words you are speaking? If you’re anything like me, a heck of a lot. In a world that rarely stops talking, its rare to find someone listening with quiet intensity to every word you speak. Enter, quiet people.

2. Quiet people are keen observers. They don’t miss much.

In such a fast-paced world, it’s rare to find a reflective, keen observer. Quiet people, however, with less time spent chatting, have more energy to invest towards observing situations and people. Ask a quiet person their thoughts on a situation or person and you may be surprised to receive an extremely reflective and thorough answer. Less talking translates to more reflecting and observing.

3. Quiet people think before they speak.

“I am a minimalist. I like saying the most with the least.” — Bob Newhart

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Ever had the experience of engaging in a work discussion with colleagues? The quiet man or woman in the group, who hardly ever speaks suddenly interjects. What’s the response? The whole room listens. With less time spent talking, quiet people have the time to really think before they speak. In this way, they not only offend few, but also take the time to make sure that what they are saying has true substance. Because they are so selective with words, when they speak, it seems like the whole world stops to listen to what they have to say.

4. Quietude makes them approachable.

With their quiet, relaxed temperament, quiet people are often viewed as fantastic confidants. They are often the ears that others run to for advice, respected for their good listening skills, calm temperament, and cautious words.

5. In the midst of alone time, great productivity is born.

Many quiet people are also introverts, who become charged from alone time. Free from the distractions that often come from being around people all day long, quiet people are able to accomplish a lot with their quiet focus. It is not uncommon to observe a quiet co-worker, alone in his or her office for hours at a time eschewing a quiet focus.

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6. Quiet people rarely intimidate others.

With their lack of loud words and exaggerated actions, quiet people rarely offend others in their presence. It’s rare to see a quiet friend speak rashly, or a quiet co-worker reprimand a boss. Because they don’t intimidate others in their presence, they often make others feel at ease.

7. Quietude exudes calm.

Ever had the experience of approaching a calm, quiet co-worker over a stressful project? Before you knew it, your entire attitude probably changed as their relaxed temperament rubbed off on you. Quiet people tend to have a calming effect on others.

8. Quiet people embrace solitude and all its benefits.

“The monotony and solitude of a quiet life stimulates the creative mind.” — Albert Einstein

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In a fast-paced world, the quiet ones are often forgotten. But more often than not, they are the writers, artists, musicians, and creative thinkers who find their greatest inspiration from one thing and one thing only: solitude.

What are your favorite characteristics of quiet people?

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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