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7 Things Happy People Do That They Won’t Tell You

7 Things Happy People Do That They Won’t Tell You

If there was one common thing that every soul searched on this holy planet, it would be happiness. After all, who doesn’t want to live a stress-free life? It’s the ultimate goal of every human being that helps them to explore the hidden treasures of life.

Happiness can’t be acquired through artificial means. It can only be attained through wisdom. And wisdom can be discovered only in the deepest corner of a person’s subconscious. It is a strenuous activity that demands perseverance and dedication. And these qualities gradually help a person to walk on the path of happiness.

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Likewise, a happy person has certain traits that instinctively help them stand out in the crowd. Here’s a list of seven things that happy people do all the time, but that aren’t that obvious to the casual observer:

1. They practice and preach self-love

Happy people put themselves first every time because they understand the importance of following one’s own passions. If they weren’t serious about mending their own ways, how would they assist others on the road to perfection? When happy people reveal themselves as a complete human being with special and exclusive qualities, others get most of the benefits. Through knowledge and experience they become even more generous and caring. Self-love is totally logical if it empowers other people along with you.

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2. They respect and embrace impermanence

In life, nothing is permanent. Happy people accept this harsh reality with wide-open arms. Time brings about a lot of changes in every person’s life, and people who want to keep pace with it maintain a balance between things to keep and things to let go. Quite often, a happy person releases the unproductive things that do not serve them. They don’t shy away from bringing about a change in their life because they have a bigger plan in mind. One secret to a happy and improved life is letting things go without shedding tears about it. And happy people are masters of this complicated, yet effective quality.

3. They don’t express regret or apology about their dreams and desires

Happy people have the magical ability to ignore all the unnecessary criticism and censure they receive from other people, who are just jealous anyway. When they dream about something big, they dedicate their heart and soul towards achieving it. And it doesn’t matter who tries to be an obstacle on their path to success. They develop a fearless force that assists them to achieve the targets they set for themselves and for others.

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4. They don’t need you to like them

Happy people live in their own world, full of confidence and motivation. They are not concerned about how others perceive them as an individual. An onlooker might call them selfish or obstinate, but happy people are usually not bothered about their views. Instead, they take it as a compliment and move on towards bettering their lives. Through self-confidence they achieve a strange level of selflessness, which many others tend to like in them.

5. They take rejection as protection

Happy people are grateful for other people’s rejection and denial because it motivates them to realize that something bigger is waiting for them ahead in life. They don’t waste time and energy in contemplating what went wrong with others. Instead, they stay focused and never take rejection personally.

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6. They are spiritually inclined

We all know that the creator of this universe, whatever you believe that to be, is the ultimate source of energy for the entire human race. Happy people practice spirituality to grab that unseen energy, which helps them to face bad times with courage. With the help of an ineffable force, they connect with the creator to accomplish the tasks they were put on this planet to achieve.

7. They encourage social relationships

The happiest people on this planet are the ones surrounded by people who add meaning and value to their lives. Happy people nurture social relationships with a big smile on their face. They are always connected to a circle of friends who define their existence, and they tend to make fast friends too.

Featured photo credit: By Wilfredor (Own work) [CC0], via Wikimedia Commons via commons.wikimedia.org

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

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