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6 Things About Life You Can’t Learn From Reading

6 Things About Life You Can’t Learn From Reading

Remember the park scene in Good Will Hunting where Robin Williams reminds Matt Damon that just because he can quote from books doesn’t mean that he knows what he’s talking about. It’s considered one of the best scenes in (arguably) one of the best movies in cinematic history.

There’s a world of difference between reading something and applying it; anyone can repeat theory, but experience is where you’ll truly learn what it takes to go from point A to point B. Although your neighbor, classmate, or coworker can repeat the words from Mark Cuban’s biography, only Cuban himself truly understands what it took for him to get where he’s at – everyone else is just repeating the story.

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Some things need to be experienced to truly be internalized. Here are some things about life (skills, lessons, etc.) that you can’t learn just by reading about them:

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    I’m entirely sure this isn’t how reading glasses are supposed to work…

    Reading Can’t Teach You How to Close a Sale…

    You can read every sales manual in the world; you can even follow a generic script that’s “guaranteed to work.” All the reading in the world won’t give you the instinct necessary to close a sale and get that payment. If sales were as easy as reading a book, everyone would be selling books on how to sell, and everyone would be buying that book…and it would all just cancel out.

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    Reading Won’t Teach You How to Leave a Job…

    Quitting a job is something that everyone has advice for, but at the end of the day, you just have to do it. Leaving a job is like skydiving in that the anticipation is often worse than the actual event (unless, of course, you die). The butterflies in your stomach, your manager’s reaction – no matter how prepared you think you are, you won’t truly know the effects of quitting your job until you do it.

    Reading Doesn’t Teach You How to Write…

    Ok, yes…reading does teach literacy, which involves writing as well. What it doesn’t teach you, however, is how to truly open yourself up and write something meaningful – if it were that easy, every wannabe rapper would be on the cover of The Source magazine. The only way to learn how to write is to write…and write…and write…and…well, you get the idea.

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    Reading Won’t Teach You How to Overcome Failure…

    You can read all the steps and how-tos about recovering from failure, learning valuable life lessons on the way, but if it were that easy, there wouldn’t be so many cynics in the world. People are cynical because they’ve failed at something and decided it’s an impossible task not only for them, but for anyone. What lesson you learn from failure depends entirely on how you internalize the lesson and your personal thoughts and feelings are not something you can read about.

    Reading Doesn’t Teach You How to Say No…

    Rejecting another person is a difficult thing to do, especially when that person is particularly pushy or motivated to convince you. No matter how many books you read about confidence and body language, you have to actually execute it repeatedly if it’s ever going to work.

    Reading Can’t Teach Love…

    No amount of romance novels, porn, or relationship/dating manuals can explain what it’s like to experience love. When you’re a kid, you think falling in love is everything, and losing that love can feel suffocating and trap you in a mental prison. As you get older, you realize how much heartbreak you face in life – explaining those lessons to a young idealist as you once were, however, is impossible.

    As you can see, reading is fundamental, but it doesn’t teach you everything in life. Being well-read is important, and quoting literature is seen as a sign of intelligence in human society. Creating your own story however, is just as important as understanding the stories of others. If you want to be a human being and not just a robot, go out into the world and live, rather than sitting online or in a library, reading about other people’s experiences. You have more to gain than lose.

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    Last Updated on October 16, 2019

    5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships

    5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships

    We all have relationships. We have acquaintances, relatives, colleagues, neighbors and friends. However, for a large percentage of us, many of these relationships are not fulfilling.

    They are unfulfilling because they lack real strength; and they lack real strength because they lack real depth.

    Unfortunately, in today’s society, we tend to have shallow, superficial relationships with others, and it’s extremely hard for this kind of relationships to provide anything more than faint satisfaction.

    I’d like to show you, based on my experience as a communication and confidence coach, how you can add a significant amount of depth, and thus strength, to your relationships and make your social life a whole lot more meaningful.

    Here’re 5 simple yet powerful ways for meaningful relationships building:

    1. Meet More People

    This is an apparent paradox, but the quality of the people you meet has considerably to do with the quantity of people you meet.

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    If you don’t know a lot of people and you barely meet one or two new people every season of the year, considering the variety of individuals out there, you won’t meet very often people who are a good match with you in terms of personality, interests and values.

    And since this natural match plays a huge part in building strong relationships, you’ll just as seldom have the opportunity to develop strong relationships.

    Conversely, if you go out a lot, you meet a lot of new people and you constantly expand your social circle, you’re much more likely to meet people you match up well with, and these people have a tremendous potential to become good friends, reliable partners, etc.

    This is why it’s important to meet more people.

    2. Talk about the Things That Matter To You

    A relationship becomes the strongest when two people discover they believe in the same things and have similar interests. It’s these commonalities regarding values and interests that create the strongest emotional connection.

    I’ve noticed that many people keep conversations shallow. They talk about trivial stuff such as the weather, what’s on TV, the lives of various movie stars, but they rarely talk about what really matters to them in life. This is a mistake from my perspective, because it’s the perfect method for a relationship to not develop.

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    Talk about the things that truly matter to you and give others a chance to know what you care about and what you believe in. If they believe in the same things and they care about the same things, they’ll eagerly let you know. Thus you’ll find meaningful common ground and you’ll feel more connected.

    3. Express Vulnerability

    Many people try to come off as perfect. They don’t talk about their failures, they hide their shortcomings and they never say anything that could embarrass them.

    This is all just a facade though. You may appear perfect to some, but you know you’re not perfect and they know that too. You’re only human and humans have flaws.

    However, by hiding your flaws, what you do succeed in is appearing cold and impersonal. You seem like a marble statue rather than a real person. And this makes it very hard for anyone to connect with you emotionally.

    Humans connect with other humans, not with ideals. Keep this in mind and don’t be afraid to let your vulnerability and your humanity show. This is what takes a relationship to the next level.

    Take a look at this article and find out Why Showing Vulnerability Actually Proves Your Strength.

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    4. Have Integrity

    Integrity, as I see it, is the alignment between your thoughts, your words and your actions. When you say what you think and you do what you said you’ll do, you have integrity.

    This is a crucial trait because if you have integrity, people can trust you. They can trust you to give them an honest feedback, even when it’s hard to shallow, and they can trust you to keep your promises.

    This trust is one of the central pillars of a strong relationship, both in your personal and your professional life. So, as challenging as it can be sometimes, always try to have integrity.

    Be honest with the people around you, even when this will initially hurt them. It’s more important for them to trust you than to not feel hurt. And always do what you promised. Even better, think twice before you promise anything, and only promise what you really can and you are willing to do.

    5. Be There for Others

    Another central pillar of strong relationships is support. Connections between people grow sturdy if they can rely on each other for support when it’s needed, whether that support means a few kind words or several massive actions.

    Of course, you can’t be there for everybody, all the time. Your time, energy and other resources are limited. But what you can do is identify the genuinely important people in your life and then seek to be there as much as possible, at least for them.

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    Your support will help them practically, and it will comfort them emotionally; which makes one hell of a difference in a relationship.

    The Bottom Line

    With the right mindset and the right behavior, you can strengthen a wide range of relationships in your life and advance them as far as they can be advanced.

    And with strong relationships, not only that you feel more fulfilled, but you feel more connected to the entire world. You feel that your life has real value, you have more fun and you live in the moment. An entire world of opportunities opens up in front of you.

    Then your task is to simply walk through the open doors.

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