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7 Signs You Should Move On From Your Relationship

7 Signs You Should Move On From Your Relationship

Can you salvage anything from the wreckage, you ask yourself? Is it really time to move on? These are all tricky questions to answer. One of the biggest problems is that we become so attached to routine we cannot envisage even moving out of familiar territory and into unexplored lands. Here are 7 signs you might want to consider before making the big decision to give up on a relationship and move on.

1. The joy is gone

If you find that the joy has disappeared, there must be a reason. Every relationship cannot be euphoric all the time, but there should be plenty of contentment and laughter. If you find that you are suffering or that your potential to be happy is continually thwarted because of your partner’s actions and words, then it may be time to think this through. If you are often resentful or weepy, there are cracks in your relationship which may be beyond repair.

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“Sexiness wears thin after a while, and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who makes you laugh every day, ah, now that’s a real treat.” – Joanne Woodward

2. You are replaying too many conversations

You know the scenario. You go over and over again in your mind and listen to all those replays! You know the ones where you lost it and shouted or the ones where you were perfectly reasonable and calm. This is a sure sign that shame and regret have crept into the relationship and are becoming leading actors.

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3. You are no longer a team

It is a bad sign if you get the feeling that you are making all the effort while your partner has opted out. Actually, being in a well-functioning team of two is essential for any relationship to thrive. When you realize that you are the one who is going the extra mile, resentment begins to seep through the cracks. You rightly feel that it should not be all one-way traffic.You are the one who is always punctual, patient, understanding and helpful. How come?

4. Your partner tries to please others, but not you

He or she goes out of their way to be generous and patient with other people. It is when you realize that you do not get a fraction of that attention and loving care that you begin to wonder why you are in this relationship at all. Your contact with him or her is becoming sporadic. When you start hearing excuses about work commitments and other engagements, it may be a sign of distancing before the actual break up.

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5. Small skirmishes turn into a full-scale war

Remember those times when your tics and fads were always a bit of a joke and you both tolerated them? When these little issues turn into major drama and end in fights all the time, it may be a sign that you should be thinking of moving on. Before you know it, you find that even the little things like the way you dress and how you look are becoming war zones. Why is this now an issue? You seem to spend more and more time recovering from the bombs dropped by the drones. What is the hidden agenda?

6. Trust has been eroded

When a relationship is flourishing, love, security, and peace are the fruits of complete trust. If the trust has been eroded or damaged in any way, fear and suspicion take over. Perhaps the trust has been irrevocably damaged because of infidelity, hurt, or separation. This may occur when lying takes over or honesty is questioned. Being completely transparent in any relationship is the foundation stone. Once that is altered, the building starts to shake.

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“Trust is the glue of life. It’s the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships.” – Stephen Covey

7. The relationship has turned toxic

We all avoid toxic environments, food, and people. There is a very good reason for this, as these things are harmful to our health. When a relationship turns toxic, it drains you of all the energy and joy of living. You are derided and mocked. You certainly do not feel that you can act in a relaxed and carefree way when you are in their company. There is far too much walking on eggshells. The worst part of a toxic relationship is when you feel trapped by your partner’s judgements and never feel supported.

These are the 7 signs that you are not reaching your full potential for happiness in a relationship which is holding you back and suffocating you. It may well be time to move on.

Featured photo credit: No matter what happens in life … if you will learn to let it go and move forward, then your past doesn’t have to poison your future /BK via flickr.com

More by this author

Robert Locke

Author of Ziger the Tiger Stories, a health enthusiast specializing in relationships, life improvement and mental health.

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Last Updated on March 25, 2020

How to Crush Your Lack of Motivation and Always Stay Motivated

How to Crush Your Lack of Motivation and Always Stay Motivated

How many times have you not achieved your goals and let yourself down due to your lack of motivation? When you’re not wallowing in sadness and self-pity, you are too busy procrastinating till you can’t anymore and before you know it, you are part of vicious cycle of anxiety and stress.

Whether it’s losing weight or bringing your business to fruition – motivation is essential for growth and success in every sphere of our lives.

That said, it is not easy staying motivated. In order to constantly stay motivated, you need to take ownership of your life and consciously make efforts in that direction.

Well, it’s never too late to take matters in your hands and change the course of your life. Here are 11 effective ways to crush your lack of motivation and always stay motivated:

1. Write Your Goals

The power of writing goals down has always been underestimated. Why write when you can remember, right? Wrong.

Our thoughts are all over the place and the first step to achieve your goals is to organize your thoughts. So, write your goals down, however big or small they might be. Make them as specific as possible and assign deadlines to each of them.

As you write them down and revisit them regularly, they get further drilled in your head, taking you closer to your goals. Doing this small exercise helps you to remain focused, motivated and lets you track your progress with ease.

Start today – take to your laptop or a diary and get down to writing what you wish to achieve in life.

2. Beat Procrastination

Your lack of motivation and procrastination go hand in hand. Every time you procrastinate, your motivation levels take a greater hit. The only way to bring an end to this loop is to stop procrastinating.

Next time you find yourself putting off something for ‘later’, stop and assess the reasons behind it. Get to the root of the cause and eliminate it in order to overcome this poor habit of procrastinating which is sabotaging your life and mental health.

Take a look at this guide and learn how to beat procrastination:

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What Is Procrastination (And the Complete Guide to Stop Procrastinating)

When you finally overcome procrastination, you will realize the positive impact it has on your mood and motivation levels.

3. Celebrate Small Wins

In the quest to achieve the bigger goals in life, we often forget to celebrate the smaller wins along the way. An achievement is an achievement – be it big or small, it deserves to be acknowledged and celebrated.

Finished a project on time? Reward yourself. Managed to run on the treadmill for a good one hour? Pat yourself on the back. Found time to meditate? Celebrate it.

It is these small achievements that reinstate that we are on the right path and take us one step closer to the bigger goals.

So, get into the habit of recognizing and appreciating small wins. You will be surprised to see how this practice helps you stay motivated.

4. Practice Gratitude

It’s easier to whine about what we don’t have rather than counting our blessings. Isn’t it?

Making gratefulness a part of your life is a very important step to retain high motivational levels. It revitalizes our spirits and renews our enthusiasm for life.

So, how do you practice gratitude? For starters, keep a gratitude journal to jot down what you are grateful for, express your gratitude to people you love and spread positivity wherever you go. If you need some inspiration to be thankful for, here it is:

60 Things To Be Thankful For In Life

By doing so, you begin to focus more on what you have rather than what you don’t and that is a great start to stay motivated.

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5. Be Optimistic

Life is not always hunky dory. There will be bad days when things aren’t going in your favor, when you feel lost and all you want to do is give up.

At such times, instead of letting negativity take over your life, adopt an optimistic approach to life. Quit overthinking, ask the right questions and focus on finding solutions.

Yes, there will be hurdles along the way but if you hang on to positive affirmations and hopes, the journey will be a lot smoother. So, with every passing day, sow the seeds of positivity and you are sure to build a positive environment around you.

6. Don’t Dwell on the Past

A lot of times, our lack of motivation stems from the habit of dwelling on the past. This gives rise to fear and regrets, preventing us from making progress in the present day.

Dwelling on the past is nothing but a waste of time. Understand that the past is long gone, and you cannot do anything to change that.

What you can do is make your present day worthwhile. Instead of looking back and having regrets, learn from your mistakes, forgive yourself and move on.

So, the next time you find your mind wandering off to the past, be determined to change the way you think and consciously concentrate on living in the present. This guide can help you:

10 Simple Steps To Let Go Of The Past

7. Face your Fears

You can never find motivation where there is fear. Identify the fear that is pulling you back and tackle it.

If you don’t face your fear head on, you cannot expect to conquer it and renew your motivation.

Ask yourself: What is stopping you? What are you scared of?

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Once you accept your fear, you can work on an action plan and think of solutions to overcome it. This article will give you some effective tips on conquering your fears:

How to Overcome Your Irrational Fears (That Stop You from Succeeding)

Seek external help if required but don’t choose to turn a blind eye over your fears – it will only aggravate matters.

8. Visualize your Success

You must have heard the famous quote, ‘see it to believe it’. That is exactly what visualization is about.

One of the most effective self-motivation techniques, visualizing the process to your desired outcome helps you move in a positive direction and achieve your goal.

Close your eyes and focus all your energies on the minutest of details that will take you where you want to reach. Doing this exercise everyday inspires you to keep going and not lose hope. The vision of attaining success will drive you to do better while instilling belief and confidence.

9. Find Inspiration

Can’t seem to find inspiration inwards? Don’t panic. There are plenty of external sources to gain inspiration from.

From motivational books and quotes to speeches, films and apps – it is a good idea to take help from motivational material to rekindle your spirits and regain your motivation.

Everyone is wired differently. For instance, a self-help book might work for your friend, but it might do nothing to move you. So, find what inspires you and turn to it when you are in desperate need for motivation.

Finding inspiration externally fills you with hope and sometimes that is all you need.

10. Enjoy Downtime

You are clearly exhausted with all the running you’re doing in life. So much, that you don’t even have time to stop and think what’s causing you so much unhappiness. All you know is that you are lacking motivation and everyday seems to have become a struggle.

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Now, that’s certainly not how you should live the rest of your life.

You need to schedule downtime for yourself, relax and give your mind and body some rest. Take a vacation, indulge in hobbies, meet some friends, put your hair down and stop with all the overthinking. It is important to do things that make you happy in order to think clearly and stay motivated.

11. Meditate Regularly

Meditation lets you take control of your mind. It improves focus and concentration while helping you relax.

Whenever you have had a tough day or find your thoughts going places, the best way to calm yourself down is by closing your eyes and meditating. It helps you to remove all the unnecessary frills in life and keeps you on the right track.

Include meditation in your daily schedule and you are sure to see an improvement in your productivity and motivation.

The Bottom Line

Practicing these simple exercises isn’t the tough part, what’s tough is religiously doing them every day.

However, don’t expect to get rid of your lack of motivation overnight. There will still be days when you will be low on energy but by making these conscious efforts to stay motivated, you are sure to see a vast change in your perspective and your response to bad days.

So, start today and be committed to making a positive change in your life.

More Tips About Staying Motivated

Featured photo credit: Sonnie Hiles via unsplash.com

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